‘No, thank you. I’m quite capable of driving myself there.’ She headed for the door then stopped when he made no attempt to get out of her way. ‘Excuse me,’ she said with icy politeness.
‘Do I take it that the ceasefire has ended and normal hostilities have resumed?’
‘You can take it any way you like,’ she snapped. ‘I am far too tired to play games with you, Harry. I just want to go to the hospital and see Miles, then go home to bed. Now, if you’ll excuse me…’
This time he stepped aside to let her pass. Grace didn’t look at him again as she hurried to her room to collect her coat and bag. By the time she got back, he’d left. She set the alarm then locked the doors and got into her car. It was usually a twenty-minute drive to the hospital, although it would take longer because of the snow, but she didn’t care. She needed some time on her own to calm herself down.
She wasn’t going to let Harry upset her, she certainly wasn’t going to allow him to disrupt the even tenor of her life. She had made up her mind a long time ago that no man would exert that much influence over her. Maybe she was missing out in some respects, but at least she wouldn’t have to suffer the heartache that followed a broken relationship. She’d seen how destructive love could be, had watched as her mother had changed from a confident, outgoing woman to someone who’d had no interest in life. Grace had sworn she would never allow the same thing to happen to her. Love might be wonderful while it lasted but it was hell when it ended. It was easier to remain single than risk getting hurt, even though at times she found herself wondering what it would be like to have someone special in her life.
Unbidden, a picture of Harry sprang to her mind but she quickly dismissed it. Harry was the last man she would want to share her life with.
Miles had been moved to a side room off the main ward. There was no sign of Penny when Harry arrived so he tapped on the door and went in.
‘You don’t look too bad, considering,’ he said, as he deposited the bag of grapes he’d bought on the way onto the bed. ‘Sure you’re not malingering so you can get some time off work?’
‘No way.’ Miles retorted, looking affronted. ‘I can think of better places to be than stuck in this bed if I was skiving off work, can’t you?’
‘Hmm, it’s not my idea of a fun time,’ Harry agreed, whipping Miles’s chart out of its holder. He glanced through it and nodded. ‘Looks as though everything is settling down now.’
‘I hope so.’ Miles grimaced. ‘It scared the pants off me, I can tell you. I honestly thought my number was up last night.’
‘And so it will be if you don’t do something about the way you’ve been living recently.’ Harry put the chart back and pulled up a chair. ‘You’ve been pushing yourself far too hard and you have to stop. You won’t help Penny or the baby if you make yourself ill.’
‘I know. I knew I was doing too much but it’s difficult to stop when so many people are depending on you.’
‘I understand that, but you have to think about yourself for a change, Miles. You need to take time out, the same as everyone does.’
‘It isn’t that simple,’ Miles protested. ‘The practice has expanded in the last couple of years. There’s a new housing estate been built on the edge of the town and a lot of the people from there have signed on with us.’
‘So hire another doctor or take on a third partner. There’s only so much that you and Grace can do in any given day.’
‘We have talked about taking on another partner,’ Miles admitted. ‘The problem is finding someone suitable.’
‘Someone who meets Grace’s exacting standards, you mean?’ He sighed when Miles didn’t answer. ‘I know you’re far too loyal to admit that I’m right, but you have to make Grace see sense. You two need help and she really can’t afford to be too choosy.’
‘She isn’t being deliberately difficult, Harry. It’s not easy to find someone who’s keen to work in the country. I mean, it’s hard enough to find a decent locum, let alone somebody who wants to work here permanently.’
‘I understand all that,’ Harry assured him, realising this was the opening he needed to come clean about his report. ‘I never got the chance to tell you last night but I’m working on a report for that new health service committee I’m on, about the problems rural GPs have to face. I’ve spoken to dozens of general practitioners in the last few weeks and they are all experiencing similar problems—too many patients and not enough staff to keep on top of the work.’
‘At least we’re not alone in this,’ Miles said dryly. ‘That’s some comfort, I suppose.’ He suddenly frowned. ‘Have you told Grace about this report?’
‘Not yet,’ Harry admitted. He shrugged when Miles looked at him. ‘I was waiting for the right moment. Knowing how Grace feels about me, she’ll probably think I’m trying to undermine the work you do by finding fault.’
‘Then don’t tell her,’ Miles said quickly. ‘There’s no point stirring things up when you two have to work together. You can tell her about the report after you’ve left Ferndale.’
‘I don’t know if I’d feel comfortable about that,’ Harry said slowly. ‘It doesn’t seem right to leave her in the dark.’
‘I appreciate how you feel, Harry, but it’s not as though you planned on this happening. You had no idea that you’d end up working in the practice, did you?’
‘Not initially—no. But after you told me about the problems you were having, I decided to volunteer my services.’ He shrugged. ‘I thought we could do each other a favour. I’d help you over a difficult patch and get some hands-on experience of the problems you’re facing while I was at it. I was going to suggest it to you and Grace last night, in fact.’
‘Only I threw a spanner in the works and ended up in here.’
‘Something like that.’
‘Well, I for one am more than happy with the idea.’
‘Good. Now I just need to convince Grace.’
‘And what if you can’t and she refuses to co-operate? It would make it impossible for you two to carry on working together, and then what would happen to the practice? There is no way that Grace can manage on her own.’
Harry frowned when he saw how agitated Miles was becoming. ‘I’m sure Grace realises that she needs help,’ he said soothingly, but his friend refused to be mollified.
‘I’m sure she does. But she could still refuse to work with you and that’s the last thing I want to happen at the moment. Agh.’
Miles clutched his chest—he was obviously having chest pains again. Harry went to fetch the nurse, who quickly administered a spray of glyceryl trinitrate under his tongue. The drug was a powerful vasodilator, widening the blood vessels by relaxing the surrounding muscles. It had an immediate effect on Miles, much to Harry’s relief. However, he knew that he couldn’t risk upsetting Miles again. As soon as the nurse left, he set about reassuring him.
‘I don’t want you worrying, Miles. You need to concentrate on getting better. If you feel it would be best not to mention the report to Grace then I won’t say anything to her at the moment. It’s not as though I’m intending to base my findings solely on what happens at your practice,’ he added, trying to square it with his conscience. ‘As I told you, I’ve interviewed dozens of GPs and they’ve all told me much the same thing.’
‘Thanks. I’d feel a lot happier if you didn’t say anything to her right now,’ Miles admitted, relaxing back against the pillows.
‘Fine. I’ll leave it for now. It’s not a big deal.’
Harry tried to sound positive, although he wasn’t happy about keeping a secret from Grace. She would be angry and upset when she found out and she would be justified to feel that way, too. Normally the thought of inciting her wrath didn’t bother him; he quite enjoyed their spats, in fact. This was different, though. She had every right to be angry with him for withholding information and the thought troubled him.
‘What’s not a big deal? It sounds as though you two are plotting something.’
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Harry glanced round as Penny came into the room. Grace was with her and he felt his stomach sink as he wondered how much of the conversation she’d heard. He offered Penny his chair, trying to ignore the look Grace gave him. She was obviously suspicious and he felt worse than ever. He wanted to tell her the truth but how could he when it might upset Miles again?
‘We’re not plotting anything, are we, Harry?’ Miles denied.
‘Of course not.’ Harry avoided Grace’s eyes as he edged towards the door, deeming it wiser to make his escape before she could ask him any awkward questions. ‘I’d better be off. I’ll pop in again tomorrow night to see you.’
‘He won’t be here,’ Penny announced. ‘I’ve just had a word with the senior registrar and he said that Miles can go home tomorrow so long as he promises to rest. They’re convinced that it was a stress-related angina attack.’
‘That’s wonderful news!’ Harry exclaimed. ‘Isn’t it just,’ Penny agreed happily. ‘I can’t tell you how grateful I am to you for stepping in while Miles recuperates. The registrar said that if he has the time to rest and avoids any undue stress for the next few weeks, he should be fine.’
‘I’m sure Grace and I can handle things at the surgery,’ Harry assured her, realising that there was no way he could risk causing another upset now. He would have to hide his report from Grace, even though he hated to think that he was deceiving her in any way.
The thought added to his growing sense of guilt. He quickly excused himself and left. However, as he made his way to the exit he could feel his deception weighing him down. Grace deserved to be told the truth, but how could he risk telling her when she might react the way Miles had predicted?
All of a sudden he found himself wishing that he done something to resolve the situation before now. Most relationships evolved over the years but he and Grace seemed to be stuck in a time warp. Was it his fault, was it hers, or were they both to blame? Were they both afraid of what might happen if they altered the parameters?
Harry stopped dead. He didn’t want to admit that it might be the answer but he couldn’t rule it out. He and Grace were afraid to stop fighting in case they ended up liking each other instead. Now that he had admitted the possibility, he realised that it explained so much. He’d never quarrelled with anyone the way he did with her, had never wanted to either. Hell, he didn’t care enough to expend that much emotional energy. But it was different with Grace, very different. When he was with her he felt more fired up, more angry, more…everything! What on earth did it mean?
‘Excuse me.’
Harry hastily moved aside when he realised that he was blocking the exit. He went back inside the building, knowing that he wasn’t in a fit state to drive right then. The café was closed, but there was a drinks machine in the foyer so he fed some coins into the slot and was rewarded with a plastic cup of tepid coffee.
He took it over to a table and sat down, wondering how he was going to sort out this mess. It wouldn’t be easy because he wasn’t used to dealing with his emotions. Usually he kept them firmly battened down but they seemed to have been running riot recently—ever since he’d arrived in Ferndale, in fact, and seen Grace again.
He groaned. Everything kept coming back to Grace, didn’t it?
Grace was crossing the foyer when she spotted Harry sitting at a table near the door. Although Miles had denied it, she couldn’t shake off the feeling that there’d been something going on when she had arrived. There had been no chance to pursue it while Penny had been there, but if Miles and Harry were plotting something, she intended to find out what was going on.
She changed direction and headed over to the table. Harry seemed to be lost in thought and didn’t notice her approaching. He jumped when she pulled out a chair and sat down.
‘Grace.’
‘What’s going on, Harry? You and Miles are up to something, aren’t you?’
‘What makes you think that?’ he countered, picking up the cup of coffee he’d bought.
‘Intuition? A lucky guess?’ she parried, not wanting him to suspect how anxious she was to get to the bottom of this mystery. ‘You can call it what you like, Harry, but I want to know what is going on.’
‘There’s nothing going on. Miles was just worried in case I did anything to upset you. He was concerned about what would happen to the practice if we fell out.’
‘And that’s all it was?’ she demanded, not sure if she believed him.
‘Yes.’ He shrugged. ‘I told him everything was fine and I hope I managed to convince him. The last thing we want is for him to start fretting about work.’
‘It certainly wouldn’t help in his present state. I know Penny made it sound as though Miles is on the road to recovery, but the registrar stressed how important it is that he should avoid any pressure.’
‘And worrying about you and me fighting isn’t going to help.’ Harry sighed. ‘We can’t go on like this, Grace. It’s ridiculous for two intelligent people to be at each other’s throats all the time. I really don’t know why we’ve let the situation continue for so long, do you?’
‘Habit?’ she suggested flippantly, because there was something rather too intent about the way he was looking at her.
‘And that’s all it is—habit?’ he said quietly, his eyes holding hers fast.
‘Of course. Why, what else could it be?’
‘I’m not sure. Maybe we argue because it’s easier to stick with what we know than let our relationship develop.’
His eyes were very blue as he looked at her now and Grace shivered. She wasn’t sure exactly what he was implying but the comment alarmed her. As far as she was concerned, she and Harry had never had a relationship of any description and they never would.
‘Or maybe we argue because we’re not on the same wavelength,’ she said, briskly discounting the suggestion.
‘You really believe that? You think we’re such opposites that we have nothing at all in common?’
‘Yes, probably,’ she said quickly, then wished she’d sounded more positive. After all, it was what she had always believed so why had she allowed an element of doubt to creep into her voice?
‘What about the fact that we’re both doctors? That’s one thing we have in common. And we both care about Miles and Penny, so that’s something else.’
‘OK, yes. We do have some things in common. But you have to admit that we are poles apart in other respects,’ she said defensively.
‘I don’t know how can you make such a judgement.’ He leant across the table and she could see the urgency in his eyes. ‘We have never sat down and had a proper discussion about anything in the whole time we’ve known each other, Grace. So how can you possibly claim that we have a completely different outlook on life?’
‘I don’t know. It’s just how I feel.’
‘Not very logical, though, is it?’ he scoffed.
‘Maybe it’s not logical but I know all I need to know about men like you.’
‘Men like me…What’s that supposed to mean?’
‘That you are exactly like my father,’ She shot to her feet, wishing he would just accept what she was telling him and let it go. But, oh no, Harry always had to win the battle, although he wasn’t going to win it this time.
‘I learned from an early age what men like you and my father are like, Harry. He too was charming, handsome, witty, but he had one major flaw. He was pathologically incapable of being faithful to my mother. And that’s all the proof I need to know that you and I have nothing whatsoever in common.’
CHAPTER TEN
GRACE regretted her outburst as soon as the words were out of her mouth but it was too late by then. Harry rose to his feet and she could see the shock on his face. ‘Grace, I—’
‘No. I don’t want to hear it, Harry.’
Spinning round on her heel, she ran towards the exit, uncaring that she was making a fool of herself. The only thing she cared about was putting some distance between herself and the man who had c
aused her to overreact as she had. She ran across the car park and got into her car, her hands trembling as she slotted the key into the ignition. She knew that Harry might follow her and the last thing she wanted was to talk to him after what had happened.
Tears welled to her eyes and she had to blink them away so she could see where she was going as she drove out of the car park. Fortunately, the roads had been gritted, which made driving a little less hazardous. Even so, she was relieved when she reached the turning for the village. Just another few miles and she would be home.
The thought had barely crossed her mind when the wheels hit a patch of ice and she screamed as the car suddenly spun out of control and careered across the road. There was a sickening crunch as the front bumper collided with a wall before the vehicle came to a juddering halt.
The air bag had deployed on impact so it took Grace a moment to free herself and open the door. She climbed out slowly, feeling sick and shaken as she realised how lucky she’d been. The front of the car had been crushed by the force of the collision, and if she’d been going any faster she wouldn’t have stood a chance. She could have been killed, and the realization, combined with shock, made her cry, great hacking sobs that racked her whole body. She could have died out here on this lonely stretch of road and nobody would have known about it. Nobody would have cared.
‘Grace. My God, are you all right? Here, sit down.’
All of a sudden Harry was there, his face looking pinched and white in the headlights. Grace didn’t have the strength to argue as he helped her to his car and sat her down on the passenger seat. He crouched in front of her, his hands gentle as they probed her legs then her arms.
‘I don’t think you’ve broken anything.’ He looked up and she could see the fear in his eyes. For some reason it made her feel a little better to know that he had been scared for her. At least somebody cared what happened to her.
‘Does it hurt anywhere—your neck or your back—anywhere at all?’
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