Unspoken Words (Unspoken #1)

by H. P. Davenport

  The more Jamie touches my body, the more my heart thumps erratically.

  Every time my body rises from the bed he makes no attempt to hide the fact that he is watching me. He is enjoying working my body into a frenzy.

  He spreads my legs further apart, leaving me completely exposed for his exploration. Slowly, he works his way to my core with light kisses on the inside of my thighs. His fingers slide through my folds as he plays with me like I’m his own guitar. His fingers are like magic. His tongue is his instrument.

  My hips rise from the bed as I grip the sheets. Jamie’s hand presses my body back down on the bed as he feasts on me. He licks, sucks, and nibbles on my clit. Bursts of fireworks are forming behind my closed eyelids. My back arches as I scream his name. My entire body is a raging inferno. He inserts one finger, then two stretching me a little. He moves his fingers methodically in and out of my body. Then a third. Oh.My.God.

  His lips suck on my clit while his fingers are hard at work. I don’t know which feels better, the pressure from his fingers, or the sensation of his mouth. Either way, I know I’m not going to last much longer. I grab his hair, holding his face against my core. My hips grind against his face as my body pulses with need. “Jamie . . . Oh, God . . . Don’t stop . . . I’m coming . . .”

  Once my body stops trembling, Jamie withdraws his fingers from me. He licks each finger slowly. My breath hitches. That was sexy as all hell.

  “Did you like?” His voice husky from arousal.

  I nod. A grin emerges on his face before his lips begin to sear a path up my stomach, taking my breast in his mouth. When he finally manages to work his way up, my lips recapture his. The taste of myself on him makes me want him more, if that’s even possible. He did this to me. I’ve never felt this with anyone and I don’t think I ever will again.

  I reach over, opening the drawer to his nightstand. My hand reaches around until I find what I am looking for. I pull a condom out of the box, handing it to Jamie. “We need to use these . . . for now,” I say in a broken whisper.

  Unfazed, Jamie tears the wrapper open, sheathing his hard erection with the condom. He nudges my legs open wider as he slips the tip of himself into my opening. I push my heels into the mattress and dig my nails into his shoulders. I gasp in delight feeling his erection against my core.

  Gradually, inch by inch, Jamie presses himself inside of me. I inhale sharply as my body adjusts to him.

  “Ah, baby, you’re so tight. You feel so good.” His cheek brushes along mine.

  Slowly he pulls out of me, then enters me again. With each thrust of his hips, he gets deeper inside of me. My hands work their way to his ass, wanting to feel all of him. He withdraws again, and I wonder if he wants to prolong this. But I don’t think I’m capable.

  “Jamie, don’t stop. I need you.”

  “You’re mine, Cami, you always have been.”

  “Oh . . . Jamie . . . harder . . . please.”

  He thrusts his hips harder, filling me. “You are so beautiful. God, Cami. I can’t get enough of you,” he says in between each thrust.

  My body is on fire, my core is tingling with desire. As my climax ricochets through my body, a moan of ecstasy slips through my lips. My whole body floods with desire. “Jamie, don’t stop. Just like that. Keep doing that.” I bury my face into his throat as my body begins to tremble from my orgasm.

  He whispers in my hair, “I love you. I’ve only ever loved you. I’ve never loved anyone else before, Camryn. You own my heart. You always have.”

  A soft gasp escapes me. His declaration, makes my heart beat rapidly. He thrusts his hips a few more times, reaching his climax. I can feel the pulse of his erection as he empties into my body. I wish there didn’t have to be something between us, no barriers, but a condom is a must.

  Tears began to pool in my eyes. Cupping his face, “I love you too.”

  We make love several more times throughout the night. I’m not sure what time it is, but the sunlight is sneaking through the blinds. With my head on Jamie’s chest, I can hear the beat of his heart. A heart that beats for me . . . and only me, as Jamie told me over and over last night.

  I slowly trail my fingertips along the design on his chest outlining his tattoo. I admire his body art. I could stare at the tattoos that cover his arms, shoulder, and chest for hours. Jamie’s hand begins to trace little circles on my left arm as he holds me against his chest.

  This is where I want to spend the rest of my life. Wrapped in the arms of the man I love. The man I want to wake up every day next to and spend every day with. Jamie represents everything from my past and I hope he represents everything in my future.

  After those three little words left my mouth, I felt as though a wave of euphoria washed over me. I have never told a guy I love him because I knew all along my heart belonged to Jamie. Hearing Jamie tell me how much he loves me only reconfirmed what I already knew. This man is everything to me. He is my world. He always has been and always will be.

  Was I a little shocked when Jamie told me I am the only one he has ever said those words to? Absolutely. He wrapped me in a silken cocoon of his love. I would have thought he’d told Tabitha he loved her. I guess that’s what I get for assuming.

  Jamie’s voice breaks me from my string of thoughts. “Can I ask you something?” he asks quietly. I almost didn’t hear him.

  “Sure.”

  “No secrets, right?” He speaks in an odd, yet gentle tone.

  “Of course, no secrets. We didn’t do secrets before, so we aren’t going to start now.” I say a little more harshly than how I wanted to. Why he is accusing me of keeping something from him? We’ve been down this road before and I refuse to go down it again.

  “Were you going to tell me about the job offer?” His soothing voice says matter-of-factly.

  I pull away from him and sit up, wrapping the sheet around my body, then cross my legs over each other.

  “How do you even know about that?” I study his face unhurriedly, feature by feature trying to get a read on what he is thinking.

  His eyes are now studying me with a curious intensity. He’s upset with me. Did he actually think I wouldn’t tell him about this? He is one of the reasons why I’m going to take the job. To stay in New York—with him. I want to see where this relationship is going. I knew the moment Shelby offered me the job I’d take it. Granted, the salary increase and the promotion are amazing, but the opportunity to stay here with Jamie outweighs any financial incentive.

  He picks at a piece of lint on the blanket avoiding eye contact. “Lincoln told me. He dropped the bomb on me right before you got there. I didn’t have a chance to talk to you about it before our set started. Why wouldn’t you tell me?”

  I reach for his hand, clasping it with mine. “Look at me.” He needs to look at me when I tell him my answer. I want him to see how much love I have for him. His dark eyes bore into me while I begin to speak.

  “I had every intention of telling you. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that I wanted this when Shelby offered me the job. Yeah, the raise is amazing. Yeah, having more people work with me on my column is great. But those aren’t the reasons why I’m taking the job. You are the main reason I am taking this position. I want to live my life waking up next to you, and loving you.”

  His eyes are wide as if I shocked him with my response. “I wanted to surprise you with the news. I had plans for the two of us going to dinner to celebrate, then afterwards I was hoping we would head to my parents’ house to fill them in on the details. I wasn’t trying to keep anything from you. No secrets.”

  He cups my face between his hands. “I’m sorry I thought the worst. I didn’t know if you wanted to go back to LA to get away from here. To get away from the bad memories. I was dreading taking you to the airport. It would have been like deja vu for me. The day you got on the plane to head to Stanford, that’s the day my life changed. In that moment, I knew I was in love with you. You took a piece of my heart with you to California.�
��

  A soft gasp escapes me. I hesitate, blinking with bafflement. “Wait. Did you just say you’ve loved me since I left for college? Why didn’t you ever tell me?” I can’t believe he’s felt this way for years and never told me.

  His gaze lowers, as does his voice. “I didn’t want to chance telling you in case you didn’t feel the same way. I wasn’t willing to risk our friendship. For years people always assumed something was going on between us. We were always together, always joking around, always flirting. It was how we were. But the moment you weren’t going to be there next to me, everything changed. I felt like a part of me was missing when you boarded that plane. I know it sounds absurd, but I struggled for months when you first left. Yeah, we talked all the time, pretty much every week, but it wasn’t the same. I was used to looking at your beautiful face every day.”

  Licking my lips nervously, I say, “Since we’re being honest here. I think you are the reason my relationships never worked out. Not that there were many of them. I always seemed to compare them to you. They weren’t funny like you, they didn’t make me laugh, treat me like you did. In the end, they just weren’t you. I confessed to Morgan a while back that I thought my feelings for you were more than friendship. She kept pushing me to tell you, but, like you, I was afraid that you wouldn’t feel the same way. She told me that I would never know unless I told you. So when I found out that I would be home for three months, she told me this was my opportunity to put myself out there. To be honest with you about my feelings. I had intentions of telling you, but I wanted to put some feelers out there to see if the feelings were reciprocated.”

  Jamie reaches out with his powerful hands, and he yanks me up toward him. His arms encircle me, one hand on the small of my back, while burying his other hand in my thick hair. His expression grows serious. “Well, my love, the feelings are definitely reciprocated. I am head over heels in love with you and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m just thankful, that you feel the same way. I’m glad you took a chance on us and opened your heart to me.”

  Gently he eases me down onto the bed. I moan softly as he lies on top of me. My hands caress the planes of his back. I am loving the feel of his body pressed against me. I could definitely get used to waking up like this every day. The weight of him is my protection against the world in this moment.

  I quickly sneak a kiss in. “I’m in love with you too.”

  The past few days have been a blur. Most of my time has been spent wrapped in Jamie’s arms in bed. We have christened every piece of furniture in his apartment. I can’t get enough of him. The more time we spend together, the more I want. He surprised me with breakfast in bed this morning before he left for the studio, so I figure I’ll return the favor and bring him and my brother lunch.

  When I enter the studio, Christian turns to see who is coming in. He gives me a quick smile then nods his head toward the table, and continues working the gadgets on the sound board. Jamie is rocking his head to the beat of whatever is being played through the headphones.

  I place the bags of food on the table near the door and walk over to stand behind Jamie. He doesn’t realize that I am here yet. I place my hands on his shoulders, giving him a firm squeeze, and place a kiss on the side of his neck. His head tilts to the side, giving me more access. I give him a series of slow, shivery kisses as I make my way to his cheek. He slides his earphones off. He crooks his finger at me. I lean in and kiss him on the lips. The kiss deepens as he slips his tongue against mine. A few more kisses on the lips, then he swats my ass as I turn to walk back towards the table.

  A chill courses through my body, causing my skin to crawl. I turn to look into the studio and I see Chad.

  “Why is Troubled Pasts here? I thought they finished up last time they were in town.”

  “Chad said he wanted to make a few changes to a song. Christian had them come back in. I can’t wait to get the douche out of here and back on a plane to LA.”

  Christian says into the mic, “That’s a wrap. We got what we need.” Buffer’s eyes fixate on mine through the glass as he says, “Now that’s how it’s done, sweetie.”

  My entire body starts to shake. My drink slips from my hand, smashing on the hardwood floor. My shaky hand covers my mouth as my eyes widen in horror. I stare at Buffer through the glass as the blood drains from my face. His eyes are trained on me as he laughs with the guys in his band. The look on his face causes goosebumps to blanket my body.

  Buffer’s eyes are locked on mine. Jamie jumps up from his chair, quickly pulling me into his embrace. “What’s wrong, Camryn?” I don’t answer. “Baby.” He shakes my arms. “You’re scaring me.”

  Even as Jamie holds me, my body won’t stop shaking. I manage to get out. “That’s what . . . the guy said . . . to me when he . . . finished raping me,” I say in between shaky breaths. “It’s him.”

  Buffer exits the recording booth and I pull away from Jamie’s hold. I lunge at Buffer striking him in the face. I hit him repeatedly, before Christian grabs me, wrapping both of his arms around my body holding me tightly against his chest.

  Jamie lunges for Buffer once Christian has me. They fall to the floor. Jamie throws punch after punch, making contact with Buffer’s face.

  Christian whispers in my ear. “Please, calm down. Listen to me, Cami. We will take care of this. You are safe now.”

  Chad and another band members pull Jamie off Buffer.

  Jamie breaks from their hold and makes his way to me. I have no intention of allowing myself to be his prey again. I will fight back with everything I have. He can’t hurt me. Jamie and Christian are here. I thrust against his hold, trying to break free. But the more I fight, the tighter Christian’s hold becomes.

  “I’m gonna fucking kill him. I swear, I’ll kill him with my bare hands,” Christian mutters. Christian reaches for the phone, calling 911. He tells the operator that an officer is needed to arrest a rape suspect and provides his name, my name, and the address to the studio. When Christian hangs up the phone, all hell breaks loose again.

  “You’re crazy. I didn’t touch you,” Buffer screams.

  Jamie lunges at Buffer again knocking him to the ground. Jamie lands several punches on his face. The members of Troubled Pasts just stand there watching Jamie and Buffer wrestle on the floor. I’m surprised they are just standing there. His friends are watching him get the shit kicked out of him. Jamie lands another few punches, as he yells, “Come on. Hit me. You get off on beating and raping innocent women. Come on, you pussy. Hit me.”

  Buffer tries to slide out from under Jamie, but his knees are holding down his arms. My brother lets me go, placing me in a chair. “Sit there and don’t move!” he yells.

  Christian scrambles to pull Jamie off of Buffer.

  Jamie is immediately by my side. He places his hands on the side of my face. “Are you okay?” I nod my head. Jamie pulls me into a hug. I can feel his heart pounding in his chest.

  Chad pulls Buffer up from the ground and throws him against the wall. “What the fuck did you do, man? Did you rape Camryn?” he yells.

  Buffer pushes Chad away from him, then says, “I didn’t touch that bitch, she’s crazy.”

  That comment scores him a punch to the face from my brother. My brother grabs the sleeves of his shirt, pulling him up. Faint scars appear on his forearm from where I scratched him.

  “Really, dude? She’s crazy? How’d you get those marks on your arm?” Christian replies sharply.

  Buffer doesn’t answer my brother’s question. He turns his attention to me and his lips turn up into an evil smile. My brother slams him into the wall. Chad quickly wraps his arms around Christian’s body pulling him back.

  “Dude, as much as you want to kill him, you can’t. Leave it for the authorities,” Chad says to Jamie and my brother.

  The police arrive within minutes and Buffer is removed from the studio in handcuffs. I’m advised that I should come down to the station to meet with the detectives.

  Jam
ie comes over and squats down in front of me taking my hands in his. “I’m here, Cami, he will never hurt you again. Do you hear me? He will never touch you again.”

  I lean in and kiss him, then wrap my arms around his neck burying my face in his shoulder. Feeling Jamie’s protective arms wrap around me, I lose it. I cry because this nightmare may finally be over. I let out all of the pent up emotions that I have been concealing deep within me.

  CAMRYN

  I LIE ON my bed reading the latest release from one of my favorite authors until a soft knock taps at my bedroom door. Shifting my gaze from the Kindle to the door I instruct whoever it is, “the door is open.”

  My mom peeks her head in. “Are you busy, sweetheart?” she asks. I close up my tablet, placing it on the nightstand next to my bed. “Nope, I have nothing but time on my hands, come in.”

  My mom makes her way over and sits at the foot of my bed. A thoughtful smile curves her mouth.”

  I have yet to tell her everything that happened that night. I have been working on how to express my feelings and fears with my family. My visits with Gayle have helped me tremendously. The way she has me open up to her astounds me. I was never one to feel comfortable talking with strangers, especially about something so personal, but Gayle has a way of making me want to talk about it. It’s as if the floodgates open and I can’t control the emotions that I express during my sessions.

  Knowing that the monster who raped me is no longer walking the same streets has given me a newfound strength to move forward. A little part of me has healed knowing he’s behind bars. The detectives obtained a court order for Buffer’s DNA. It was a match to the samples in my rape kit. I no longer feel the need to constantly look over my shoulder, thinking it could happen again.

  Every day my feelings for Jamie grow. I’m irrevocably in love with the boy who has always been by my side. From my first baseball glove, to my first scraped knee, my first black eye, to all of my birthdays. Even when Jamie and I were apart, there wasn’t a week that went by that we didn’t speak. I may have been on the other side of the country, but he always made me feel as if he was right there with me.