Elemental Hunger

by Elana Johnson

  Davison stepped toward the vehicle, toward Hanai, his mouth saying words I couldn’t hear. A white frame edged into my vision.

  My stomach clenched, and I bent over. “I killed him. Hot blazes, I killed him,” I said over and over, thinking only of Hanai and how he wasn’t breathing. I retched, and then the square of whiteness covered everything.

  Paperwork needed to be filed and finalized, meetings attended, motions approved, messages sent to the far cities. Davison had the support of every Councilman in the United Territories, and he was appointed the new Supreme Elemental. As busy as the twentieth floor in Gregorio had been, that activity was nothing compared to what Davison organized in Tarpulin.

  The Earthmovers, including Isaiah, were commissioned to clear the Elemental school. Airmasters took over communications, sending messages through the air.

  While things were being reorganized and reassigned, I took the liberty of drafting a new clause that would eliminate the marriage requirement for female Elementals.

  I delivered the single sheet of paper to Davison, who took it with a heavy sigh and a small smile. He didn’t say he’d make it happen, but that didn’t matter. I would make it happen.

  I retreated to a bedroom near a garden Hanai would’ve loved. Cat stayed close to me, and I was secretly glad, unsure if I could bear to be alone with myself. When Isaiah returned from his work excavating the school, he shared a room with Adam down the hall. I spent most of my days in their room, waiting for Adam to wake up.

  Desperately praying and hoping that he would wake up.

  Cat had taken on the public face of our Council—she attended all the meetings, she spoke to the right people, she filed the paperwork so we could attend diplomacy training.

  I kept watch in a hard, straight chair next to Adam’s bed. Sometimes I talked, telling him about my work in the kitchens in Crylon. I told him about my friendship with Patches and then all about running through the forest with Jarvis. About Educator Graham. And how I wanted to see the sun reflect off the wide waters again.

  I cried a lot. Mostly when I realized that Adam hadn’t moved for hours. Or when I thought about Hanai, the gentleness in his hands, the slow curve of his smile. After I let myself drift to those thoughts, I couldn’t breathe.

  Isaiah brought food I didn’t touch. Cat brought paperwork I didn’t sign. Both of them watched me carefully, like I was a doll that might break at any moment. They were probably right.

  Two days later, the paperwork merely needed my signature, sloppy and childlike as it was. I’d been enrolled in reading lessons, something I should’ve been eager to attend. But Hanai should’ve been sitting next to me in class, and he wouldn’t be. He’d never learn to read, and I found I didn’t want to either.

  Isaiah settled on the edge of the bed, humming a tune I’d heard many times in my past life in Crylon. He lightly touched Adam’s hand. “Has he moved at all?”

  I shook my head. “No.”

  “Gabbers, this isn’t healthy. You need to get out of this room. Come to the school and help.”

  I swung my head harder. “No.”

  Isaiah sighed and dropped both hands to my knees. “Gabby,” he said. I noted he hadn’t called me Gabbers. “He may not wake up.”

  I’d thought of that, too many times. “He will.”

  The patterning lines of the tattoo still washed over Adam’s face and neck, disappearing under his clothes. I traced the darkest one from his chin, over his jaw and cheek and up into his hair.

  Alex’s words from the plains played over and over in my mind. Adam is a silly boy. He doesn’t love you. He’ll abandon you. I shoved the words away.

  “He will wake up,” I repeated, more to assure myself than Isaiah.

  “Cat insisted that you sign these documents.” Isaiah held out a folder stuffed with papers. “She told me not to leave until you agreed to do it.”

  “Leave them on the table. I’ll do it before I go to bed.”

  “Cat’s already signed. So have I. We just need your signature…and Adam’s. And Davison wants to know who our Unmanifested is going to be.” The pain in Isaiah’s voice mirrored the hot stab running through my chest.

  I couldn’t answer. Just like I couldn’t erase the image of Hanai, burning and not breathing, from my head.

  “He suggested Liz,” Isaiah murmured.

  “Liz?”

  “She lost her Firemaker and her Watermaiden to Alex,” Isaiah whispered. “Davison is appointing the Earthmover and Airmaster to Elemental diplomacy divisions in Cornish and other Unmanifested villages. It’s part of his new integration program.” He cleared his throat. “Liz will be sent back to Crylon if we don’t take her on.”

  Back to the laundry facility, I heard in my head. A death sentence.

  “Great, let’s take her on.”

  Isaiah grunted his approval and paused in the doorway. “You’ve got to leave this room. Your reading teacher says she’s ready any time you are.”

  “In a minute,” I said, curling into a ball in the chair, my gaze never leaving Adam’s face.

  When I woke up, the late afternoon sunlight sent deep shadows scurrying across the floor. As I rubbed my stiff neck, I noticed something different about the room.

  The bed lay empty.

  My heart pounded in my throat. Before I could stand, someone stepped into the doorway, the sun not quite reaching his face. “You finally woke up,” he said.

  A sob caught in my throat, blocking the air. I jumped up and flung myself into Adam’s waiting arms.

  The thrill at Adam’s awakening only lasted a few hours. His survival only served to remind me of Hanai’s death. So I existed in the same space with my Council, but we didn’t talk. We wordlessly prepared for our move into the newly excavated diplomacy wing of the school, barely looking at one another. I felt lost, adrift, inside my own head.

  “I’ll meet you there,” Councilman Davison said, the words jolting me like an icy flame. I’d already nodded my agreement.

  “Wait.” I looked around the guest bedroom blankly. “Where am I going?”

  “The town square,” Davison answered, his voice fringed with frustration. “Your Council is waiting downstairs. We’ll be a few minutes behind you.”

  “Who’s coming?”

  “Only the whole city of Tarpulin.”

  A fog lifted from my brain. “And I’ll be….”

  “Announcing the new gender equality clauses,” he finished for me. “I’ve approved your motion to remove the marriage aspect of chartering Councils too. You agreed to announce it to the public.”

  Every cell in my body flared to life. “I—I can’t. All those people.” I hadn’t felt this much panic since I fled from Adam and shredded my foot on the icy plains outside Cornish. Everything burned.

  I tried to speak, but couldn’t. Davison’s voice boomed in my ears, dropping me to my knees. Shards of pain shot through my legs and up into my heart. Feeling so much—confusion, helplessness, desperation, betrayal—opened a dam inside that couldn’t be contained.

  The calming scent of smoke helped. Of course Davison would know to light a fire in the hopes of comforting me.

  Only when I heard the frantic shouting did I think there was something wrong. My skin itched. Something scorched my throat. The Elemental fire inside responded to the flames raging around me.

  “Tornadoes! Gabby, knock it off!” Adam’s voice cut through the infernal pain. Through the hurt and anguish. His hands gripped my shoulders and pulled me through a barrier of heat and into someplace cool.

  Frigid air rushed over my skin, calming the flames and driving the smoke away. I craved it. So I pushed Adam back and tried to find the ashy flavor again. He swore, this time picking me up.

  Everything stayed dark. The smoke left, the voices fled, the fire retreated.

  Only Adam remained.

  “Stupid girl,” he said, his voice choked. “Trying to kill yourself?”

  No, I said inside my head because my voice wouldn
’t work.

  “Good to hear,” he said. “Why are you so upset?”

  I don’t want to talk to thousands of people. What if they don’t believe me? I wanted to open my eyes, but a veil of heavy darkness pressed against my lids. I don’t even know who or what to believe.

  Adam’s lips came softly against my cheek. “Believe me, Gabby. Please, you’ve got to believe me.”

  “But Alex said—” My voice raked through my parched throat.

  “I know what she said. The Adam Gillman Alex knows—knew—was a selfish jerk who took advantage of anyone, anywhere, anytime to get what he wanted. I’ve already told you all this. You’ve got to make your own decision about me, Gabriella. Who’s the Adam Gillman you know?”

  I opened my eyes to find nothing but love shining in Adam’s eyes.

  “Gabriella.” It came out as a plea as he set me on my feet. Adam cupped my face in his marked hands. “Will there always be this gulf between us?”

  I traced the haunting lines of his tattoo with my eyes. The lines on his face reminded me of what he was, of who Alex had made him.

  “I don’t know,” I whispered, thinking that there was more than just the sentry tattoo between us. There was Hanai, too.

  I stood to leave, the sadness in his eyes eating away at my already raw emotions.

  As I walked away, I heard, “I love you.”

  Blazes, I thought I could’ve loved him too, but I also thought any love I was capable of feeling had died with Hanai.

  “I don’t want him there,” I stated. The conference table in front of me was metal and cold, and I folded my arms to contain a tremor.

  “Councilman Kilpatrick, he is an invited guest.” Davison sounded like he had run out of patience fifteen minutes ago. Or maybe yesterday after my panic attack. He’d announced the changes in the law I’d insisted on. In fact, he’d met every one of my demands, right down to the color of robes we wore. I’d requested green, though I would’ve taken anything but the navy blue we’d been assigned in Gregorio. I fingered the emerald silk along my arms.

  “Well, uninvite him.” I glared at Adam, who continued to stare out the window.

  Davison exhaled through pursed lips. “He’s severely injured, and he’ll be chained. He won’t bother you.”

  “Just having him here bothers me. Knowing he’s in the building….” I shuddered.

  “I need to see him,” Adam said quietly as he turned toward me. “I have to look my brother in the face and have him see me as an Airmaster. A chartered Councilmember. Not a sentry.” His eyes burned with an intensity I’d never seen.

  We stared at each other, the tattoo still wedged between us.

  “Fine,” I said.

  “Fine.” Adam turned back to the window, his hands clasped formally behind his back.

  I hated this chasm between us, but I didn’t know how to bridge it. My nerves seemed even more exposed than usual. I felt dangerous, desperate, unsure. My fire surged and quelled as I attempted to make sense of the mess in my life.

  “Councilman.” Davison had to say it twice more before I realized he was talking to me. He stood in the doorway, clearly waiting for me to accompany him to the ceremony.

  “Sorry,” I murmured as I followed him into the hall. We headed outside and up the steps to a platform in the center of the town square. The evening sun had dipped below the horizon, bathing the city in pink light. Lanterns had been set up in the streets, illuminating the horde of people clustered in the square beneath the flickering firelight. I remained close to Adam, wanting to reach out and grip his hand. He’d squeeze back, helping to calm my raging insecurities.

  Oh, how I wanted to. Instead, I existed with my own nerves.

  Special seating for invited guests stretched in front of the platform. Felix’s heavily bandaged face stood out, and the air left my lungs. Two sentries stood behind Felix, and the petering sunlight glinted on the silver chains binding him to the chair.

  Before I could reach for him, Adam laced his fingers through mine. My nervous energy only increased.

  “People of Tarpulin, people of the United Territories.” Councilman Davison stood before the throng of people, his arms raised, welcoming them. I’d never seen anything like this in Crylon, but Davison said in Tarpulin, all new Councils were presented to the people.

  “We present the re-opening of the Elemental Academy, and the first Council that will reside therein.” He gestured to me. “This is Gabriella Kilpatrick, a new female Firemaker and Councilman, as well as the girl responsible for the displacement of Alexandra Pederson.”

  The babble in the crowd only increased as they all whispered to each other. I had no idea what they might be saying. And I found I didn’t care.

  I was who I was. Gabby Kilpatrick, girl, Firemaker, Councilman. I didn’t know how to be anyone—or anything—else.

  “You don’t have to be,” Adam whispered, nudging me forward.

  Davison motioned for me to join him, a mask of confidence thinly veiling his frustration. I stumbled forward with Felix’s laser gaze burning into me. Then I straightened my shoulders and looked him straight in the eye.

  I suddenly understood Adam’s desire to have his brother see him for who and what he really was. I wanted the same thing. I wanted Felix to see me as more than the girl who begged. I wanted him to see me as a Firemaker—and a blazing good one at that.

  I didn’t know what emotion swam in his eyes. By the time Davison declared, “Councilman Kilpatrick is an excellent Firemaker,” it didn’t matter what Felix thought.

  “I am a Firemaker,” I whispered only to myself. Well, Adam probably heard. After Davison’s words, I lifted my hand in what I hoped was a wave of gratitude.

  “May I introduce her Airmaster, Tarpulin’s own Adam Gillman.” Davison stepped back, and Adam strode forward. His magnificent emerald robe billowed around his legs. He wore black pants underneath—a hint of his past life.

  Like me, he raised one hand in a general wave, but a dash of wind crept through the crowd. Faces brightened. They turned toward each other, smiles in place.

  Everyone except Felix. Even through the bandages and the blistered skin, he glared with a loathing so strong it pierced my heart.

  Adam arranged his face in the same chiseled disdain as his brother. I placed one hand on his forearm, and the emotion dissolved into relaxed lines around his eyes and mouth.

  Every eye caught our exchange, and now heads were bent together, surely discussing our assumed betrothal, old law or not. We should probably talk about it at some point, I thought, looking at Adam. He glanced at me, a glint of something bright in his expression.

  “Isaiah Hawking, an exceptional Earthmover, has accepted his position on Kilpatrick’s Council.” Davison gestured to Isaiah.

  Thunderous applause erupted, filling the square, the sky, the entire world, with appreciation.

  Isaiah bowed low in his vibrant robes. “My people,” he bellowed in his huge voice. The crowd quieted as he began to sing. After a few bars in Isaiah’s baritone, Cat linked her arm through his and joined her voice to his. As she sang, rivulets of water fountained from the cracks in the sidewalk.

  Something that felt like a smile pulled at my mouth.

  Adam caressed my fingers with his before holding them tight. “Whatever I have to do to erase this distance between us, I’ll do it.”

  I looked up into the soft, loving glow in his eyes. A tiny flame sparked inside me. Could I love him back? Enough?

  “I’ll be whatever you want,” he added. “Whoever you want.”

  I sighed. “I just want you to be the Adam I hope you are.”

  “I’ll never stop trying.”

  I blinked, and for the first time, saw the real Adam. The one he wanted Felix to see: The Airmaster.

  Not the sentry. Finally, the tattoo meant nothing. I reached up and traced one line of it, from the corner of his eye to his chin. I tried a smile, and it felt okay on my face.

  Cat and Isaiah’s song drifte
d into silence. A moment passed before applause erupted through the square.

  Councilman Davison held up both hands. When the people had hushed, he continued with the introductions. “You just met Catherine Browning. She has demonstrated her vast expertise with water.”

  I glanced at Cat, and she pulled me into an easy hug, like she used to in the dorms in Crylon. A bit of my former self awakened with her familiar friendship.

  “Councilman Kilpatrick has chosen another friend from Crylon to be her Unmanifested,” Davison continued. “I present Elizabeth Nox for the completion of this Council.”

  Liz stepped to my side, her nervousness obvious in her stiff posture. I put one hand on her arm, trying to infuse her with a sense of confidence I didn’t quite feel myself.

  I closed my eyes in a long blink, and the image of Chief Tavar formed in my mind. His face radiated the parental pride I’d expect to see when he looked at Hanai. The Chief bowed his head, forgiveness blinking in his golden eyes before they closed momentarily. “Firemaker.”

  “I’m sorry,” I murmured, the words skimming across my tongue.

  “Serve well,” he responded before fading into the darkness of my mind.

  I opened my eyes and looked at the people below.

  “People of the United Territories, your newest Council.” Davison swept his arm toward us.

  Pushing my ache for Hanai deep inside, I stepped forward to take my place as the Councilman. I spread both arms and shot brilliant sparks of colored fire into the night sky.

  The crowd gasped and cheered. They accepted me.

  I finally belonged.

  Elana Johnson is the author of the Possession series, which includes full-length novels POSSESSION, SURRENDER, and ABANDON, and short stories REGRET (ebook only) and RESIST (free). She is also the author of ELEVATED, a young adult contemporary romance novel-in-verse.

  Her novella, ELEMENTAL RUSH, began a new futuristic fantasy series. ELEMENTAL HUNGER, a full-length novel, is the second part of the story. The series concludes with ELEMENTAL RELEASE, the final novella.