Bittersweet

by Jannine Gallant

  Wesley turned to Tess and smiled. “Is dinner ready?”

  “It will be by the time you two wash up.”

  He rubbed his hands together. “Let’s go, then. I’m hungry enough to eat a bear.”

  “I’m afraid you’ll have to settle for fried chicken.”

  He dropped his arm around her shoulders as they walked back to the house. “Is Nathan joining us?”

  She looked over at Daniel. “He couldn’t come.”

  “That’s too bad. I saw him yesterday and was going to ask about Jack Craven, but he seemed preoccupied.”

  Anxiety crept in, edging around her happiness. “Craven got away again. I’d rather not talk about him today, Pa, if you don’t mind.”

  His wise eyes studied her. “I get the feeling you two have other matters to discuss.”

  “We’ll tell you all about it at dinner.”

  Wesley didn’t say anything more. When they were seated at the table, Tess said grace, adding a heartfelt amen. She jumped up a moment later to grab the butter forgotten in the pantry.

  Nora passed the gravy to her husband. “My, you are skittish today, Tess. Sit down and eat.”

  “Maybe you would find it easier to relax if you just told us what’s on your mind,” Wesley said.

  Nora dropped her knife. “What are you talking about, dear?”

  “I believe Tess and Daniel have some news to share.”

  “Do you, Tess?”

  She nodded and reached across the table. His hand closed around hers, strong and steadying. “Daniel and I are getting married.”

  “No!” Nora’s hand flew to her chest. “But you and Nathan—”

  “We broke it off, Mama.”

  “My goodness, I don’t know what to say.”

  “I do. Congratulations.” Wesley leaned over and gave Tess a hug. He shook Daniel’s hand and smiled. “I’m glad you came to your senses before it was too late.”

  Fay patted her lips with her napkin. “Congratulations. I wondered when you would get around to telling us.”

  Tess’s eyes widened as she stared at her aunt. “You knew?”

  “Tess, dear, it was plainly obvious. I’ve spent more evenings in my room in order to give you two a little privacy than I can count.”

  Daniel laughed. “Thank you, Fay. Your discretion was appreciated.”

  “Of course I’m happy for you both,” Nora said, “but I must admit you caught me by surprise.”

  Wesley chuckled. “Imagine your mama surprised speechless.”

  “Don’t count on it happening again,” Nora said with good humor. “Come, let’s hear all the details.”

  “I won’t say a word until you promise to eat. The food is getting cold.”

  While they ate, Tess answered the questions Nora fired at her. Her spirits soared, the weight of half truths lifted at last.

  “When did Daniel propose, and for heaven’s sake, why did it take so long?”

  “We settled everything in Denver, Mama.”

  Daniel laid down his fork. “We didn’t make plans sooner because I’m a stubborn fool. I was worried about betraying Rory’s memory. Tess finally made me see reason.”

  “So that was it,” Wesley said. “I wondered what was keeping you two apart. I knew you loved each other.”

  Tess stared at her father. “Was it that obvious?”

  “It was to me, but I know my little girl awfully well.” He patted her arm.

  “Have you talked to Nathan yet?” Nora asked.

  Tess nodded and scooped a spoonful of potatoes into Emily’s mouth. “I told him the night he returned. Before you say anything else, I want you to know I feel sick about misleading him.”

  “It’s better to end it now than endure a lifetime of misery loving a man who isn’t your husband,” Wesley said.

  “Still, I deeply regret causing him pain. Nathan is a good man.”

  “Yes, he is, but you two weren’t meant for each other. I’m relieved it’s over. You’ve made the right choice.”

  “Thank you, Pa. You always know what to say to make me feel better.”

  “You listen to your pa,” Fay added. “There’s nothing worse than a loveless marriage.”

  Nora frowned. “I’m happy for you both, you know that, but I’m concerned about Lottie. She’s barely come out of her room for days. She’s hurting.”

  Tess dropped her napkin on the table. Even in her absence, her sister managed to spoil the moment. “Mama, Lottie didn’t love Daniel. If anything is hurt, it’s her pride.”

  “No, I tell you something’s wrong. You’ve seen how she’s acting, Wesley.”

  He nodded and cleared his throat. “Lottie hasn’t been herself, I agree. But it started a while back, right after you told us about Nathan’s proposal.”

  “There, you see, Mama. You’re worrying for nothing. Lottie is jealous I’m the one getting married. She told me as much, herself.”

  “I hope that’s it. I don’t want her heart to be broken.”

  Tess changed the subject. “We haven’t discussed where we’ll hold the ceremony.”

  “How about at my house?” Daniel suggested. “We could stand down by the little grove of aspens and exchange our vows.”

  “That would be perfect! In a few more weeks the leaves will have turned, and the grove will be simply beautiful.”

  “Have you set a date?” Fay asked.

  “When the corn is harvested.” Tess looked at Daniel, excitement coursing through her. This man would be her husband. The love and companionship she’d missed so dearly would be hers again. “Let’s plan for the first Saturday in October. How does that sound?”

  He groaned. “Like too many weeks to wait. I’ll be finished with the harvest before then.”

  “All right, the last Saturday in September. If we have a cold snap between now and then, the leaves will be turning.”

  He smiled. “You’ll be my wife before the month is out.”

  Her gaze met his. “I can’t think of anything more wonderful than that.”

  When the meal was over, the men went outside, leaving the women to clean the kitchen.

  Nora carried dishes from the table to the sink with a heavy tread. “Tess, why didn’t you tell me about your plans while we were canning?”

  “For the same reason I didn’t breathe a word to Aunt Fay. I wanted to, Mama. I really did. But I hadn’t spoken to Nathan yet. It wouldn’t have been right to tell you before I talked to him.”

  “I suppose not. When do you plan to tell your sister?”

  Tess sighed. “She would probably take the news better hearing it from you. She never really loved Daniel, but she’s bound to be angry.”

  Nora shook her head. “You two girls are so different. Why is it you keep choosing the same men to love?”

  “What do you mean?” Tess asked.

  “Surely you knew Lottie had a crush on Rory when he was courting you?”

  Her hands stilled in the dishwater. “Mama, she was all of sixteen at the time. You must be mistaken.”

  “I’m not. Maybe you were too involved to see it, and of course Rory never encouraged her.”

  “She got over it soon enough. Look at all the men she’s kept company with the last few years.”

  “She wasn’t serious about any of them,” Nora persisted.

  Tess smiled halfheartedly and tried to lighten the mood. “It just shows we both have good taste in men. We must have inherited it from you.”

  “It isn’t a laughing matter, Tess,” Fay scolded.

  “You’re right, but I still say Lottie never really loved Daniel.”

  She was still thinking about her sister when her parents left for home. Daniel wrapped his arms around her waist. “A penny for your thoughts.”

  She leaned back against him. “Something Mama said is bothering me.”

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  “Oh, it’s silly. Apparently Lottie had a school girl crush on Rory years ago. Then she decided you
were the one, and now I’m wondering about her feelings for Nathan. She always went on and on about how handsome he is.”

  “Why are you letting it worry you?”

  She sighed. “I can’t help it. It’s no wonder she resents me.”

  “It’s difficult constantly walking in someone’s shadow.” He turned her to face him. “You have to find your own strengths, Tess, and make the most of them. Lottie will discover that for herself one of these days.”

  “I suppose so.” She shook off her mood with an effort and smiled up at Daniel. “How shall we spend the rest of the afternoon?”

  “I was planning to get some work done.”

  “You work too hard.”

  He pulled her close. “Did you have something in mind?”

  “Emily is taking a nap, and Aunt Fay went for a drive with Doc Fredericks.”

  “That sounds promising.”

  “It would give us an opportunity to talk about our wedding without interruption.”

  He waved her suggestion aside. “You and your mother make whatever plans you like. I can think of better ways to spend an hour alone with you.”

  Her heartbeat quickened as he nuzzled the side of her neck. His lips skimmed over the sensitive skin below her ear, and she caught her breath.

  “We’ve never made love in the middle of the day.” His fingers went to work on the long row of buttons fastening her bodice.

  Her pulse raced. “Daniel, we’re in the kitchen. Anyone could walk right up to the door and look in.”

  “No one is going to come calling late on a Sunday afternoon.”

  “Maybe we should go upstairs.”

  He lifted her skirts and hoisted her up onto the table. “I want to stay right here.”

  “We can’t, not on the table.”

  “It’s sturdy enough. I should know since I built it.”

  She ran her fingers through his hair and touched the lines feathering out from the corners of his eyes. “It’s decadent.”

  “It’s exciting.” He finished with her buttons and peeled the dress away from her shoulders. He untied her chemise, and her breasts spilled free into his hands. His breath was warm against her skin as his mouth fastened onto one pink tip, igniting a fire deep in her belly.

  She groaned and pulled him closer. “You’ve convinced me.”

  His mouth moved to her other breast, and his hands crept up beneath her skirt. He pushed aside layers of petticoats and reached her pantalets.

  “Lift your hips.” His breath came fast, and his eyes burned with desire.

  “Daniel, how can we?”

  “I’ll show you.” He slid the pantalets down her legs and pulled her forward to the edge of the table.

  As he stepped between her legs, his hands fumbled with the buttons on his trousers. His mouth ravished hers. When he finally drew back, she glanced down and saw he was free of his trousers. She caught her breath, excitement slamming through her.

  He grasped her hips. “Ready?”

  She nodded and watched him slide his length inside her, more aroused than she’d believed possible. He let out a shuddering sigh. She wrapped her legs around his waist and groaned when he began to move.

  “God, Tess,” he said through gritted teeth.

  She clung to his shoulders, threw her head back, and closed her eyes. Already the sensation was nearly beyond bearing. To make it last she concentrated on the hard table beneath her hips, his harsh breathing in her ear, and the lingering aroma of fried chicken. But the incredible feeling of Daniel, silky hard and hot, sliding in and out of her overwhelmed her. She bucked forward and nearly toppled from the table.

  His grip was bruising. His body shook as he released his seed and collapsed against her. She rested, secure in his arms for endless minutes while her heartbeat slowed and her breathing returned to normal. He lifted his head and smiled at her.

  “This is one terrific table.”

  She laughed. “I may never want to make love in a bed again.”

  “You might change your mind when you discover a few aches and pains tomorrow morning.”

  “Speak for yourself.”

  His eyes gleamed. “We could try the front room next.”

  “And there’s always the barn.”

  He squeezed her waist. “Get down from the table, missy, before you tempt me further.”

  She slid into his arms. Their lips met in a long, lingering kiss. With a sigh, he broke away.

  “I have chores to do.”

  “And I should think about starting supper.”

  As the afternoon waned, Tess worked with lightness in her step and happiness in her heart.

  * * * *

  Tess crouched on her hands and knees, scrubbing the kitchen floor when she heard someone drive into the yard. She dropped the brush into the bucket of water and wiped her hands on her apron. Lottie was half way across the yard by the time she reached the door.

  Hellfire and damnation. I don’t need this now. Forcing a smile, she called out a greeting.

  “Hello, Tess.” Lottie’s eyes dropped to her chest and widened. “What happened to you?”

  “I bound my breasts this morning.” Tess looked down at her flattened figure. “I’m weaning Emily, and she’s not happy about it.”

  Lottie’s lips twitched. “It doesn’t look very comfortable.”

  “It’s not. Would you like a glass of iced tea? I just made some.” Tess headed back into the kitchen.

  Lottie followed. “No, I don’t want any tea. This isn’t a social call.”

  She turned to face her sister. “Then why are you here?”

  “Because I thought it was time someone told you a few home truths. You’re not a nice person, Tess.”

  She sighed, her irritation mounting. “Do we need to have this conversation?”

  “Yes, we need to have it!” Lottie shouted.

  “Keep your voice down. I owe you the courtesy of listening, but so help me if you wake Emily, I’ll toss you out of here.”

  “It’s always about you. Your baby! Your fiancé! Your wedding plans! I’m sick to death of you and what you want.”

  “I changed my mind.” Tess stalked to the door and held it open. “I don’t have to listen to this.”

  “Well, you’re going to listen. You always get everything you want. The boys liked you more when we were growing up, and nothing has changed. You couldn’t let me have the one man I really wanted. You had to have both Daniel and Nathan.”

  “You’re wrong, Lottie. I don’t have them both. Isn’t Nathan the man you care about? Go tell him how you feel instead of shouting at me.”

  “I tried.” Lottie’s eyes filled with tears. “But he’s leaving, and it’s your fault. He doesn’t want to be around you, so I’ll never get a chance with him.”

  “Convince him to stay.”

  “It’s too late. He’s going back home, all the way to South Carolina where his family is. He’ll be so far away I’ll never see him again. I hate you, Tess. I hate you!”

  Turning, Lottie ran out of the house and across the yard. The buggy flew down the driveway followed by a plume of dust.

  Tess stood in the kitchen doorway, her heart heavy in her chest. She and Lottie had never been true friends, but for her sister to say she hated her was a blow. They were family. She slumped into a chair next to the bucket of soapy water. Part of the kitchen floor was still damp.

  Fay entered the room and cleared her throat. “I didn’t want to interrupt earlier, but I thought you might need a sympathetic ear.”

  Tess’s voice caught. “She’s very, very bitter.”

  “Lottie is emotional. You know that.” Fay glanced out the window and laid her hand on Tess’s shoulder. “Here comes Daniel. Talk to him. I’ll be in the front room.”

  Daniel pushed open the screen door, and his gaze met hers. “I saw Lottie fly by like a bat out of hell.”

  “It was awful,” she whispered. “My own sister hates me.”

  He pulled her out of th
e chair and into his arms. “She’s angry. She doesn’t hate you.”

  Tess swallowed. “She’s so resentful, Daniel. I had no idea.”

  His eyes were full of confusion. “That doesn’t make sense. There was never anything between Lottie and me.”

  “It isn’t about you. She’s upset because Nathan is leaving town. She’s in love with him.”

  Daniel frowned. “Can we do anything about it?”

  “I don’t know what it would be. I can hardly ask Nathan to stay for the sake of my sister after the way I treated him.”

  “No, I guess not. Lottie will forget about him in time. She always does.” He kissed her. “You worry too much.” He kissed her again. “Did you know Emily is crying?”

  Tess listened for a moment and sighed. “It’s not time for her to wake up from her nap.”

  “Then leave her. Maybe she’ll go back to sleep.”

  “No, she’s upset because I’m weaning her.”

  “Is that the reason you feel all flat in front?” He touched her squashed breasts.

  She nodded. “I wrapped them with a piece of sheet. They hurt, Daniel.”

  He stroked her hair. “It will get better. I promise.”

  She took a step back. “I’m not so certain.”

  “Emily will adjust, and Lottie will come around eventually.”

  “Maybe Lottie’s pain would be easier to bear if we weren’t throwing our happiness in her face.”

  He frowned. “What are you saying?”

  She crossed her arms over her bound chest and took a breath, forcing air into her lungs. The pain in her chest was nothing compared to the agony in her heart. “Maybe we should postpone our wedding.”

  He stared at her. “You don’t want to get married?”

  “Of course I do, but…”

  “But what?”

  She rubbed the back of her neck. “Everything is such a mess. Nathan is leaving town, and Lottie blames me. I blame myself. If I hadn’t been in such a rush to find a husband, I would never have hurt Nathan the way I did. If I had just given you a little more time…” Her voice trailed off. “Maybe we’re acting in haste.”

  “How can that be true after everything you said about my pride stand in the way of our happiness? Tess, this is wrong.”

  “My problem isn’t pride, Daniel. It’s guilt.”