Fulfillment

by Golland, K. M.

  Continuing my pathetic adolescent school girl giggling, I started humming “My Pony” while swaying my hips from side to side as I washed myself. I realised that Ginuwine’s song, and the visuals of Bryce creeping along the floor to me were going to be permanently etched onto my brain and inner eyelids. Awesome! Best birthday present, EVER!

  Shaking my head in disbelief at his devotion to please me—and the fact that he was a pretty good dancer—I quickly showered and got myself ready so that I could get to work and help him in any way that I could, knowing that he had a tonne of work to do. I put on my purple Versace jersey wrap dress, which adapted quite nicely to my slightly thicker waistline, and paired it with my divinely gorgeous purple Manolo Blahnik Kilis.

  I hopped along, putting my heels on as I walked to the top of the stairs, making sure they were secured nicely before I started to make my way down. As I took my third step, I felt a sudden surge of terror, a feeling of imbalance and dread as if my senses knew what was happening to me before my brain had a chance to convey the message. My heart stopped beating, and my breath paused as I realised I was falling forward rather quickly.

  My first instinct had me turning to the side to prevent tumbling face first, while reaching out and securing the railing with both hands. But as I gripped the safety rail, I felt a shocking surge of pain in my ankle, forcing me to let go and slip further down, losing the fight to stay upright. I slammed into the stairs, hitting my head and instantly feeling really strange before all went black.

  ***

  BRYCE

  I really needed to fucking hire more staff. Ever since Alexis strolled into my life like an angel, I had been up to my fucking neck in work. Why? Because she was just a major distraction in every possible kind of way, and because of that, I kept pushing my work aside just to spend time with her. I couldn’t help it, and it was only going to get worse, especially when the baby arrived.

  I didn’t want to spend day upon day working while the love of my life and our happy little family spent time with each other without me. No, fuck that. I had every intention to back off work and devote more time to what was more important. I had worked my arse off for a long time and I was now ready to reap the benefits.

  I picked up the phone and dialled Arthur.

  “Arthur Gordon, speaking.”

  “Arthur, its Bryce.”

  “Good morning, Bryce. What can I do for you?”

  “I need to set up a board meeting. Topic of agenda will be making you Senior Vice President.”

  Arthur cleared his throat. “That is certainly not what I expected you to say. Can I ask why?”

  “Arthur, Alexis is pregnant. I’m going to be a father. I need to relinquish some of my duties and free up some time so that I can be the best father and partner I can be. I can’t do that without your help.”

  “Oh...well...I see. Congratulations, Bryce. Good gracious, that was quick.”

  I chuckled at my late father’s best friend—my close friend, and the only man I had ever looked up to apart from my dad. “Thanks. It wasn’t planned, but we are beyond thrilled. I’m going to sign over an additional 6% stake in the company to you, giving you 15% in total. You will hold the title of Senior Vice President, Gareth will still remain Vice President with his 10% stake, and his duties will go unchanged. Your duties however, will increase. If you require a personal assistant to help with the additional work load then we will hire one. What do you say? I don’t trust anyone else, Arthur. Please say yes.” I waited for his answer. “Listen think about it and—”

  “No Bryce. Of course, I’ll do it. I am honoured, thank you.”

  “No. Thank you, Arthur.”

  “So, you’re gonna be a dad. I couldn’t be happier for you, Bryce, and I know your parents are somewhere up above, incredibly proud and smiling down on you.”

  I almost choked at the old man’s words. I respected Arthur and looked up to him more than he’d ever know, and his kind words and thoughts of my parents pierced my heart in a big way. “Thanks, Arthur. I hope you’re right. Listen, I’ve got to go. I will speak to you about the changes in a few days, okay?”

  “Of course.”

  I ended the phone call, stood up from my desk and walked over to the window, taking in the view of Port Phillip Bay. Would my parents be proud? I hoped so. I’d never really given much thought to the notion that they could be smiling down upon me. I liked that idea though. I liked the thought that they could somehow see me and Lucy all grown up and happy with families.

  I looked at my watch and noticed it was past 10 a. m. Alexis, you little sleeping beauty. The thought of her asleep on her stomach, her bare back visible and longing to be touched, stirred my need to go and see her. Fuck, the things she does to me. No wonder I am so far behind in work. I honestly didn’t care though. She made me so fucking happy, all I wanted was to be around her.

  A devilish smile appeared on my face as I made my way to the apartment door, already running ideas through my head on different ways I could wake her.

  ***

  I walked into the apartment and headed for the stairs. I didn’t register the sight before me at first, because it was so fucking terrifying that it just couldn’t be real. But it was.

  “Fuck! Geezus! Fuck! Alexis! No!”

  I ran the fastest my fucking legs could carry me and skidded to my knees where her crumpled body lie at the base of the steps. “Please don’t be dead! Fuck! No!”

  Adrenalin was coursing through me, and the first thing I did was check for a pulse. “Thank God.” She had a pulse and she was breathing. Gently, I lifted her head and noticed blood on my hand. “Fuck!”

  She made a murmuring noise, one of pain.

  “Hunny, you’re gonna be okay. I’m going to call an ambulance.”

  I grabbed my phone and dialled 000.

  “You have dialled 000 emergency. Do you need Police, Fire and Rescue or Ambulance?”

  “Ambulance, I need an ambulance now. My girlfriend has fallen down the stairs and she is unconscious. She is fourteen weeks pregnant. Her head is bleeding, and... Oh fuck, I think her leg is broken.”

  I’d seen some pretty horrific shit in my life but the angle at which her foot lay to her leg was not normal.

  “Is she breathing?” the operator asked, in a calm voice.

  “Yes. Yes, she is breathing. My name is Bryce Clark, and I own City Towers. We are in the penthouse. I have a helipad. Please send a chopper, now!”

  Alexis murmured again. I gently ran my hand down the side of her face. “It’s okay, my love, I’m right here.” I leaned over her, wanting to pick her up in my arms and hold her to me, but I knew not to touch her. I didn’t know if anything else was broken, she could have fractured her spine for all I knew.

  I looked over her with a bit more detail when I noticed the blood staining her dress in between her legs. “Oh, God. No.”

  The operator was still talking on the other end of the phone, but I couldn’t focus on a word she was saying. I stared down at Alexis and I lost control, taking hold of her hand and kissing it, crying and telling her that the paramedics were coming and that she was going to be fine. After that, it was all kind of a blur.

  ***

  Once at the hospital, my incoherent state of mind still remained. All I remembered was seeing her being wheeled away from me and into the emergency department, then feeling like my life had once again ended.

  A nurse lightly touched my arm. “Mr. Clark?” She guided me to a seat. “I’m so sorry that your wife is hurt.”

  I didn’t correct her mistake of Alexis’ title. To me, she was my wife; she was my life, and as soon as it was legally possible, I was going to marry her. We just had to get through this first. We had to.

  “Your wife is stable and she will be fine.” Oh, thank fuck. “She is on her way to Radiology to have an x-ray of her ankle which is clearly broken. She will also have a CT scan to check the severity of her head injury. Now, Mr. Clark...” she placed her hand on my shoulder, �
�I’m so terribly sorry to have to tell you this, but upon examination of your wife by the paramedics, they found evidence of an incomplete miscarriage.”

  I dropped my head into my hands, already knowing that was the case. Seeing the blood that had stained Alexis’ dress, kind of made it unmistakeable. It wasn’t any less painful to hear though.

  The nurse—I didn’t even know her name—gently squeezed the hand she had placed on my shoulder. “I’m so sorry. Is there anyone I can call for you?”

  I lifted my head. “No. That’s okay. I will call Alexis’ mum. Thank you.”

  “Okay then. There is a waiting room, just down there.” She nodded down the corridor. “Please help yourself to a drink. I will be at the nurse’s station if you need anything. As soon as your wife is out of surgery I will come and let you know.”

  I thanked her again then turned and headed for the waiting room, grabbing my phone out of my pocket. I dialled Chelsea’s number.

  “Bryce, hi. It’s so nice—”

  “Chelsea. I need you to take a chopper and fly to the co-ordinates I’m about to send you. I need you to pick up Alexis’ family then fly them directly to the Royal Women’s Hospital as soon as possible.”

  “Is everything okay? Are you—”

  “Chelsea, can you do that for me? Please?”

  “Of course, I—”

  “Thank you. I’ll send the co-ordinates now and the clearance to land when I have it.”

  I hung up from Chelsea and dialled Maryann.

  “Hello?”

  “Maryann, it’s Bryce.”

  “Hi, Bryce. Is everything okay?”

  “No. Alexis is in hospital. She fell down the stairs.”

  “Oh my goodness. Is she alright? Is the baby alright?”

  “She has a head injury and a broken leg. I’m not sure if anything else is broken or the extent of her head injury.”

  “Oh my God. Um...I—”

  “A friend of mine is on her way to pick you up in a chopper and bring you here. I’m not sure the kids should come at this stage though. I...I really don’t know if it’s a good—”

  “No, you’re right. We won’t mention anything to the kids. Bryce, is the baby alright?”

  I paused, not knowing if I could actually open my mouth and say the words. I had to though, so I sucked in a deep breath and said it out loud for the first time. “No, Maryann. The baby did not survive the fall.”

  I heard her gasp and subdue a sob. “Oh, I’m so sorry. Oh no, my poor darling girl.”

  “Chelsea is the pilot’s name. I’ve sent her details to land where I did at Easter. She should be there in approximately 40 minutes.”

  I hung up the phone and stood completely still, the past hour’s events only now just having sunk in. My adrenalin levels had also plummeted, and I felt the sudden urge to hurl my guts. I noticed an exit sign and a door which led outside, and without hesitation, I slammed my hands onto the glass panels and pushed it open. I took a few steps and vomited into the garden.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  I was almost certain when I began to rouse, that falling down the stairs had been a nightmare and I was simply waking up from it. I was almost certain that the constant beeping sounds and white noises that had been filtering in through my ears were all part of that unconscious realm. I was also almost certain that the unpleasant aroma that had been intermittently plaguing my sense of smell was again, part of my dreamlike state. The thing was, I wasn’t dreaming and my brain had only just now begun to decipher the reality that surrounded me, decoding what was real as opposed to a delusion. The fact from fiction became clearly apparent.

  My foot was throbbing in pain, and my head had the sudden urge to explode—that was fact. I could hear voices and noises close by and in the distance—fact, yet again. I could smell the unmistakable scent of sterilizing lotion—that was also a fact. And I had a dry scratchy-like irritation at the back of my throat, together with a horrible metallic taste in my mouth —once again, fact.

  I willed my brain to force my eyelids open but instead my hand flinched, grasping the hand that was placed underneath it.

  “Alexis. Alexis, it’s me, Hunny. I’m right here,” Bryce spoke, his voice penetrating my ears, filling me with a sense of calm. “Maryann, I think she’s trying to wake up again.”

  His hand tightened around mine.

  “Jen, get the nurse,” my mum said, her voice growing louder as she spoke.

  I felt a finger graze my cheek and it startled me, forcing my facial muscles to twitch.

  “Lexi, Sweetheart. It’s Mum.”

  My eyelids were stubbornly refusing to open, so this time rather than willing them, I demanded they open with everything I had in me. They obeyed and fluttered, filtering in flickers of light and spectrums of colour. I blinked a few times, gaining back strength and control of my eyelids.

  Almost instantly, I saw Bryce standing to my left, an expression of mixed emotion on his face. He looked happy and relieved, yet at the same time exhausted and concerned. My mum was to my right, brushing hair away from my face and smiling warmly at me.

  “Is she awake?” my sister Jen asked, as she burst into the room, which I now confirmed was a hospital room; the cream coloured walls and clinical equipment surrounding me a clear indication of that.

  A nurse in lilac coloured scrubs walked in after Jen, making her way over to me with a calm and reassuring look on her face. She started checking the monitors that were set up beside my bed. “Hello, Alexis. My name is Stella. I’m a nurse here at the Royal Women’s Hospital. You were brought in this morning after you fell down some stairs and hit your head.”

  I tried to talk, but only intermittent words and noises came out of mouth.

  “You might find it a bit difficult to talk at first. You were put under anaesthesia and intubated, so your throat may feel a little sore or irritated.”

  I nodded and tried to speak again. “Mm...my...foot..ff...feels—”

  “Yes,” she interrupted. “Your foot will feel quite sore. When you fell you fractured your fibula. You’ve had surgery to repair the break and your ankle is now set in a cast.”

  Nurse Stella checked my wound dressing. I looked down at my ankle which was slightly elevated and surrounded in a plaster cast—just looking at it heightened the pain.

  “I will go and get you some pain killers and water, okay? I won’t be long.” She patted my arm gently then gave Bryce a reassuring smile.

  He nodded at her then sat down on the chair next to my bed, still clasping my hand in his. Leaning over me, he kissed my forehead, his lips lingering on my skin for what seemed like a long time. “I love you,” he whispered, then I heard him sob and take in a breath. The agony in his inhalation was unmistakable.

  All surface pain that I had felt moments ago—my foot, my head, even the spot on my hand where the IV was injected—was nothing in comparison to the unbearable hurt I felt in my heart when I realised why he was sobbing and why I all of sudden felt empty.

  I shook my head. “No”.

  Bryce didn’t remove his lips from my forehead when he responded. “I’m so sorry, Hunny.”

  “No. No. No,” I cried. “Please, no.”

  Mum placed her hand on my leg. “Sweetheart, there was nothing they could do. When you fell, your placenta detached.”

  My heart was pounding and my chest felt incredibly tight, strangling me from within. I closed my eyes to stop the tears from over-flowing and to try and return to the moment before I fell, desperate to reverse the series of events that had led me here—bruised, battered, and completely heartbroken. “Oh God, I’m so sorry,” I sobbed.

  Bryce pulled away from my head and placed his hands on either side of my face. “You’re sorry? Alexis, what are you talking about? You have no reason to be sorry.”

  “I fell. It’s my fault. Our baby is gone because I fell.”

  “This is not your fault. It was an accident.” He leaned forward and kissed my head again.

 
Jen turned her back to me and looked out the window, her shoulders vibrating as she quietly reeled in her sadness.

  Mum dragged a seat to the side of my bed and placed my hand in hers. “Bryce is right, Alexis. It was an accident, you cannot blame yourself.”

  It didn’t matter what they said, though. I fell. I didn’t protect my baby. If I had been more careful my baby would still be alive and growing inside me. My baby is gone. A wave of excruciating heartache hit me again, and I cried like never before.

  Mum, Jen and Bryce tried desperately to reassure me that I wasn’t at fault, but after their attempts failed, they stopped trying and just let me cry. I cried on and off for hours, and I cried till there were no more tears left to cry.

  ***

  Day 2, after surgery.

  The next morning I felt somewhat better, my tears having run dry and my drowsy, sleepy state had lifted a little. I was also allowed to eat a light breakfast of semolina and yogurt. Bryce had taken one look at my first meal in over 24 hours and nearly left the hospital to get me something that did not look like ‘vomit’—his words, not mine. I had to insist he stay with me, which ended up being easy— he didn’t argue, not one bit. Weird. To be honest, I didn’t feel like eating all that much anyway, I still had a headache and was slightly nauseated.

  Apparently, my head injury had only been minor, resulting in instant concussion, subsequent soreness, nausea, and headaches. Apparently, I was lucky. Lucky? That one particular word from the mouth of a nurse who had just undergone a change of shift, threw me back into a state of devastation. I had cursed at her and told her that if the ‘definition of luck was falling down the stairs and killing your unborn child then I was the fucking luckiest bitch alive’.

  Bryce had asked her to leave the room, while following her out—furious. Needless to say, I did not see her again, but looking back at it now, it really wasn’t her fault. She had just used a poor choice of word, and at that time it had cut me like a knife.