The Dating Game

by Natalie Standiford

  Lina had borrowed her mother’s perfume, just in case Dan somehow stood close to her. Maybe he’d catch a whiff of the sophisticated scent and it would stay with him, haunting him, making him think of Lina in a new way.…

  “Hi, girls.” There he was. Dan stood by the door, welcoming the kids as they entered the auditorium. He wore his usual suit and skinny tie, dressed up with a porkpie hat. “You both look great.”

  Lina felt her face flame. She knew he was saying it in a general way to both her and Mads. But still his words had an effect on her—she couldn’t help it.

  “Thanks,” she said.

  “Have a good time tonight,” he said. The girls walked in. He stayed at the door to greet more kids. Music was blasting but nobody was dancing yet.

  “Let’s get a drink,” Mads said, and they made a beeline for the soda table. It was something to do. They got sodas and leaned against a wall, watching and waiting to see how the chips would fall as the kids settled in.

  Lina’s eyes kept wandering back to Dan at the door. How did he treat everyone? Pretty evenly, it seemed. But he must like some students more than others, must have some secret signal he gives out to show it, even if he isn’t aware of it.… Ugh, in came Ramona, with Siobhan, Chandra, and Maggie. They were in full vampire makeup, black hair streaked with temporary red stripes, towering black lace-up boots and gauzy Stevie Nicks dresses. They fluttered around Dan like moths, pretending to cast some kind of witchy spell on him. He laughed and played along. Just being nice, probably. Then they scurried out to the dance floor, the first ones to start dancing, all together in a circle, twirling and spinning as if caught up in some kind of secret ecstasy. God, they bugged Lina. They acted as if they knew something no one else did, as if they had a secret wisdom or knowledge. But Lina suspected—no, knew—it was just an act, a way to make themselves feel special. Underneath the costumes and hair dye and cakey makeup they were just regular doofuses like everybody else.

  “Hey.” Mads nudged her. “There’s Holly and Rob.”

  Holly looked so pretty in her form-fitting knit dress and knee-high boots, her heavy hair piled up messily on top of her head, that Mads regretted her selfish tantrum about driving.

  Holly waved and left Rob for a minute to greet them. “You guys look so cute!” she said.

  “How’s it going?” Lina asked, meaning the date with Rob.

  “No glitches yet,” Holly said. “We just got here. If somebody besides the four witches would dance, maybe we would, too. You should come dance with us!”

  “No,” Mads said. “This is like a first date for you. We’ll wait until you’re a well-established couple, then we’ll barge in on you.”

  “Don’t worry about us,” Lina said. “Go!”

  Holly glowed. She trotted back to Rob. They went to the drink table for sodas.

  Lina and Mads checked out the chaperones, clustered in two clumps near the door and the drink table. “There’s Mildew,” Mads said, “the snooze machine. Look what she’s wearing.”

  The stout Ms. Weymouth wore a bright-orange flowered caftan and a lei made of plastic flowers. She was droning in the ear of Frank Welling, the art teacher, who was dressed according to theme in a puffy ski outfit.

  “What do you think they’re talking about?” Mads said. Ms. Weymouth and Mr. Welling seemed to have nothing in common—except, of course, that they both taught at Rosewood. And their last names started with W.

  “Maybe she’s flirting with him,” Lina said. “Or trying to pick him up! Like, ‘Oh, Frank, meet me in the woods behind the gym. Make passionate love to me, Frank!’”

  Mads laughed. “Yeah, and he’s saying, ‘Will do, Mildew. Just give me a few minutes to shoot myself in the head first.’ Isn’t she married?”

  “I don’t know. Probably.”

  “It’s funny that the chaperones don’t bring dates to the dance,” Mads said. “You know, so they’d have somebody to dance with.”

  “I don’t see why they can’t dance with students,” Lina said.

  “I bet you don’t,” Mads said.

  Mademoiselle Barker, a slender, pretty young French teacher with sleek, short dark hair and a fringe along her forehead too short to call bangs, twirled across the room to the door and started talking to Dan. She took his hand and danced a few steps in front of him, hips swaying, while he stood rooted in place and laughed.

  She’s not married, Lina thought. If she were, we’d call her Madame.

  Mlle. Barker did another skirt-flying spin and gave up on Dan for the moment. A new song played and a group of football players stormed the dance floor, stomping their feet and clapping. Must have been some anthem they warmed up to in the locker room before games.

  Mads suddenly pinched Lina’s upper arm, then tightened her grip. “Sean’s here,” she whispered.

  “Ow.” Lina yanked her arm away. Sean walked in with his friends Alex Sipress, Barton Mitchell, and Mo Basri. Sean had his arm around a pretty girl Lina didn’t recognize. She was tall and blond with long bangs that nearly hid her large, black-lined eyes. She was wearing jeans and boots and a too-small military jacket over a tight t-shirt. She looked as if she hadn’t planned on going to a dance at all, which of course made her the hippest girl in the room. She was too cool to go to a school dance; this was just a lark for her, on the way to bigger and better things.

  “Who’s that?” Mads asked.

  “Maybe it’s Sean’s sister,” Lina said.

  “Sean doesn’t have a sister,” Mads said. “And don’t say cousin. She’s obviously not his cousin either.”

  Sean swung the girl around until she was dizzy, then pulled her tightly against him and kissed her on the mouth.

  “Guess she goes to another school,” Lina said. Or college. The girl had to be at least eighteen.

  Mads stared at them, scowling. How could she ever compete with a girl like that? No matter what Mads did, no matter how sophisticated she tried to be, she’d never be that cool. It was like trying to compete with a movie star—so impossible, so depressing, Mads couldn’t even hold the thought in her mind. She let it fly away and returned to her usual state of ditzy optimism.

  “So Sean has a date,” Mads said. “It’s not as if I didn’t expect it. I’m in this for the long haul.” She aimed her laser vision at Sean’s friends: Alex, Barton, and Mo.

  “Alex is the cutest,” Lina said.

  “I concur,” Mads said. “Alex it is. I’ll hook up with Sean’s friend. He’ll have to notice that. It may take some time to maneuver from Alex to Sean, but at least step one will be accomplished: Sean will realize that I am not a little kid. If I’m mature enough to be with his friend Alex, then I’m mature enough to be with him.”

  Mads presented herself to Lina for inspection. Everything checked out okay. “Go get him,” Lina said.

  “Hey, Lina.” Walker slouched up to her in his coolguy way. “Want to dance?”

  Lina glanced at Mads, who practically pushed her onto the dance floor. “Mads, why don’t you dance with us?” Lina said.

  “Yeah, Mads,” Walker said, taking both girls’ hands and leading them onto the floor. “Come on. I love this song.”

  The three of them danced together to OutKast. Mads maneuvered their group to be near Sean. The dance floor was crowded now, everybody dancing whether they had a partner or not, but Sean was definitely dancing with the blond girl.

  Mads turned away from Lina and found herself face-to-face with Alex. He grinned, grabbed her hand, and twirled her around. Mads laughed, delighted. The OutKast song segued into the Neptunes, and Alex didn’t let Mads go. Mads did her sexy shimmy, and Alex laughed.

  They kept going, song after song, until Mads didn’t know where Holly or Lina were, or even Sean. She and Alex were in their own little dance world, hot and sweaty. Just as Mads was getting thirsty and thinking of stopping for a drink, a pale face framed by a pageboy haircut popped into her field of vision. Yucky Gilbert.

  “Aauugh!” Mads screamed.
<
br />   “Hi, Madison!” Gilbert was looking his yuckiest in a pea-green knit shirt that emphasized his sallow skin tone.

  Alex elbowed Gilbert away. “Dude, we’re dancing here.” Thank god for Alex. Mads thought she could fall in love with him for that gesture alone.

  She danced on, afraid to stop for a drink now. It might give Gilbert an opening and Alex a chance to leave. She tried to shut Gilbert out, but he kept buzzing around her, arms and legs flailing. One of his arms flew up and accidentally slapped the back of her head.

  “Ow!” Mads cried, rubbing her head.

  “Do you know this guy?” Alex asked.

  “Not really,” Mads said. “Gilbert, leave us alone!”

  “May I cut in?” he asked, so beyond getting the hint that a steamroller couldn’t have stopped him. He placed himself between Mads and Alex and let his arms and legs flap around like noodles.

  Mads gave up. “Want to get something to drink?” she asked Alex.

  “Yeah.”

  They walked away, leaving Gilbert dancing by himself for a few seconds. When he realized he’d been abandoned, he followed them to the drink table. He took a flask from his jacket pocket and waved it under Mads’ nose. “Irish up your Sprite, Mads?” he offered, unscrewing the top of the flask. “I’ve got melon liqueur in here. I wanted vodka but my mom only drinks melon liqueur. She puts it in her diet smoothies.”

  “No, thanks.” Alex’s eyes were scanning the room. His attention was straying. No! She had to keep him interested. She had to get rid of Gilbert.

  At the other end of the auditorium, Mr. Welling and some social committee kids were setting up a pizza table. A long line of kids had already formed, waiting for slices.

  “Why don’t you go get us some pizza, Gilbert?” Mads asked. That ought to keep him busy for a while. The line was growing fast. Maybe she and Alex could slip away before he came back.

  “Okay, Madison,” Gilbert said. “Whatever you like. Hey, they’ve got garlic knots. Do you like garlic knots?”

  “Sure, whatever,” Mads said. “Just hurry up and get in line before it gets too long.”

  Gilbert bounded away. Mads breathed a sigh of relief. He turned and waved at her from the end of the line.

  Alex touched Mads’ back. She took that as an encouraging sign.

  “Can we get out of here for a little while?” Mads asked.

  “Sure,” Alex said. “Let’s go out to my car.”

  “Perfect.” Gilbert would never find them there. Well, knowing Gilbert, he might, but at least it would take a while.

  She and Alex left the auditorium. Lina saw them slip away. She checked on Holly and Rob, still dancing like crazy. Lina wished she felt more like dancing. But it was hard to have fun at a dance when your friends were preoccupied and the one you love was so near but still out of reach.

  “Feel like some pizza?” Walker asked her.

  “No, thanks,” Lina said. Walker was nice, she knew that. But somehow she just couldn’t manage to focus on him. She danced with him, she listened to him talk, but she kept half an eye on Dan. She watched Dan carry a stack of empty pizza boxes to the trash. She turned her attention back to the dance floor. All those squirming bodies, the flashing lights, the loud music, suddenly made her feel dizzy and disoriented.

  “I have to go to the bathroom,” she told Walker. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

  She slipped out and stood in the silent hallway, leaning against the cool tile wall. What was wrong with her? Why couldn’t she just let go and have a good time?

  The auditorium door pushed open, and a blast of noise rushed out into the hall and hushed again as the door swung shut. Lina glanced over. Dan stepped out, saw her, and smiled.

  “Hey,” he said, walking over to her. He leaned against the wall as she did, patting a pocket in his jacket. “Thought I might sneak out for a smoke, but I guess you caught me.”

  “I won’t tell anyone,” Lina said. At the sight of him her heart started racing and her mind fogged. She struggled to keep it clear so she wouldn’t say anything stupid.

  “What are you doing out here?” Dan asked. “I saw you dancing earlier. Looked like you were having fun.”

  “Not really,” Lina said. “I mean, yeah. I don’t know. I just needed to take a break.”

  “I know what you mean.” He pulled a cigarette from his pocket, rolled it between his fingers, and put it back. “I hated dances when I was in high school. I always felt like such a dork. I couldn’t dance at all. Still can’t.”

  Lina smiled, but she couldn’t help wondering in alarm if he thought she was a dork too. Maybe he liked dorks. No, don’t be stupid, she told herself. Nobody likes dorks.

  “I guess I’m just not in the mood for a dance tonight,” she said. “I didn’t know you smoked.”

  “Every once in a while,” he said. “I don’t know, maybe it’s just an excuse to get out of there for a few minutes.” He gave a small, conspiratorial laugh, as if the two of them were in this together, refugees from the dance from hell. That little laugh made Lina so happy she wanted to throw her head back and yelp.

  A shriek and high-pitched giggling echoed down the hallway. Autumn, Rebecca, and Claire were on their way back from the bathroom. They dropped their voices and glanced at Lina and Dan as they skipped past them and burst through the auditorium doors. The music blared and faded again.

  “Well, guess I better get back in there,” Dan said. “Maybe I’ll skip the smoke. Don’t want to get into trouble.”

  “Okay.” Lina didn’t know what else to say. She tried to come up with something witty or profound but her mind let her down as usual. She pressed the toe of her boot into the buffed, shiny floor.

  “But you’re all right, right?” Dan asked, pushing away from the wall. “I mean, nothing’s wrong, is it?”

  “No!” Lina shook her head with too much animation. “I’m fine. Really. I was just about to go back inside, too. I was just, you know, standing here for a minute.…”

  “Okay. Good. Well, see you in there.” Dan tipped the rim of his porkpie hat to her and went back to the dance. Lina closed her eyes and pressed the back of her head against the wall. Oh my god. How could he be so charming? It was killing her!

  She wished Mads would come back. She had to tell somebody about what had just happened. She needed to analyze every detail of this encounter, the meaning of every word and gesture. He was worried about her! He wanted to make sure he was okay! It was amazing!

  Was he flirting with her? Was he sending her a signal? Lina still couldn’t believe he had even noticed her enough to be concerned. Maybe he’d been watching her all night! He said he was watching her dance! Oh my god! Lina could hardly contain herself. She didn’t see how she could go back in there and keep up the charade of polite interest with Walker now. But what else could she do? She ran down the hall to the bathroom. Then she ran back to the auditorium. She was going to grab Holly, just for a few minutes, and drag her into the bathroom with her. She had to tell somebody!

  “Hey, Safran, having a good time?” Jake, trailed by two of his soccer buddies and a couple of girls, found Holly and Rob perched on the lip of the stage. They were taking a break, drinking sodas, watching the dancers.

  “‘Cause if you’re not having fun now, you will later,” Jake said in an obnoxious, insinuating tone. “Am I right? Huh?”

  Just the sight of Jake left a sour taste in Holly’s mouth. How could she ever have liked him? He was such a thug!

  “How would you know, Jake?” Holly snapped. “Your idea of a good time is sitting home kissing your pillow.”

  “You had a pretty good time with me a couple of weeks ago,” Jake said. “You couldn’t get enough.”

  Holly couldn’t believe his nerve, lying right to her face! When he knew that she knew the truth. He must have thought she’d be too intimidated to contradict him. He thought wrong.

  “Funny, Jake, I don’t remember that,” Holly said. “But then, it’s hard for me to know what y
ou see in your dreams!”

  “Zing!” someone shouted.

  Rob took Holly’s hand and led her away. “Come on,” he said. “Before you two start scratching each other’s eyes out.”

  “That ought to shut him up,” Holly muttered. She forgot all about her Boobmeister rep when she was with Rob—and then Jake had to throw it back in her face. And in Rob’s face. She wondered what Rob really thought of her. Did he believe her—or did he believe Jake?

  “Holly!” Lina ran up to them, her eyes shining. “Come to the bathroom with me.”

  Holly glanced at Rob. Obviously Lina had something to share that was not for male ears.

  “Go,” Rob said. “Before Jake comes around asking for more punishment.”

  Lina looked confused, so Holly said, “I’ll tell you mine after you tell me yours.”

  “Deal.”

  “Where’d you learn to dance like that?” Alex asked. Mads sat with him in the front seat of his Toyota. He was holding her hand and rubbing it gently with his thumb.

  “Do you like it?” Mads asked. “Or do you think it’s goofy?” Mads knew her dancing style could be a little over-the-top, but she wasn’t bad at it. She could dislocate the different parts of her body like a belly dancer, and knew how to wiggle her hips in a sexy way that was also kind of funny.

  “Sure I like it,” Alex said. “It’s hot.”

  All right. This was going great. “I took ballet and stuff when I was younger,” Mads said. “Some modern dance. You learn how to move all the parts of your body in different ways.”

  She leaned closer now, parting her lips and putting them in kissing range. He took the bait. He pulled her head toward his and pressed his mouth against hers. She opened her mouth and his tongue wiggled in. Wow. He was a good kisser.

  “Mmm,” he said. She put her arms around his neck and pulled her body closer. He put his arms around her and pressed her against him. He had strong arms.