Trying To Live With The Dead (The Veil Diaries Series Book 1)

by B. L. Brunnemer

  “And if I don’t want too?” He asked his dark eyes meeting mine.

  “Then it won’t be a suggestion.” I gestured around the yard. “I’ll grab that ear and we’ll be right back here. You’ll be sparring with the guys again until you get whatever it is out of your system.” When he didn’t look at me, I continued. “We’re not going to let you destroy your life, so we’ll manage whatever this is until you are ready to talk about it. Sound good?” Isaac was quiet for a few minutes, that was fine. I wasn’t going anywhere. Finally, he looked at me again.

  “You’re right.” He admitted resigned. “I could really hurt someone, or kill them.”

  “So if one of us says take a walk?”

  “I’ll take a walk.” He agreed.

  “Thank you Cookie Monster.” He got to his feet and reached down for me. I took his hands and he pulled me up to my feet. After I was standing he pulled me into a hug, I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed back.

  “You’re a pain in the ass Red.” He whispered into my hair. I snickered.

  “Especially when I’m right.” He huffed before pulling away. We headed back to the others. I was tired and done for the night. I wanted my bed at Miles’ house and sleep.

  “We have a new rule in place.” I said getting their attention.

  “If I do that quiet thing at another party, tell me to take a walk.” Isaac said his voice tired.

  “And if you don’t?” Zeke asked, frowning at him. Isaac snorted.

  “Get Red. She’ll get me outside.” He admitted. “There might be more sparring involved then.” Ethan snorted.

  “Good, because you are rusty as fuck.” Ethan said emphatically. “Mom’s never going to let you back into the ring like that.” Isaac snorted.

  “Everyone ready to leave?” Zeke asked looking down the line. Everyone nodded. We headed inside. It was quieter, the party was winding down. When we reached the big room, I paused.

  “I’m going to use the bathroom real quick. I’ll meet you guys outside.” I said, they all nodded and headed for the door. I went down the hall next to the kitchen and found the bathroom. When I was done, I opened the door and froze. Jason was standing there his hands on the door frame blocking off the hallway.

  “I’ve been looking for you.” Jason said he blinked hard. His voice changed. “Now we’re going to have fun.” It wasn’t Jason's voice anymore. It was Bitch Ghost. My heart slammed in my chest. He or she tackled me. I hit the floor hard, my head hitting the tile. My back in agony. Adrenaline slammed through me and suddenly I didn’t hurt anymore, I wasn’t tired. I was pissed. When Jason's body sat up, with his legs straddling my waist. I made a fist with both hands and brought it down towards Jason’s groin. Bitch Ghost grabbed my arms before I connected. She forced my arms back over my head. I head butted Jason’s face, his nose burst, blood poured. It probably hurt like hell, but it didn’t stop Bitch Ghost. She dropped all of Jason's weight onto me, pinning me by the elbows. I struggled against the weight; it was getting harder to breathe. She let go of my right arm and pulled back the sleeve of my left. I brought a fist down on Jason’s face, again and again. It did nothing but split Jason’s lip and give him a black eye. She reached for my beads. My chest burned as terror ran through me. I screamed.

  “Asher! Downstairs bathroom!” Bitch Ghost ripped my bracelets apart. Beads flew everywhere I vaguely heard them bouncing off the tile. Suddenly my head was in a vice, my pulse in my ears as I felt Bitch Ghost pressing against my mind. It wasn’t as bad as last time but that’s like saying this stab wound was less likely to kill me then the other. Jason’s hands wrapped around my face as she brought his body in closer. I bucked trying to throw his weight off of me as my barriers held against her. Suddenly Jason’s weight was pulled off me. I looked up to see Asher and Zeke slamming Jason against the opposite door.

  “That’s not Jason!” I croaked getting to my feet. I darted into the hallway where they were struggling to hold him. Jason’s body bucked bringing his body off the door. They slammed him back, this time through the door. Ethan, Isaac and Miles were running down the hall towards us. I followed Asher and Zeke into the room where they grappled with Bitch Ghost; her energy making Jason’s body stronger than he should be. “Get him on his back on the floor!” I shouted. Zeke and Asher glanced at me then at each other. Then got a better grip on Jason’s body on one side Asher on the other Zeke. They both kicked the back of Jason’s knees. They dropped like a rock. Zeke and Asher’s body weight dragged Jason down landing on top of Zeke and Asher. Bitch Ghost was trying to break free of their grip. Heart racing, I jumped on top of Jason pinning his chest with my body weight. The others ran in and were struggling to pin his arms. “Someone get his mouth open!” Ethan's hands went to Jason’s face and pried his mouth open. I reached down, jerked the vial from my necklace. I popped it open with my thumb then poured the salted holy water down Jason’s throat. Bitch Ghost gave out a scream that was cut off when Jason’s body went limp. The salted holy water had forced Bitch Ghost out of Jason’s body. Trying to catch my breath, I looked down at Zeke and Asher over Jason’s shoulders. They were out of breath too. Zeke met my eyes.

  “Can we do plan b now?” He asked seriously. I nodded and tried to get off Jason’s chest. Hands steadied me as I wobbled; I looked up to see Miles holding me. Ethan and Isaac pulled Jason’s body off of the others. Zeke and Asher groaned as they got to their feet. My mind ran through Bitch Ghosts memories, looking for her grave site. St Michael's. Fourth row in, north corner lot. I shook my head pushing them away again. When everyone got their breath back, they all looked at me.

  “We’re ending this now.” I announced my voice hard. Everyone nodded. “We’ll need shovels, salt, gas and a lighter.” I turned around, strode out the door and through the house the boys right on my heels. We were walking across the now empty lawn before anyone spoke again.

  “Miles, Isaac. Go get the salt from the house and pick up a lighter.” Zeke took charge. “We’ll get some shovels and the fuel.”

  “Wait, where is the grave?” Miles asked. Everyone cursed.

  “I know where it is.” I told them opening the door to the blazer. They looked at me quizzically. I wave a hand. “It’s part of Bitch Ghost’s memory download.” They accepted that. Everyone agreed to meet at the graveyard.

  “Be careful, she has enough juice to jump another person.” I warned them before we split up. Asher, Zeke and Ethan climbed into my blazer. My heart still racing, I took off like a bat out of hell.

  “Easy there Beautiful. We need to get there in one piece.” Ethan warned me his hand on my shoulder.

  “Where are we going to find shovels at this time of night?” Asher asked his voice tense.

  “We don’t have to, there's a groundskeeper shed at the cemetery. That’s where they’ll keep the shovels.” I pulled onto the highway. “They’ll probably have a gas can with the lawnmower.” I wanted to push the pedal down, but the gauge said I was already doing ten over the speed limit. Was the gauge even right? Are we really doing sixty-five? I don’t think that’s right, it feels too slow. Tension hung in the air as I drove to the cemetery.

  “How are you going to feel about this Lexie? You’re don’t know where she’s going.” Asher asked from the back seat. I didn’t want to think about that, I couldn’t. Bitch Ghost was pushing things too far. It was time to push back.

  “I think she forfeited that consideration tonight.” I mumbled as I finally pulled into the cemetery.

  I pulled to a stop near the grounds keeper shed. I didn’t even bother shutting off the Blazer. I was out and running to the door in a blink. The door was locked. I immediately slammed my shoulder into it. It didn’t budge. I was stepping back to do it again when hands caught me.

  “Let’s have someone with a lot more mass do the breaking, huh sweetie?” Asher suggested, pulling me away from the door. His hands giving me a squeeze. Zeke stepped towards the door. Why the hell didn’t I think of that? I really needed to calm down; I
focused on taking deep calming breaths as Zeke broke through the door with his shoulder. I darted into the shed behind Zeke. They grabbed the shovels while I looked for the lawn mower and the gas can. I found the can, but it was empty. I cursed.

  “What’s wrong?” Ethan asked stepping up to me.

  “No gas.”

  “We can sypher the gas from the truck, we just need a tube.” He offered. I looked around the shed my eyes finding a garden hose.

  “There’s a box cutter in the toolbox in the back, we can cut the garden hose.” I told him already running out the door and to the back of the blazer. The back gate was already open, so I jumped in and crawled to where I kept my dad’s toolbox. I opened it and found the box cutter. I ran back past Zeke and Asher who were loading the shovels into the truck. Ethan took the box cutter from me.

  “Let me do it, you're shaking so much that you’ll just cut yourself.” Ethan lectured as he measured out the length he wanted. “We still need to dig Beautiful.” He told me cutting the hose. “It’s still going to be awhile, calm down or you’ll wear yourself out before we’re even done.” I nodded. He was right. I focused on taking deep calming breaths as we all got into the truck again. I kept breathing like that as I drove to the ghost’s grave site. Zeke looked at me confused.

  “What’s wrong? Why are you breathing like that?” He snapped.

  “She’s having a big adrenaline rush, I told her to calm down.” Ethan explained. Zeke just went back to looking out the window. I stopped the truck. We got out the boys grabbing the shovels as I lead them to the grave. It was exactly where Bitch Ghosts memories told me. It had a modest headstone. Asher used the flashlight on his keys to look at the name.

  “That’s her.” I confirmed looking away from the name. I couldn’t think of her as having a name right now.

  “Move Ally.” Asher told me. I got off the grave as Asher and Zeke started digging. Ethan pulled me away from the grave back to the blazer. He opened the gas cap and started explaining what he was doing. He put the hose into the gas tank the gas can on the ground. Then he sucked on the end of the hose. It only took a few seconds then he was spitting out a little gas and put the end of the hose into the gas can.

  “Oh that’s disgusting.” Ethan told me making a face. “You owe me cookies for this.” I gave him a small smile, my stomach in knots. My hands were starting to shake again. I didn’t have my beads, she was still out there. She’s going to realize what we’re doing. When Ethan thought we had enough fuel, he took the hose out of the tank and put the cap back on. Now that we had the gas, we both grabbed shovels and started digging. We had to get down eight feet, burn a body and then put all that dirt back before morning. I lost myself in the rhythm of digging I didn’t want to think about what I was doing. I hated what I was doing. The dead should be allowed to rest, but this bitch wasn’t giving me a choice. I wasn’t aware that the others arrived until Isaac was taking my shovel from me. I blinked up at him confused. His eyes ran over me, his face worried.

  “Go sit down Red, I’ll take over.” I bit the corner of my lip and looked at the others. Asher and Zeke were in the grave too, no one else would fit. They worked fast; we were already down three feet. I nodded and let go of my shovel. Isaac gave me a boost so I could climb out of the grave. When I had nothing to do, my mind ran around in circles. Miles and Ethan stayed close by, keeping an eye out for anyone coming. This was wrong, wasn’t it? I didn’t know where I was sending this girl. But she wasn’t giving me much of a choice. Well she was, be possessed the rest of my life or burn her body. Not much of a choice. Without something to do, my hands started shaking again. I knew I had to do this to keep people safe from her, but it didn’t stop my stomach from knotting tight. I knew exactly when the ghost became aware of what we were doing. We had three feet left and it was as if a bell was hit. Only you couldn’t hear it. I felt the vibration along my skin, I instantly knew she had another body and was heading here.

  “She’s coming.” I told the guys. Miles came over to me.

  “How do you know?” He asked voice gentle.

  “I can feel her and she’s getting close.” I said my voice shaking. I started going over the plan I’ve been making since I was jumped. How I was going to keep her out. I went over it, again and again. Miles took my hand and squeezed it reassuringly.

  “We’re here Lexie; you’re not alone in this.” Miles told me calmly. It helped me calm down a bit more. Knowing they were there. If she jumped me again, the guys knew what to do. I wasn’t at risk of dying in an emergency room. “Lexie, you're freezing.” Was I? I didn’t really notice. I was watching the roads, trying to figure out where she was coming from. Still going over my plan again and again. It helped keep the fear from crashing down on me. Miles put my hand between both of his trying to warm it. His hands stopped rubbing. “Lexie, where are your bracelets?” Everyone looked at me. I’d never seen fear on one of their faces before. Now I saw it on all of them.

  “She broke them back at the house.” I told them, my hands shaking again. Curses went around as the guys went back to work, digging faster. Ethan walked over to us.

  “What about your necklaces?” I swallowed hard.

  “I used the holy water on Jason, and the other is just general protection.” I explained squeezing Miles hand.

  “That means she can jump you right?” Ethan asked his jaw clenching. I felt her enter the cemetery.

  “Yeah.” I pulled my hands from Miles looking out at the road.

  “Then what the hell is the plan if she gets here before we’re done?” Ethan asked me his voice getting low.

  “I try to keep her from jumping me while you guys salt and burn her bones.” I admitted. Headlights glowed on the road, the driver going too fast on the gravel. I looked at Ethan, his face was dark. “Why do you think I’ve been so jittery this whole time?” I looked back to the road as the car made its way towards us. I recognized that car. Ethan shouted for the guys to dig faster. The red Ford Focus came to a sliding stop. Tara got out of the car, a snarl on her face. Oh, hell no. That bitch was not fucking with my cousin. I suddenly felt solid again, my temper boiling. It felt good right now. If the bitch wanted a fight, she was going to get one. Tara walked around her car her eyes fixed on me.

  “Salt then burning.” I reminded them before I stepped away. “You have about twenty minutes if she gets through me.” I met Tara’s body halfway to the road. I heard Ethan shouting at the guys, Miles' voice joining in. I didn't hear what they said; my total concentration was in front of me.

  “Get the fuck out of my cousin bitch.” I growled. She smirked using Tara’s face.

  “Gladly.” She reached out to grab me; I caught her hand with mine. The world disappeared as we went to war. Adrenaline surged as Bitch Ghost slammed her energy against me. My barriers shook. Pain burst behind my eyes as she tried brute force. I didn’t attack her. I had been thinking about this in the back of my mind since she jumped me. I shored up my barriers; I used my memories like stone blocks reinforcing the weak parts, closing them off before she could use them. I kept breathing as I ignored the pain running through my head. I pushed every emotion I had out of my head, every thought except one. Don’t let her in. She sent wave after wave of energy at me, knocking chunks of my barrier away. I kept reinforcing it. When she backed off for a heartbeat, I wrapped myself into a ball, with a hard barrier around me. She slammed through my barriers using everything she had. I felt them like a physical snap as they broke, she poured in. She tried to pour over my soul, drowning me. I sank down in the blackness in my little ball. She thrashed above me as I sank, she couldn’t find me. She felt me, but couldn’t find me. That’s when I reached for that place inside me where my anger lived, always there, always waiting. It had been growing ever since she went after Miles; it grew when she went after Zeke. And I let it out. Hot boiling waves boiled up through her blackness, lighting her up like a torch. She couldn’t flee she could only try to cool my rage. But you can’t use rage to stop r
age. She changed tactics. She threw her happy, blissful memories around her like a geode hiding in molten rock. I thought of the boys, how they were hurrying to save my ass. I thought of how they had adopted me and made me feel cared for again. It was a powerful memory, hard as diamond. I used that memory like a chisel and I went a knockin. I tore down her walls, grabbed her around the metaphysical neck, and threw her out.

  I opened my eyes gasping, my head exploding in pain. Disoriented. The world spinning, hot wetness on my face. I couldn’t focus. I saw Bitch Ghost had complete shock on Tara’s face my vision watery. Then she snarled and tackled me. My back hit a flat tombstone stunning me with pain. It gave her the opening she needed. She wrapped her hands around my throat and started to squeeze. I heard shouting around me as I tried to pry her hands off me. I felt feet running through the ground. It was disorienting. Like the grass in the cemetery was my skin, and I could feel everyone and everything in it. It was only a flash, and then it was gone. I blinked up at Tara’s face.

  “You fucking bitch!” She growled at me. “You don’t deserve to live!” I heard a whoosh sound. Tara’s body froze above me, a look of pure horror on her face. Her mouth was open in a silent scream as the flames ripped through Bitch Ghost’s soul. I heard her screaming, and I was screaming inside with her. With my barriers down, I felt it all. The agony as the fire tore into us.

  We were going to die, going to be wiped away. There was nothing! Black despair poured through us shaking our bodies. Our lungs burned as we continue to be torn apart. Tears fell down our face as we felt the end coming. We saw that stone ledge in the dark above the abyss of black. We saw it coming as we burned, singed, and ripped. We tried to crawl away from it, fingers digging into the dirt. Only here the dirt was sand and it wanted to go with you. Our hearts clenched, our limbs shook, our very souls cried out shivering and shaking as we slipped closer along the stone. Our chest clutched, our heart was slowing, our soul fading. Our feet were off the edge dangling over that dark pit. Our hands clinging to the ledge that was sand covered rock. No, she was off the edge; she was desperately clinging to the ledge. I was laying across from her, my eyes on hers. I saw the terror in her eyes. I saw the tears, I saw her. As she was in life, as she had been. Singing in choir like an angel, helping everyone around her. I saw her in that moment. Completely, utterly beautiful and unique. There was no other like Mary Summers. No. no, no! I felt my heart shatter as I realized what I had done. I reached for her and grabbed her hands hard. I couldn’t let her go into that nothingness. I couldn’t. She was a soul; she didn’t deserve that black void. This was WRONG! I tried to pull her back. I pulled and pulled, but she was being sucked down into the void. Tears falling I could barely hold on to her anymore, the pull on her was too strong. Panicking I met her cerulean blue eyes. They were terrified. I kept trying to pull her back to this world, to keep her here. But she was fading in front of me. Her face was fading, her body, her hands in mine. I tried to keep hold of her. I kept looking her in the eye as she faded into nothing. Because no one should die alone, no one should go this way. So I held her gaze, tears falling down my face as I watched her soul die in front of me on that sandy ledge. Then she was gone. Not even dust remained on the hot wind blowing across the stone. Lightning cracked above me in the silence. I looked up to see the green moving through the clouds. They boiled. That wasn’t right. I don’t know how I knew, but I knew that wasn’t right. I looked around the ledge of the pit; trees were dead and burnt to a crisp. That wasn’t right. I looked up again and understood what I was seeing. Souls that cross over go up through those clouds, but nothing was crossing over. I looked around me at the burnt and dead Veil. I saw how the dead came like a movie playing in my head. The Veil was thin; it was supposed to allow you to come here. It was the natural order. I don’t know how I knew this, I just did.But now the Veil was thick and fogged over. I found one last clear spot just before it was poured over by fog. The Veil was shut. Souls couldn’t get inside to cross over naturally. Someone shut them out. It’s going to take someone to let them in. In that moment, I have never felt more hatred than I did for the one who did this. This was the reason the area was wrong, this was the reason souls had more energy. I saw it all, understood it all in a heartbeat. Then I was jerked backwards hard. I opened my eyes not understanding what I was seeing. Stars above, something hard underneath me, my heart being shredded. A heavy weight across me, pushing me down. I took great big gulping breaths, trying to ease the burn in my lungs. My throat tight. I was still seeing her eyes as she disappeared as if she had been nothing. Like she had never loved, never laughed, never even existed. I vaguely registered the guys pulling Tara off me. Miles pulling my upper body from the ground, his arms wrapping around me. His mouth was moving but I couldn’t hear him. Mary Summers had been a person, a soul. And I had wiped her from existence as if she were nothing.