By Way of Autumn

by Jacqueline Druga

  “Tess,” Ray placed his hand on my shoulder. “There was nothing anyone could have done.”

  I nodded and didn’t say anything. What could I say? I disagreed. There was something that could have been done. I could have offered help a little bit sooner. Maybe if I did, Del and Mary, a couple who were good to my family, wouldn’t be rotting in their living room.

  TWENTY – FROM THE LEFT

  I couldn’t wrap my head around it.

  Del and Mary were gone. All I kept going back to was the fact that Del looked pale, told me Mary was ill and I did nothing. I had enough supplies in my house to help them, yet, I didn’t want to part with those supplies until I knew I had enough for my family. Perhaps one unselfish act could have saved one of their lives. An act I failed to make. I would have to live with that the rest of my life.

  No one came for their bodies. Undoubtedly Ray asked for help, but there were few left in town to deliver that help. In a day or so there would be even less. Ray tried his hardest to give comforting words after I confessed to him about what I had done.

  “You can’t blame yourself. You were watching out for your family.”

  Still. I had the choice. Ray proved that by his actions. He chose to stay in town when he could have left. I made a vow right there, if I had the choice again to help, to save someone’s life by just being less selfish, I would.

  Ray was summoned back to his church. More people had came in from the highway. I took it as a good sign. We still had time to leave town. Although we waited on Larry and to hear the news he would deliver.

  Julie was simply devastated to learn about Del and Mary. My usually staunch and unaffected daughter was visibly shaken and slipped into another mode.

  “The heat isn’t good. When are we leaving?” she asked

  “You think it’s any better away from here?”

  “Yes,” She nodded. “If they are moving east into our town, they’re leaving from something.”

  “We don’t even know what it is,” I said. “We can guess. But until then we will only be running from the unknown.”

  “Better than staying here and dying from it.”

  “If we are going to survive, we need to know what we’re up against.”

  “I don’t care.” Julie folded her arms with defiance. “Statistically speaking, the longer we stay here, the more chance we have of dying of the heat. Look at you, Mom. You’re pale.”

  “It’s the kidney stone.”

  “How do you know it isn’t the heat wreaking havoc on you?”

  She was right. I didn’t know.

  “Why are you so adamant about staying and waiting?”

  “I told you,” I said. “We don’t know what we’re running from and we don’t know what we’re headed to.”

  “How about this?” Julie asked. “We do know what we’re running from. The heat, the flames. What caused them, I don’t care. We need to go.”

  She was right. It wasn’t just me. It was her, Tag, Liam, Josh and the baby. “We’ll go.”

  Julie exhaled loudly. “Thank you. When?”

  “Even though it’s cooler at night, it’s dangerous. We’ll leave in the morning, early.”

  “What about now?”

  “Julie, we have a working SUV. One of the few. I can’t take the chance that someone will find out. We may get attacked, overrun by people who are on foot.”

  “We can take people with us. It’s big enough to fit a few more.”

  “Where do we draw the line? Who do we help? No. We go. Us and Sam. I’ll talk to him.” At that second there was a knock on the screen porch door. “Speak of the devil.”

  Sam was there. He didn’t wait for me to answer, he stepped in. “I have news.”

  Excitedly, I made my way to him. “From Larry?”

  “Well, he said he couldn’t tell if the flames were moving. He said they didn’t move much. But the flames are sucking in the oxygen, pushing bad air this way and before long, they’ll need to feed and they’ll be here in about four days, not to mention other things.”

  I cocked back. “Larry learned all that from going up today.”

  “No.” Sam shook his head. “Larry looked at the fire. I learned all that from the radio.” He smiled. “I made contact.”

  TWENTY-ONE – NOVA SCOTIA

  The Mount Graham International Observatory in Arizona saw them coming about thirty minutes before they first arrived. Enough time to power down but not before sending out an emergency notification to anyone and everyone who needed to know. Government officials, FEMA, NASA. They even hit the prepper sites. A warning they believed fell upon deaf ears.

  That was exactly how Sam started the conversation, my mind immediately thought alien invasion.

  The observatory and a couple of observatories and centers were able to spare their electronics from the impending EMP, but they didn’t think any of the big government places were so lucky. It took a few days but communication had rekindle and radio chatter was making its rounds.

  Sam made contact. He was diligent about trying and I was grateful.

  We went into Jeff’s office so he could explain to me. I didn’t want to scare the kids. I would explain to them once I knew what was going on.

  Sam brought out a map of the world and drew a circle that encompassed the entire Pacific Ocean; the center of it seemed to be the Marshall Islands. North, the edge of the circle extended to the Bering Sea, east across to the west coast of the United States and west, it went as far inland as Beijing. South it hit Australia.

  “We were fortunate the Pacific took the brunt of it,” Sam said. “This is based on the coordinates I got. This was the part of earth facing them. Everything in that circle was instantly and immediately obliterated.”

  “Them? What obliterated parts of the earth.”

  “Two,” Sam said. “They call them the deadly twins. Gamma ray bursts. A long and short one. Happens when either two dead stars collide or a hypernova explodes. That’s like a giant star. The short ones cause less damage, the big ones, well …” he whistled. “Like getting hit with all the power of the sun in one spot.”

  “Oh my God, you were right.” I said.

  “Now’s not the time to brag. I wouldn’t have guessed this. What I’m showing you is where it hit. The man I spoke to said they are communicating with satellites that are sending images. They expect the fires to stop close to Phoenix.”

  “So we need to get passed Phoenix?” I asked.

  Sam shook his head. “There’s a lot more, kid, a lot more. See, not only did these burst kill our electronics for most of the world, they punched a hole right in our ozone layer. We got not only fire, but the radiation that is seeping through.”

  “Is that what those people from the highway have? Radiation sickness?”

  “I’m guessing so…”

  “Is there radiation here now?” I asked.

  “I checked. Nothing yet. But I assume it will be here in a few days.”

  “Then we need to get moving.”

  “We do,” Sam said. “And far. That hole will spread. Eventually it will stop, be a giant open spot for the sun to just burn us out. In time, long after you and I are gone, it will close up. Hopefully. Until then, within two weeks, most of the United States and Asia, will be uninhabitable for a long time.”

  The news took me aback some, but I felt relieved to finally know what was going on. “What’s the plan, then?” I asked. “What now?”

  “They are telling people to go east. Go as far east and possibly north east as they can go.”

  “We’ll never make it that far on what gas we have.”

  “I have to tune in tonight again,” Sam said. “Apparently, the warning was heard. There are convoys and trucks and trains taking people east. We go as far as we can and get as close as we can to one of those places picking up people and we’re good. Who knows? We may be able to get gas somewhere. But there are problems out there.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “We
got to make sure we’re not sick or we can’t get on the transports. I know that much.”

  Hearing that made me chuckle in ridicule. “Really? They are scared of radiation sickness spreading or they just don’t want to deal with the ill? Radiation sickness is not contagious.”

  “But other things are.”

  My attention caught. I crossed my arms and listened.

  “Aside from some sort of virus from the dead birds. Dying people and animals are causing something else. Cholera. They have it. The birds have it. Animals. Without proper medical care, hygiene, it’s an epidemic that we are ill equipped to handle.”

  I closed my eyes at the news.

  “So we just need to get packed and go. Even though we have a few days. We shouldn’t wait. First thing tomorrow. We’re all well, none of us are sick, now’s the time,” he said.

  I nodded my agreement. He had told me all I needed to hear. Of course there was more. If we successfully stayed well, made it through the borders, caught the transport and arrived to a safe zone, it wasn’t over. The struggle to keep surviving would begin once we arrived east.

  Throughout history extinction level events had occurred. I just never believed I’d be alive to see the day when the next one arrived.

  It did and my family and I were not only witnesses to the end, we were also victims.

  TWENTY-TWO – THE HAND

  Doctor Stanley stopped by our street after hearing Sam had made contact. He needed more information about what he was medically dealing with. Supplies to help those who were ill were limited. There were many from the highway with radiation, less than a dozen with cholera and nearly twice that had some unknown illness.

  We sat on my front porch, ignoring the smell. Yet, each whiff from the dead birds worried me. They weren’t just bodies, they were carriers of something.

  “I checked the medical books,” Dr. Stanley said. “H5N1 isn’t the only thing we can catch from dead birds. There’s a laundry list. I can’t treat what I don’t know.”

  Sam understood, but there was nothing he could do until the people in Phoenix were back on the air at five p.m. He’d try.

  Dr. Stanley was at his wits end.

  “We have ten of our own townspeople down with it. How many more left this morning and are now getting sick? It has to be contagious.”

  “How long does it take to show symptoms?” I asked.

  “Day or two from what I’m seeing.”

  There was something exceedingly frightening about hearing the word contagious. It meant, even if we were in the clear with radiation, we weren’t with whatever else was going on.

  “Is this why they’re stopping people?” I asked. “I mean, cholera can be beaten.”

  “It can when caught early enough; this is definitely something respiratory. In the air or water. It’s hard to tell. That is the thing I think the border patrols are worried about.” He seemed so defeated. “Who knows. Just that, I’m sure those who came here sick weren’t sick when they left their towns. Well, those without radiation poisoning. That is not a pretty sight.”

  Admittedly, I didn’t understand what he meant by ‘pretty sight’, nor did I ask him to elaborate.

  He waited a little while longer with me until Sam came from his house and said he was unable to make contact.

  “It was worth a shot,” Dr. Stanley said. “Find me when you do hear back at five.”

  “Will do, Doc,” Sam said.

  At that moment, we all lifted our heads to the green tinted sky when we heard Larry’s plane.

  Sam whistled. “Going east. Larry didn’t waste much time now.”

  “Guess progress reports from Larry are done,” I said.

  Sam shrugged. “Do you blame him? Once he knew we could get information he felt free and clear to leave. He’ll fly as far as he can.”

  “And hence … another leaves.” Dr. Stanley stepped from the porch. “Pretty soon we’ll all be walking across the desert to get out of here. Hopefully before the radiation catches us like the ones out west.”

  Both Sam and I remained silent as we watched him walk away. We both knew our journey east wouldn’t be on foot, even in front of someone as kind as Dr. Stanley, we kept our ace close to our chest.

  Not even he would know we had transportation. Although, he was a single man, a widower, so I was contemplating on asking him to join us. His knowledge and expertise would be vital.

  “Sam?” I asked. “Why do you suppose the radiation hasn’t reached here, yet?”

  “I’m not an expert. Hell, I would have guessed it would be here by now. But air-flow, winds, the fire sucking in the oxygen, I guess they have a lot to do with it. It’s creeping here though, that’s for sure. Well …” He glanced down to his watch. “I better start getting things ready.”

  “Yeah, me, too.” I bid my farewell for the moment to Sam, knowing I had so much to get ready. Julie was working on it. We had a lot of stuff. I wanted to not only get it into my SUV, but hide it somehow so we weren’t a moving target.

  My paranoia level increased by the hour. I knew how far I had gone, worrying obsessively, when I reached my door handle and heard a cough.

  Turning my head to the sound I knew it came from next door; Bill’s house. A manly cough, it was Bill. He coughed again.

  Normally I wouldn’t think anything of it, but after hearing the news about the new and contagious respiratory virus, that cough might as well have been an explosion.

  It sounded frightening and had the potential to be deadly.

  In my mind, a cough … a bomb … there was no difference.

  <><><><>

  The temperature stayed around eighty and was much more manageable inside. The increasing cloud coverage did have its benefits.

  Julie rambled excitedly and fast about all that she had packed. How she found a map and a bag of weed in Jeff’s special room. I felt exhausted, in pain, and not myself.

  “Where’s Josh?” I asked.

  “He’s helping Reverend Ray.”

  She must have noticed my concern because she held up her hands to stop me from speaking.

  “Not with the sick. Going around looking for supplies and seeing if anyone needs anything.”

  “Well, adult or not, he needs to let me know. Since his parents left, I’m gonna take it they are trusting us to treat him like family…”

  As soon as I said those words I froze and looked in the living room.

  Liam sat on the couch holding a toy.

  How easily I spewed forth those words about family in reference to a grown man, yet, I failed to see my responsibility to Liam, a child.

  He had lost his family, he had no one. Yet, I treated him like a boarder or lost luggage, waiting for someone to claim. No one was going to claim Liam. Unconsciously, I ignored him, didn’t even attempt to get close to him. Had I even spoke to him or paid attention to him in the last couple days?

  Not only as a human being, but as a mother, I was failing. What was wrong with me? Had I been so consumed, I didn’t even acknowledge the needs of a child.

  Children needed three things, food, shelter and love.

  Guilt consumed me; giving attention to him cost me nothing. It was something he wasn’t getting. We were all he had. Instantly I felt horrible. I was a better person than I portrayed, at least I thought I was. The events of late had taught me I had a lot to learn as a human being.

  I walked away in the middle of a conversation with Julie, went straight to the living room, sat on the couch and lifted Liam to my lap.

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “Can I hug you?”

  He nodded and lifted the toy. “Like the truck?”

  “Yes.” I lifted him to my lap and secured my arms around him, trying my hardest to convey warmth and care. I noticed his cast. Obviously Tag had drawn all over it.

  The child was injured, lost and alone and I did nothing.

  That would change.

  How long did I sit there holding him? Giving him my complete attention, ev
en when Tag asked me for a story. I declined, telling Tag, ‘Later’ and dedicated my all to Liam at that moment. He needed and deserved it.

  It was in the middle of hearing Liam’s story, half of which contained words I couldn’t make out, that Josh came in.

  The look on his face told me he had something to say and was scared.

  “What is it?”

  He took a breath, moistened his lips, “There’s people out on the highway, too sick to go any farther.”

  “Okay.” I returned my attention to Liam.

  “From what I hear it’s radiation sickness. Nothing contagious.”

  “Okay.” I said again.

  “Can I take Julie and use your truck to go get them?”

  I lifted my head. “No.”

  “There are five people …”

  “No.”

  “Is that a no to taking Julie or …”

  “To it all.”

  “They aren’t contagious.”

  “I don’t care. You can’t take her, you can’t take my truck. I need the gas and I don’t want people to know about the truck. How do you know they aren’t contagious?”

  “The man that came in told us. They just need help.”

  I returned my attention to Liam.

  “Tess, they’ll die if we don’t help them.”

  “They aren’t our problem, Josh. They’ll die anyhow …” As soon as I said those words, I cringed.

  Did they just come from my mouth?

  Me, the person who felt guilty about Liam. The same woman who not an hour earlier made a vow not to be selfish.

  Yet, there I was, doing it again.

  Slowly, I lifted Liam from my lap and stood. “You’re not taking my daughter in case there’s a problem.”

  Josh exhaled. “I can use the truck?”

  “Yeah, I’ll go with you.”

  “Tess, you don’t look well. Maybe …”

  “I’m fine. I’ll go with you.”

  “Cool,” he said. “I’ll go put back the fuse.” He walked toward the kitchen and the back door.

  Julie stepped in the room. “Are you really going?”