Fulfillment

by Golland, K. M.

  “Dare,” she answered excitedly.

  Nate quickly jumped in again. “Fart.”

  “Nate!” I exclaimed. Charli let off another one. “Geezus, Charli!” How does she freakin’ do that?

  Bryce was laughing hysterically while looking between me and the kids. I placed my head in my hands, amazed at Charli’s now apparent talent for breaking wind on cue.

  “My turn.” Nate shuffled on the spot. I had the urge to demand he fart, but that would only detriment us all in the long run.

  “Alright, truth or dare?” I asked him.

  “Truth,” he replied confidently.

  Excellent, I may just like this game yet. “Did you eat that Brussels sprout, or did you give it to Bryce when I wasn’t looking?”

  He quickly glanced at Bryce and answered “Noooooo,” in a very drawn out, slow voice. I turned in Bryce’s direction, catching him frantically moving his head from side to side and telling Nate to say ‘no.’

  “Liar!” Charli shouted and pointed to Nate. “You have to do it again.”

  Nate huffed.

  “Okay.” I looked at Bryce and squinted my eyes with a silent message that he was about to get found out, then I looked back at Nate, opening my eyes wide with warning that he better not lie. “Did Bryce say that Danny could drive you to school in the limo?”

  Nate’s open eyes broadened then he screwed up his face.

  “Nate?” I probed.

  He closed his eyes then nodded twice.

  I pointed to Bryce. “Ha, I knew it. I knew it.”

  He tried to grab my finger in an attempt to bite it then winked at Nate. “My turn and I choose truth this time.” He looked directly at Charli with a knowing smile.

  She didn’t hesitate and quickly jumped in, asking the question she attempted moments ago. “Are you going to ask Mummy to marry you?”

  “Yes,” he snapped out before I even had a moment to break their alliance.

  “When?” she blurted out quickly.

  “Soon,” he answered, just as fast.

  “How soon?”

  “Charli!” I interrupted. Nate laughed.

  “Soon, soon,” Bryce continued.

  “Bryce!” I poked him. He is just as bad as both of my kids.

  “Are you going to have a baby?” Charli continued. Whoa! Okay, game over.

  “I think that’s enough of truth or dare for tonight.” I switched my tone of voice to the game’s-up-I’m-now-serious one.

  “Awww,” they all whined.

  “Maybe. Would that be okay?” Bryce continued to answer Charli’s question, ignoring my request that we end the game before the baby-in-my-uterus cat was let out of the bag.

  “Yeah. That would be awesome,” Charli added. “I love babies, but only if it’s a girl baby. Boys are crap sometimes.” She poked her tongue out at Nate. He responded by throwing his dirty socks at her. “See what I mean? They are disgusting. Yuck!”

  “What about you Nate? Would that be okay?” Bryce queried my son. Oh Shit! Do I want to hear this answer?

  “I guess...but aren’t you too old, Mum?”

  “No. I’m not too old, and anyway, it’s bed time. Come and give me a kiss then hop back into bed.”

  Both Nate and Charli climbed onto our bed and gave me a kiss. Charli even climbed over to Bryce and placed a peck on his cheek then bumped fists with him, in a modern high-five gesturing kind of way. I shook my head at the realisation that he had successfully been able to infiltrate my children’s brains in order to have them side with him and gang up on me. I shot a baffled smile at him, turned off the light and snuggled into to his chest.

  He wrapped his arms around me, lightly kissed my neck then whispered into my ear. “I had a really great time today, thank you for sharing your family with me.”

  I smiled although I knew he couldn’t see it. “What’s mine is yours, remember?”

  His grip tightened.

  ***

  Lying in bed the following morning had me thinking about what Bryce said before we had drifted off to sleep. I realised that the reason he’d confessed to having such a great time the day before was because he had missed out on having similar family experiences himself. Where I took our family gatherings for granted or saw them as everyday events and not giving them much emphasis, he had thrived on them—enjoying that contented feeling he’d never had the privilege to be surrounded by.

  I hugged him incredibly tight, loving him for being in my life; loving him for having such a great relationship with my kids; loving him for loving me, and loving him because he deserved it. My tight squeezing stirred him from his sleep, filling me with joy at being able to stare at him as he returned to the conscious world—usually it was the other way around. I thoroughly enjoyed watching him wake, watching his face come to life when his eyes met mine.

  “Hey, Mr. Clark. Fancy helping me be an Easter Bunny?” I whispered.

  “Sure. As long as we can breed like one?” he whispered back.

  I giggled. “We already have.”

  He smiled with his eyes closed. “Mmmm.”

  “Come on, you.”

  We snuck out of the room to help hide all the Easter eggs that Mum, Jen and I had stashed away. Jen artistically hid foil covered chocolate bunnies in potted plants, on chairs and under tables. Jake arranged two chocolate bunnies on top of each other in a compromising position, and Bryce and I tossed handfuls of little foil covered chocolate eggs out onto the lawn. When we were all satisfied that our Easter Bunny duties were complete, we sat down at the dining table with well-earned cups of coffee and tea, then waited for the sleeping children to wake up.

  “Why is it that on Easter, Christmas and birthdays our little rascals sleep in?” Jen huffed. “I might as well go back to bed.” And on cue the twins started crying. She stood up and stretched. “Ahhh, they are just like clockwork.” She turned to Bryce and smiled at him, raising her eyebrows. “Bryce, do you want to give me a hand?” Jennifer, don’t you dare do anything stupid. I shot her a warning look.

  “Sure,” he said.

  Steve grinned and leaned back on his chair, glad he had been let off the hook. “Sweet,” he uttered, happily.

  “Don’t tell me you breastfeed too, Bryce,” my smartarse brother teased. I grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl and launched it at him. He caught it, and laughing, took a bite. “Thanks.”

  I looked to Bryce. “Whatever you do, don’t change Jack.”

  “Who said anything about changing them?” he answered, appearing to now regret his acceptance.

  “Come on.” Jen put her hands on his shoulders and ushered him toward the waiting bundles of cuteness—and their inevitable soiled nappies.

  Moments later, Jen returned to the room, smiling and holding the ‘blue one’. Bryce followed shortly after, his face half displaying adoration of the ‘pink one’ and half distaste.

  “Was that a set up?” he asked me.

  Jen cracked up laughing.

  “Was what a set up?” I asked, slightly confused.

  “Elise’s nappy was far from clean,” he blurted out as he bounced her on his hip.

  “Oh. Sorry...but shit happens...literally.” I giggled at my lame joke and walked over to him, stopping to take Elise into my arms. “Did you give Uncle Bryce a nice Easter present?” I babbled to my niece.

  The entire room fell silent at my choice of words, and I very quickly felt as though I had five pairs of eyes burrowing into my back. I looked up at Bryce who was standing directly in front of me, his face elated—thank goodness.

  “Yes, she did. So next time, I choose Jack.” He kissed me on the top of the head and proceeded to sit back at the table, unperturbed at the fact I had just declared him a surrogate uncle. My family, too, continued their discussions and all was well.

  Nate, Charli and Olivia woke up shortly after and scoured the gardens surrounding Mum and Dad’s house for treats the Easter Bunny had left behind. When they were sure all traces of foil-covered chocolate had
been found, we all sat down and enjoyed another meal together—this one just as entertaining as the night before. After lunch, we sadly said our goodbyes with kisses to the cheeks, warm embraces and promises to see one another soon. Jake had shook Bryce’s hand and warned him—in a friendly manner—to take care of me, and not because he would have to answer to my brother if he didn’t. Instead, because he’d have to answer to me, as I apparently was the scariest one of us all—Bryce tended to agree.

  ***

  Easter Sunday night was spent at the apartment with Lucy, Nic and Baby Alexander. Bryce was once again so natural when it came to handling a baby; it was an incredible turn on. I couldn’t help but formulate a picture in my mind of him holding, hugging, kissing and fussing over our baby. And as a result of this beautiful piece of imagery foresight, I had a ridiculously large smile plastered on my face.

  “You seem happy,” Lucy smirked as she gave me a nudge while we made a cup of coffee.

  “I am, very happy. Your brother is essentially all one could ever wish for in a man, and I can’t for the life of me remember making that wish or being lucky enough to deserve it being granted.” I looked up from the bench while stirring the mug, noticing Bryce enthralled in a game of peek-a-boo with Charli and Alexander.

  “True love is not the result of a wish, Alexis. It is found by those who have open eyes. Unfortunately, so many people are blind—and because of that—will never experience it.” She put her mug to her lips and blew gently. “I will be forever grateful to you for opening your eyes. My brother deserves the love he has found with you.”

  I turned to face her, a small tear in my eye. I also stupidly placed my hand on my abdomen. Her eyes twinkled and her mouth opened, and that’s when I realised what I had done. So I said the first stupid thing that came to my mind.

  “Oooh, I think I have a bit of wind.” Nice, Alexis! After that heartfelt declaration, the first thing she hears you say is you have wind.

  She squinted her eyes at me ever so mildly then sipped her coffee. “Better out than in I’ve always said.”

  She picked up Nic’s cup, smiled at me and walked back into the lounge area. Shit! Crap! Balls! I picked up Bryce’s mug and followed her, feeling like a bloody idiot with a flatulence problem. I handed him the mug and sat down beside him on the sofa, red-faced and morbidly embarrassed. Lucy was still smiling at me. Fuck, I think she knows.

  I diverted my guilty you’ve-busted-me face and addressed my kids. “I hate to break up your game, but Charli and Nate, your father will be here bright and early in the morning to pick you both up. So it’s bedtime. Say goodnight and get yourselves ready for bed. I will be up to tuck you both in shortly.”

  “Is RJ gonna be there? Because if he is, I’m not going,” Nate said firmly.

  “No, he’s not. But you are going to have to meet him soon Nate. You can’t avoid it forever, and besides, you will probably really like him.” I kissed him on the head as he fist-bumped Bryce.

  “I doubt it,” Nate murmured.

  “He likes caramel and so do you. And he barracks for the Bombers like we do,” Charli offered. I winked at her and gave her a kiss, again while she and Bryce fist-bumped.

  “Whatever.” Nate shrugged his shoulders and headed upstairs after saying goodnight to Lucy, Nic, and Alexander—Charli right behind him.

  ***

  The next morning, Rick was at the apartment at the crack of dawn like he said he would be. I had barely registered the daylight when the buzzer to the foyer sounded. Nic, Lucy, and Alexander were still sound asleep. The kids were finishing packing their bags for their stay with Rick, and Bryce was in the shower.

  I opened the door still in my satin nightie and robe. “Hi,” I said as I let him in. “Since when did you become a morning person?”

  “Since you left me.” His response was flat, with a cutting tone.

  I glared at him. “Well, it doesn’t agree with you.” Bite me and I’ll bite back.

  “So what the hell was that the other day?”

  “What?” I asked bemused.

  “Kicking Claire out of my house.”

  Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. I walked into the kitchen, motioning him to follow me. I didn’t need anyone else hearing this conversation, which was obviously about to get nasty. Once he was around the corner and I was satisfied that we were alone, I answered him.

  “For starters, Rick, it is not your house until you pay me for it.” He gave me a hostile look. “And secondly, she was wearing my fucking dress. How did you expect me to react?”

  “Oh, I don’t know...maybe like an adult. You didn’t even let her get her shoes.” Really? Oh! Bahaha that’s fucking funny. No, Alexis, it’s not.

  “She surprised me, Rick. I was not expecting her there. I just wanted to get the rest of my things.”

  “You took the couch cushions, Alexis. What the fuck is wrong with you?”

  “Nothing, they are my couch cushions. I chose them. I bought them.”

  “You’re acting like a child.”

  “Yeah, well you’d know all about that,” I yelled at him

  “Are you finished?” he asked quietly.

  “With you? Yes. I don’t even know you anymore, Rick.”

  “I’m not the one who has changed, Lexi.”

  “Yeah I guess you’re right. Maybe I just didn’t know the real you in the first place.”

  “Don’t label us and our marriage as not ‘real’. You’re mad, I get that, but you and I were ‘real’. You can be angry with me all you want—I deserve it—but you can’t take it out on Claire like you did. You’ve moved on—clearly. I’m just trying to do the same.”

  I moved to the kettle and switched it on. “Well, I’ve made an appointment to see Berny. I suggest you find a lawyer as well. We both can’t truly move on until we’ve legally gone our separate ways.”

  “If that’s what you want, Alexis, fine. I’m done.”

  “Good. I was done a long time ago. I just didn’t know it.”

  Rick and I were staring each other down when Bryce walked in with Nate and Charli behind him.

  “Hi, Dad,” Charlie said with a small smile while looking from Rick’s face to mine. We both snapped out of our showdown and switched personalities.

  “My Princess, I’ve missed you.” He lifted her up. “Ready to go to Grandma and Grandpa’s?”

  “Yes,” she said excitedly.

  I blew Charli a kiss and cuddled Nate. “Have fun. I’ll see you after school tomorrow.”

  “Wednesday, after school on Wednesday if that is okay. I would really like to have them for the extra day this week considering I missed out over the weekend.”

  I breathed in deep and closed my eyes momentarily. Bryce came around behind me and put his hands on my shoulders. I exhaled.

  “That seems fair,” Bryce added. He gave my shoulders a gentle squeeze. “We’ll both pick you up after school on Wednesday. How does that sound?” he asked Nate and Charli.

  “In the limo?” Nate suggested.

  “No,” I said at the same time as Rick. Hang on a minute, where does he get off saying ‘no’ to the limo. I should say yes now! No, Alexis you’re just being bitter. “We’ll see you Wednesday.” I kissed Nate’s head.

  As they walked out into the foyer, I waved, then headed upstairs to my shower—my emotion-venting, steamed-filled, head-clearing shower.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Riding a rollercoaster of emotional highs and lows had been a regular occurrence for me over the past month—mainly riding the lows. Rick and I had continued to take nasty stabs at each other which afterwards left me feeling pained and angry, but more so incredibly hurt. The beautiful relationship we once shared was gone, seemingly never to return and it saddened me. I tried desperately to get back that calm, that blah feeling I had felt in the beginning when I had found out the truth about him and Claire, but for some reason I was just so angry now. Surely it was my hormones, it had to be.

  I hadn’t properly spoken to h
im since our 14th wedding anniversary, which had been one week ago when he sent me a text during that day:

  What do I say to you on a day like today? - Rick

  My response had been:

  Nothing, what can you say? - Alexis

  I’d never meant it to come across as nasty or harsh, instead, my intent had been more like ‘it is what it is, so maybe not say anything at all’.

  Rick obviously took it the wrong way and replied with:

  I can’t fucking win with you. I don’t know why I bother. - Rick

  It had made me feel completely awful the entire day, having been pissed off to the point where I had taken it out on Bryce which was completely uncalled for. After I had explained the significance of the day—which was no excuse for taking it out on him—we had made up with fiery sex on the stairs. Needless to say, his sexual ability to make my mind stop thinking about Rick and our anniversary was incredibly successful.

  Gareth had also triggered my emotional rollercoaster ride, because during the past week he had been unbelievably kind, and I guessed somewhat normal. Normal, to the point that sometimes when he was in my presence, I would forget that he suffered from DID in the first place. I was starting to think that maybe his medication and visits to Jessica were really helping him, which deep down I really wanted because, regardless of Gareth’s alters, Bryce really did love his cousin and felt that he owed him infinitely.

  With all the ups and downs with Rick, Gareth, and even Bryce to an extent—yes, he had still been overbearingly protective and aggravating at times—the main reasons for my feeling uptight, frustrated and angry were mainly due to the fact I was fourteen weeks pregnant and still keeping it a secret. It was increasingly stressful and difficult to do, especially around the kids. Thankfully, the time for our baby secret to be revealed had come. Tomorrow was my birthday, and Bryce had organised a party for me at the apartment, inviting our close friends and family. He had also organised hotel rooms for all of them to stay in which was not only convenient but wonderfully thoughtful. We planned to announce our happy news at the party, but not until we had let Nate and Charli know that they were going to have another brother or sister first.