by Taylor Hart
27
He was the biggest, freaking idiot that he knew … that had ever been.
It was late. Dark. The town of Park City was lit up beneath him.
Water beaded down his skin, making him shiver. He’d been swimming for a long time. The beds of skin on his fingers were puckered. He was exhausted, still breathing hard. The funny thing was that he wasn’t tired. Not even a little bit.
He could still see the way Savannah looked at him. Like her heart was being ripped from her soul. He cringed and stared out at the lights. Usually, he found that his pool and his view were two of the only things that could soothe him. They weren’t working tonight.
It didn’t help that he felt desperate. Powerless. The exact same way he’d felt when Savannah and Sean had told him they were eloping, ten stupid, ridiculous years ago.
His phone buzzed on the chair next to him. Picking it up, he saw a text from Savannah. I’m not cashing your check. I’m leaving for California tomorrow. I’m sorry.
Sadness pulsed through him. All the anger still there, but numb now. Maybe it was for the best, he mused, but the anger crept back as he thought of the fact she had been pregnant with his child once … and he hadn’t even known.
He thought of her going to California and never seeing her again. Pain stabbed into his heart. Tears burned.
The sliding glass door to the deck above by the kitchen clicked open. “Hey.” Damon walked through.
Trying his best to put on a “happy you’re home from your stupid honeymoon and ready to live your happily ever after” face, Luke waved at him. “You’re back?”
Damon nodded and tromped down the steps.
Luke couldn’t help being soothed at seeing his big brother. It’d been more than nice to get along the past year. “Wipe the happy grin off your face, would ya?” Luke teased. “You’re back to reality now, man. I want the old, broody guy.”
Damon let out a light laugh. He sat in the pool chair next to Luke and stared out at the night. “Nick told me you were the broody one now.”
Luke grunted. He’d gone to Nick’s house and told him everything.
Damon surveyed him. “Nick told me he thinks you’re having some mental kind of thing over this girl.”
He rolled his eyes. “Of course Nick filled you in.”
Damon nodded. “He’s like the little sister we never had.”
Luke guffawed, but sobered quickly. “I guess you must have thought my condition was pretty bad if you came over here to check in on me?”
Damon didn’t answer, which meant he did think it was bad.
Both of them sat staring at the lights.
Luke frowned. “She was pregnant with my kid. Then she eloped with my best friend, who happened to know she was pregnant with my kid.”
Damon turned to him. “Are you serious?”
“I got her pregnant the night before I left for that internship in London.” He shrugged. “Dad told me I couldn’t have anyone holding me back if I wanted a future … so I dumped her.”
“Ouch.”
“Then she married my best friend and miscarried my child.” Luke laughed bitterly at the sheer incredulity of it all.
Damon stared at him with the kind of look a team of bombsquaders would have on their faces before trying to dismantle a bomb. “What are you gonna do?”
“I should have just done what she wanted to do—let the past stay in the past.” Luke closed his eyes. “I never should have tried to be with her again.”
“In my experience, the past always chases you down, bro,” Damon said softly.
Luke sniffed. “I wouldn’t listen. I kept just thinking we could overcome anything. That if I just kept doing my thing, she would admit she was in love with me, too. I’m an idiot.”
Damon drummed the side of the chair. “No, you’re a risk taker. But guys like you—and this is the part I love and hate about you—when you’re determined, you don’t look at things like they’re risks.” He blew out a breath. “It’s what makes you a kick-butt businessman. Attorney. Empire builder. You’re savvy, smart, and you read people far better than I do.”
Luke rolled his eyes. “Dude, you jump into burning buildings. I think you have me beat in the risk department.”
“No way. If you would have wanted to be a firefighter, you would have been fierce. You’re bullheaded and cocky and …”
“Sounds like you.”
A smile played on Damon’s lips. “And our little brother jumps in front of bullets. I guess we’re all just …”
“Stupid.” Even though he didn’t want to feel better, it was more than nice to have Damon here, giving him a pep talk. More than he would have ever hoped for a year ago.
Damon blew out a breath. “Maybe.” Then he pushed him in the shoulder. “Forget walking away.”
Luke blinked. “What? Did you not hear me?”
“Forget it.” Damon scowled. “So what? Crap happened. Get over it. Does she love you?”
Luke shook his head. “I don’t know …”
“Bull, you know.” Damon pushed him again.
This time Luke pushed him back. “Stop!”
A wicked glint came into Damon’s eyes. “Do you remember what you told me last year when I was having my breakdown? Do you?”
Luke thought of Sam and all the drama between her and Damon.
“You told me everyone deserves a chance to do what they love.”
“That doesn’t really apply to this.”
Damon threw his hands up. “It doesn’t? Really?”
“No.”
When Damon shoved him again, Luke leapt off the chair, seized Damon’s arm, and threw him back into the other pool chairs. Anger surged inside of him. If Damon wanted to mess with him, he’d picked the wrong night.
Damon was up quick, hands out, ready to brawl. The face he wore showed this was exactly the response he’d wanted. “There ya go, little bro. There’s the fire in you.”
“What?” He was circling Damon now, and Damon circled him. “You make no sense. But keep your hands off me.”
Damon rushed him, grabbing him by the middle and diving into the pool. Luke was off balance and went with him. The water engulfed them and he held on to Damon, more anger surfacing.
When both of them surfaced, Luke took an extra chance to gain leverage and dunk Damon back under. He felt like he was twelve again, at the city pool, trying to show off for the pretty girls.
Damon punched him hard in the gut. Luke reacted, letting him go and giving him a kick for good measure as he surfaced. Damon didn’t seem to care, though; he was … laughing.
It took the wind out of Luke’s anger. “What are you laughing about?”
Damon shook out his hair, then wiped his eyes. “Man, you’re strong.”
Luke grunted and swam to the side. “Says the firefighter.” Yanking himself out and sitting on the side in one motion, he turned back to Damon. “Now explain what the crap you’re talking about.”
“When I go to a fire and we’re going in, I have to make calls. On where the fire could have originated. Where the flow of oxygen will make it burn the fastest. Where the kids would be hiding. But the hardest decision—and you know this—is deciding where to send other men.” His face clouded. “Those are brutal decisions, but they have to get made. And you know I’ve made mistakes. You know this. But you told me ‘everyone should get the chance to choose.’ Everyone should get the chance to choose to jump into a fire if they want. That’s their choice, and they know the risks. Well, bro, forget walking away. Forget doing the safe thing and walking away. Forget that! If Freestones did that—the smart thing, the safe thing—we wouldn’t be Freestones, now, would we?” He pointed at Luke. “You push, because you’re good at pushing. Does that mean you always win every case? Does that mean you’ve always made every business deal? No. But you keep fighting.”
Luke smiled, despite the fact that his brother just manhandled him into the pool. Damon was speaking his language.
“But more than that,” Damon continued, “you love this woman. The stakes are high, the fire is hot, the bullets are flying … Luke Freestone doesn’t back down. He doesn’t walk away. He sure doesn’t let the love of his life think he can’t man up and deal with his crap … and then help her deal with hers. Right?”
Luke’s heart was beating fast. He knew Damon was right, but it terrified him … because he didn’t have a plan, his plan had failed. Blown to pieces. He shook his head. “I don’t know what to do. She …” Words failed him.
“Then you pray, idiot.” Damon nodded at him. “You pray like you’ve never prayed before, and then you trust God. That’s what I do every day, man. Every call. Every person. Every kid I’m trying to save … I pray.”
Luke looked down. “Nick told me the other day I needed to trust in God’s plan. Is this the plan?”
Damon sighed. “You’re the only one who gets to decide that.” He waded to the edge of the pool, staring up at him.
For a second, Luke hesitated. With a deep, shaky breath, he reached down and leveraged him out of the water in one pull. “Thanks.”
Damon winked at him. “Hey, anytime I get to throw you in a pool, it’s a good day.” He play-punched his arm.
Luke responded by punching him hard in his arm.
“Ouch.” Damon cocked an eyebrow.
Although Luke didn’t like to admit it, he had needed the talk. “Well, I’ll be sure to return the favor some time.”
“I’m sure you will.” He yanked his shirt off and began wringing it out. “Are you still going to Jackson tomorrow?”
Luke finally felt like his chest wasn’t so tight. He released a breath. “Yes.” He let out a soft, sad laugh. “Because that’s who I am. I don’t stop a deal because I’m having a personal breakdown.”
Damon shrugged. “Chances, bro. This might be your chance to have what you really need, instead of what you really want.”
Luke was floored. “What?”
“What do you want?”
“What?” Luke asked again.
Damon closed his eyes. “Do you want this woman or not?”
Luke sat up. “Did you hear anything I just told you?”
“Yes, but I think I need to remind you of something else I told you when our brother was in the hospital.”
“What?” Luke asked, not knowing if he wanted to hear what his brother had to say.
Damon shook his head. “It’s not always about you, bro. Your deal. Your life. Sometimes it’s about someone else, like the woman you love.”
He scoffed. “She’s leaving tomorrow and I have to go to Jackson tomorrow. So you’re suggesting I give up a potential billion-dollar deal?”
Damon raised his eyebrows. “I’m not suggesting anything. I’m just asking you to think about what you want.”
28
Savannah woke with a start. Turning to her bedside table. She saw the time—four a.m. Flipping on her lamp, she cringed at the light. Her eyes were still sore from all the crying.
After she’d told Luke everything, she’d run away. Clark had been close and he’d chased her down and insisted on taking her home, even though she hadn’t even been able to talk to him, she’d been crying so hard.
When he’d dropped her off, he’d taken her hand before she’d bolted from the car. “I don’t know what’s going on, Savannah,” he said quietly, “but I hope he didn’t hurt you.”
Then she’d run into the house and to her bedroom, unable to explain that it didn’t matter if he’d hurt her because there was just so much hurt. Her parents had pried it all out of her, her mother hovering over her and demanding answers. Beth had come last night, sat on Savannah’s bed, and watched her pack in the sad, resolute way she had that made her look young.
None of them wanted her to leave, but clearly, they saw she had to go. Of course, her mother had made her wait until the morning to ensure she’d gotten some sleep.
Getting out of bed, her heart beat quickly and she put on her clothes. She’d decided the night before she couldn’t face her parents and Beth again. It was too much.
She was tired of seeing that disappointed, worried look on everyone’s faces.
No. She would be gone before they woke up.
Everything was in her car; all she had to do was get to it.
Quietly, she opened her bedroom door and tiptoed down the hall, staying away from the creaks in the floor. Then, she slipped out the sliding glass back door and dashed around the side of the house.
The sun was just coming up and the sky was a mix of yellow and orange. Pausing, she looked at Luke’s old house and the rope swing. A flutter of sadness filled her.
She blinked and trotted off to the front yard. No. She would not think of Luke. No way.
As she got to her car, she froze next to the driver’s side door. Inside her car, asleep, were her parents in the front seats and Beth all scrunched up in the back seat.
At that moment, her mother’s eyes flashed open. “Ahh!”
Jerking back, Savannah put a hand to her heart. “Oh my gosh.”
“What?” Her father leaned forward and bumped his head on the glass.
Beth jolted upright.
Savannah blinked as tears pooled in her eyes.
Her mother pushed the door open. “We weren’t going to let you sneak out on us.” She got out and then threw her arms around Savannah. “I love you, dear!”
Before Savannah knew it, her father and Beth were there, too, wrapping their arms around her. “You’ll always be our little girl, Savannah. You come home whenever you want,” her father whispered.
Tears flowed down her cheeks, and she felt so loved in this moment. Letting them suffocate her for a few seconds, she couldn’t help but laugh. “How did you know?”
Beth pulled back and cocked an eyebrow at her. “Are you kidding? You’re the sister who eloped, remember?”
At this point, she’d smiled and felt immensely grateful for them. “Thank you,” she said, and reached to hug them all again.
After they all pulled back, her mother took her hand. “I hope you can figure out a way to forgive yourself, baby. Because you deserve a good life. You deserve so much. We love you.” She gestured to her father and Beth and herself. “And I know God loves you.”
Her father had held out an envelope. “There’s a thousand dollars in cash.”
“No, Dad.” She didn’t have much money, but she would figure it out. She had to.
He quoted Robert Frost: “‘Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both.’” Then he kissed her softly on the forehead. “Wherever your travels take you, remember you can always come home. But let your old man give you money. It makes him feel better to know you’re not sleeping on the street, okay?”
So she accepted it, got into the car, and drove away.
29
Luke stood at the Salt Lake airport, watching Nathan Pennington’s jet take off without him. He pushed Nathan’s number, his heart pounding into his throat.
“Hello,” Nathan said.
Luke cleared his throat. “Hey, I … I can’t make it.”
“What?”
Luke began walking toward the parking lot. He decided to tell him the truth. Nathan had told Luke the story of how he’d gotten married on Christmas day, after only knowing his wife for four days. Maybe the guy would understand. “Look, there’s this woman I’ve been in love with for my whole life, and it’s messy and complicated, but I have to go talk to her.”
“Today?” Nathan asked doubtfully.
“I’m sorry.” Luke felt ridiculous. “She was married to my best friend, who passed away serving our country last year. She came back to Park City a couple of weeks ago and I had to see her. She didn’t want to see me. So I hired her to be my matchmaker. To find me a wife.”
There was a long pause on the other end of the line. “This does sound complicated and … like a really good love story.”
The pain in Luke’s chest eased. He hadn�
��t known if Nathan would understand or not, and honestly, he hadn’t made up his mind to stay until a few minutes ago. Damon’s words had run through his mind: What do you want? “I can come next week.”
Nathan sighed. “Man, I … it sounds like a good story, but I’m sorry. I don’t think it’s going to work.”
Luke’s heart sank and he felt a bit nauseous for a second. He paused, sucking in a breath, thinking about the deal falling through.
“I hope things work out with the woman,” Nathan said.
Luke sucked in another breath and started walking again, determination running through him. “I understand.”
Thirty minutes later, Luke strode up to Savannah’s parents’ door. It was almost funny that he was so nervous, like he was seventeen and coming to pick her up for the dance.
Knocking on the door, he leaned back on his heels, his emotions all jumbled. What had he given up to come here? Would it be worth it?
The immediate answer was yes. Savannah was worth it. She was worth everything.
The door flung back and Beth stood there, her hair ratty and black makeup smudged around her eyes. “Luke?” She sounded shocked.
He relaxed a bit; Beth had always been pleasant to him. “Hey. Uh, is Savannah here?” It was only eight-thirty in the morning; he didn’t know where else she would be.
Before Beth could answer, Savannah’s mother and father appeared, both of them looked all disheveled like Beth. “Luke?” Savannah’s mother put her hand to her mouth.
He swallowed. “Is Savannah here?”
She only stared at him.
“Uh, no.” Her father pushed back the screen door and frowned.
Luke noticed her parents were both in their pajamas.
“I’m sorry, Luke.” Her dad pushed his glasses back, reminding Luke of how many times he’d come to their home over the course of his childhood and woken them up early to see if Savannah could play on a Saturday morning. “She left this morning.”
This news jerked him fully awake. His hand shook. “Already?” But as he looked around, he realized he hadn’t even registered her red Camaro was gone.