‘I’ll be fine,’ she assured him, fastening her seat belt. ‘I’ll be back as soon as I can for you and Ben.’
‘OK. But take care.’
Harry slammed the door because there wasn’t time to linger over his goodbyes. The sooner Jill and Ian reached the ambulance, the sooner they would be on their way to hospital. However, as he watched the car’s taillights disappear up the track, he couldn’t help feeling anxious. He couldn’t bear to think that Grace might be placing herself at risk when what he really wanted to do was to protect her.
‘Thanks, Janet. If you can phone the baths and ask one of the staff to tell Simon his grandmother is on her way to collect him, that would be a big help. We’ve just about finished here so we should be back at the surgery very shortly.’
Grace switched off her phone and stowed it in her pocket. Harry was having a final word with the crew from the second ambulance. Jill and Ian were already on their way to hospital and Ben would soon be following them. All things considered, everything had worked out extremely well and it was mainly thanks to Harry. She wouldn’t have managed half as well if he hadn’t been there to help her.
She sighed as she made her way over to him. Twenty-four hours ago she would have laughed if anyone had suggested that she would be glad of his help, which just went to show how much truth there was to the old line, ‘What a difference a day makes.’ Harry wasn’t just the self-serving glory-seeker she’d believed him to be but a damned fine doctor who responded well in a crisis. There was more to Harry than she’d given him credit for, and she wasn’t sure if she was comfortable with the idea.
‘That’s it.’ He turned and smiled at her as the ambulance drove away. ‘I’d say it was a job well done, wouldn’t you?’
‘I suppose so.’ She shrugged, not wanting him to guess how uneasy she felt about having to readjust her ideas. She’d learned through experience that the best way to deal with Harry was to keep him at arm’s length, but it would be far more difficult to do that if she kept finding things to admire about him.
‘You suppose so?’ He glowered at her. ‘We just helped to save three people’s lives. Now, that might not be a big deal to you but it is to me.’
‘Of course I’m pleased that Ben and his family are going to receive the treatment they need, but the day isn’t over yet,’ she retorted. ‘We have a surgery full of patients waiting for us so I suggest we leave the back-slapping until later.’
‘Don’t you ever lighten up?’
‘I’ve no idea what you mean,’ she said crisply, walking towards her car. Harry had left his car in the layby and she would have to give him a lift back there, although she could have done without spending any more time with him. As she knew to her cost, a little of Harry went a very long way.
‘Of course you know what I mean.’ He slid into the seat beside her. ‘You never relax, do you, Grace? You were the same at med school. When everyone else was out having fun, you were the one who stayed behind to study.’
‘You did enough socialising for all of us,’ she shot back, fastening her seat belt.
Harry laughed. ‘I didn’t go out more than anyone else in our year did. It was just some crazy misconception of yours that I spent all my time partying.’
‘Really, and what about all those women you dated? Were they another of my misconceptions?’
‘OK, so I had a lot of dates.’ He held up his hands. ‘But no more than any other guy in our year.’
‘Oh, come on, the list of your conquests was the stuff of legend. Every single guy on campus envied you.’
‘I don’t know why. At least when most of them asked a girl for a date, they knew why she’d agreed to go out with them. It was never that simple for me.’
‘What do you mean by that?’ she asked in surprise.
‘That a lot of the girls I went out with weren’t particularly interested in me as a person. It was the package they fancied more.’
‘The package?’
‘Uh-huh.’ He turned and looked at her. ‘What was the first thing you thought when you met me, Grace?’
‘What a stupid question. How on earth can I remember after all this time?’ she protested, although it wasn’t true. She remembered exactly what she’d thought when she’d met Harry because he had epitomised everything she disliked in a man—rich, handsome, sure of himself and the effect he had on a woman.
‘OK, then I’ll tell you what you thought. You thought I was a rich guy on the way up. I don’t blame you because it’s what most women think when they meet me. They don’t look beyond the outward trappings because they’re not interested in what I think or how I feel. They’re only interested in what I can give them.’
‘That’s a horrible thing to say.’
‘Yes. But it’s true.’ He sighed heavily. ‘Take that nurse last night, for instance. She wasn’t really interested in me. All she saw was a guy who wasn’t too hideous-looking and who had enough money to show her a good time.’
‘You didn’t exactly fight her off, though,’ she retorted, although the comment had surprised her. Did Harry really believe that the women he went out with were more interested in his financial status than him?
‘I know you won’t believe this, Grace, but I did not hit on her. Hell, I was too worried about Miles to think about anything else. She was the one who came onto me, not the other way round.’
‘But you still made a date with her,’ she pointed out, determined to restore some balance to the picture of innocence he was painting.
‘No, I didn’t.’
‘But you told Penny and me that you were going to find her.’
‘No. You both assumed that was what I was going to do, and I didn’t bother to correct you.’ He shrugged. ‘The truth is I’m tired of being seen as a commodity. If I go out with a woman from now on, I want to know that she’s interested in me, not what I can give her. I’ve had my fill of meaningless affairs and now I want something more. I suppose what I’m really saying is that I’m happy to trade meaningless sex for the chance of a proper relationship.’
‘Please, sit down.’
Harry waited while the woman took a seat. Elaine Ledbetter was his last patient of the day and he had to admit that he was glad to get to the end of the list. It had been an extremely busy day and he didn’t seem to have had a minute to himself since he’d got up that morning. No wonder poor Miles had ended up in hospital if this was an example of the pressure he’d been under recently, he thought as he brought up Elaine Ledbetter’s notes onto the computer screen. Although at least Miles didn’t have to suffer Grace’s constant nit-picking.
The thought of Grace was far too unsettling. Harry couldn’t help wishing that he hadn’t told her all that stuff earlier. He’d never meant to pour out his heart to her but that’s what he’d done. What had made it worse was that she obviously hadn’t believed him. Even though she hadn’t said a word at the time, he’d been able to tell from her expression that she didn’t think he was capable of having a proper relationship with a woman, and maybe she was right, too.
After all, what basis did he have for thinking that he had the staying power to commit to one woman for the rest of his life? He’d never been out with any woman more than half a dozen times. Usually, he was so bored by then that he couldn’t wait to end it. His friends often accused him of having a cavalier attitude towards women, but it wasn’t true. He always made sure that every woman he dated knew not to expect more from him than some excellent nights out—and in. His inability to commit had never been a problem in the past, but it would be different if he asked someone to share his life. He would have to give part of himself in a relationship like that and he wasn’t sure if he was capable of doing that.
It wasn’t often that Harry felt lacking in any respect and he didn’t appreciate the feeling now. He pushed the thought to the darkest corner of his mind and smiled at his patient. ‘I’m Harry Shaw. I’m standing in for Dr Farrington while he’s off sick.’
‘It’s nice to meet you, Dr S
haw. I heard what had happened to poor Dr Farrington—not that I was surprised, mind you. Dr Farrington and Dr Kennedy both work far too hard.’
‘It’s a very busy practice,’ Harry agreed, not wanting to think about Grace again. Maybe she didn’t believe he was capable of making a commitment to just one woman, but it was his decision, not hers. ‘So, Mrs Ledbetter, can you tell me what the problem is today?’
‘It’s my ears, Dr Shaw.’ The attractive fifty-year-old sighed. ‘I keep getting this horrible buzzing sound in my left ear. It feels as though there’s pressure in it, too—like when you’re on a plane and you’re waiting for your ears to pop.’
‘I see.’ Harry took the otoscope off the desk and stood up. ‘I’d like to examine both your ears. Have you noticed any discharge from either ear or pain that could indicate an infection?’
‘There’s been some discharge and pain in my left ear,’ Elaine admitted, pushing back her hair.
‘Right.’ He examined her ear, using the magnifying lens of the otoscope to check the ear canal and the eardrum. Owing to the semi-transparent nature of the eardrum it was possible to see right into the middle ear, though there didn’t appear to be any obvious sign of infection present.
‘That looks clear enough,’ he said, moving round so he could check her right ear next. There was no sign of infection in that ear either so he switched off the otoscope and sat down. ‘Is your hearing impaired at all?’
‘Yes. Everything sounds muzzy, especially in my left ear—it’s as though I’m listening to everything underwater.’ Mrs Ledbetter took a quick breath then rushed on. ‘My mother had Ménière’s disease and I’m terrified it might be that, Dr Shaw.’
‘Ménière’s disease can be extremely distressing,’ Harry agreed sympathetically. ‘As well as suffering from hearing loss and tinnitus—that’s the name for all those noises people hear in the affected ear—there’s the problem of vertigo. It can be very debilitating.’
‘Mum was really bad with it,’ Elaine explained sadly. ‘Sometimes the dizzy spells lasted for almost a week, and there was nothing she could do except wait for them to pass.’ She shuddered. ‘I don’t know if I’d be able to cope if I ended up like that.’
‘But you haven’t had an attack of vertigo, have you?’
‘No, although I felt a bit giddy when I bent down to put on my shoes this afternoon. Does that mean it is Ménière’s?’
‘It’s quite common to feel dizzy if there is something wrong with your ears. Even a fairly minor infection can disturb your balance so let’s not jump to any conclusions.’ Harry picked up a tuning fork and showed it to her. ‘I’m going to test your hearing with this. I’ll place it near the opening of your ear first of all, then do it again with the base of the fork against the mastoid bone, which is the bit just behind your ear. I want you to tell me where the sounds are loudest.’
He showed Elaine where he would place the tuning fork so that she knew what to expect then rapped the instrument on the desk. It emitted a high-pitched hum as he held it beside her right ear.
‘I can hear that,’ she told him.
‘How about behind the ear?’ he asked, rapping the tuning fork again and placing the end on the mastoid bone. ‘Is the sound louder or quieter?’
‘Quieter.’
‘Good. Now let’s repeat the procedure with your left ear.’
This time Elaine didn’t fare as well; she couldn’t hear the sound when the tuning fork was held against her ear, although she could hear it when it was placed behind it.
‘Why could I only hear the sound when the tuning fork was placed behind my ear?’
‘Almost all sound is heard by a process called air conduction. Sound waves travel through the air and the pinna—that’s the visible part of your ear—channels them along the auditory canal to the eardrum. Sound waves of different frequencies cause the eardrum to vibrate at different speeds and these vibrations are conveyed to the inner ear. They’re then converted to nerve impulses, which are transmitted to the brain.’
‘Good heavens!’ Elaine exclaimed. ‘I never realised how complicated your hearing is.’
‘One of nature’s miracles,’ Harry said, smiling. ‘The whole process is supplemented by a secondary form of hearing called bone conduction, in which sound waves set up vibrations in the skull bones that pass directly into the inner ear. This type of hearing affects the way you hear your own voice, for instance. That’s why you sound different when you hear a recording of yourself speaking on an answer phone message.’
‘So it’s not just because I’ve been using my telephone voice, as my daughter calls it,’ Elaine replied wryly.
Harry laughed. ‘No. You’re probably no more guilty of that crime than anyone else is. Anyway, the Rinne test—that’s the name of the tuning-fork test—helps us to determine if hearing loss is sensorineural or conductive. In a normal ear, air conduction of sound waves is greater than bone conduction.’
‘I see. It’s really fascinating to know how your ears actually work but I suppose what I really want to know is if you think I have Ménière’s disease?’
‘While I can’t rule it out at this stage, I can’t say for certain that you are suffering from it either.’ Harry turned to the computer and opened up the standard letter to request a hospital appointment. He filled in Elaine’s details as he continued. ‘It could turn out that you’re suffering from inflammation of the middle ear, probably caused by an upper respiratory tract infection. If pus has been accumulating over a period of time, it could be the cause of the deafness and other symptoms you’ve been experiencing. I’ll send a letter to the ENT clinic, requesting an appointment for you to go for a hearing test. The tests I’ve done are very basic and they will be able to perform far more stringent tests to diagnose the problem.’
‘I hope so.’ She sighed. ‘It’s the uncertainty that is worst of all. I know it’s silly but I just want to know for definite if it is Ménière’s.’
‘Of course you do.’
He finished printing out the letter and placed it on the desk, wondering if this was an instance when he should do as Grace had suggested and phone the consultant. After all, the patient did appear to be extremely anxious, and with good cause, too.
‘I’ll give the hospital a call tomorrow instead of sending them a letter,’ he said, making up his mind. ‘It might help to speed things up a bit if I try a personal approach.’
‘Oh, thank you, Doctor.’ The woman smiled at him in relief. ‘It would be awful if I had to wait months for an appointment before I find out the prognosis.’
‘I’m sure the ENT consultant will fit you in just as soon as he can,’ Harry assured her.
He saw her out then went back to his desk and picked up the letter. Normally he wouldn’t have dreamt of going to such lengths, so what had made him change his mind today? Perhaps it was the fact that he knew it was what Grace would have wanted him to do.
He sighed as he screwed the letter into a ball and tossed it into the waste-paper basket. Grace had made it abundantly clear what she thought of him that afternoon. Trying to impress her would be a complete and utter waste of his time.
CHAPTER NINE
GRACE was exhausted by the time evening surgery ended and the day still wasn’t over. She had promised Penny she would go to the hospital that night to visit Miles. She glanced at her watch as she opened the consulting-room door and sighed. There wasn’t going to be much left of the evening by the time she got home again.
‘Careful.’
She stopped dead and just managed to avoid running into Harry, who happened to be walking along the corridor at that moment. ‘Sorry. I wasn’t looking where I was going.’
‘Too busy checking how long you have left before the coach turns back into a pumpkin?’ he suggested with a teasing smile.
‘I wish!’
Grace drummed up a laugh, hoping it would disguise how self-conscious she felt around him. She had been stunned when Harry had announced that afternoon tha
t he was looking for commitment. The idea of Harry having a long-term relationship with a woman was impossible to imagine, even though he had sounded completely sincere. She knew he had expected her to say something at the time but she’d been too shocked. It was only after she’d had time to mull over the idea on the drive back to the surgery that she’d realised he would probably change his mind once he’d had a taste of monogamy—just like her own father had done. Men like Harry and her father were incapable of remaining faithful to one woman. They were genetically programmed to have multiple affairs.
‘There’s no chance of me going to the ball tonight,’ she said quickly, wondering why her realisation hurt so much. She knew what Harry was like and it was silly to feel disappointed that he would revert to type. ‘I promised Penny I’d visit Miles so that’s my evening accounted for.’
‘Mine, too.’ He shrugged when she looked at him in surprise. ‘When I phoned the hospital at lunchtime I just got the usual reply that Miles had had a comfortable night. I’d prefer to see for myself how he’s doing.’
‘Oh, but I’m sure Miles will understand if you don’t have the time to visit him,’ she protested rather too quickly, and he laughed.
‘Now, now, Grace, you’re not trying to put me off, are you?’
‘I was just thinking of you,’ she murmured without much conviction, because it was exactly what she’d been doing. ‘It’s been a busy day and you must be tired
‘I’m touched.’ He placed his hand on his heart and leered at her. ‘You do care.’
‘Oh, grow up, Harry.’
She stalked past him and made her way to the office to check that Janet had set the answering-machine before she’d left. They used an on-call service after surgery hours ended so any emergency calls needed to be redirected. Once she was sure the system was running she switched off the lights. Harry was lounging in the doorway when she turned round and she felt a little shiver run through her when she realised that he had been watching her.
‘I’m sorry, Grace. I didn’t mean to wind you up. I know you must be tired, too, so how about we go to the hospital together? I’ll drive so you can sit back and have a rest.’
The Woman He's Been Waiting For Page 8