by Nicola Haken
Shit.
They’re sisters. They’re actually blood related siblings and I’m keeping that a secret. Maddie has grown up practically alone and now I know she has family, blood family, right under her nose and I’m hiding it from her. I’m a selfish bastard. I can’t do it anymore. I love her – I shouldn’t be lying to her.
Maddie loves me. Maybe she’d love me more than she would hate Trudy? Maybe she would stay, for me? Not if she finds out what a lying, scheming douchebag I am though. I need to tell her before she finds out from someone else. I just need to find the right time. Wait for her to get settled in her new job perhaps – a week or so… that’s all.
Then, I’ll tell her.
“You know that shit will kill you?” Maddie said, sauntering up to my window as I pulled up in the school parking lot with a cigarette perched between my lips.
“So people keep saying.” I shrugged, took one last drag and flicked it out of the window before climbing out to wrap my arms around her delicious body. “I’ve missed you,” I whispered in her ear. It’d been a whole nine hours since I’d seen her. Dear god I really am a woman.
Maddie’s fingers found their way into my hair and she twisted and tugged at it fervently whilst she reached up on her tiptoes to kiss me. I wrapped my hands around her waist, grasping the fabric of her fitted white t-shirt and gently pushed her backwards until she was leaning against my car. Then I slammed my hands into the metal on either side of her shoulders. She was trapped. She was mine. I kissed her deeply, flicking my tongue against hers and tasting that intriguing sweet flavour which I discovered last week was ‘tea, two’ or tea with two sugars to the layman. Too soon she pulled away, her breath hitched and her cheeks pinked.
“I’ll see you at lunch,” she practically whimpered. She was visibly flustered and I felt rather smug I had the ability to do that to her.
“Damn right you will.” I leaned in for another kiss but she placed a finger over my lips, tutting like some naughty, hot as hell school mistress out of a cheap porno. Then, giggling, she ducked under my arms which were pinning her to my car and sprinted across the lot to catch up with Lori.
As usual when Maddie and I have no classes together the morning dragged laboriously. I slept my way through pre-calculus, daydreamed my way through physics and spent chemistry listening to Jason drone on about the ‘funny shaped flaps’ of his latest conquest. Then, just as he was comparing them with some blonde called Penny’s ‘neatly tucked away’ ones, I was saved by a text message. It was from Maddie.
Need to go home. Just called taxi. Call me when u can xxx
“I gotta go,” I said to Jason, heading straight for the door and ignoring Mr Bell’s attempts to call me back.
I raced down to the ground floor and then sped through the halls until I reached the double doors to the lot. Maddie was stood by the white barrier with her head in her hands, tapping her foot furiously against the asphalt. Within seconds I had my arms around her.
“Blaine,” she gasped in surprise, spinning to face me. “What are you-”
“Come on, lish. You’re not waiting around for a fucking cab when I’ve got a car right here.” She mumbled something which sounded like ‘thank you’ as I led her by the hand towards my car. After opening the passenger door for her and watching her slide inside, I closed it and hurried round to the driver’s side.
“What’s going on, lish?” I asked, concerned by the unshed tears burning the back of her beautiful brown eyes – Kara’s eyes.
“My mum. She called me – she never calls me. She sounded… scared. Then she hung up and now she won’t answer.” With that, I hit the gas a little harder. To a stranger I was sure Maddie looked calm and collected but I could tell by the speed her thumbs were circling each other as her hands rested on her knees that she was shitting it.
I parked the car with a screech and Maddie was flying towards her front door before I’d even cut the engine. I heard frantic cries coming from inside the house seconds after Maddie went inside so I slammed my door closed and ran towards the noise. My breath caught when I saw Annie huddled in the corner of the room with a hammer and Maddie stood over her surrendering her palms.
“It’s me, Mum. It’s okay, everything’s okay,” Maddie said cautiously, barely a whisper.
“No! No! No! You’re one of them! You’re not taking her from me! You’re not fucking taking her!” Annie screamed, shaking her head frantically from side to side and shakily brandishing the hammer. I rushed to Maddie’s side, pulling her back a step. She shrugged me off and crouched down in front of her mom.
“Mum, listen to me… its Maddie. Please, Mum, it’s me.” Maddie’s voice was cracking. I crouched beside her.
“You’re not taking her!” Annie yelled and before my brain had chance to process what was happening, Maddie was flat on her back with Annie hovering over her.
Instinctively I threw my arms around Annie, pinning her arms down by her sides and restraining her. She kicked and struggled and made noises which sounded like she was fucking possessed. Maddie broke into a sob and relief washed over me – she was okay.
“Maddie, call an ambulance,” I whimpered, straining to breathe after Annie managed to jerk a knee straight into my balls. Fuck.
“Let go of me you bastard!” Annie roared, fighting relentlessly against my hold. “You’re not taking her away from me!”
Maddie clambered to her feet and it was then I noticed a trickle of thick, dark blood slithering from her hairline and down her cheek.
“Jesus, Maddie, are you okay? You’re bleeding!”
“I-I’m… I’m okay,” she stuttered, tentatively pressing her fingertips to the source of the bleeding.
“Ambulance,” I reiterated, the strength in my arms wavering as Annie thrashed the shit out of them. I felt weak and nauseous after the kick - my balls throbbed like a motherfucker and the sweat pooling in my palms was making it difficult to keep a firm grasp on her wrists.
Maddie nodded, tears welling in her eyes as she reached for the house phone and dialled 911. I heard her mumbling down the line but couldn’t hear what she was saying over Annie’s incessant cries.
“You’re not taking her!”
“Annie, listen to me,” I said, surprisingly calm. “I won’t let them take her away. I promise, Annie, I’m here to help you… I won’t let them take her.” I tried to rationalise with her, even though I didn’t know what or who the fuck she was talking about. Her body relaxed instantly – her muscles giving up their unrelenting fight.
“They can’t take my baby. Don’t let them take my baby,” she whimpered, her body falling limp in my arms.
“I won’t, Annie. I promise.” I lowered her to the floor, cradling her in my arms. She buried her face in my chest and sobbed into my blue shirt. My fingers automatically stroked her short red hair and I shushed her like a crying infant.
“Mum?” Maddie asked cautiously, crouching beside us on the floor.
“Get away from me!” Annie yelled to Maddie, struggling against me once again. I calmly motioned Maddie to scoot back with my hand. She shook her head at first, resisting, but then I mouthed ‘it’ll be okay’ and she nodded.
“She’s gone, Annie. Nobody’s going to hurt you,” I whispered. She relaxed again and stuttered incoherent ramblings into my chest.
My arms ached to get to Maddie who was hugging her knees and shivering in the corner, but at that moment I knew she was safe – her mom wasn’t. If I let her go she could’ve hurt either herself or Maddie. I rocked Annie back and forth in my arms whilst we waited the painfully long fifteen minutes for the ambulance to arrive.
When they got here they kept their distance initially. Annie refused to leave me – she had formed some irrational bond with me. The crew didn’t push her. Instead they coaxed her gently with words, but then realising this was ineffective, the female paramedic with curly orange hair nodded to me as if she needed my help to get through to her.
I still don’t know how I did it.
I don’t know how I did any of it – how I knew what to say. It just spilled automatically from my mouth.
“Annie, these people are here to help you – just like me. You can trust them, Annie, I promise.”
“No!” she protested, “they’ll take her!”
I cupped her hands in my face, staring intently into her troubled eyes.
“I’ve told you, Annie, I won’t let anybody take her. You can trust me. These people are my friends – they want to help you. I need you to go with them. I need you to let them help you. Will you do that for me,?” A lonely tear trailed desolately down her cheek and she nodded.
“Yes,” she whispered. “I trust you.”
Annie loosened her tight grip of my shirt and slowly, cautiously I stood up. I held my hand out for her to take and pulled her gently from the floor before walking her over to the three paramedics in official black uniforms. My eyes flicked to Maddie who was now standing by the front door with her hand over her mouth.
“She’s hurt,” I said to the black-haired man, nodding my head towards Maddie. He nodded back and immediately walked to Maddie’s side, sweeping the hair which was now saturated with blood from her face.
“Can I go with her?” Maddie asked him. Before he got chance to reply Annie started screaming and kicking against the orange-haired woman.
“No! She can’t! Don’t let her come! Please! No!” She blared, shaking her head furiously and causing tears to spill rapidly down Maddie’s cheeks. “Him!” Annie said, pointing to me. “I want him with me,” she declared and then turned her eyes to meet mine. “Please don’t leave me,” she begged.
I looked at Maddie who was both sobbing and wincing as the paramedic grazed her bleeding forehead with his fingers. He said it looked worse than it was and should heal perfectly fine without stitches. I couldn’t leave her. She needed me, and as yet I couldn’t get to her because her mom wouldn’t let go of my shirt.
“I-I…” I didn’t know what to do. I had a mentally unstable, terrified woman pleading with me not to leave her and then I had the woman I loved more than my own life shivering and bleeding and needing my arms around her.
“Go with her,” Maddie whimpered. “Please, don’t leave her on her own.”
I nodded reluctantly.
“But I’m gonna call Trudy to come pick you up. She’ll take you to the hospital.”
“No, I-”
“That wasn’t a request, Maddie,” I deadpanned.
After jabbering a heap of incomprehensible technical shit to each other the paramedics said it was time to leave. The orange-haired one gave me a knowing nod as if she thought I knew what the fuck I was doing. I didn’t - but somehow I did it anyway. The whole thing was like some kind of out of body experience.
“Annie?” I said gently. Her unfocused eyes landed on my face and she gripped my shirt a little too tightly, popping off a button. “It’s time to go now. There’s an ambulance waiting outside and we’re going to get into it. I’ll be with you the whole time. Okay?” She nodded warily, her body shuddering with fear in my arms as I led her outside to the ambulance.
I mouthed ‘I love you’ to Maddie on my way past, the muscles in my arms burning to hold her. Then I supported Annie’s weight as she climbed the ramp into the back of the ambulance, sneaking one last glance at Maddie’s broken face before they closed us in. She was scared and alone and there was nothing I could do.
It broke my heart.
Chapter Ten
Blaine
“Blaine?” Trudy answered apprehensively, as if she wasn’t expecting to hear from me. Well, she wasn’t I guess – I should have been in school.
“I’m at the hospital with Annie. I need you to go and pick Maddie up. She’s at her house.”
“What’s happened?” she yelled in a panic. “Is she okay? Is Maddie okay?” Did she not hear me say ‘Annie’ was in the hospital?
“Maddie’s fine. It’s Annie. She’s… well she’s… lost it. Look I’ll explain when you get here, just get Maddie.”
“I’m on my way.” She hung up without saying goodbye.
Sitting alone in a small, oppressive room with puke-yellow walls, I waited impatiently for Maddie’s arrival. The paramedics gave Annie some kind of shot in the ambulance which knocked her clean out almost instantly. Her eyes keep haunting me. Every time I blinked I could see them – wide and afraid… lost. Jesus, she could have killed Maddie with that fucking hammer. In fact, I think she would have done if I hadn’t have been there.
My body juddered violently at the thought.
“Blaine!” Maddie cried as she burst through the heavy grey door. I’d ran over and taken her in my arms before my brain had chance to process my movements.
“Its okay, lish. Everything’s gonna be okay,” I whispered into her hair before pulling back slightly to examine the wound to her head. The cut was relatively small. The bleeding had stopped but it was already starting to swell.
“Where is she? Is she okay? What did they do to her?” she fired without taking a breath.
“Breathe, lish. Calm down and breathe,” I said softly, taking her face in my hands. “They sedated her in the ambulance. I’m not sure where they’ve taken her now. I’m told a doctor will come and find us soon.”
In that moment I noticed Trudy hovering in the doorway. She had her arms folded firmly across her chest, almost as if she was restraining them – stopping herself from reaching out to cradle Maddie.
Shit.
I didn’t think this through. Maddie was crying, shaking with worry for her mom whilst her actual mom was standing pained and alone in the doorway, unable to comfort her. Man, I felt like shit.
“I’ll, um, go and see what I can find out,” Trudy stuttered nervously, pointing out towards the nurses station. Maddie turned and smiled, nodding gratefully at her. But then, the second Trudy’s back was turned Maddie’s smile twisted into a scowl.
“Why did you tell Trudy?”
On reflection I had absolutely no idea.
“I’m sorry. I couldn’t think of anyone else. Besides, you’re going to need help with medical bills and shit. Trudy will take care of all that.” Maddie rolled her eyes as if she was suddenly remembering something.
“Right, of course. You have to pay for healthcare here,” she muttered glumly.
“It’ll be taken care of. You really don’t need to worry about that side of things.” She tried to force a small smile but it didn’t reach her eyes. “Why don’t you like Trudy?” I asked curiously and then wanted to punch myself in my stupid fucking head. Drawing attention to Trudy was the last thing I should’ve been doing. Maddie’s eyes widened briefly. I’d put her on the spot.
“It’s not that I don’t like her as such, she’s just… a little overfamiliar for my liking. I mean… I know she knew me when I was little and everything but she doesn’t actually know me. Yet she’s always all over me – hugging me, holding my hand, staring at me all longingly. If I’m honest it just feels weird.”
Christ, she had no fucking idea. Guilt gnawed away at my insides, reaffirming my decision that I would have to tell her soon.
“You know she’s really not that bad when you get to know her.” I literally choked on a laugh when I replayed my words in my mind. Was I actually defending Trudy?
“Since when?” Maddie asked, cocking an incredulous eyebrow.
“I don’t know,” I uttered, shrugging, “she’s been keeping my dad off my back recently.”
“She knows?” she shrieked, her expression twisting into anger.
“No, no. She has no idea,” I lied, “she just thinks she’s being nice, covering for me when I’ve skipped the odd morning workout and shit.” She nodded briefly, appeased.
“I’m scared, Blaine.”
“I know you are, lish. I know you are.” I pulled her into me and held onto her for dear life, resting my cheek on the top of her head of soft, chocolate hair. “But I’m here for you.”
Then I led her over to the clinical
looking, white leather bench seat and rocked her back and forth in my arms while we waited for news on her mom.
Maddie
It seemed to take forever for my mum to come round from her sedation, although in reality it was probably just a few hours. Blaine stayed with me the whole time – only ever leaving to fetch me cups of tea. He was so supportive – calm and understanding. He seemed to know just what to say and when to say it.
I was so scared when my mum didn’t recognise me. She was literally… mental. I’d always known how to deal with her before but when she didn’t know who I was I just crumbled. I was a crying, shaking mess. Absolutely useless. But Blaine just took over. He calmed her down. He held her like he holds me. He made everything okay. He was quite simply… amazing.
Resting my heavy eyes as I lay in Blaine’s lap on an uncomfortable leather bench I was startled by the creak of the door opening. Bolting upright my eyes met those of a tall, dark-haired doctor with designer stubble.
“Miss Davis?” he asked.
“Yes,” I muttered impatiently, nodding repeatedly like an idiot.
“Good evening, Miss Davis, my name is Doctor Anchor and I’ve been taking care of your mom this afternoon,” I nodded in acknowledgement before noticing his I.D. badge – Dr. William Anchor.
I shit you not.
W. Anchor.
Poor bastard.
“Is she okay? Is she awake? Is she normal? Can I see her?” The dishy doctor raised his hand, stuttering on the response he was trying to get out but couldn’t because of my incessant ream of questions.
“Yes, she’s awake. She’s still quite groggy but she’s asking for you. First however-”
“She knows who I am?” I interrupted, relief flooding my voice.
“Yes. She appears fully coherent at present, although she doesn’t seem to remember what happened before she was brought in. I have informed her to the best of my knowledge, which has left her confused and to be honest a little scared. You can go in and see her soon, but I would just like to talk to you about her history first.”