Destined to Change

by Harley, Lisa M.

  She stood up and kissed me. “Did I do okay?” She asked with a giggle. I pushed her back onto the bed and settled between her legs.

  “Yeah, babe...you did really okay.” I nipped on one nipple, while I massaged the other with my fingers. She was arching her back and she had her hands in my hair. I kissed a trail between her breasts. When I got to her belly, I gently kissed it and caressed it. I looked up into her eyes and she was smiling at me.

  “I know the baby is yours Jaxon. In my heart I know it.” I couldn’t think about it right now. I couldn’t get my hopes up, but that would make me the happiest fucking man alive.

  I sat up on my knees and started to pull her panties down. She took a deep breath. “You, okay?” I asked. She gave me that look that I had missed so much. The look that said I love you and I trust you.

  Then she said, “I’m wonderful, Jaxon. Really, really wonderful.”

  I finished pulling her panties off and threw them onto the floor. I crawled up her body, placing light kisses all the way up to her lips.

  When I got to her lips, I kissed her, “I’m gonna love you gentle, okay?”

  She nodded and I started to press into her. Our eyes were locked. Those beautiful brown eyes were melting my heart. I moved very slowly. I was making love to her. This wasn’t sex...this was love. We both needed this. We made love all afternoon. So sweet and gentle. Both of us so happy. I never wanted the afternoon to end.

  Loralei

  I was so happy after our afternoon together. I couldn’t wait for Jaxon to pick me up for our date tonight. I took a shower and put on some jeans and a white lacey blouse. I left my hair down and was ready to go, when I heard a knock at the door.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked Eric, who was standing at my door.

  “I need to talk to you, Lor. I’ve got some apologizing to do.”

  I motioned for him to come in and he took a seat on the couch. I walked over and sat down on the opposite side of the couch. Eric was looking down at his boots and wringing his hands.

  “I’m so sorry, Lor. I’m so damn sorry for everything.” He said with a tear streaming down his cheek.

  I reached over and placed my hand on his arm. I had known Eric my whole life. He had always been like a brother to me. I couldn’t stand to see him hurting.

  “What’s going on, Eric? What are you sorry for?”

  He looked up at me and said, “I’m sorry for the way I treated Jaxon. Emma told me he was back in town. I just want you to know how wrong I was to butt into your life like that. You are one of the smartest, strongest women I know. So if you say he’s good enough for you, then by God he is. I shouldn’t have said a damn word about him.”

  “What else is going on, Eric? It has to be more than that.” I asked as I brushed a tear from his cheek.

  He was sobbing as he said, “I’m so sorry for that night, Lor. I’m so sorry for making ya’ll come back and get me. I’m so sorry for being drunk and gettin’ my best friend killed. My best friend, Lor.” I leaned over and hugged him, crying right along with him.

  “Dec was like my family. And ya’ll were so happy and I ruined your happiness. Lor, I tried so damn hard to be like a father to the twins. I tried to make up for the horrible pain I caused ya’ll, but I could never do enough. I could never fix what I did.”

  “Eric, it was an accident. It was just a terrible accident. If anyone is to blame, it’s me. I was driving, not you.” We were both sobbing and holding each other.

  We let go and Eric said, “Lor, I never told you this. I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Right after the accident, I pulled Dec out of the truck. He was still alive, Lor. He said something to me. He had me make a promise and I’ve screwed it up, so bad.”

  “What? He was alive? Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you say anything to me, Eric? What did he say?” I was pleading.

  “He asked me to take care of you and keep you safe. He asked me to make sure you found someone to love. He asked me to make sure you weren’t sad for him. Dec knew he wasn’t gonna make it, Lor. He knew what was happening. I promised him. And the way I treated you over Jaxon, I am ashamed. You deserve to be happy. That’s what Declan wanted.”

  “I loved him with everything I had, Eric. He was my whole life and those babies were the only things that kept me going after the accident. Accidents happen. It wasn’t your fault, or mine. It was just life. He wasn’t meant to live past seventeen. I haven’t lived in so many years, Eric. I have been so lonely. And I’ve found someone who makes me happy and makes the kids happy. I love him, Eric.”

  Eric grabbed my hand in his and said, “That’s why I’m here, Lor. I wanted to tell you I was an asshole. If he makes you happy, that’s all that matters. I love you and I love the kids. I will always be here for all of you.”

  “Eric, you and Emma are my family and you always will be.”

  “Dec wanted you to be happy, Lor. You do what you need to do to make sure you are. I will support you always. But if he hurts you again, I will have to kick his ass.” We laughed together, through our tears.

  After that we sat for a long time sharing some of our favorite Declan memories. It was sad and happy at the same time. We both loved him so much. We needed this.

  With everything that had just happened, I forgot all about my date with Jaxon, until I heard a knock at the door. I answered it and Jaxon wrapped me in his arms. Eric walked up behind us and Jaxon let go of me and stepped back.

  Eric reached his hand out to Jaxon and said, “I was an asshole. Can we try to forget it or forgive?”

  Jaxon looked at me and then back at Eric. He shook his hand. “I know you were just looking out for her. I just want you to know, I love her and the kids. I’m not going anywhere.”

  Eric looked at me and said, “I know ya’ll love each other. I’m happy that you make her happy.” He leaned toward Jaxon and whispered, “But if you ever hurt her again, they’ll never find your body.” He slapped Jaxon on the back, gave me a hug, and said his goodbyes.

  Jaxon said, “Well, that was interesting.”

  “We needed to work some stuff out. This was never about you, Jaxon. He had a lot of guilt about Declan. We talked it out and I think he’s okay now.”

  “I’m glad ya’ll talked about Declan. I think you both needed that.”

  I wrapped my arms around him and said, “I love you, Jaxon. Thank you for loving me.” I leaned up and kissed him before we headed out to the truck.

  He drove Uncle Jake’s truck since we were going out to the pond. He held my hand all the way there. I was sitting right next to him, but I felt like I couldn’t get close enough. I leaned in and kissed his neck.

  “Now, don’t start that, or we won’t make it to the pond.” He gave me a sexy grin.

  I started to scoot away. “Yes, sir.”

  He grabbed my leg and pulled me back next to him. “I didn’t tell you to move, I just said stop kissing me.”

  When we got to the pond he got out of the truck. “Wait here a sec, I have a little surprise planned.”

  He walked around toward the back of the truck. I felt him jump up in the truck bed. I turned to watch him. “You just keep those pretty little eyes looking straight ahead. What part of surprise did you not understand?”

  I laughed and turned back around.

  I felt him jump out of the truck and then he was opening the truck door. He extended his hand out to me. “Your surprise is ready.”

  I put my hand in his and he grabbed me in a big hug. We started back to the back of the truck. He jumped up and put his arms out to pull me up. He had laid tons of quilts and pillows all over the back of the truck. He had lit candles and placed them up on the roof of the cab of the truck. Those with the moonlight were all the lighting we needed. He sat down and had me sit down beside him. “Your mom packed dinner for us. She really wanted to help me out.” He opened up a box my mom had given him. She had made my favorite meal...fried chicken, potato salad, and her delicious homemade rolls. She h
ad also packed diet coke...my go-to drink.

  “Have I told you lately, how much I love your Mom?” Jaxon asked as he was getting out the plates and silverware.

  “She is pretty awesome. If it wasn’t for her, this might not have happened. If she hadn’t tricked me into going into town with you that Sunday, we might not have fallen in love.”

  He stopped what he was doing and grabbed my hands in his.

  “I thank your mom for pushing you that day, but I wouldn’t have been able to stay away from you. The minute I saw you out in the field, I knew I wanted you. It was like they write about in those romance novels...it was like a current zapping through me. I just felt like...well, it was you. You were what I had been waiting for. And, honestly, it scared the hell out of me.”

  I couldn’t stop giggling, these pregnancy hormones had my mood all over the place.

  “You know how I feel about you laughing at me,” he said, and I broke out into full-blown laughter.

  He looked so confused, he had his eyebrow raised at me. “What is so damn funny? I just laid everything out for you and you’re cracking up.”

  I tried so hard to stop laughing. I gained enough composure to say, “You just told me you read romance novels.” And then the laughter started again. Was he blushing? It sure looked like he was.

  “Where do you think I learn all those amazing things that I do to you? I didn’t hear you complaining about it earlier today.”

  Well, that changed everything. My laughter stopped and I caught his gaze. His eyes were smoldering.

  I licked my lips. “Maybe we can eat later?” He nodded and kissed me. We made love, and it was amazing. I was so glad that he read romance novels.

  Chapter 17

  Cade

  I’m not gonna lie, the past two weeks had been torture. Seeing her with him, knowing she was pregnant with my baby. The baby I had dreamed about for years. The baby inside the woman that I had fallen so damn hard for. It was fucking tearing me up inside. And there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. He had won. She had always been his. I was just here. I was the distraction she needed to realize how much she loved the asshat.

  I had stayed at Harper Farms, but I was spendin’ most of my time out workin’. I had ventured into town a couple of times. Even spent a little time gettin’ to know some lovely ladies at the tavern in town. I had met this chick named Mare, yeah, just like a horse. Damn she was hot. Right then and there, she asked me to take her up against the wall in the back of the bar. I couldn’t fuckin’ do it...but damn she was temptin’.

  Lor was havin’ the test done tomorrow and they had said we would know in a couple of days. I wanted that baby to be mine more than anything in this world. I had always dreamed about having a family. A sweet little toe-head girl following me around on the ranch. Teaching her everything I knew about horses and workin’ the farm. I wanted that, damn I wanted that. And I wanted it with Lor. I knew that wasn’t happenin’, but a man could dream, right?

  Loralei

  Tomorrow was the day. It was the day that I would have the test to find out if the baby I was carrying was Jaxon’s. Jaxon and I had been spending all of our time together since the date at the pond.

  We were living as a family, mostly. Jaxon wasn’t spending the night, but he was eating dinner with us almost every night.

  While Cade was here, we agreed that it would be better if he didn’t work on the farm. So he would come by in the morning and tell the kids good morning before they went to school. Some days we would have lunch together at my house or Jake’s.

  I was spending a lot of time trying to avoid Cade. I didn’t want to see him, until I knew if he was the father. We had some awkward run-ins when Jaxon came to visit me in my office, but we had survived.

  I was out in the field, checking out the new cattle we had received, when I saw him. Cade was walking right toward me. “Hey, hon. How ya feeling?” He placed his hand on my upper arm.

  “I’m feelin’ real good. No morning sickness or anything. I had it so bad with the twins. I was pretty worried about it this time, but so far, so good.”

  He looked down at his boots while he was kicking the dirt around. “Uh, can I go with ya for the test tomorrow?”

  That really surprised me. “You really don’t need to Cade. Jax...uh, I mean, I won’t be alone.”

  He looked up and his eyes met mine. He looked so sad. “I know he’ll be with ya. I just kinda hoped I could be there too.”

  I couldn’t really tell him no, he had every right to be there. “Sure, if you want to be there, I don’t have a problem with it. My appointment is at two o’clock. Do you wanna meet us at the clinic in town?”

  He gave me a little sideways smile. “Yeah, hon, that would be great. Thanks.”

  Jaxon

  This morning I had gotten up and gone to Lor’s to help her see the kids off to school, like I had been doing for the past couple of weeks. I hadn’t spent the night yet, but Lor and I had decided it would be best to not do that for awhile. We needed the kids to be used to me being there for a bit longer.

  “Your appointment is at two o’clock, right babe?” I asked Lor as she walked into the living room and sat down on the couch beside me.

  “About that, are you sure you wanna go with me? You really don’t have to.”

  “How could you ask me that? After the past couple of weeks. I thought we were in this together. I thought you realized how much you mean to me? I will always be here for you and the baby, no matter what.”

  “We are in this together, but Cade asked me yesterday if he could go with me.”

  “And you don’t want me to go, but you want him to take you? Seriously?” I couldn’t believe she didn’t want me there. It hit me hard. I thought we were in this together. Maybe she was having second thoughts about me and the type of father I could be to the baby. Maybe she wanted Cade.

  “No, Jaxon. That’s not what I’m saying at all. Of course, I want you there with me. I just know it will be awkward for both of you to be there. And honestly, it’s just a test. A little needle...not a big deal.”

  “I’m going to be there with you. If he is there, I won’t have a problem with it. He might though.”

  “He knows you’ll be there. He will meet us at the clinic.” She said this as she stood up and started to walk away.

  I grabbed her around the waist and pulled her onto my lap. “Do you have to work today? Or can you stay in with me until it’s time for the appointment?”

  She smiled that beautiful smile. “That’s the beauty of being the boss. I don’t have to work if something better comes up.” She shifted around on my lap.

  “Something better is definitely coming up, babe.” We spent the rest of the morning making out like teenagers on the couch. It was one of the best mornings of my life.

  Loralei

  Jaxon and I made it to the clinic a little before two o’clock. Cade was waiting for us in the parking lot. We got out of the jeep and he walked over toward us. He never said a word, just tipped his hat, and gestured for us to walk ahead of him. Needless to say, it was a little awkward walking into the clinic with Jaxon and Cade. I believe it was pretty clear to everyone, why I was there. Most women didn’t bring two guys with them to see their OB/GYN.

  The appointment went by without incident. Jaxon and Cade shared a few intense stare downs, but basically it all went pretty well.

  The doctor told me we should have the results in about three days. These were going to be the longest three days of my life…

  Three days later

  My phone was ringing off the wall. I ran to answer it, a little out of breath, “Uh, hello.”

  It was the nurse from the clinic. “Ms. Harper, we have the results of your test. We don’t normally do this over the phone. Can you come in and pick them up?”

  Really? Did she have to ask? “Of course, I’m on my way.”

  The kids were already off to school, so I jumped in the jeep and headed to the clinic. I decided t
o do this alone. I didn’t need Jaxon or Cade with me. I needed to find this out on my own. It would be difficult, but I needed to tell the father myself.

  I was almost sick by the time I got to the clinic. I hadn’t had morning sickness the entire pregnancy, but right then I was so nauseous. I just knew I would puke before I could read the results. I went into the clinic and the nurse handed me a plain white envelope with BABY HARPER typed on the front of it.

  I walked out to the jeep holding the envelope. I heard my cell chirping and saw that Jaxon had been calling me. I couldn’t talk to him right now. I had to see what the results said.

  I opened the envelope and tried to read the results.

  The first two pages were a bunch of graphs and numbers. The grid was titled: “A” and “B”. I read on and realized that Jaxon was “A” and Cade was “B”. Thank God there was a title on the second page that spelled that out. I got to the last page and it said: Paternity Verified, and that was followed by a letter. I finally knew who the father was.

  Cade

  The past three days had about killed me. I couldn’t eat, sleep, nothin’. Today should be the day that we find out. I just needed to know. I needed to get back to my life either way. I had been neglecting everything and that just wasn’t somethin’ I did.

  Since my parents had died, that ranch was my life. Clay and I had been away for too long. If the baby was mine we were goin’ to have to figure somethin’ out. I didn’t know how we were gonna do it, but I wouldn’t be away from my kid.

  When I heard the knock on the door, I about jumped outta my hide. I got up and headed for the door. When I opened it, I knew the question had been answered.