Fulfillment

by Golland, K. M.

  He’d disappeared for a short time with Lucy and Charli to cook the fish ‘n’ chips. So I took that opportunity to approach Derek and see if he wouldn’t mind giving me some secret lessons.

  I motioned for him to come over to me then spoke in a hushed tone. “Um, Derek, can I ask you something?”

  He looked around the room in a sneaky type of way with a cute grin on his face. “Yeah, why are you whispering?”

  “This is gonna sound completely crazy, but I was hoping you’d do me a favour.”

  “Okay, sure. Fire away.”

  I giggled. Yes, giggled like an idiot at his choice of the word ‘fire’, remembering Carly’s burnt fiery hole that she wished he’d put out with his hose. I had to reign myself in again, much to my embarrassment and his amusement. “Aren’t you gonna ask what the favour is before you agree?”

  He chuckled. “No, how bad can it be?”

  I raised my eyebrow at him and he sat back just a little. “Nup, still can’t be that bad. So, what can I do for you?”

  I leaned over so that I could whisper in his ear, I didn’t want anyone else hearing my plan. “I want to learn to play the guitar as a surprise for Bryce and I was wondering if you’d teach me.”

  He shot back away from me. “Seriously?” He sounded somewhat amused.

  “Yes, seriously. There’s not much I can give a man that has everything, but this is something I can give him. I think he’d enjoy it.”

  He scoffed, but in a good way. “Yeah, I think he would too. Of course, I’d love to teach you. When do you want to start?”

  “As soon as possible, I’m kind of bored shitless at the moment and Bryce is due to go to Sydney tomorrow for work then on to Brisbane for the rest of the week. Lucy and Nic are gonna stay here, so I’ll fill them in and swear them to secrecy.”

  “Sure, I like a challenge and you look like a challenge,” he said, in a mildly flirty way.

  “Hey, I might just surprise you and be your best student.”

  “Well considering you’ll be my only student then, yeah, you just might.”

  “Give me your phone, I’ll program my number into it,” I put my hand out for his phone and he obliged, so I entered my number into his contacts. “As soon as you’ve got some spare time, give me a buzz.” I handed him back his phone.

  Bryce walked in moments later and placed the large platter on the coffee table. He walked over and handed me my own dish of sauce, saying loudly, “Alexis double dips.”

  “And proud of it,” I announced as I glared at him playfully and snatched it. I then proceeded to dip my finger in my dish and suck off the sauce.

  His eye twitched and I couldn’t help but smile wickedly at him.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket as Bryce went to fill a plate with seafood for me. I pulled it out to find a text from an unknown number:

  Don’t worry, I double dip too.

  But don’t tell anyone. - Derek

  I looked up at Derek standing next to the table. He gave me a wink then dipped his prawn back in the sauce.

  I burst into laughter.

  ***

  For the remainder of the evening the guys and Lucy practised some of their original songs and a few they planned to cover at the upcoming gig. I adored their rendition of “Hurricane” by Thirty Seconds to Mars and “Fader” by Temper Trap and I soon became really excited at the prospect of seeing them play again on stage, together with playing a guitar myself.

  I found myself staring in between Bryce and Derek, watching them intently as they strummed the guitars; they made it look so simple. Fuck! What have I got myself into? I’m so gonna suck and Derek is going to find it hilarious, if not aggravating—possibly even infuriating.

  “You might want to be careful where Derek is concerned,” Nic whispered into my ear, breaking me out of my regretful thoughts.

  I turned to her, confused. “What do you mean?”

  “He is a very flirty guy, just be mindful of that. You’ve kind of been staring at him.” Have I? Oh, shit! I have, but not like that.

  I screwed my face up at her, slightly offended at her not so subtle accusation. “Yes, I have been staring at him and at Bryce, for a reason. I am going to learn the guitar as a surprise for Bryce, and Derek has agreed to teach me. For your information, Nic, I’ve been watching them both play.” I turned my head back to Bryce, who had picked up on my change of demeanour, so I smiled at him.

  “Oh, I didn’t mean anything by it, Alexis. I just noticed you getting friendly with Derek and thought I better warn you that he can get quite friendly in return...sometimes too friendly.”

  “Do you speak from experience?” I asked her, snidely.

  “No,” she replied sharply.

  I turned back to her. “Then what are you talking about, Nic? I am in love with your brother-in-law. We have just lost our baby, and I want to make him happy again, give him something special to show him how much I love him. That is why I want to learn the guitar. I can’t exactly ask Bryce to teach me, can I? So in comes Derek. He is going to help me, that is it.”

  She lowered her voice even more. “Sorry, I honestly didn’t mean anything by it.”

  “Yeah, you did, Nic,” I answered without looking at her.

  The music stopped and everyone seemed to be pleased with their form.

  “I’m going to take Alexander upstairs to bed,” Nic announced to Lucy.

  “Okay, I’ll be up in a minute,” she gave Nic a look of concern. She obviously picked up on the not so pleasant discussion between me and her girlfriend. Or, maybe in addition to her humongous IQ and computer hacking skills; she could also lip-read—I honestly wouldn’t put it by her.

  “Nate and Charli, it’s getting late. You can say goodnight too, okay?”

  Both my kids did their new fist bump/high five/thumbs up/goodbye salute with everyone in the room. I shook my head and got to my feet, grabbing my crutches.

  Bryce made his way to my side. “Here, give me those.”

  “No, I can manage,” I said playfully, but trying to assert my authority at the same time.

  “Are you challenging me, Hunny?” he asked in a daring tone.

  I felt my face redden, so I quickly looked around the room.

  Lucy smiled and shook her head and Nate quickly sided with Bryce.

  “Mum, you are so gonna lose. Bryce always wins.”

  Bryce kept his eyes on me but extended his fist toward my son, my son quickly bumping it with his own.”

  “Really?” I asked, looking at Nate and now standing on one leg with my hands on my hips.

  “Yeah, really,” he replied, then snatched up my crutches and ran off.

  “Nate, you little traitor,” I yelled out after him just as Bryce bent down and swept me off my feet.

  As he carried me out of the room, I looked over my shoulder to Lucy. “And you think I’m in control over him. Ha, you’re crazy!”

  She just shrugged her shoulders.

  ***

  Bryce helped me put the kids to bed, or more like tilted me in their direction so that I could give them a kiss goodnight. Charli didn’t ask anything further about my fall, and I was kind of glad. Being able to explain the next morning seemed like a better option, I was still dreading it though and Bryce picked up on my unease.

  “Do you know what you want to tell them yet?” he asked as he carried me to our room.

  “No. I guess I’ll just tell them the truth. Um, where are we going? You still have guests downstairs,” I tried to peek over the half-wall banister, which spanned the top of the stair case to the end of the walkway.

  “They’ll let themselves out, they always do,” he said casually.

  “Bryce. You can’t just abandon them to put me to bed. And anyway, who said I was ready for bed? It’s still early.”

  “Yes I can. And trust me, you are ready for bed,” he exclaimed as he buried his head into my neck with an animalistic growl.

  I squealed in excitement. “Bryce!”

 
; CHAPTER TWENTY

  I dragged myself out of bed the morning after Bryce very deliciously put me to sleep by way of kissing nearly every surface of my body—nearly every surface. I’d found him and the kids in the kitchen, creating works of waffle-art for breakfast, including toppings like whipped cream, sprinkles, marshmallows and chocolate sauce. I liked his way of making what will be a horrible heart-wrenching moment somewhat better with sugar and aerated cream. My feelings told me it was not going to work, but I appreciated his effort nonetheless.

  All four of us were seated around the dining table when I decided to get it over and done with. Stewing on the inevitable was not something I enjoyed doing.

  “Nate, Charli. Bryce and I need to tell you something.”

  Bryce dropped his hand and placed it on my thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze.

  I sucked in a deep breath then slowly let it out as I opened my mouth to speak. “Charli, remember when you asked me if the baby was hurt when I fell?”

  “Yeah, Mum. I hope she is not angry at you, because it was an accident. You didn’t mean to hurt her,” Charlotte said with the sweetest sincerity.

  “No, Charli-Bear, I didn’t mean to hurt her. But...” I sighed and closed my eyes briefly. “She did get hurt, and unfortunately because of that, she stopped growing and the doctors had to take her out of my tummy.”

  Nate stopped eating and looked at me strangely. I could see him putting two and two together. Charli, on the other hand, put her fork down and smiled from ear to ear.

  “Where is she? Can I see her? Can I hold her?” Oh, shit! No, I didn’t mean it like that, fuck!

  I blinked a couple of times then brought myself back together, opening my mouth to speak. “No, Charlotte, Sweetheart. You can’t, because she didn’t survive.”

  Her smile faded and she scratched her head. “What do you mean?”

  “She means the baby died, Charli. When Mum fell, the baby got hurt, bad.” Nate got up from his seat and made his way over to me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. “Sorry, Mum. That must be really sad for you.”

  I clasped his arms with my hands holding him tight, but I could not respond.

  “Nate is right, Charlotte. The baby stopped growing, and her heart stopped beating,” Bryce explained, knowing my voice had temporarily ceased up.

  Charli’s bottom lip dropped and it began to tremble, breaking my heart for the umpteenth time. “Oh, Sweetheart, come here.” I freed my arms from Nate, holding them out for her. She slid off her seat and walked toward me, bursting into tears before she made it to my embrace. I wrapped myself around both my children and squeezed them tightly.

  “She’s in baby heaven now, playing with lots of other baby angels.”

  “Are there other baby angels?” Charli asked, weeping and pulling away while wiping her eyes.

  Bryce put his arms out for her so that she could sit up on his lap and be level with my face. “Yes, Charlotte, there are lots of baby angels. Some babies are not lucky enough to be born into this world, and some babies are born but then don’t live for very long. When that happens, they all go to baby heaven and become good friends,” Bryce explained as he reassuringly stroked his hand down Charli’s head.

  “Do you think she has made friends yet?”

  I smiled through my sadness. “Of course she has. I think she has lots of friends, Darling.”

  Charlotte nodded and returned my smile mildly.

  “So, Mum, I was right then. She was a girl.”

  I looked at Bryce then back at Charli. We had decided to open the envelope a few days ago to see if our baby was a boy or a girl, but I had chosen not to look at the picture—I was not ready for that yet.

  “Yes, Charli, you were right.” A tear fell from my eye.

  Nate left my side and returned instantly with a tissue.

  “Thank you, little man.” I kissed his head and tucked him back into my arms.

  “Mum, what was her name?” Charli asked quietly.

  Bryce took a deep breath. “Well, your Mum and I thought that you could choose her name, Charlotte.”

  She looked up at Bryce then gave him a hug. “Okay, I will pick the prettiest name ever.”

  He hugged her back. “I know you will, Charli.”

  ***

  We finished our breakfast together and answered more of Charlotte’s questions. Bryce was incredible and seemed to have the most amazing explanations for her, ones where she would understand almost right away. Seeing her expression change from nervous curiosity to understanding made me feel so much better, and the apprehensive weight of this encounter that I was carrying around lifted, just like Jessica said it would.

  “Are you alright?” Bryce asked as the kids made their way upstairs.

  “Yeah, I am. That was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, but it just proved to me how wonderful and special my children are. I’m so unbelievably proud of them both. And you...you just blow me away. Your ability to handle difficult situations is remarkable. I’m so blessed to have you.” I wrapped my arms around his waist just as Lucy and Nic walked into the kitchen with Alexander.

  I couldn’t look Nic in the eye, I was still slightly pissed with her accusing me of flirting with Bryce’s best friend. It was none of her business and she had jumped to the wrong conclusion. I mean, fuck! I was only talking to the guy and watching him play the guitar. I wasn’t salivating or flashing him my tits.

  “How’d it go?” Lucy knowingly asked Bryce.

  “Yeah, okay, those two children are pretty bloody awesome, just like their mum.” He gave me a loving wink. Lucy smiled.

  “There’s some left over waffles if you both want them,” he said as he pointed to the plate on the bench.

  Lucy took a seat at the breakfast bar. “Thanks, but your Eggs Benedict are my fav,” she batted her eyes at him in the hope he’d cook them for her.

  He raised his eyebrow and smirked at her. Interpreting that expression as an acceptance of her request, I unwrapped my arms from around his waist and took a seat at the breakfast bar. Bryce cemented my interpretation by turning to the fridge and taking out the carton of eggs.

  Sitting one seat away, I leaned in and baited her. “Tell me again, who has power over him?”

  She looked up through her lashes toward Bryce and answered quietly. “My methods are different from yours.”

  “Yes, I know,” I replied.

  “So, big bro, what time does your flight leave tomorrow?”

  I slumped over the bench, having been reminded by Lucy that Bryce was flying to Sydney the next day then on to Brisbane—I would not see him until Friday.

  “9 a.m. Why?” he asked, as he blended egg yolks, lemon juice and water together.

  “You’re gonna miss Alexis’ appointment with the surgeon to have the plaster removed.”

  He looked at me apologetically. “I know. I can cancel if you want me to come.”

  “No, don’t be silly, I’ll be fine. Anyway, you’ve neglected far too much of your work for me lately. You can’t keep doing that.”

  “No you can’t...” Lucy interrupted. “So, as I was saying, seeing as I’ll be the one taking her, I will need to borrow one of your cars.” She smiled naughtily at her brother.

  “No, you won’t. You have your own car,” he accurately pointed out.

  “It’s broken.”

  He raised an eyebrow at her as if to suggest her reason was pathetic and unbelievable, which clearly it was.

  “I’ll take the McLaren,” she said without looking at him.

  “No you won’t.”

  “Fine, I’ll take the Ferrari.”

  “No. You. Won’t.” He was very carefully pouring melted butter into the blender. “You can take the Jag.”

  “I don’t like the Jag,” she said, like an ungrateful child. “Lexus or Trans Am. That’s my final offer?”

  He smirked at her and she smirked back, both of them in the middle of a war of smirks. I sat there watching them, trying not
to laugh, Nic, too stifling a smile while rolling her eyes.

  “You can take the Lexus. It has more leg room than the Trans Am.” He switched off the blender.

  “Deal,” she said with a victorious grin.

  Bryce finished off the eggs benedict by sprinkling some chives on top. He leaned across the bench and went to hand it to Lucy, but quickly snatched it back and took a bite, teasing her.

  “Arsehole,” she said playfully.

  I burst into laughter.

  “I was about to give this back to you,” he said. “But now I’m just gonna lick it.” He held the slice of baguette up to his mouth, again teasing her. She went to grab it but he was too quick.

  “You are so aggravating at times,” she growled as she frustratingly pushed her stool back and launched herself around the island bench, now in pursuit of the half eaten baguette. I watched her chase him around the bench a couple of times when I noticed another slice on the plate with a perfectly cooked egg and silky Hollandaise sauce to match. I looked up at the brother/sister duo still running rings around me then leaned forward and picked up the abandoned baguette. Hmmm, don’t mind if I do.

  I bit down on it with a huge grin on my face. Yum!

  Nic laughed and smiled at my consumption. Her smile also held an apologetic undertone.

  She jiggled Alexander in her lap as she spoke to him. “Aunty Alexis is a clever cookie, isn’t she?”

  I swivelled around on my stool to face her, making sure I kept my leg out of the way of Bryce and Lucy. I thought I’d offer my own form of acceptance of her apology, offering her some of the Eggs Benedict. I held it up toward her. “Want some?”

  She nodded cheekily then stood up from the dining table and quickly walked to the bench to avoid getting run into by Lucy, who still hadn’t noticed the spare slice.

  Nic took a bite and let out a loud “Mmm.” Lucy refrained from chasing Bryce and both were stopped in their tracks.

  Nic and I froze.

  “Are you for real?” Lucy asked, exasperated.

  We both shook our heads. Bryce laughed harder then shoved the last piece he was holding in his mouth. I quickly did the same.