“That, is my boyfriend and that is who I choose to be with, so if you stopped acting like an ass around him then it would make it a Hell of a lot easier for me to be around you!” I ranted up at him before trying to storm off but not getting very far from him. He followed me close enough so that I could feel the angry heat at my back and I knew if I stopped for a second he would run right into me.
“And that is precisely what we need to discuss.” He growled in my ear making me spin back round to face him.
“No, we don’t! You have no say in who I date Draven and the sooner you come to realise that the better!” I said feeling so angry it was like my heart was going burst out of my chest any minute, so it too could slap him!
“And just now, when I had you trembling in my arms with just the thought of when I was about to kiss you?” He said with his face getting closer to mine as if aiding him whilst making his point. I on the other hand could feel my jaw go slack in utter shock.
“Uh…sorry?” I whispered completely dumbstruck.
“You want me to say it again or follow through with my desires to drive my point home, because I am pretty sure either way it gives me a damn right in who touches you!” Okay so he was definitely angry now but I was still left playing catch up on what the hell I had just missed!
“I…uh…but you said…uh…okay Draven, now I’m confused.” I admitted letting my shoulders slump and taking a much needed step back from all this and not just physically.
“What I said?” He looked just as confused for a moment before something must have registered when he looked back at me.
“Keira I…” Draven started but was abruptly cut off when I heard my name being called from the front desk. I looked over to see RJ waving me over like a mad woman, with Lanie stood next to her wearing her usual shy smile.
“Look I have to go.” I said feeling like some sad, deflated balloon that had been left out far too long after the celebrations had all ended.
“Just give me a minute to explain, that’s all I ask.”
“I can’t,” I replied softly trying not to look him in the eyes, knowing I would crack if I did.
“Can’t or won’t?” I could tell by the way he asked me that question that he wasn’t happy about being told no, but what else could I do? I had to make the decision at some point that this needed to end before it began, because no matter what Draven really felt or wanted, it wasn’t ever going to be enough to go back in time. I couldn’t allow him to have that power over me again. I couldn’t allow him to kiss me and then eventually take it back.
For no matter what I wanted in the heat of the moment I knew in the long run I had to keep my heart safe and guarded because at the end of that kiss was the inevitable waiting to happen…
Rejection. Pain. And then devastation with Draven walking away…yet again. No, I couldn’t let that kiss ever happen no matter how much I wanted it…craved it and normally would have fought tooth and nail to get it.
But not this time.
So with that in mind I answered him before walking away with a decision that felt so wrong it was lodged in my throat, making this one word all the more harder to get out…
“Both.”
Chapter 13
In Bad Taste
Walking away from Draven wasn’t easy, not by a long shot but I knew it was better for me in the long run. Having Alex turn up when he had was the wakeup call I needed. I didn’t mind being friends with Draven, as it was better than nothing but I was going to have to put a stop right now to all the mixed messages I was receiving. It wasn’t fair to me and my fragile heart to keep putting me through this. It was confusing enough just trying to find the right balance to be friends, but having him backing me into a corner and nearly kissing me was taking it to a whole new level of cruelty.
I knew enough about Draven that if he wanted something he would simply take it, which included me. If something had changed in the fates that meant we could finally be together then I couldn’t imagine Draven taking his time in letting it be known that he wanted me back. But that hadn’t happened. And unless I missed the memo, nothing had changed and nothing ever would. No, I couldn’t do this and I quickly realised something when I had turned round to see Draven with Alex still at my back. If it hadn’t been for him knowing about Alex, then Draven wouldn’t even have been here let alone nearly kissing me, which only meant one thing…
Draven was only reacting to this because he felt threatened.
The thought was a depressing one but there was no other explanation for his behaviour. Vincent had been right that night on top of the cliff. I would have been devastated to find out Draven hadn’t cared when finding out that I was with Alex but what Vincent didn’t realise was that Draven’s reaction to it was just as devastating.
Of course, just because I had made up my mind didn’t mean I could let it go. It didn’t mean I didn’t start obsessing over every little detail in the last twenty four hours! Because let’s face it, that’s what us girls did. We analysed every single thing and looked for the hidden meaning as if we were cracking that damn Da Vinci Code of men!
Which brought me to now and standing in front of the mirror staring at the borrowed dress I wore wondering if it was good enough for Alex. I think in the long list of differences between Alex and Draven one thing always stood out the most and that was how unsure I now felt about myself. I knew Alex liked the finer things in life as blatantly did my ex but unlike Draven Alex seemed to find them far more important than they were ever meant to be. He cared about the designer names and the flashy cars, always explaining how much things cost. And yes, Draven had all of this but never once did he ever make it seem that important to him. It was always just stuff to him, stuff that could be replaced or even forgotten. Surely that’s how it should have been…right?
So that was why I now fidgeted in my high heels that pinched my little toes and rubbed the back of my heels to a point I knew I would need plasters at some point this evening. But yet here I was, wearing a dress that wasn’t mine just because it had an expensive label and shoes that were too tight because they were designer. And I was staring at a girl I didn’t know. So I guess the right question was… if Draven hadn’t cared what I wore back then, then why did I care about what Alex thought about what I was wearing now?
I didn’t have an answer.
“Wow, you look amazing, Kazzy!” Libby said pulling me from my depressing thoughts. I looked down at the clingy navy dress that was long sleeved and finished a few naughty inches above my knees. It was made with the most beautiful and intricate lace and had a simple satin ribbon around the waist like a thin belt. The underneath was lined in the same colour navy but had a sweetheart neckline so the lace showed my skin above my breasts and on my shoulders and arms. This meant I could just get away without wearing gloves and not worry about my scars showing due to the many flowers and swirls laced together.
“You don’t think it’s too much?” I asked playing with the loose curls that spilled over the up do Libby had helped me with earlier.
“What? No, of course not…and anyway, Alex did say he was taking you somewhere fancy, right?” I nodded not trusting my fragile state of mind right now from blurting out about how I had seen Draven. I knew at some point I wouldn’t be able to keep it from her but right now…well let’s just say ignorance was a blissful state I could only wish for but at least it was something I could give my sister. I knew she would be worried about me considering the Zombie Kaz she’d had to deal with last year.
God, but I wanted to cringe when thinking back to how I was when I got back from Italy. But if the past had taught me anything, then I knew I would only end up hurting the people who cared for me more by keeping them in the dark and not letting them in. Of course there was more I couldn’t say to Libs than what I could, but it hadn’t mattered. All that was important was at the very core of my problem and that was that Draven had lied and left me. Full stop. That was the root of my pain and in that she could help, no
t with words but with just being there. So I might have been a Zombie but this time I was a Zombie with a partner in crime…just not the flesh eating variety!
“I know you will be jet-setting off tomorrow but it’s still about time you had some fun and you look knock out in that dress!”
“Thank you for lending it to me.” At this she scoffed and said,
“Well I don’t think I will be wearing it for a while, not unless it looks good with baby puke and sticky hand prints.” I laughed at my sister’s no doubt correct assumption to what would happen. Even now she had a stain on her t-shirt that I couldn’t tell whether it was juice or drool.
“Well at least that’s one promise I can make when wearing it, unless Alex’s dinner habits have drastically changed…Eeew.” I added making her laugh with me.
“Kazzy, your date’s here!” We both heard Frank bellow from downstairs and I winced at the sound of his tone.
“Don’t mind him, he just liked Dom is all and you know how weird men can be with these types of things.” Libby said referring to the fact that Frank obviously didn’t like Alex. It wasn’t that he was openly rude or anything but he did always lay the whole big brother act on a little too thick whenever he stepped through the door. Also, for some reason he outright refused to call him my boyfriend, even though we had been dating a while now. However I just shrugged it all off like I usually did.
We both left what was now my new room, as I still couldn’t face the one I had before, what with all the painfully beautiful memories it still held. Downstairs I was met by one handsome Frenchman who was wearing a different suit to what he’d had on earlier. He gave me the once over and my heart almost stopped waiting for his reaction. It was only when I saw one side of his lip tilt up that I knew I had got it right.
I always thought that when he smiled like that there was a dark sinister side to him lurking just beneath the surface but then I always felt guilty for thinking so. I think it was because he had such strong angular features, like now, the way he got a crease in his cheek with that one sided grin. His high cheekbones and defined straight nose that others would have called ‘beak like’ if they had wanted to be cruel. But I just thought it suited the rest of his face. Yes it sometimes gave him an air of arrogance but I think that was just down to his upbringing in France and coming from a different culture.
“You look lovely.” He said reaching out for my hand as I took my last steps from the stairs.
“Thanks,” I replied softly. Frank cleared his throat and I mentally rolled my eyes before facing him with an amused smile.
“Will you need me to pick you up again tonight?” Frank asked and I grimaced at how it sounded. Okay so there had been that time when Alex was called in for an emergency meeting and Frank had to pick me up at the restaurant because it would have taken Alex too long to drop me back home. I knew Frank hadn’t been happy with his behaviour but I understood that work sometimes got in the way. I mean, he was just trying to build up his career, so why should dating me put a stop to that? Frank hadn’t seen it that way at all, which was why the next time it happened I had called RJ.
“She will be fine, Frank.” Alex said in a tone that clearly meant his patience was cracking and under Frank’s intimidating look I got why. Frank had his arms crossed and looked anything but friendly which I still wasn’t used to considering Frank was normally as friendly as they came. Needless to say Alex hadn’t been invited to dinner like Draven had.
“Come on Catherine, we have reservations.” Then Alex led me through the door with only enough time to grab my purse from Libby. She didn’t look too pleased and I didn’t know who it was aimed at this time, so I just mouthed the word ‘Men’ at her and rolled my eyes.
“Call me if you need me, Kazzy!” Frank shouted through the door and to try and lighten the mood I shouted back,
“Thanks dad!” Making him chuckle at my light hearted banter.
“Sorry about that.” I muttered as Alex opened the passenger side door for me.
“Forget about it, I am not concerned if he likes me or not, Catherine.” I didn’t really like the idea that Alex didn’t care what my family thought but I guess now wasn’t the time to discuss it.
“Oh I forgot my jacket.” I said before getting into his shiny new Porsche 911, which I knew had cost him over a hundred thousand dollars thanks to being told a few times. I don’t really know where he got his money from exactly as I doubted it was something he could afford on his salary…but what did I know.
“You won’t need it,” he replied and nodded for me to get in, which I did hoping the night wouldn’t turn chilly later. Well I suppose if we actually managed to make it through to dessert then it meant I wouldn’t be needing one, seeing as he would be able to drive me home this time.
We sat in what I hoped was comfortable silence for most of the drive and it was only when taking the freeway, as they say here, that I recognised we were headed into the city.
“So where are you taking me?” I asked trying to sound more excited than I actually felt. I didn’t really know why I had started to feel this way but if I had to venture a guess, I would say all answers began with a D.
“To this new place called One Eight Seven, my friend is a chef there so he got us the table, otherwise the waiting list is months.” My eyes widened and I started to play with my sleeves again, as I always seemed to do when nervous. I wasn’t great in posh situations and the waiting list told me exactly what type of place this would be.
“That sounds nice.” I said trying to sound more positive than I felt. The last thing I wanted to do was embarrass him by doing something daft like dropping a prawn down my top or snorting in my soup.
The rest of the way there zoomed by like the cars on the opposite side and the closer we got, the more I wished I was zooming that way with them. I was still in this weird funk until I jumped when the door was opened for me. Alex stood there holding out his hand and I got out of the car to see the imposing modern building and its stylish logo. It was the word ‘One’ and ‘Seven’ with the number eight slanted between them. The building was all frosted glass windows that produced a warm glow behind them from what I guessed was the ambient lighting.
I was all for romance and everything but I was one of those people who liked to see what I was actually eating. Okay, now I just sounded like I was picking and bitching for no good reason.
“Shall we?” Alex said after handing the valet his keys. I nodded and put my arm in his, thankful for it so I didn’t stumble in these heels. The door was opened for us and just as we reached the gorgeous looking hostess Alex’s phone started to beep. Dread filled me as he reached into his pocket and read a text message with a frown. The hostess looked me up and down like I was wearing something from her granny’s wardrobe and then turned her eyes to Alex with a smirk. I instantly hated her and her ultra-modern hairstyle, that if you asked me looked more like she was getting ready to be shot out of a cannon than a bob cut.
“Do you have a reservation, Sir?” She purred but Alex wasn’t taking any notice. I would have liked to have said it was because he had me on his arm but no, this time it was his phone that was getting all the attention.
“Alex?” I whispered and gave him a nudge.
“Yes, we have a reservation, it’s under the name Cain.” She looked down her list and then with a nod asked us to follow her. As we walked through the open space that was clearly an expensive interior designer’s wet dream I leant into Alex and whispered,
“Is everything alright?” The look he gave me was all the answer I needed. I had a feeling I was going to be in need of that jacket after all. We let the hostess seat us in the middle of everyone else, which was another small pet hate of mine. I liked my food and wasn’t one to pick at it like a mouse, so this just meant I sometimes made a pig of myself, which needless to say doesn’t need an audience.
The hostess started to hand us our menus but Alex put his hand up to stop her.
“I already ordered us bo
th the chef’s tasting menu when making the reservation.” He told her and I wanted to cringe at the thought of getting something I knew I wouldn’t like, for example oysters. Why anyone would eat something that just tasted like swallowing a mouthful of sea water was beyond me!
“Very good Sir, your waiter will be with you shortly to take your drinks order, here is the wine list.” She handed him the thin leather book and wished us a pleasant evening like a drone sucked of any personality. It made me wonder if she had to practice in the mirror before work or if she just woke up that fake?
“So the chef’s tasting menu sounds interesting.” I said taking my origami napkin from the table and laying it smooth over my dress.
“Umm?” Alex said taking out his phone again and frowning into it.
“Alex, is there something wrong at work?” I asked the same question I did all those other times.
“I’m sorry Catherine, I am going have to sort this mess out, it should just take a phone call… can you excuse me for a moment?” I wanted to roll my eyes and tell him to just get it over with but I didn’t. No instead I smiled and played a good girlfriend by saying,
“Of course.” He smiled at me and then rose from his seat. He came and kissed the top of my head and said,
“What did I ever do to deserve such a beautiful and understanding girlfriend?” It wasn’t a question I could answer, especially not considering what this girlfriend nearly did with her ex only a few hours ago. I shrugged my shoulders and gave him a smile I knew didn’t reach my eyes.
“I won’t be long, do you want to order a bottle of the Pinor Noir Copain, Tous Ensemble 2011?”
“Eh…the what now?” I said knowing I would mess it up royally if I even attempted ordering that. I could tell Alex wanted to be the one to roll his eyes at me this time but thankfully our waiter came and saved the day. Alex ordered his fancy wine and gave a nod when asked if we were ready for the first course. I wasn’t so sure I was ever going to be ready when the first course turned out to be…yep, you guessed it…
The Pentagram Child: Part 1 (Afterlife Saga Book 5) Page 16