“C’mon babe just calm down… besides no one can hear you, the Alpha is out and our rooms are sound proof. We know you want this, you just said you do and we want you too Angel can’t you see that? Can’t you feel it? Just let us mark you, then you will be all ours and nobody can take you from us…not even him.” Tyler growls in my left ear as he mentions Drake, I’ve never seen him like this and it really freaks me out.
Talon is now kissing and sucking on my right side of my neck while Tyler has started on the other side. I let out soft moans as they leave goose bumps all over my body. They know that I’m caving under their touch. I have to stop this now before I eventually do submit.
“I know you guys want me, I can see it but I don’t want it this way! I can’t do this to him Ty– Mmmm.” I moan as Talon rubs his body against mine, he lifts my legs and places them around his waist. I struggle against his hard body but I continue to push them away, I start shaking my head just to get their canines away from my neck.
“Talon get off me! I swear if you mark me I will never forgive you! Both of you!” I cry out loud. This is all too much and the tears spill out. I tried to be brave and hold myself together but I don’t know how to get them to stop and the thought of being taken without my consent sends be into overdrive as I start panicking,
They both immediately stop and I see their eyes clear, they have control over their wolves.
“Oh my God baby, I’m so sorry!” Talon says as he climbs off me looking distraught. Tyler also apologizes looking ashamed. Tyler tries to pull me in for a hug but I jump away from both of them I fall off the bed hurriedly and step away from them as they sit there shocked and sad that I don’t want them to touch me.
“You’re sorry? Didn’t you tell me the same thing last time? Generally, when people say they’re sorry it means they won’t do it again!” I shout at both of them as I wipe away the tears.
CHAPTER 32:
I walk to the bathroom and they seem realize I don’t want company so they don’t follow me. I close the bathroom door behind me then sneakily open the other door that leads to the twins’ room. Their curtains are still opened but there are no lights on in the dark room. I climb under the covers and climb into the warm bed surrounded by the boys’ scents, even after what just happened I already miss them. I’m not upset with the boys for what they did, I’ve seen it multiple times when wolves take control over the mind, I’m more angry at myself for enjoying what they were doing to me.
Before, I only had to deal with my confused feelings for Jax and Drake, now that I’m trying to get over the heartache that Jax caused me I’m starting to develop feelings for the twins. Ever since Talon questioned my love for Drake and Jax I’ve been asking myself questions. Do I really love Drake? These past couple of days I’ve been so preoccupied with the twins that I havnt really missed Drake as much as I thought I would. When I’m away from the twins however they’re always on my mind. Maybe I’m just trying to fill the void of Jax... I guess I’m just not used to getting attention from boys. The boys at my old school knew they weren’t getting any from me so they didn’t bother trying and they also use to sway in the direction of the stick figure girls, they wouldn’t know what to do with a girl with curves in the first place but I was okay with that. These boys drive me crazy and I don’t know how to control myself when I’m around them.
I’m such a hoe…
I’ve always liked the twins but I never really looked at them more than that because I was already too focused on my feelings for Drake and Jax. I guess because I’ve been spending so much time with them lately that only now am I noticing the flirty remarks and sweet gestures they both send my way. They obviously do like me but I’m with Drake and I need to start acting like the girl he deserves.
Every now and then I think about Jax and wonder what he’s up to, but I quickly toss any thoughts of him into that little black box in my head where I’ve hidden all the ugly things that have happened to me recently.
Right now the thought and memories of my time with Jax is sitting within that black box in a smaller box right next to the box that holds the memory of how Georgina treated me and the memory of how Drake hurt me that one night.
All these memories are hidden deep inside at the back of my mind because I know as soon as I start to dwell on all of them… I will feel all the pain that I'm trying so desperately to keep locked up. I know I’ll start to ask myself questions, like why wasn’t I good enough, why have I acted this way or that and eventually I will blame myself for being treated badly.
I snuggle into the boys blankets and breathe in both their scents. I close my eyes but I’m unable to fall asleep without them by my side. I hear the door to the bathroom open slowly behind me but I only hear one set of footsteps.
The bed dips behind me and the blanket is pulled open, a large warm hand wraps around my waist and I am instantly enveloped in Talons musky scent and his warm bare chest is now against my back. He holds me close to him as he leans over and whispers in my ear.
“I did it again baby, I’m so sorry. You’re just so fucking amazing that we want you so bad, please forgive me…please.” He begs as he nuzzles into my neck. I slowly turn around so I’m facing him and our faces are inches apart.
I look into his sad eyes as I speak, “I can see how hard it is when your wolf takes over, I’ve seen it a couple times before remember… but this can’t keep happening…even if I really want it too…” I whisper my last words as my eyes travel to his perfect lips. I can’t help but want to touch them, I slowly raise my hand and with my one finger I gently trace it across his bottom lip…hmmm so soft.
His wolf purrs at my touch and his eyes close. I’m still staring at his lips when he speaks, “Why can’t we be together? Why don’t you want to leave him? You don’t love him like you love us, you’re not in love with him Angel. I know it. Can’t you see how much we love you?” Talon blurts, I can tell by his quick intake of breath after he mentioned the last word that he didn’t mean to let it slip.
I smile and this causes him to relax as he looks down at me, I look up to meet his eyes and say, “I’m with Drake and even if I’m not in love with him , I have deep feelings for him that I need to explore and find out what it really is. He’s been there from the beginning and I can’t just throw him away like that. He doesn’t deserve it.” I see his face crumple at what I’ve just told him but it’s quickly turned into another smile as I whisper these last words, “I love you too Talon.”
“You love me? And Tyler?” he says looking down at me with a huge smile.
“Yeah I love you….and Tyler.” I say with all honesty and it’s true, I really do love them. I knew all along I had feelings for them but I know now deep down that I truly do love them as I look into his beautiful blue eyes as he wraps his arms around me. When I’m away they're always at the back of my mind and I feel at home when they're around. Although the twins take my mind off Drake when I’m here, Drake could never make me stop thinking about the boys.
My life couldn’t get any more complicated. I have feelings for FOUR boys? I feel differently for each of them but I certainly do have feelings for them. Maybe I don’t know what love is? Maybe what I’m feeling is just deep… like? No! It’s definitely love! Or what I think love is…if it isn’t? Then this is pretty damn close to love.
I continue to trace my fingers against his lips and his warm tongue darts out and sucks my finger. I internally moan because I am so turned on at the moment even though I shouldn’t be.
He growls as he lowers his head to mine, he’s leaning against me and I’m half way underneath him as I try move away from him but my head stops moving as it hits the base of the soft pillow.
He places his body above mine again but this time doesn’t let our bodies touch. I look up expecting to see his wolfs lust filled eyes staring down at me but instead I’m met by Talons gorgeous sparkling blue eyes. His arms are shielding me in so I have no choice but to look at his beautiful face, as he looks down at me
, I look him over.
His raven black hair is straight yet messy, falling off his forehead nearly touching mine he’s so close to me. I look at his muscled forearms and shoulders; the light from the moon shining through the windows highlight his hard muscles. I look at Talon taking note of his appearance and the way he portrays himself, I don’t know how I didn’t notice it before but he is definitely not a boy… Talon is pure man.
Everything about him is different to Drake and Jax, he’s more defined, more mature and more…masculine, Talon is absolutely perfect.
He lowers his head to mine then gently brushes his cheek against mine just like Tyler did the other day. It's something I only expected from Tyler because that’s just the way he is but now Talon has also done it to me. I know exactly what he’s trying to tell me even though I already know it…He loves me. He brushes my cheek a few times with his and I swear I can hear his wolf purring with contentment.
I lose the last little bit of conscience I have left , I don’t care if I have to deal with the after effects of what I’m enjoying now, I don’t care if the guilt eats me alive tomorrow, all I know is that I’m selfishly going to enjoy whatever is going on between us now and deal with repercussions tomorrow. Tomorrow when I get back to Drake I will let everything out, I will no longer drag him along and mess with his feelings when I don’t even understand what I feel anymore, I have to tell him everything. Let everything out.
The butterflies in my stomach are wild as I feel him lower his face to mine, he leans in for a kiss and I submit. I don’t give in because I’m scared of what he will do to me if I choose otherwise, I succumb because I want to…I know he likes it when I surrender and somewhere inside I hear a voice telling me to make him happy…so I ignore the conscience that’s screaming at me not to do this to Drake and I lean into the kiss.
I tremble as soon as he deepens the kiss, his lips are so soft and this tenderness is so unlike Talon. He’s usually rough and a take what’s his type of guy. I know he’s being gentle because he doesn’t want to hurt me or scare me away but that rough side of Talon is what makes me love him even more. I don’t want him to change for me so I decide to bring my bad boy Talon back.
I slide my hands up his chest and into his hair as I wrap my legs around his waist and pull his body into mine. I can immediately feel his excitement and it just makes it harder to break away from him. I hear him growl roughly into my mouth as I push my lower body into his.
His one large hand is on my jaw as he gently uses his thumb to push against my chin making my mouth open wide enough for him to slip his tongue in and I yield to to him once again as he devours me. As soon as I feel his warm velvet tongue against mine sparks shoot through my body and I moan out loud.
Our tongues intertwine and then he removes his tongue from my mouth but every so often he would slide his way back, I know what he wants and I follow through.
I tug at his hair roughly, causing him to give me a deep throaty chuckle which turns into a moan as I slide my tongue into his mouth and our tongues meet again. We continue to make out for a few more minutes before he starts kissing down my neck as I tug on his hair with my hands, he makes my body go crazy for him.
“You like it rough, don’t you babe?” he says through a husky voice against my neck as he kisses me all over.
“Only… with you… Talon.” I whisper truthfully out of breath, this causes him to push his body against mine once again making both of us groan out loud. I start kissing his neck beneath his ear but his smell just intoxicates me, I wrap my arms around his neck and nuzzle my face into the crook of his neck and breathe in that scent that I love so much. He stops kissing me then wraps his arms around me as he holds me tight against him and burrows his face into my neck.
“I love you Talon.” I say as I lift my head to look into his eyes. I move the pieces of hair that hang over his one eye and tuck it behind his ear.
“I love you too Angel…and I know this shouldn’t have happened but I don’t regret it. I know you felt it, what we have is real. You don’t love them. you love us.” He says looking deeply into my eyes.
“I don’t regret it either. I wanted this to happen as much as you do but it…it can’t happen again until I end things with Drake. When I get back I’m going to speak to him and tell him everything, I do love him but you’re right, I’m not in love with him. When I’m with you and Tyler and even when I’m not with you two, I want to be with you. I don’t know why I’m so confused between all of you and you all drive me insane but I just feel that this thing with me and Drake needs to happen. I love you guys, I don’t want to hurt you and I know you guys will always be there for me so I know this is hard what I’m asking you to do but it just needs to happen.” I say sadly to him.
“It’s okay babe, I understand….the fates have planned it this way. You still have a lot to experience in life and love. You will learn what it truly means being loved and how it feels when you love someone so much it physically hurts when you are not together. You will be ours eventually, you will see.” He says smiling down at me.
I think back to his words, the same words Georgina used to say to me. I kiss his cheek as he snuggles into my back and holds me tightly against him.
“Hold on a sec...” I say as I get off the bed quickly, Talon smiles at me as if he knows what I’m about to do but he silently adjusts himself on the bed to get comfortable.
“I’ll be right back, I just gotta get something.” I say going to the bathroom and shutting the door behind me.
I open the door to my room and tip toe inside. I see Tyler lying on his stomach clutching the pillow under his head. He’s not asleep, he's just staring out the window with a sad look on his face. I tip toe up to him and he immediately looks up to me.
He turns to his back and I quickly jump onto him and straddle him, I look down at him with a smile on my face, this causes him to chuckle and the mood immediately lightens.
My hands are on the bed on either side of his head while his hands are resting on my upper thighs. I’m looking down at him as he speaks, “I’m so sor-“ but I interrupt him by bringing my lips to his and I get the same tingly feeling I got when I kissed Talon for the first time. It was like I was waking up from a dead sleep….like I was truly alive for the first time and this is exactly where I’m meant to be. The feeling makes my decision to end things with Drake more certain.
His hands immediately glide towards my ass as he squeezes me into his body. I moan while he growls softly. I put my one hand onto the side of his face so that my thumb sits on the right side of his jawline and the rest of my fingers are under his ear, I gently caress his jawline with my thumb as I press my lips harder into his. I feel his lips part and I take the opportunity to slide my tongue to meet his…he tastes so sweet.
I rest on my elbows on either side of his head as we make out. I pull away from him and look at his dark blue eyes, “I love you Tyler.” I say as I kiss his cheek, then I rub my cheek against his the same way they do when they are trying to show me deep affection. Tyler seems shocked at my affections, I pull away to look at him and I see his eyes all watery.
That’s the Tyler I love… he doesn’t care if he exposes himself to me and it doesn’t make him any less of a man when he does.
“I love you too! So much! I swear I’m not sad, it’s just that….” he mumbles as he sits up with me still on his lap, he wraps his arms around my waist as he looks at me and speaks.
“The first time we met our mate was the same day she was killed, I knew from the moment I laid eyes on her that I loved her and the way she looked at me …she loved me too. Talon and I were so confused because not all twins share mates but we did. We never got to complete the bond with her and fully mate. When she died I thought I would never love again and I would never be loved the way your mate would love you. But now…you came and…I can’t get you out of my head. I love you Angel….I love you so so much.” He says as he looks at me and smiles as the tears tremble down his cheeks. I wipe
his tears away then kiss his cheeks where the tears where. I wrap my arms around him and give him another big kiss then I pull away slowly. He brings his cheek to mine and I know what he’s about to do and I let him.
“Why do you guys do that?” I giggle as he removes his cheek from mine.
“It’s our wolf, the gentle touch of your skin comforts them, he’s trying to show you how much he cares for you and appreciates you.” Tyler says and I smile.
“It’s okay Angel, Talon already told me that this won’t happen again until things end with Drake and I understand… we both do. It's all meant to happen this way and we should let everything fall in place the way Fate meant for it. You will soon realize who you’re meant to be with and we don’t want to make that decision for you. Only you can….” Tyler says full of understanding.
“You’re right. You know I have to tell him though, I know if I keep it from him, the guilt will eat me alive and I don’t want to lie to him anymore so I’m just going to tell him about the kisses. He at least deserves that much.” I tell him and he nods in agreement.
“Come…” Tyler says as he takes my hand and leads me to their room. Talon is already sleeping on his side facing the middle. I gently climb under the covers and cuddle into him with my back against him, Tyler still has that smile on his face. Talon instantly wraps his arm around me and pulls my body into his. I wrap my one arm over Tyler’s chest and he picks up my hand and kisses it.
CHAPTER 33:
Today is Thursday and I leave to spend the weekend at Point Bright, I’ve arranged with Drake and Ronny that I will be staying at Georgina’s place. I don’t want to be stuck at their house all day while they have school on Friday, I also don’t want to be in the room opposite Jax or anywhere near him…I haven’t told them that part though. I don’t know how long I’m staying but I guess that all depends on how well Drake takes my revelations.
Alexia Eden Page 26