by Ceri Beynon
“I’d like to speak in support of the city” says Frederick, his eyes intense and mysterious.
“Go ahead, please” says Frank, looking a little awe-struck, as though he greatly admires Frederick.
“This is a wonderful city. It’s a city that has its own values, its own culture. A city with an individuality that sets it apart from the rest. This city changed and perhaps saved my life. I represent it and it represents me .Who would want to change it? If you want happiness and colour, go to another city where you can legitimately embrace this without interference. Leave the city as it is, the way it was meant to be. That’s all I have to say on the matter” he says, returning to his sullen yet enigmatic silence.
A number of group members clap, cheer and whistle in agreement with what Frederick has just said. I think that I also agree with him. Yes the King can be harsh, but what makes this city remarkable is its uniqueness. The Smiley’s want to make it the same as everywhere else and in some ways that would be a shame.
“Everyone has this idea that we want to drastically change this city. We don’t, we just want to promote the freedom and choice to be happy and wear colour if you choose. At the moment people are forced, now by law, to be gloomy and miserable all the time. I think that’s wrong. I think that’s dictatorship” says The Smiley forcefully, reaffirming her point.
“Okay, well both points are relevant and thank you both for speaking up so that the group can see two sides to the argument. You there, young lady, we’ve never heard from you before. Would you like to add something?” asks Frank, motioning to me.
Suddenly everyone’s eyes are on me and I glance towards Calix, not sure if I should speak as I’m not a citizen. Calix whispers ‘go on’, encouraging me to say something.
“I’m very fond of this city. Yes its eerie and dark but that’s what makes it special. I can see why The Smiley’s feel frustrated. The King is nuts, but I think that it’s the King who’s the problem, not the city.” I say shakily.
Calix smiles and says ‘good job’, although I’m aware that he looks a combination of amused, embarrassed and shocked at my public King-bashing speech.
“Thank you for that” says Frank animatedly.
“Well. Everyone’s had their say. There are so few of us here today that I’ll think we’ll wrap it up a little earlier than planned. Here again, same time next week then I suppose. Thank you all for coming” says Frank.
“I’d just like to add that this meeting is now strictly confidential .If the King finds out about this group, he’ll have the meetings stopped. So I’ll ask everyone to keep your attendance here secret and be wary of telling anyone about this group. Please understand that this step is necessary for the safety and well being of all group members. We can only achieve positive steps if we can keep these group meetings going for a consistent period. Thank you all again” says Calix.
As we leave the meeting, Calix walks alongside Frederick.
“How’s Anita Freddie, will she be here next week?” asks Calix in an almost concerned tone. I’m baffled why he seems so worried.
Frederick remains silent and looks away.
“Frederick! It’s the ballet, isn’t it?” asks Calix ,more demanding and less friendly this time.
“Yes Calix. If you really want to know, it finally happened. The way we always knew it would” Frederick finally snaps. I have no idea what they mean.
“What’s happened to Anita?” I ask, now worried myself, but they both ignore me.
“They took her then?” he asks.
“Yes.” says Frederick, blocking all his emotion. He becomes cold and robotic. His eyes hiding a sadness ,a dark memory that fascinates me, just as much as Anita’s disappearance.
“When Frederick? When did they take her?” asks Calix, frantically.
“Last night. She was there at the ballet, as usual. Every single performance. Then sometime during the interval she began crying and screaming manically. The Theatre staff led her out as she was disturbing the other audience members. But she didn’t stop. The crying, the screaming continued. She kept saying ‘My broken dream, my broken purpose’ over and over again, so I’ve been told. So the Theatre staff, not knowing what to do and being unable to contact me as I was training and had switched my phone off, called The Black Hospital. They came to collect her in an ambulance and that’s where she is now” he says, looking almost ashamed.
“Oh poor Anita” I say feeling sad for her.
“I hate to say it, but if I’m honest it’s a relief. She was like an addict. We had no relationship. Her only love was that ballet. We barely saw each other and when we did, she’d only ever talk about the performances” he says sadly.
“Why didn’t you leave her?” asks Calix.
“I wanted to. I had to stop myself everyday from calling her to say this wasn’t working. But I felt sympathetic towards her. She’s a shattered human, as am I myself, but I channel it into a better form than she does. I needed to protect her, from something like this happening. I guess it wasn’t enough. If I didn’t have Black Ball, I would end up the same as her” he says.
“I’m sorry Freddie, really I am. I knew something was wrong when Anita didn’t come. Unless she was at the ballet, I could think of no other reason for her to miss the meeting. I always feared this would happen to her. I saw her eyes at the ballet. I could see she had become a zombie, a shadow” says Calix, sadly.
“We all knew it would happen one day. The only person who didn’t was probably Anita herself. She believes herself to be a Prima-Ballerina, not a woman having a nervous breakdown because she was never the girl she thought shed be” says Frederick.
“Do you think that they can help her?” I ask, trying to see the situation from a positive angle.
“No. Its kind of a taboo to ever talk about that place, but unofficially everyone in this city knows that the hospital is where people go to die-metaphorically, if not literally. Its for those with no hope. Those who are too broken to even be broken citizens. It’s a prison, not a hospital” he says strongly.
“Frederick we must help her. What you say about that place is true and we cant leave her there. Anita is troubled, I wont deny it, but being in a place surrounded by people who are much worse than she is isn’t going to help her” says Calix.
“But what can we do? They’ll never let her out. They don’t let anyone out” says Frederick.
“We’ll have to break her out. She needs us, or she’ll be stuck there forever” says Calix, sounding worried.
Frederick, Calix and I get into the back of the Rolls-Royce and Alfred is instructed to drive us to the Black Hospital. He doesn’t question this command, but answers simply “Very well, Your Majesty”.
The Black Hospital is situated at the top of a hill. As we drive nearer, the surroundings become more sinister. Crows line the roads and high walls block every escape route. The gate to the hospital is locked and a sign reads ‘No Entry or Exit’. It feels more like a high security prison than a hospital.
“How are we supposed to get in Calix?” I ask.
Calix, for once, looks clueless.
“How do the visitors get in?” asks Calix, baffled.
“There are no visitors. I phoned this morning. They wont let me see her” says Frederick hopelessly.
As we all stare helplessly at the lock on the gate, Alfred steps out of the car.
“Are you troubled by the lock Your Majesty?” asks Alfred.
“Yes. We cant get in Alfred” Calix says.
“I hope you don’t think that I’m interfering in your affairs Your Highness, but I can quite easily pick that lock if I had a small pin” says Alfred modestly.
“Really Alfred? That would be amazing. Where can I find a pin? We’ll have to go back to the palace to get one” says Calix irritated.
“I have a hair grip” I say, removing a light brown hair pin which was camouflaged in my hair.
“Brilliant Seren. Will this do Alfred?” asks Calix, handing it to Alfre
d.
“I think this might just do…the trick” he says as the open lock falls to the ground.
“Alfred, you are a genius! Where did you learn to do that?” asks Calix, impressed by Alfred’s hidden devious side.
“The King likes to make sure I’m prepared for all possible circumstances Your Majesty” says Alfred professionally and humbly.
I smile and we walk through the gate. Alfred remains behind with the car, although I think it would be useful to have him with us.
“Okay, be very quiet everyone .Remember we are not supposed to be here” whispers Calix.
The moon shines brightly, illuminating everything and usually it makes me feel safe, but not here. The very building is traumatic to look at, as though it holds the memory of every patient past and present ,their desperation to escape entrenched in its walls.
As we get closer ,I realize there are bars on every window. I hear distant cries of ‘Help, help me’ and someone frantically rattling the bars. ‘Let me out’.
“Is that Anita?” I ask.
“It could be anyone. Who would want to stay locked in there?” says Frederick, his eyes gleaming with a distant terror.
“This is such a horrible place. A house of shame and anguish. If Anita’s dream wasn’t dead already, it certainly will be here” says Calix looking shocked, like he didn’t expect this hospital to be so awful.
“It’s a living death. Its like they’ve buried those people alive. I don’t think they are screaming because they are mad, I think they are screaming because they are trapped and know they will never get out” I say, short of breath.
I didn’t expect to feel so afraid or hopeless, but being near this hospital make me feel exactly that. Even in a graveyard there is a sense of peace, but here there is only torment and agony.
“How are we to know which room she is in? There are so many windows, many on the second and third floors. We should have brought a ladder with us” says Frederick.
“I agree. We really haven’t thought this through. How are we going to get Anita out of this horrid place?” I ask.
“I don’t know. Lets try calling for her first. That’s the most obvious and easiest step” says Calix.
“Wait! What about the hospital staff, they are bound to hear us and then they’ll know we are here and we’ll have to leave without Anita” says Frederick, sounding alarmed.
“Okay .Stupid plan. Seren, do you have any ideas?” he asks.
“Actually Calix, I do. It struck me all of a sudden that the only thing Anita pays attention to and cares about is ballet” I say, believing my plan to be that of a mastermind.
“And?” asks Calix, not understanding the relevance.
“If we play ballet music, or if I pretend to be a ballerina, maybe she’ll come to the window and we’ll at least know which room she’s in” I say confidently.
“That’s a good plan. Although I don’t have any ballet music and I think creating any noise would be a disaster, so try dancing Seren please!” says Frederick.
“I’ll dance, if you two do as well. But how will she know we are dancing if she cant hear the music?” I ask.
“I’ll hazard a guess the rooms in there are tiny, if she isn’t already at the window, our dancing will draw her there. Any movement will make her curious .She’ll have nothing better to do than observe what’s going on” says Calix.
“What if she’s sleeping?” I ask
“She may be. But its worth a shot. Come on ,I have no better ideas” says Calix, as he leaps into movement, passing quite readily as a male ballet dancer. Graceful, supple, beautiful.
Frederick clearly isn’t comfortable dancing, but he joins in nonetheless, showing his commitment to Anita. I have no idea how to dance. I twirl around, pointing my toes, trying to remember whatever it was I learnt when my Mother took me to ballet classes aged four.
Suddenly I become aware of a white figure standing at the first floor hospital window. I feel panicked that it might be a nurse, but I twirl with glee when I realize its Anita. Frederick has also noticed. I tap Calix who is dancing wildly and hasn’t yet realized she’s there. Anita stares intently, entranced as she was at the Black Ballet. I’ve never seen her look so awful. Her usually perfectly styled hair hangs long, greasy and lank at her waist. Frederick walks to the window, she stares blankly like she doesn’t recognize him, like he’s blocking the view of the ballet.
“Anita. Its okay. I’m here now, we’ve come to rescue you” says Frederick.
He turns to face us.
“How am I going to get these bars off the window?” asks Frederick.
Calix and Frederick spend the next half hour pulling frantically at the bars. I act as a look out, whilst continuing my ballet moves whenever Anita walks away from the window, in case she calls a member of staff.
She clearly is obsessed by ballet. Sometimes she begins to look tired, bored or confused but when I start dancing she becomes alive, a wildfire ignited in her eyes.
“This would have been easier if we’d brought the car” says Calix.
“Yes but they’d hear that” says Frederick.
Suddenly, both Calix and Frederick fall backwards as the bars have finally been yanked off the window. Anita continues her blank ,bewildered stare.
“Okay, we need Anita to step back from the window” says Calix covered in mud, holding a large rock in his hand.
“I don’t consider myself a vandal who indulges in criminal damage but in this case I’ll make an exception” he says.
I stop dancing. We hide and wait so that Anita will get bored and walk away from the window. When she finally does, dancing around the room (tall and elegant like a new born gazelle despite her un-brushed hair), Calix throws the rock.
Alarms go off, seemingly everywhere. The window is smashed. Frederick jumps through and grabs a screaming Anita.
He carries her, as we all run faster than we thought ourselves ever capable of, across the lawn, away from the nightmare hospital. As we do, I can hear voices behind us.
“Stop them”!
“They are kidnapping a patient”!
And I realize they think we are the cruel people, doing a bad deed. They think they are helping those people and that’s difficult to come to terms with.
“My legs feel like they are going to drop off” I say to Calix, who nods in agreement.
Frederick has a ruthless determination in his eyes, the same look he has when he’s playing a Black Ball game. Anita is crying, but she’s looking at Frederick lovingly this time, like she knows who he is and is happy he’s here.
We run through the gate with the picked lock. Alfred sees us and starts the car, presumably realizing we are in a great hurry. Calix gets in the front. I go in the back with Anita and Frederick.
“Oh Frederick. I’m so glad you saved me from that dreadful prison. I thought I’d die there” says Anita, hugging him. Even though her hair is a mess and she has a long white nightgown on, she looks beautiful, like a mannequin or porcelain doll.
The car screeches, taking off at an alarming speed. As we drive further on, I start to hear a siren. I look behind and I can see that a black ambulance is chasing us.
“They’re after us. Drive faster Alfred please” says Calix.
“Right, Your Majesty” nods Alfred, cool and calm as ever, showing no emotion, only following his order.
“They’ll know who we are Calix. This is the royal Rolls Royce. They’ll see your number plate” I say, concerned.
“I don’t care Seren. I just care that Anita is safe. Besides I’m the Prince. Now I’ve seen that hospital for myself, I want some big changes brought about” says Calix seriously.
I did forget momentarily that Calix was no ordinary criminal. He could shut that hospital tomorrow if he wanted to.
“Are we going to see the ballet?” asks Anita, hopefully.
“No Anita. We’re going home. Forget about the ballet please.” says Fredrick in despair that even after all she’s been thr
ough ,its still all she cares about.
Alfred cuts rapidly down a little lane and we lose the ambulance.
“Just taking a shortcut” he reassures the passengers.
“To the ballet?” enquires Anita and this time she is ignored.
We drop Anita and Frederick off at Frederick’s penthouse apartment.
“Are you sure you’ll be okay?”, asks Calix.
“I will .I’ll take care of Anita, don’t worry” says Frederick, still carrying her. His determination evident in his dark eyes.
“Call immediately if anything goes wrong” says Calix forcefully.
“If they show up asking to have her back you mean. Yes, I’ll call. But I’ll take care of myself” he says, fiercely independent, as ever.
Calix climbs into the back of the car with me.
“This day has certainly been eventful” he says, as Alfred drives slowly.
“Indeed. I wont lie, I found it comical to be in a car chase with an ambulance” I giggle.
“Me too. I was glad I was in the front of the car, because I was sniggering as we drove away from the hospital. Frederick would have hated that, he takes everything very seriously” says Calix.
Calix gets Alfred to drive me home.
“Do you think Anita will ever return to her usual self or do you think she’s finally snapped”? I ask him, still amazed at her rapid downward spiral.
“Well I was astonished at how bad a state she was in when we saw her at the hospital. I wasn’t expecting her to be so lost and bewildered, I felt certain that the real Anita was gone for good but when we started to drive away ,I could see fragments of her personality resurface. I think there is hope for her. She just needs support and to be around people like Frederick who have her best interests at heart. As long as she’s away from the hospital of doom, I think that’s all that matters” he smiles.
“Yes, I think she’ll improve now she’s away from there. Thanks for giving me such an exciting and unforgettable day Calix. As scary as it was ,it certainly gave me an adrenaline rush like no other being chased by nurses and running what felt like a marathon on hospital grounds” I say smiling, as I depart from the car and kiss Calix goodbye.