‘Good evening, Dr Grant. Are you here for a function?’
‘The local rotary club’s annual dinner,’ the older man informed him, slurring his words. He turned to Grace. ‘I hope you haven’t been taken in by all that caring, sharing rubbish, Dr Kennedy?’
‘I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ Grace looked at Harry but before he could try to limit the damage by explaining, the older man cut in.
‘This new health service advisory committee, of course. Dr Shaw has been doing the rounds of all the surgeries, asking questions and poking his nose in where it’s not wanted. He claims that he wants to help us solve our problems, but I think that’s highly unlikely, don’t you?’ He jabbed Harry in the chest. ‘I know all about your reputation, Shaw. You don’t give a damn about people like us. It’s the glory you’re after.’
He pushed past them without another word. Harry watched him walk towards the dining room, wondering if he should call him back and make him retract that statement. He did care—that was the only reason he had agreed to be on the blasted committee.
‘Is it true?’
Grace’s voice cut through the silence and his heart contracted when he heard the pain it held. He turned to her, seeing how pale she looked.
‘No, of course not.’
‘So you haven’t been talking to other GPs in the area?’
‘Yes, I have. But that doesn’t have any bearing on what’s happened between us, Grace.’
‘Doesn’t it? So why did you turn up in Ferndale in the first place?’
‘OK, I’ll admit that I wanted to talk to you and Miles so I could get some information for my report. I’ll also admit that, initially, I wanted to work at the practice so I could experience the problems at first hand. But everything has changed since then, Grace. You know it has.’
‘Do I?’
‘Yes.’ He captured her hands and held them tightly, praying he would be able to convince her that he was telling the truth. ‘We’ve changed, too, haven’t we?’
‘I thought we had.’
Her voice was so cold that Harry shuddered. It felt as though they had gone right back to the way they’d been when he’d arrived in Ferndale, and it was all his fault. He should never have allowed Miles to persuade him not to tell her about the report, never should have kept it a secret from her. He should have told her the truth from the beginning but if he tried to explain it to her now, she would think he was passing the blame onto Miles.
‘We’ve come a long way in the last couple of weeks, Grace,’ he said urgently. ‘Don’t let a stupid misunderstanding spoil what we have.’
‘I won’t.’ She withdrew her hands from his and there was something so final about the gesture that he could feel fear clutching his heart. ‘It’s the fact that you deliberately lied to me, Harry, that I can’t forgive. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to go home.’
‘Grace, wait,’ he cried, but she ignored him.
He ran after her but got held up near the door by a crowd of people who had just arrived. By the time he reached the forecourt, she was driving out of the gates. Every instinct was telling him to go after her, but what could he say if he did? He could tell her the truth, that he loved her, but he wasn’t sure she would believe him after what had happened. He had lost her trust and it was going to be an almost impossible task to win it back. The thought that he might not succeed filled him with dread but he had to try. He would do what he’d planned to do—go back to London, hand in his notice and find another job in the area. Maybe, just maybe, it would convince Grace that he was serious.
Grace spent the weekend locked away in her house. She didn’t even answer the phone in case it was Harry calling her. She didn’t want to speak to him, certainly didn’t want to hear any more of his lies. He had used her to further his own career and there was no point glossing over the truth with a lot of fine words. Oh, she didn’t doubt that he had enjoyed making love to her, but it hadn’t really meant anything to him. The fact that he hadn’t made any plans to see her after he went back to London proved that.
What a fool she’d been to fall in love with him. She had thought he cared about her, but there was only one person Harry cared about and that was himself. Well, she hoped that his fact-finding mission had been a huge success. Then he wouldn’t need to come back and she wouldn’t have to see him ever again.
She felt grey and listless when she went into work on Monday morning. Miles was already there, looking remarkably chipper for a man who had been dicing with death. They ran through what had happened while he’d been away then made a start on morning surgery, and as the week progressed, it was as though Harry had never been there. It was only the empty ache in her heart that kept reminding her of his visit. Harry may have left but he was constantly on her mind.
Harry handed in his resignation as soon as he returned to London. According to the terms of his contract, he had to give three months’ notice but the management team reluctantly agreed to take into account the fact that he had another month’s leave owing to him. He would leave at the end of March and he could hardly wait. The sooner he was back in Cumbria, the sooner he could prove to Grace that he was serious about wanting to be with her. When he saw an advertisement for the post of Clinical Director at Dalverston General Hospital, it seemed heaven sent. He went for an interview and was delighted when he was offered the job. Maybe it was sign that his luck was changing.
It was a beautiful spring day when he drove back to Cumbria. He had rented out his London apartment and intended to stay at the hotel until he found a place to live. So much depended on what happened between him and Grace that there was no point even thinking about purchasing a property just yet. He went straight to the hotel and dumped his bags then drove to the surgery, wondering what kind of a reception he would receive. He hadn’t even told Miles about his plans in case he told Grace, so it would be a shock for everyone when he turned up.
He drew up in the car park and got out of his car, and when he turned round there was Grace. Harry felt a huge wave of love envelop him as he looked at her. These past weeks had been a nightmare and he had missed her dreadfully. He wanted to rush over and take her in his arms, tell her that he loved her and had come back to claim her, but would she listen to him? And, most important of all, would she believe him?
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
GRACE could feel the ground rushing up to meet her. For one terrible moment she thought she was going to faint. It was only when Harry started walking towards her that she managed to pull herself together.
She stood up straighter and glared at him. ‘After for some more information for your report, Harry?’
‘No. I came to see you.’
He stopped in front of her and she had to physically restrain herself from touching him by putting her hands behind her back. She had missed him so much that she had wondered if she would be able to carry on. She had missed hearing his voice, seeing him smile, feeling his touch—the list was endless. She had lain awake, night after night, remembering how it had been when he’d held her in his arms and made love to her.
‘Don’t. I can’t bear to see you looking so unhappy, Grace.’
He reached out to stroke her cheek but she jerked her head away. ‘Stop it. I don’t know why you’ve come here today, Harry, but I’m not interested in anything you have to say. Is that clear?’
‘Yes. I understand why you feel like that. But you have to let me explain—’
‘Oh, no, I don’t.’ She laughed scornfully. ‘That’s where you are wrong. I don’t have to listen to you or see you if I don’t wish to do so.’
She brushed past him, shaking off his hand when he tried to detain her. She got into her car, forcing herself not to look at him as she drove out of the car park. She’d made a fool of herself over him once and she didn’t intend to repeat her mistake. Harry could stand there all day and all night and she still wasn’t going to listen to him.
He was still there when she got back
from the house calls, sitting in his car and watching her. He hadn’t moved when she left after evening surgery finished, but she ignored him. Miles was obviously delighted to see him but she got into her car and drove home without saying a word to him. She’d said everything she intended to say to Harry and there was nothing to add. He had used her and she, like a fool, had let him do it. What could either of them say to make this situation any better?
Harry felt as though he would go mad if Grace didn’t listen to him soon. As the week progressed, she continued to ignore him, no matter what he did. He tried parking outside her house in the hope that she might relent if they were away from work, but it didn’t happen. She came and went, and never even looked his way.
He tried leaving a message with Janet, asking Grace to phone him, but to no avail. There was no call that day or the next. Grace was determined that she wasn’t going to have anything more to do with him and—short of kidnapping her—there was nothing he could do.
By the time he started work at Dalverston General he had given up any hope of getting through to her. He threw himself into his new job in the hope it would help to blot out the pain. There was certainly enough work to keep him busy during the day, but at night, when he went back to the hotel, he couldn’t stop thinking about what he had lost. He had come so close to having everything a man could dream of, only to lose it again through his own stupidity.
Grace was putting in long hours at the surgery. Although Miles maintained that he was perfectly capable of doing his job, she insisted on taking over the extra tasks, like budgets and staffing issues. With Penny doing well and nearing the end of her second trimester, he didn’t really need to start spending more time in the office. She finally managed to find them another locum so that took some of the pressure off, but even then she didn’t let up. While she was working, she had less time to think about Harry and the mistakes she had made.
She heard on the grapevine that he was working in the area and although it surprised her to learn he had moved out of London, she refused to read anything into it. After all, Dalverston General was an excellent hospital and the post of Clinical Director was hardly a step down. Harry had seen the job as a good career move and the thought made her feel worse than ever. Not only had he managed to find sufficient information for his report while he’d been working at the surgery, he’d also secured himself a promotion.
It was the beginning of May when everything came to a head. Grace was in her office when Miles poked his head round the door.
Have you seen this?’ he asked, holding up the latest issue of one of the medical journals they subscribed to.
‘Not yet. Why, is there something interesting in it?’ she asked, her attention more focused on what she was doing.
‘It’s Harry’s report.’ Miles placed the magazine on her desk. ‘It isn’t the whole of it, naturally—it probably runs to hundreds of pages. But he’s raised some bloody good points from what I’ve read. He really did get to grips with the issues we face.’
‘Then it was worth his while working here,’ she said tightly.
‘It was.’ Miles sighed. ‘I feel really bad about swearing him to secrecy, Grace. It was a rotten thing to do.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I made Harry promise not to tell you about this report. You two were always at each other’s throats and I was terrified that you would take offence if you found out about it.’ He smiled guiltily. ‘Sorry. I should have had more faith in your professional judgement.’
‘You made Harry promise not to tell me?’ she said in bemusement. ‘But how? When?’
‘When he came to see me in hospital the night after I’d had the first angina attack. Oh, I could tell he wasn’t happy about leaving you in the dark, but I thought it was the best thing to do in the circumstances.’
‘You thought I would refuse to allow Harry to work here if I found out about the report?’ she said, needing to get the facts clear in her own mind.
‘Yes. I knew you wouldn’t be able to cope on your own, so it seemed safer not to rock the boat.’ Miles grimaced. ‘I suppose I should have mentioned it before but I never thought about it after Harry left. Sorry.’
He gave her a quick smile and left. Grace picked up the journal and read the article. It only touched on the main issues that had been raised in the report but, as Miles had said, Harry had done an excellent job. Nobody reading the report would be in any doubt about the problems rural GPs faced.
Grace closed the magazine, feeling sick as she realised how badly she had misjudged Harry. He had been genuinely committed to making a difference to people’s lives, as this report made clear. However, it was the fact that he had honoured his promise to Miles and not told her about it that caused her the most pain. She had judged his actions without knowing the true facts. She had allowed the old fears to surface, instead of listening to her heart, and she would never forgive herself for that.
She stood up. All she could do now was to try and make things right between them, although she wasn’t foolish enough to think that he would forgive her. Why should he accept her apology when she had refused to listen when he had tried to explain?
Harry was in his office when his secretary phoned to say he had a visitor who insisted on seeing him. ‘Ask them to make an appointment,’ he said briskly. ‘I have a finance meeting this afternoon and I need time to prepare for it.’
He hung up and reached for the file of papers then looked round in surprise when the door burst open. He stared at Grace, wondering if he was hallucinating…
‘I’m sorry, Harry, but I need to speak to you now, not in a couple of weeks’ time.’
Harry rose to his feet, shaking his head when his secretary tried to intervene. ‘I’ll deal with this, thank you.’
Grace closed the door and walked over to his desk. ‘Miles just told me that he made you promise not to tell me about the report you were writing,’ she said without any preamble.
‘Did he?’ He cleared his throat when he heard how hoarse he sounded. Grace’s sudden appearance had knocked him for six, but he had to pull himself together. ‘Is that why you’ve come here?’
‘Of course.’ She turned on her heel and marched back to the door then stood there, with her hand resting on the handle. ‘I owe you an apology. I’m sorry for what I said that night. It was unfair of me to blame you.’
She went to open the door but Harry knew he couldn’t let her leave. If she walked out of this room he might not get another chance to tell her how much he loved her. Just for a second his head swirled as the enormity of what he was doing hit him, before he grasped his courage in both hands.
‘I love you, Grace.’
He heard her gasp and when she turned he could see the shock on her face.
‘What did you say?’
‘I said that I love you.’ He crossed the room in a couple of strides and took hold of her hands. ‘I love you,’ he repeated, more gently this time. ‘I wanted to tell you how I felt before I left Ferndale but I decided it would be better if I had everything in place before I did so.’
‘In place?’
‘I wanted to prove to you that I was capable of making such a huge commitment.’ He squeezed her hands. ‘That’s why I resigned from my last job and accepted the position here. It would have put too much of a strain on us if we’d had to commute between here and London. I didn’t want to take that risk.’
‘You gave up your job for me?’
‘For us,’ he corrected her. ‘Our relationship means more to me than anything else. You mean more to me than I can tell you.’
‘I don’t know what to say. I thought you’d used me…’ Tears suddenly rolled down her cheeks and he gathered her into his arms and held her close.
‘Please, don’t cry, darling. I can’t bear it.’ He brushed her mouth with a gentle kiss. ‘I love you so much and it’s been agony, thinking that you hated me.’
‘I don’t hate you, Harry. I never did.’ She cupped his cheek in
her hand, her eyes gazing at him with a wealth of love in them. ‘I love you, too. I think I’ve always been more than a little in love with you, and that’s why I fought so hard to keep you at a distance for all that time.’
‘Do you mean it?’ he demanded, his heart pounding. ‘You’re not just saying that because you know it’s what I want to hear?’
She laughed softly. ‘When have I ever tried to humour you?’
He grinned. ‘Not very often.’ He drew her to him and kissed her with a passion that soon had them clinging to one another. Pulling back, he groaned in dismay. ‘Would you believe that I have a finance meeting in exactly twenty minutes’ time?’
‘Hmm, in that case, I’d better make myself scarce.’ She zipped out of his arms and opened the door.
‘Wait. You can’t just leave like this. We need to talk and—’
‘Definitely and,’ she murmured wickedly. She waggled her fingers at him. ‘I’ll see you later. How about dinner at my house? That way I can guarantee there won’t be any interruptions.’
‘There had better not be.’ Harry chuckled as he pulled her back into the room. He kissed her soundly, held her close so she could feel what her nearness was doing to him, then opened the door again.
Grace looked more than a little flushed when she left, much to his secretary’s amusement. Harry didn’t care. It didn’t matter a scrap what anyone thought so long as Grace loved him.
That thought made him float through the rest of the day. Before he knew it, it was time to leave. He drove straight to Grace’s house and parked outside, waiting for her to come home. As soon as he saw her car coming along the road, he got out. She opened the car door and stepped into his arms, and it was a homecoming in every sense of the word. He knew then that he was the luckiest man who had ever walked this earth. He had the woman he loved and he had the future to look forward to, a future they would share. Bending, he kissed her on the lips.
The Woman He's Been Waiting For Page 16