Falling in Love...Again

by AnonYMous

  “I have,” I whispered. It was the moment I had waited nearly five years for.

  Gary opened the ring box and something inside sprang out, like those snakes in the fake peanut cans. I jumped backward in surprise and Gary’s friends began laughing. Then, I realized that glued to the end of the spring bouncing in front of my face was a small white card that said “April Fools’!”

  I sat in stunned silence for just a moment, and then I pushed myself away from the table and hurried out of the room.

  Bill found me in the women’s restroom, sitting on a plush sofa bawling my eyes out. He was the only one who bothered to check on me.

  “I told Gary he shouldn’t do it,” Bill said. He sat on the couch next to me. “I told him it was cruel. I told him no one should ever be treated this way.”

  “So why did he do it?” I asked between sniffles. “Why did he humiliate me like this?”

  “He—I don’t know,” Bill said. “He’s always been like this. You know that.”

  “I should have known something was up,” I said. “I should have looked at the calendar. I should have known what day it is. I convinced myself that this would be the night Gary finally asked me to marry him.”

  Bill took my hand in his. He didn’t seem to mind that my hand was covered with tears. “I should have stopped him.”

  I didn’t know what to say, so I just cried some more. Bill wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close. I cried on his jacket for a good five minutes.

  Then, someone pounded on the restroom door and I heard Gary’s voice.

  “It’s time to go, Carol,” he shouted. “Suck it up and let’s head back to the ranch.”

  “I don’t want to leave with him,” I told Bill.

  “You don’t have to,” he said. “I’ll take you home.”

  “Thank you.”

  Bill extricated himself from me and moved to the restroom door. When he opened it, Gary stepped backward.

  “Hey, everybody,” Gary said. “Bill’s switched teams. He’s turned into a setter not a pointer.”

  “She doesn’t want to go home with you,” Bill said.

  Gary looked past Bill and saw me sitting on the couch, my makeup smeared from crying. “Her loss.”

  As Bill shut the door, I heard Gary say to one of his other friends, “Did you see the look on her face when that thing popped out. Priceless. I wish I’d thought to bring a video camera. We could have sent that tape to one of those television…”

  And then the door was closed and Gary had moved far enough away so that I could no longer hear his voice.

  Bill and I stayed in the restroom for another fifteen minutes or so, despite half a dozen women giving Bill dirty looks as they walked through to the lavatory.

  Finally, Bill helped me to my feet and I leaned against him as he walked me to his car. We rode in silence back to my apartment, and he walked me upstairs, opened my door for me, and then closed it behind us.

  We sat on my couch, and Bill held me again. He had one arm wrapped around my shoulders, and my face rested on his chest. Between silent sobs, I could smell the warm, masculine muskiness of Bill’s cologne.

  He used his free hand to brush my hair off my forehead and out of my eyes. Then, he lightly touched his lips to my forehead. “Everything will be okay,” he said. “Just give it time.”

  I’m not sure why, but I lifted my head to look into Bill’s eyes.

  Bill pulled away and said, “Carol, I think that I should leave now.”

  I held onto his hand as he stood.

  “No,” I protested. “Stay. Hold me. Hold me all night.”

  “I can’t. I might do something we’ll both regret later.” Bill looked down at me for a long moment. Then he released my hand and let himself out of my apartment.

  I sat and stared at the closed door for a long time before I finally put myself to bed.

  I awoke the next morning with the telephone ringing in my ear. I answered it groggily.

  “Well?” my sister asked. “Did he finally pop the question?”

  “No.” I told her what had happened.

  “That rat,” Donna said. “I hope he rots.”

  “That would be too good for him.”

  “Look,” Donna said, “you need to do something to get your mind off that creep or you’ll spend all day thinking about what happened last night. I’ll be at your place in about an hour. Do you think you can crawl out of bed and be ready to go by then?”

  “Go where?”

  “Shopping,” my sister said. “What else?”

  Shopping was my sister’s answer to every problem that ever presented itself to her.

  “Sure,” I told her, “I’ll be ready.”

  She made it in less than an hour, but I was ready to leave the moment she knocked on my apartment door.

  “Where are we going?” I asked.

  “The mall,” she said. “The good one.”

  The ‘good mall’ was on the other side of town, and Donna took her time getting there, stopping twice along the way. The first time we spent half an hour and seventy-three dollars at a going-out-of-business sale, and the second time lightened our wallets by thirteen dollars when my sister saw a yard sale in an upscale neighborhood.

  At the mall, we tried on shoes, checked the sale racks in six different clothing stores, bought a CD and some scented candles, and poked our nose into every store where my sister thought she could find a bargain. It was well into the afternoon before we stopped for lunch.

  “So,” she said after we finally found a table in the food court where we could eat the two-for-the-price-of-one calzones she’d purchased. “How bad was it?”

  “Pretty bad.” I told her in more detail what had happened at dinner the night before.

  “He always treats you like that,” she said when I finished.

  I shrugged. “It’s just Gary’s sense of humor. In a few days, I’ll think it was funny.”

  “You’re just making excuses,” Donna said.

  “Excuses for what?”

  “For him,” she said. She looked me straight in the eyes. “For yourself.”

  “Why would I do that?”

  “You’ve put five years into the relationship. You don’t want to admit that you’ve wasted five years of your life with that loser.”

  “Gary’s not a loser,” I protested.

  “Then what is he?” she asked. “He’s been milking the cow and hasn’t had to pay for it yet. Why would he start now?”

  “Oh, come on,” I said. “It’s not like that.”

  Donna took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Neither one of us had touched our calzones since unwrapping them, and she nudged hers with her finger before looking at me again.

  “I’ve held my tongue all this time because I thought you would either come to your senses, or maybe, just maybe, Gary would change. Whatever you and Gary had at first, it’s gone now. I don’t think he ever loved you. Maybe he did at first, but he certainly doesn’t now.”

  “Why would you say something like that?”

  “He treats you like dirt,” Donna said. “Last night was just the latest example. It should be the straw that broke the camel’s back. It is for me. If you’re stupid enough to let that creep back in your life, don’t ever, ever complain to me about him again. And don’t let him come within fifty feet of me.”

  I started to protest. “But—”

  “No more,” my sister said. “Eat your calzone before it gets cold.”

  I opened my mouth to speak and she shook her head.

  We ate in silence, not speaking again until we had finished and began to decide whether to visit the bookstore or the music store.

  Bill phoned that evening.

  “How are you doing?” he asked.

  “Better,” I said. “My sister took me shopping. That helped.”

  “I’m glad.”

  “I’m sorry about smearing tears and makeup all over your jacket last night. I hope I didn’t ruin
it.”

  “It’ll come out,” he said. “Even if it doesn’t, I don’t care. You needed someone last night. I’m just glad I was there.”

  “So am I,” I said, not realizing how much I really meant it.

  “Anyhow,” Bill said. “If you need anything, just call me.”

  “Okay.”

  “I mean it. Don’t hesitate, even for a second, if you need anything, anything at all.”

  “I won’t,” I told him. “You’ll be the first person I phone.”

  We spoke for another minute or so, and then Bill said he had some notes to review so he would be prepared for a meeting the following morning. He wished me a good night and disconnected the line.

  I sat on my couch for the longest time, just holding the phone. Less than twenty-four hours earlier, Bill had sat in the very same spot, letting me cry all over his suit.

  How very strange that he would do that.

  Gary finally showed up unannounced on my doorstep the following Thursday. I jerked the door open and stood in the doorway. “What?”

  He stepped forward, apparently expecting me to step backward to let him in my apartment. When I didn’t, he hesitated. “Are you still upset?”

  “Yes.” I gripped the door with one hand and had my other hand planted on my hip. “Why shouldn’t I be upset?”

  “It was just a joke,” Gary said. “All of my friends thought it was funny.”

  “Not all of them.”

  “You mean Bill? Bill wouldn’t know a good practical joke if it pulled the chair out from under him.”

  “Bill knows how to comfort someone who’s upset.”

  “Oh boo-hoo,” Gary said, anger beginning to infiltrate his voice. “He was just trying to take advantage of the situation.”

  “How’s that?” I demanded.

  “He’s been mooning after you ever since he met you,” Gary insisted. “He thinks you’re the moon, the stars, and the sun.”

  “He what?” I asked. I was caught by surprise.

  “Bill isn’t stupid,” Gary said. “He saw a chance to make a move and he took it. I told him it wouldn’t work. I told him you’re not like that at all, that you don’t like that sweet-talking bull; you like a man who acts like a man, a man who treats you the way you should be treated.”

  I stared at Gary, realizing for the first time exactly what my sister had been talking about at lunch the previous Sunday.

  “We’re through,” I said.

  “We’re not through until I say we’re through!” Gary shouted.

  “Wrong!” I slammed the door in Gary’s face and snapped the deadbolt into place. I was suddenly glad that I had never given him a key to my new apartment.

  I listened to my ex-boyfriend cuss and swear outside my apartment door and I worried that one of the neighbors might call the police if he didn’t settle down or leave. I closed my eyes and waited.

  When Gary finally gave up and left, I picked up my telephone and dialed Bill’s number.

  “Yes, Carol,” he said when he answered. He obviously had caller ID.

  “You said I could phone you anytime,” I said.

  “And I meant it.”

  I held the phone tightly to my ear. “You said I could phone you about anything.”

  “Anything at all.”

  “I need to talk to you.”

  “Should I come over?”

  I hesitated. “No. Just listen for a minute.”

  “Okay.”

  “Gary was just here,” I said.

  “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine, Bill, just listen for a minute.” The line was silent while I gathered my thoughts. “I told Gary it was over. I’m tired of waiting and I’m tired of how he’s been treating me.”

  “Yes?” Bill’s voice seemed to brighten in some barely discernable way.

  “But before he left he told me something, and I want to know if it’s true. I want to hear it from you.”

  “What?” The brightness disappeared just as quickly as it had come.

  “Gary said you were making a move on me Saturday night.”

  “I… no, not at all,” Bill said. “I wouldn’t do that.”

  “I didn’t think you were. I really needed someone to hold that night and I certainly gave you the opportunity to take advantage of the situation, didn’t I?” I said. “But you didn’t. You excused yourself. You left. Why did you do that?”

  Bill hesitated this time, and the silence seemed to stretch thin. Finally, he said, “I don’t want to do this on the phone.”

  “Then where?”

  “Not where,” Bill said. “When. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

  “But—” Before I finished the sentence, I realized I was speaking to a dial tone.

  I replaced the phone in its cradle and paced my apartment. Then, I stepped into the bathroom and checked myself in the mirror. I don’t really know why, but I touched up my makeup and brushed my hair into place. There wasn’t time to change out of my sweats, but I certainly thought about it.

  When Bill arrived a few minutes later, I opened the door and let him into my apartment.

  “What’s so important that you had to come here?” I asked.

  Bill took both my hands in his and stared straight into my eyes. “You were too good for Gary. He didn’t deserve you and he never would have treated you right,” he said. “And I’m tired of hiding my feelings for you. I think that I may be in love with you. Maybe I shouldn’t be, but I am. I didn’t say anything before because Gary was my friend, and I thought…well, I thought it wouldn’t be right to get between the two of you.”

  “So what do we do now?” I wanted to know.

  Bill placed one finger under my chin and tilted my face upward. Then he planted his lips on mine and gave me a deep, soul-touching kiss that set my mind reeling and my heart racing. I practically melted against Bill’s chest, and when the kiss finally ended, I let Bill hold me in his strong, protective arms for the longest time.

  The next day, I told my sister about dumping Gary. However, I didn’t tell her about Bill. It all seemed so sudden, and I wanted to make sure that I understood my feelings for Bill. I wanted to be certain that I wasn’t falling for the first white knight to come riding to my rescue, only to find out later that he had tarnished armor.

  Bill and I had our first date that weekend, and our second a week later. Each date ended with a kiss. Sometimes more than one kiss, but never anything more, and it wasn’t just me being cautious. Bill was being equally careful.

  Neither of us spoke to Gary again, and we dropped out of my ex-boyfriend’s circle of friends. After Bill and I had been seeing each other for six months, I finally spilled the beans to my sister.

  “You what?”

  We were shopping again and were standing between two sale racks at an upscale department store.

  “I’m seeing someone,” I repeated.

  She returned the too-small sweater to the rack and turned to me. She looked like a deer caught in headlights. “Already?”

  “For six months,” I explained. “We started seeing each other practically the moment Gary and I broke up.”

  “Isn’t that a little too fast? Are you sure that this guy isn’t your rebound man?”

  I explained how long I’d known Bill and how he had finally revealed his feelings for me. “And we haven’t been intimate yet.”

  “What are you waiting for?”

  I looked at my sister. What was I waiting for? What more could Bill do to prove how much he cared for me?

  “I don’t know,” I finally told her. “When the time is right, though, I think we’ll both know it.”

  For the next few months, Bill and I spent a great deal of time together, and we learned a lot about each other. I introduced Bill to my sister and received her seal of approval. Bill introduced me to his family and his co-workers, and we all seemed to get along. I felt comfortable with Bill, and I felt comfortable being a part of his life. I never worried about what he mi
ght say or do, and he never made me, or anyone else, the butt of a practical joke.

  Finally, I knew the time was right. I felt it in my heart, and I also realized we were fast approaching a milestone. I invited Bill to dinner, something I had done often enough during the year we’d been seeing each other, but this time I didn’t let the evening end with dinner.

  After we’d cleared off the table and washed all the dishes, I wrapped my arms around Bill and kissed him right there in front of the kitchen sink. He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight. His hands were still wet with soapy dishwater, but I didn’t mind the damp handprints on my rear.

  I kissed him and kissed him again. Then, I took Bill’s hand and led him to the bedroom, where the covers had already been turned down and the only light came from the street lamp half a block away.

  Then, I unbuttoned his shirt and pushed it off his shoulders. I pressed my hands flat on his muscular chest, feeling his dark hair tickle my fingers.

  “Are you sure?” Bill asked.

  “I’ve never been more certain in my life.”

  Then we finished undressing each other and fell into bed together. As our hands explored territory that was both new and yet somehow familiar, I realized how much I had come to love Bill and how much he truly loved me.

  One year to the day since the last time I had cried in Bill’s arms, I had replaced a bad memory with a good memory.

  Bill saw the tear and he wiped it away with his thumb. “Why are you crying?”

  “Because I love you,” I said. “Because I’m happy. Because…well, just because.”

  Bill rolled to his side and held me in his arms until he fell asleep.

  I was almost asleep myself when the phone rang. I rolled over and snatched up the handset before it could ring a second time.

  I heard Gary’s voice in my ear. He sounded drunk and angry. “You know what day it is, don’t you?”

  “It’s April first,” I said. It had been exactly one year since Gary had embarrassed me in the French restaurant and almost a year since I had realized that a man could actually love me for me. “And this year, Gary, you’re the fool.”

  I disconnected the line and then turned off the phone’s ringer.