Secrets (Lords of the City)

by Alice Ward

“Actually, could you run home for me?” Stacey asked. “Now that these stitches are out, I can take a real shower. I want my good shampoo, conditioner, and body wash… oh, and my razor.”

  “Your wish is my command,” he said, crossing the room. He bent low and planted a kiss on the top of Stacey’s head. “I love you, Stace. If you think of anything else you need, just text me.”

  “I will,” she agreed, smiling back at him.

  When Dr. Lekberg first arrived, he took me aside and emphasized how important it was that Oliver and Stacey had as much support as possible. He warned that many couples aren’t strong enough to survive the stress of having a sick child. But his fears had also been unfounded. If anything, the crisis had brought all of us closer.

  Oliver left the room and Stacey turned to me with a nervous grin. I started to think there was more to her sending Oliver away than just wanting her toiletries.

  “When’s the last time you talked to Drake?” she asked, her eyes dancing with a secret.

  “The day Emma was born,” I confessed. “I left him a few messages after he donated the hotel, but he never called me back. Why?” We hadn’t talked about Drake in days and his name caught me off guard.

  “I overheard the nurses last night while you were sleeping. They were talking about Dr. Lekberg. Rumor around the hospital is that Drake contacted him personally, flew him in on one of his private jets, and paid him a small fortune to take the case,” she said. Tears of gratitude filled my eyes and she passed me a Kleenex.

  “I know, I cried too,” she admitted. “And it’s not just that. When Oliver left yesterday, our contractor called from the penthouse and asked him to stop by and sign off on some stuff. Oliver got there and no one was there. But the place is completely finished, right down to a state-of-the-art nursery with all kinds of medical equipment we may end up needing when we bring Emma home. There were apnea monitors, sleeping pads, physical therapy toys for down the road. We only know one person who could afford to pull that together so quickly.”

  “Drake,” I said, my tears falling freely. “Oliver found this yesterday?”

  Stacey nodded. “He didn’t tell me until this morning. We hadn’t told Drake that we were going to sell the penthouse. He thought we were still planning on moving in before Emma got here. So when she came early…”

  A painful blend of realization and heartache hit me all at once.

  He looked so miserable the last time I saw him. He really did love me. And he believed me when I said I never loved him. Why wouldn’t he? Deep down, he never thought he was good enough for me in the first place. He donated the hotel, he saved Emma and did such a wonderful thing for Oliver and Stacey. He didn’t do these things to get me back. He won’t even answer my calls so I can thank him.

  “We were right about Drake, Chelsea,” she continued, her voice full of resolve. “But we were wrong about him too. Yes, he lied and hid things, and he has a scandalously horrible past. But he saved my little girl, Chels,” she said, her tone dropping. “Without being asked, he made sure that we had a home she will thrive in. The fact that he even thought to do that makes my heart melt. And the fact that he won’t take any recognition for it makes me think his heart is in the right place.”

  He really is the man I fell in love with. Maybe he wasn’t, in the past. But he is now.

  I stood up abruptly. “I’ve made a horrible mistake,” I announced as I searched the room for my purse. “Will you be okay on your own until Oliver gets back?”

  “I’ll be okay on my own all night,” she assured me with a mischievous smile. She had the triumphant look of a woman whose plan had fallen perfectly in place. “If it means you’re going to see him. But I’m not finished with my story, so slow down for a second.”

  “I don’t need to know anything else to know that I have to find him,” I insisted impatiently.

  “I know that, but finding him may be harder than you think,” she warned. “After Ollie told me what he found at the penthouse and Drake didn’t return my call, I called his assistant. She told me that Drake’s put an immediate halt on all projects and given his staff notice that he’s going on an extended leave of absence. He lined up new jobs for everyone in the office and packed up his things today. She wasn’t sure where he’s planning to go, or what he’s planning to do.”

  He’s leaving. He may already be gone. I still have the list of Waters properties from the background check. I’ll go to every last damn one of them if I have to. I have to tell him I was wrong. I have to tell him that I’m sorry.

  I pulled out my phone and dialed a familiar number. Drake’s doorman Frank answered on the first ring.

  “Ms. Tyler, thank goodness. Mr. Waters isn’t home. I take it you’ve heard he’s leaving town soon?”

  “Yes, Frank. It’s very important that I speak to him before he gets away. Will you call me on my cell if he shows up there?” I asked. I knew there was probably some sort of rule against Frank giving out a resident’s whereabouts, but I didn’t care. Fortunately, neither did he.

  “I’m on shift until midnight. If Mr. Waters comes home before then, I’ll let you know. I’m so glad you called, Ms. Tyler.”

  “I am too, Frank. I hope to see you soon.” I slid the phone back into my purse and turned to Stacey.

  “I’m going to look for him,” I explained. “There are a few places in the city Drake likes to go to think. I’ll start at the Flatiron and make my way to the park. Frank’s going to call if he goes back to the penthouse.” I looked longingly at the door, overcome with guilt.

  “Go, Chelsea,” Stacey insisted. “You’ve barely left our sides. I feel great; Emma’s doing better. I demand that you take the night off.”

  “You’ll call me if anything happens?” I hesitated.

  “Of course I will,” she assured me. “Now get out of here. And when you find Drake, please give him my thanks. What he’s done for us… I’ll never be able to repay him.”

  “I’ll tell him,” I promised, giving her a quick, careful squeeze. Then, I slung my purse over my shoulder and set off to find the man I love.

  I hailed a taxi outside the hospital and explained that I wanted to drive around the Flatiron and then possibly move on to Saint Patrick’s Cathedral. I figured retracing our first date was as good a place to start as any. If the driver found my instruction odd, he didn’t mention it.

  We arrived at the Flatiron and circled the block. I kept my eyes peeled for any sign of Drake, but he was nowhere to be found. The driver moved on to the cathedral and I paid him at the curb.

  The church is always open. Drake could be inside. If he isn’t, I’ll say a prayer and then walk to the park.

  I climbed the stone steps of the cathedral and pushed open the heavy door. I stepped through the entryway and into the sanctuary. The church was completely empty, so I moved to the rows of candles near the back of the room. As I struck a match, a familiar voice filled the air.

  “I said if you ever needed advice, fate would bring us back together.”

  I turned and saw Peter Meadows, my sidewalk sage, standing behind me. He wore stiff black slacks, a black button up shirt, and a starched white collar. I smiled at the sight of his warm, friendly face.

  “Good afternoon, Mr. Meadows,” I greeted him. “Or should I say Father?”

  “Mr. Meadows, Peter, Father Peter, whatever you prefer,” he said, wrapping both of his hands around one of mine. “I hope you don’t think me deceitful for not telling you I’m a priest. I’ve found that outside of these walls, people are much more open to God’s message if he isn’t given credit.”

  I raised a humored eyebrow as he squeezed my hand gently and then released it. “Isn’t that kind of counterproductive to your job? I thought that the main goal of clergy was to keep the pews full on Sunday.” The Catholic Church was so intertwined with the history of the written word, it was impossible to become an expert on one and not the other. And while there had certainly been plenty of honorable people in the church’s
past, the overall institution had always seemed too political to me.

  “You’re mistaken, my child,” the priest answered. “These pews are here for the people who are compelled to visit God’s house, as you were today. My job, my most important job, is to plant the seeds of hope and love and peace in all of God’s children, regardless of creed, status, or anything else. You’re lighting a candle. Would you like to speak your prayer openly?”

  I blushed and diverted my eyes to the thick carpet. Oliver and I hadn’t grown up with church and I felt completely out of place.

  “I lit the candle to say thank you,” I explained. “My niece Emma was born two weeks ago. She was four months early and things have been pretty touch and go with her. But she’s getting stronger every day and it looks like she’s really going to make it.”

  “What wonderful news,” Peter replied, a smile blossoming across his face. “What a blessing for your family. And how wonderful that you’ve come here, of all places, to celebrate.”

  “Actually, I was looking for someone,” I confessed.

  Father Peter didn’t seem disappointed by my correction. “Could this be the someone who’s inspired our previous talks?” he asked, his voice laden with genuine concern.

  I nodded. “I don’t suppose you read any of the society sections, do you?”

  He smiled gently. “I know who you are, and I know your recent troubles. Please, take a seat,” he added, waving to the padded bench behind us. “From what I read, you and Mr. Waters ended your engagement. Yet, you’re looking for him tonight. Does this mean that you doubt your decision?”

  “I don’t know,” I said, shifting my weight and folding my arms over my chest. “Drake lied to me. He deceived me in so many ways. And the things he was covering up… they were pretty repulsive. Do you believe that people can change, Father?”

  “That comes with the job,” he reminded me with a wink. “I have seen the Lord work miracles with even the most troubled of lives. Sometimes he works directly, inspiring souls to seek him out. Other times, he works behind the scenes, inspiring people to be better by placing them in just the right circumstances. He forces them to rise to the occasion, if you will.”

  Drake has definitely done that.

  “And once they’ve changed, they deserve forgiveness?” I pressed.

  “Forgiveness, yes,” he replied quickly. “If they’re truly penitent.”

  “How can you tell?”

  “Those who are truly sorry understand why their actions were wrong. They acknowledge and take responsibility for what they’ve done, and they strive to do better.”

  He’s done that too. He didn’t at first. But he has now.

  “I made a mistake,” I confessed. “I judged Drake for who he used to be, not who he is now.”

  “You said he lied to you,” he interrupted, his voice still warm and comforting. “Which means you had every reason to doubt him. I can tell that you really want to find him. But may I offer some advice?”

  “Please do.”

  “Before you see Drake, think long and hard about whether or not you’re truly capable of both forgiving and forgetting. You don’t deserve a life where you’re constantly expecting him to deceive you again. And he doesn’t deserve your doubt, if he’s truly worthy of trust now.”

  My phone vibrated against my leg. I retrieved it from my purse and read Frank’s message. Drake was home. I turned to Father Peter and squeezed his hand.

  “Father, after everything Drake’s done for me, what he did to me—the past—has already been forgotten.”

  ***

  “Ms. Tyler, I’m so glad you’re here,” Frank greeted me as I stepped into Drake’s lobby. He looked me up and down, trying to hide a frown.

  “I’ve been living at the hospital, Frank,” I explained, pulling at my oversized t-shirt. T-shirts, leggings, and tennis shoes had become my standard hospital attire. My hair was pulled into a messy bun and I couldn’t remember the last time I’d spent more than ninety seconds in the shower. But none of that mattered. I had to tell Drake how I felt before it was too late.

  “Of course, Ms. Tyler. Mr. Water hasn’t lifted his standing request that you be allowed upstairs immediately. Please, go on up.” Frank turned his key to the penthouse elevator and I stepped into the car. My pulse pounded in my throat and my palms went sweaty. I knew I could already be too late. I was willing to let go of the past and move on together, but would Drake feel the same? The elevator doors opened and I took a deep breath.

  “Come in, Chelsea,” Drake called out from the dark living room. I stepped out onto the marble and reached for the light switch.

  “Leave them off,” he barked. “What are you doing here?”

  My eyes adjusted to the darkness and I made out his figure on the couch. He was bent forward, his arms on his knees and a half empty glass of scotch in one hand. The decanter was on the coffee table in front of him.

  I cleared my throat and stopped a few feet away from him. “I came to thank you, and to say that I’m sorry.”

  “I don’t deserve your gratitude or your forgiveness,” he insisted dryly.

  “Yes, you do,” I argued. “I know what you did for Emma. I know that you’re paying Dr. Lekberg. And I know that you basically installed a NICU in Oliver and Stacey’s penthouse. You gave the hotel to the society. You’ve done so many wonderful things, and you’ve refused recognition for all of them.”

  Drake leaned back against the couch and sighed. “I know I don’t deserve to have you in my life, Chelsea. I didn’t do any of this to win you back. I donated the hotel because it was the right thing to do. I never should have let you hold the gala there, knowing that I planned to demolish it. I put your professional reputation in jeopardy.”

  “I did the same to you,” I pointed out softly. I slid a few feet backwards and perched on the edge of an armchair. “And I did it for the wrong reasons. I didn’t exactly lie when I said I was fighting to keep my professional reputation intact. But mostly… mostly, I was just trying to hurt you,” I confessed.

  “I know. And I had it coming,” he insisted. “I won’t lie. When you talked to the reporters, I was pissed. But as my anger wore off, I realized that I’d been doing the exact same thing to you. And I knew that if I donated the hotel to your society, it would let everyone in your field know that you’re a woman to be reckoned with. I thought that was the least I could do, after the way I hurt you.”

  “But what you did for the baby… may I?” I asked, nodding toward the scotch. Being in the same room as Drake had stirred up all sorts of emotions, and I hoped the alcohol would calm my nerves. And if Drake said yes, it meant he was okay with me sticking around for a while.

  “Help yourself,” he said with a casual wave. “Anyone in my position would have done the same to help Emma.” He paused, waiting until I filled a glass. “She deserves the best care possible. And I was in the position to give it to her. It was as simple as that.”

  “And the apartment?” I pressed after a burning sip. “That was really above and beyond, Drake.” I didn’t bother to tell him that Oliver and Stacey were planning to sell the penthouse. I had a sneaky suspicion their plans would change again.

  Drake shrugged. “It was nothing, really. I asked Dr. Lekberg for a list of the things Emma might need as she grows up. I had my assistant order everything and the interior designer arranged it in the nursery.”

  “That penthouse didn’t even have walls three weeks ago,” I reminded him. “You did a lot more than make a few phone calls.”

  “Oliver and Stacey had enough to worry about. And I’ve halted construction at all of my current projects. My crews had the penthouse finished in no time, and then moved on to other jobs.”

  “I heard you were taking some time off,” I said, twisting the glass in my hand.

  “I’m going overseas for a while,” he explained. “So much has happened these last few months. I need some time to figure things out and decide how to move on from here.” He paused
for a moment, and then looked up and met my eyes. His face was etched with pain and moonlight radiated from his skin.

  “Chelsea, I want you to know that I’m truly sorry for all of the ways I hurt you. I see now that my lies were much more damaging than the facts. You deserved to know the truth about the man you were pledging your life to, and I denied you that. I…”

  “I forgive you,” I interrupted, the words flying out of my mouth before I could stop them.

  “That means a lot to me. I want to thank you, Chelsea.”

  “Thank me? For what?” I asked, leaning forward.

  “You saw those forms. You know the kind of man I used to be. You’re the one who changed that. From the moment I laid eyes on you, I knew that you deserved the best of me. I wanted to give that to you so badly. I know I failed, but it’s a failure I’ve learned from. I’ll never go back to who I was before you.”

  I finished my scotch, sat the glass on the coffee table, and moved next to Drake on the couch. I took his hands in mine, stared into his eyes, and finally told him the real reason I’d come over.

  “I lied to you, Drake. When I said I never loved you, I was lying. I wanted to hurt you as much as you’d hurt me. The truth is I’ve always loved you. The way I felt about you the first night we met scared the shit out of me. I will always feel that I was justified for leaving after I found those forms. But I believe that you’ve changed, and that you’ve learned from your mistakes.”

  “Chelsea… if you’re about to say what I think you are, don’t,” Drake warned. “Not unless you’re completely sure. And not until I tell you what’s happened since we last spoke.”

  I crawled into Drake’s lap and wrapped my arms around his neck. I pressed my forehead to his and we sat silently for a moment, taking in each other’s breath. Drake wrapped his arms around my waist, his touch sending a familiar and welcome surge of electricity through my body. My heartbeat quickened and I felt like I could explode with happiness.

  “I don’t need to hear anything,” I insisted. “You’re the man I love, Drake. You’re the man I’ve always loved. And whatever happened, whatever you did on your path to me, I don’t care. All that matters is that we’re together.” I leaned in and kissed his soft, sweet lips. Drake kissed me back for a moment, and then pulled away from me.