Secrets Behind Locked Doors

by Laura Martin

  Louisa closed her eyes and emptied her head and tried to follow her mother’s advice.

  Robert loved her. He loved her and wouldn’t do anything to hurt her. She knew that from the bottom of her heart.

  She remembered everything he’d done for her over the last few weeks, every stolen kiss and longing gaze. She remembered their lovemaking and she knew it was not just carnal desire that had lit his eyes as he looked at her. He loved her.

  The letter must have been written by someone who wanted to hurt her, or to hurt Robert. The only problem was there was some truth in it; the revelation of her background would damage Robert much more than it would damage her.

  She wondered for a second whether it would be better to leave, to set Robert free, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to do it. And besides, it wasn’t her decision to make. Robert would have to decide for himself whether he wanted to tie himself to someone who had been publicly denounced as a lunatic.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Robert checked his pocket watch and glanced up and down the street. He was early and he wondered how long he was going to have to wait. Not that he cared if he had to wait for hours if Louisa showed up at the end of it.

  He was back where it had all started, at the Lewisham Asylum. He glanced up at the barred windows and imagined the poor inmates locked inside. Many would never see the outside world again. They were locked up and forgotten by those who professed to love them. It still made him angry every time he thought of Louisa spending all those long months in the asylum, treated barely better than an animal.

  ‘Robert.’ Louisa’s voice made him jump. He’d been staring intently up at the asylum, remembering the first time he’d met Louisa and hadn’t noticed her approaching from behind. ‘I’m sorry to bring you back here. It just felt right to meet you where we first met.’

  Robert turned and swept her into his arms, so relieved to see her. When he’d received the note asking him to meet her here, he’d thought it too good to be true. He wondered if it were a cruel trick, or worse, if someone had forced her to write the note so they could demand a ransom for her.

  ‘I thought I’d lost you,’ Robert said, breathing in the scent of her hair, his hands running over her back, pressing her much closer than he strictly should.

  Louisa gently pushed him away.

  ‘I’m sorry for running away,’ she said. ‘I saw that awful announcement and I just couldn’t think straight.’

  ‘Louisa, I would never...’

  She reached up and pressed a finger against his lips. ‘I know,’ she said.

  Robert felt the relief flood through his body. He hadn’t realised quite how tense he had been. For hours he had been wondering exactly what she would say to him when they met. Every possible scenario had run through his mind. He hadn’t dared to hope Louisa would believe he had nothing to do with the announcement in gossip pages.

  ‘I love you.’ Robert didn’t know what else to say.

  ‘I know.’

  Robert felt his heart start to pound as the seconds ticked by without Louisa telling him she loved him back.

  ‘Robert, I need to say something and I need to say it without you interrupting me. Please.’

  He felt the panic rise inside him. She was going to tell him she was leaving. Or that she didn’t love him. Or that she believed everything that was written in that horrible letter.

  ‘I have a problem trusting people,’ she said.

  Robert waited, knowing there must be more to come. He’d known she had a problem trusting people from the very first time he’d set eyes on her.

  ‘I thought I would never trust another human being again in my life. And then I met you.’ She smiled at him softly and for a moment hope flared in his heart. ‘I tried not to trust you. I tried so hard not to fall in love with you, but somehow you broke through all my defences.’

  Robert held his breath, wondering what she would say next.

  ‘Then yesterday I saw that awful announcement in the paper and read the letter.’

  ‘Louisa, I...’ Robert started, but trailed off as he remembered he’d promised to let her say her piece without interruptions. The hand that held that morning’s society pages dropped back to his side.

  ‘Immediately I returned to my distrustful state and that wasn’t fair.’

  Robert frowned, not quite understanding.

  ‘You haven’t given me a single reason to distrust you in all the time I’ve known you. You’ve always been true and honest. My reaction was unfair to you and I wish to apologise.’

  His frown deepened; he hadn’t expected their conversation to go anything like this. He allowed the hope to flare again inside him.

  ‘I know it will take a long time for me to let go of my issues with trust, but with your help I know I can succeed. That’s if you’ll still have me.’

  So many questions raced through Robert’s mind, but he knew now wasn’t the time for them. He stepped forwards, slipped an arm round Louisa’s waist and pulled her towards him.

  ‘I promise I will spend my entire life helping you to trust me,’ he said.

  Louisa smiled tentatively as Robert lowered his head, brushing his lips against hers in a sensual and loving kiss.

  ‘I haven’t told anyone about your past, Louisa,’ Robert said as he pulled away from her momentarily.

  ‘I know. I know you wouldn’t do anything like that.’

  ‘And I don’t have a mistress or a lover.’

  Louisa smiled at him. ‘You don’t have a lover?’ she asked, some of the humour back in her eyes.

  Robert immediately thought of Louisa on top of him in the carriage and felt the first stirrings of arousal.

  ‘I have a fiancée,’ he said firmly.

  She cocked an eyebrow. ‘Is that a proposal?’

  Robert looked around him. In a way it was poetic, proposing where he had first met her, even if the asylum was the least romantic place on earth.

  ‘Louisa, will you make me the happiest man on earth and marry me?’ he asked sincerely.

  ‘You’ll be hounded from society,’ she replied.

  ‘I don’t care. As long as I’ve got you.’

  ‘I love you,’ she said.

  ‘You still haven’t given me your answer.’

  ‘Yes.’

  Epilogue

  Three months later

  Louisa had been told by everyone she’d met that a bride was meant to feel nervous on her wedding day. She smoothed down the silky fabric of her dress and smiled. She didn’t feel in the least bit nervous, she just felt happy.

  She’d got her happy ending. Robert was the kindest, most loving man she could wish for and she loved him with all her heart. Every time he looked at her, Louisa could see her love for him reflected in his eyes.

  He stood next to her, showing her off to all the ton, making sure everyone knew he was proud to be married to her.

  ‘What do you say we get out of here?’ Robert whispered in her ear.

  ‘We’ve only been here ten minutes,’ Louisa whispered back.

  Robert stifled a groan as the next well-wisher came to shake his hand and compliment Louisa on her dress.

  The wedding had been a grand affair with what seemed like half of London in attendance. Louisa would have been just as happy with just a few treasured guests—Mrs Knapwell, Major Dunton, Gertie, the little orphan, who was proudly showing off her new dress to anyone who would look—but Robert had insisted on a large wedding. He’d told her he wanted the ton to know he was honoured to have her as his bride.

  For their part everyone who had been invited had shown up, all craning to get a view of London’s most talked-about couple. In the past Louisa might have hated this notoriety, but nothing could dampen her happy mood today. Today she had
married the man she loved.

  ‘I’ve got a surprise for you,’ Robert whispered, dropping his hand from the small of her back to the curve of her buttocks and squeezing gently through the material of the dress.

  ‘Robert,’ she said scoldingly, ‘you know I’m a stickler for propriety.’

  He chuckled, paused to murmur a response to their next well-wisher, then leant in closer to Louisa, so she could smell his distinctive scent. His presence so close still made her feel giddy.

  ‘Not that kind of surprise,’ he reprimanded. ‘Although, if you prefer, we can go straight to the bedroom...’

  ‘Another sort of surprise?’ she asked. ‘Now you intrigue me.’

  ‘A surprise?’ Gertie asked as she came scampering back towards Robert and Louisa. ‘I love surprises. What is it?’

  Louisa grinned. Now Robert had both her and Gertie to contend with.

  ‘It’s a surprise for Louisa,’ Robert said, winking at Gertie as if she were a coconspirator.

  ‘For Mama?’ Gertie asked.

  Louisa felt her heart squeeze in her chest as Gertie said the words. They hadn’t completed all the formalities yet, but one day soon Gertie would be their daughter. Every time Gertie addressed her as ‘Mama’, Louisa felt the tears spring to her eyes.

  ‘So can we leave?’ he asked.

  Before Louisa could answer, Gertie nodded vigorously. ‘I want to see the surprise.’

  Louisa glanced at the room full of guests, most of whom they hadn’t greeted yet, and felt a bubble of rebellion rise inside her.

  ‘They have all come for the spectacle,’ she said quietly. ‘Why not give them something to talk about?’

  ‘I love you,’ Robert said, grinning at her.

  Without any further warning Robert spun, scooped Louisa up into his arms and turned to face their assembled guests.

  ‘Ladies and gentlemen,’ he said, his voice booming over the conversations of the guests, ‘thank you all for coming. I think it is high time I took my beautiful wife somewhere a little more private. Please stay, enjoy the party. Eat, drink and be merry.’

  Before the crowd could recover, Robert strode out the double doors with Louisa in his arms and Gertie beaming by his side.

  Louisa giggled. ‘They’ll be thinking you’re mad, too, now.’

  ‘Must be my wife’s influence rubbing off on me,’ he said with a grin.

  ‘So, what’s my surprise?’ Louisa asked.

  ‘A wedding present of sorts, but not a conventional one.’

  Louisa tried to guess what it could be with no success.

  ‘I’ve got you intrigued now, haven’t I?’

  He led her outside to his waiting carriage and helped her up. Once she was seated he lifted Gertie by the waist and set her gently inside the carriage.

  ‘Where are we going, Robert?’

  ‘Wait and see.’

  Louisa watched the familiar London streets pass by before her eyes.

  ‘Can I not have a little clue?’ she asked.

  Gertie clapped her hands in glee. ‘Two clues,’ she said. ‘One for Mama and one for me.’

  ‘I’ll give you a choice,’ Robert said, a mischievous glint in his eye. ‘You can either have a clue or I can spend the journey kissing your mama.’

  ‘That’s a clue in itself,’ Louisa said before Gertie could answer. ‘We can’t be going all that far.’

  Gertie pulled a face. ‘I want the clues,’ she said. ‘Kissing is icky.’

  Robert grinned. ‘You won’t be saying that when you’re older.’

  Gertie scrunched up her nose. Louisa felt as if her heart was about to burst. She loved her little family so much.

  ‘Stop delaying and give us a clue,’ Louisa said.

  ‘So my wife doesn’t want a kiss?’

  ‘Kissing is icky,’ Louisa said, her eyes meeting with Robert’s.

  ‘I’ll make you withdraw that statement later,’ Robert said quietly. Louisa felt the familiar heat rising up her body as she always did when Robert looked at her like that.

  Gertie sighed dramatically and rolled her eyes.

  ‘I think young Miss Gertie is indicating she would like that clue now,’ Louisa said, not able to tear her eyes from Robert’s.

  ‘Too late.’

  For a second Louisa was too caught up in the moment to realise what he’d just said.

  ‘We’re here.’

  Louisa peered out of the window, trying to figure out where he had taken them.

  The carriage slowed to a stop and Louisa recognised the building they had pulled up outside.

  ‘Robert, what are we doing here?’ Louisa asked.

  ‘Where are we?’ Gertie asked.

  ‘I know it’s a strange wedding present,’ Robert said, ‘but I thought you might appreciate it.’

  He opened the carriage door and helped her and then Gertie down.

  ‘I don’t understand.’

  ‘I bought it for you.’

  Louisa turned to him with a frown. ‘You bought it for me?’ she asked.

  He nodded.

  She looked up at the asylum and slowly understanding suffused through her body. ‘So no one else would have to suffer the way I did,’ she said.

  He nodded. ‘What you went through was inhumane.’

  Louisa flung herself into Robert’s arms and peppered kisses all over his face and neck.

  ‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘It’s the best present ever. We can make it so much better. We can ensure the patients get treated with respect and dignity.’

  Gertie put her hand in Louisa’s, sensing this was a big moment.

  Louisa looked up at her husband and knew she couldn’t have married a better man. Instead of buying her jewels or trinkets, he’d understood what really mattered to her. Thanks to him she would be able to turn the place where she had suffered the most into a calming and peaceful sanctuary for those who were afflicted with illnesses of the mind.

  ‘I’ve got a present for you, too,’ Louisa said.

  Robert looked at her with curiosity as she placed his hands on her abdomen. For half a minute he just stood there, looking puzzled, before realisation dawned in his eyes.

  ‘You’re...we’re...’ He couldn’t get the words out.

  ‘I’m pregnant,’ Louisa said, loving the happiness spreading across Robert’s face. ‘About three months.’

  ‘Pregnant?’ Gertie asked.

  Louisa nodded, hopeful the young girl would be happy.

  ‘I’m going to have a sister?’

  Louisa nodded again, waiting for Gertie to react.

  ‘Or a brother,’ Robert said.

  ‘I’d like a sister, please,’ Gertie said, ‘then we can play together and she can share my doll and we can be best friends.’

  Louisa felt the relief seep through her body. Gertie was already looking forward to being a big sister. And she could tell Robert was more than happy with her news; he had biggest grin she’d ever seen on his face.

  ‘You’re perfect,’ Robert said, stooping down to kiss her, ‘You’ve made me the happiest man alive twice over today alone.’

  Louisa looked up at her husband and smiled at him serenely. No matter what he said, she knew she was the lucky one. She was loved by the one man she adored and already she had a perfect little family.

  * * * * *

  Keep reading for an excerpt from THE KNIGHT’S BROKEN PROMISE by Nicole Locke.

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  Chapter One

  Scotland—April 1296

  ‘Faster, you courageous, knock-kneed, light-footed bag of bones!’ Gaira of Clan Colquhoun hugged lower on the stolen horse.

  How much time did she have before her betrothed or her brothers realised in which direction she had fled? Two days, maybe three? Barely enough time to get to the safety of her sister’s home.

  She couldn’t push the horse any faster. Already its flanks held a film of sweat and its breath came in heavy pants with each rapid pound of its hooves. Each breath she took matched the same frantic rhythm.

  There it was! Just up the last hill and she would be safe. Safe. And there would be food, rest and the vast warmth of her sister’s comfort and counsel.

  She turned her head. There was no sign of pursuit. Her heart released its fierce grip and she eased up on the reins.

  ‘We made it. Just a bit more and you can eat every last grain I can beg from Irvette.’

  She smelled the fire before she crested the hill. The stench was a mixture of blackened smoke, heat, dried grass and rotting cow. The horse sidestepped and flicked its head, but she kept its nose forward until she reached the top.

  Then she saw the horror in the valley below. Reeling, she fell upon the horse’s neck and slid down the saddle. Her left ankle twisted underneath her as it took the brunt of her descent. She didn’t feel the pain as she heaved her breakfast of oatcakes and water.

  When she was emptied, she felt dry dirt under her hands, crunching grass under her knees. Her horse was no longer by her side.

  She stood, took a deep breath and coughed. It wasn’t rotting cow she smelled, but burnt hair and charred human flesh.