Chaperoned

by Dora Heldt

  Kalli leaned over to peer into the cup. “Sort of, yes.”

  “What do you mean, sort of?”

  “I’m not an idiot, of course I did. This isn’t the first time I’ve made coffee. Christine, you have a look.”

  “Perhaps the filter bag came out of place.”

  Kalli stirred the contents of the jug again, making the powder swirl around.

  “So now what do I do?”

  I looked at the yellow-brown brew. “Make some more?”

  My father decidedly tipped the contents of his cup back into the jug.

  “Do you have wheat beer?”

  “Yes, I do. Good idea. Besides, too much coffee isn’t good for you. I’ve had so much heartburn recently. Christine, would you like a juice perhaps?”

  “Juice?” I wondered if Kalli was concerned about my young age.

  “Well, you can have a liqueur if you’d prefer that.”

  So he hadn’t meant my age, but the fact that wheat beer was a man’s drink.

  “No, no liqueur thank you, Kalli. Just water is fine.”

  “I’m just going down to the cellar, back in a moment.”

  My father watched him go and leaned over to me. “He’s really out of his depth without his wife. If he can’t even make coffee, how’s he looking after himself? I think I’m going to look after him for a bit; I can’t just watch. After all, that’s what friends are for.”

  Before I could ask exactly what he meant by “look after him,” Kalli came back. He opened the two beer bottles, put glasses down, and poured.

  “So,” he raised his glass and nodded to us, “welcome to the island.”

  My father and he drank. Then Kalli looked at me questioningly.

  “Aren’t you drinking anything? Oh God, you wanted water. Heinz, are you this forgetful, too?”

  “No, I have a wonderful memory. It comes from doing the guided tours. And I do a few sudokus now and then too. You have to train your brain cells, you know. It helps prevent senility.”

  “Oh, I help out with guided tours here too. And…”

  “But Nordeney is much smaller than Sylt. You don’t have that much to remember.”

  “Heinz, please. I’ll give you a tour around the island tomorrow; you’d be amazed.”

  My throat was really dry. I cleared it pointedly, and Kalli turned toward me.

  “I think it’s great that you’re on vacation with your father. Katharina would never suggest something like that. She went on some wellness weekend with Hanna once, somewhere in the east. With saunas and moisturizers, you know the sort. But I’m only her father, after all; I wasn’t invited. All they wanted me to do was foot the bill.”

  “Why didn’t they go to a spa?” asked my father, amazed. “They could get that for free if a doctor prescribed it, you know.”

  I swallowed, gazing longingly at his beer glass. He picked it up and gave me a reproachful look.

  Kalli seemed unsure. “What kind of spa?”

  “Well, a mother-child spa. They must have them out here, too.”

  Kalli shook his head. “But that’s only for mothers with small children. Katharina is already thirty-five.”

  “So what? She’s still Hanna’s child, isn’t she? Christine, have you ever thought about doing something like that with Mom? You’ve both been paying health insurance contributions for years, so it’s about time you put in a claim.”

  I moistened my lips with my tongue. “Kalli, could you maybe fetch my water?”

  He gave me a friendly smile. “Of course, Christine.” Then he just turned back to my father.

  “You really think I should give that a try? Neither of them have ever been to a spa. Why would they? They never had anything wrong with them to warrant going. I mean, Katharina used to be a little too thin perhaps, but you should see her now.”

  One hour and two photo albums later, I made my excuses. Kalli and my father wanted to go for a short bike ride so Kalli could show him a bit of the island and then see our apartment.

  I bought a bottle of water at a small kiosk nearby to gulp down en route. Maybe my father’s passion for sudoku would rub off on his old friend. He could do with a little memory training.

  When I got back, I found Marleen and Dorothea in the garden, bent over a few drawings on the table. Dorothea raised her head as I walked over.

  “Did you manage to shake him off?”

  I sank into the lounge chair.

  “He has a new mission now: saving Kalli from neglect and malnourishment. So, what’s new here? Dorothea?”

  “What do you mean?” she asked innocently.

  “Come on, I saw how you were staring at that architect’s butt. Heinz thinks he’s dangerous, by the way. He can smell drugs, excesses, and criminal tendencies, so watch out.”

  Marleen wrinkled her forehead. “Are you taking about Nils? Why were you staring at his butt? And what’s all this about drugs?”

  Dorothea pushed her sunglasses up onto her head. “I just think he’s very sweet, that’s all. Don’t give me that horrified look, Marleen. I’m single and it’s summer, and I can look, can’t I? Seriously though, Christine, what is it with the drugs?”

  “Oh, my father’s always suspicious when men have long hair. Especially when it’s tied back in a ponytail. A man with a ponytail! I mean, come on. You know about guys like that. Onno was a little skeptical, too.”

  Dorothea gathered up her sketches. “Well, I’m driving to Enden with him tomorrow to buy paint. And I hope Heinz remembers that I’m not his daughter. I don’t want him messing up my love life.”

  I didn’t respond. What point was there in worrying her?

  Two hours later we were standing in the kitchen, getting the evening meal ready. My eyes were flooded with tears from chopping the onions. Suddenly, we heard a commotion from outside: metal crashing into stone, glass shattering, a male voice cursing. I jumped so quickly that the knife slipped out of my hand. Blinded by tears and sucking my bleeding thumb, I ran out into the courtyard, followed by Marleen and Dorothea.

  “Dad, what happened?”

  My father was crouching next to a bicycle that lay beneath a tipped-over garbage container. Kalli was leaning his bike neatly against the fence behind him. He looked at us apologetically.

  “Heinz rode into the container.”

  My father stood up and brushed off his trousers.

  “How am I supposed to ride a bike that has no rear brakes? Only five gears, no front suspension, no rear suspension, and to top it all off the brakes are shot. Kalli, you can ride this death trap yourself.” As his gaze fell on me, he stopped short.

  “Why on earth are you crying? And since when have you started sucking your thumb again? Marleen, you really should move that garbage container. You only see it once it’s too late.”

  Marleen and Dorothea heaved the container back upright.

  “Well, I don’t know why you had to ride into the courtyard at such a breakneck speed,” Marleen said. “The container’s been there for years, and you’re the first person to have a problem with it.”

  “Well, we were really hungry. When’s dinner ready?”

  “As soon as the garbage is back in the container.” Marleen pressed a broom into my father’s hands and went back to the kitchen. My father gave Kalli the broom and followed her. I sucked on my thumb and watched Kalli start to sweep the rubbish together. Then I followed my father.

  “Kalli’s sweeping up.”

  “Well that’s the least he can do. It was his bike, after all. I could have been killed.”

  “Dad!”

  “Heinz!”

  “Well, it’s true. But maybe I’ll bring him a brush; otherwise he’ll just make even more of a mess. And Christine, will you please take your thumb out of your mouth! What’s Kalli going to think?”

  After I’d put a bandage on my thumb and set the table, I called my father and his friend to say that dinner was ready. They went off to the bathroom together, came back with clean hands and combed
hair, and sat down at the table like two little boys, their faces full of anticipation.

  “Cycling sure works up a good appetite.”

  My father pulled a bowl of potato salad toward him and piled his plate full.

  “Heinz, you need to fit some fish on your plate still.”

  “Oh yes.” He kept the spoon in his hand, pulled Kalli’s plate toward him, and heaped half of his salad onto it. “There, now it’ll fit.”

  “Thank you.” Kalli smiled and looked shyly at Marleen. “I just came along with him; Heinz said it would be okay. I hope it’s okay with all of you, too.”

  “Of course.” Marleen put some fish on his plate. “I always cook too much anyway. Guten appetit.”

  My father held his plate out to Marleen. “See, Kalli, I told you it’d be fine. Just come and eat with us every day. It’s only for a week, until Hanna gets back. And maybe you’ll manage to convince me that Nordeney can give Sylt a run for its money.”

  “Why wouldn’t it?” Dorothea took the fish plate from Marleen.

  “Oh, Kalli was showing off and bragging that the island gets 320,000 tourists every year. But we get twice as many on Sylt.”

  “Sylt is much bigger, though.”

  “That has nothing to do with it.” My father chewed enthusiastically. “And Kalli wants to show me the lighthouse tomorrow.”

  Kalli looked at me proudly. “The highest building on the island. One hundred and eighty feet. You have a wonderful view over the water from it.”

  “Pah!” My father piped in again. I’d feared as much. “The lighthouse in Kampen is two hundred feet high. Now that’s a lighthouse. And—”

  Marleen interrupted him. “But our lighthouse is the oldest on the coast. It was built in 1874.”

  My father smiled lightly. “All I can say is, Kampen: 1856. I win again.”

  I watched him as he dismantled his fish and helped himself to more potato salad. He seemed to be really enjoying himself. I started to have hopes of a relaxing vacation after all. Sometimes I can get a little carried away by the mood.

  A Handsome Stranger

  * * *

  “Christine! Christiiiiine!”

  I nearly fell right out of bed. My father was standing there in his pajamas. It was seven in the morning.

  “What’s wrong? Are you trying to give me a heart attack?”

  “She’s gone.”

  Slowly, I sat up and rubbed my eyes.

  “Who?”

  “Who do you think?! Dorothea. There’s no trace of her, she’s vanished.”

  I lay back down and shut my eyes. “She’s gone to Emden to buy paint.”

  “Why?”

  “Because she needs something to paint the restaurant with.”

  “But does she know her way around Emden?”

  “It’s fine, Nils is with her.”

  He gasped for air. “You’ve let her go off to a strange place with that long-haired terrorist? Do you girls not have a scrap of sense between you?”

  He sank down onto the edge of the bed and buried his face in his hands dramatically. Sighing, I sat back up.

  “Dad, don’t make such a fuss. Nils is an interior designer, and I’m sure he’s not a terrorist. And Dorothea is forty-two and, may I remind you, not your daughter.”

  “I know how old she is, and so what? I’m seventy-three and I’m still wrong about people sometimes.”

  “Well that’s a new one on me. I thought you never made mistakes.”

  “Don’t take that tone with me. I’m still your father you know.”

  He got up abruptly and left the room. I counted to twelve, then stood up and followed him. He was sitting on his bed and staring at the cupboard.

  “What’s wrong?”

  He rubbed his bare feet together and didn’t say a word.

  “Dad! Talk to me!”

  “Your mother’s lying there in the hospital, and yet again, you’re exposing yourselves to danger and keeping things from me.”

  His words were devoid of any logic, but still made me feel guilty. I sat down next to him.

  “Oh, Dad. An artificial knee joint is a routine operation nowadays. I spoke to Mom on the phone yesterday and she was perfectly calm. And we can give her a call later. Okay?”

  “Your mother is always calm—that’s the problem. If I didn’t worry about things then no one would realize how serious things are. But I can’t take responsibility for everything, so if Dorothea’s body gets fished out of the North Sea tonight then don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

  I stood up. “That’s enough, Dad. Go into the bathroom, get dressed, and then we can have breakfast. Then you can give Onno a hand and meet Kalli afterward. Come on, the sun is shining.”

  He looked at me. “Why do you always sleep in those old T-shirts? Mom bought such pretty nightgowns. Hopefully she’ll live to wear them.”

  “Dad!” I went to brush my teeth. Today was clearly going to be a Scooby-Doo day. No Paul Newman eyes to be seen. Well, we’d just have to push through it.

  After fetching us some coffee, Marleen sat down at our table.

  “So, Heinz, are you still keen to give us a hand?”

  “I’ve never neglected my responsibilities, not in my whole life.”

  “Onno just called, and his assistant Horst has a bad flu. So he asked if you could help.”

  “I need to eat my breakfast first.”

  Marleen looked at me questioningly. I gestured to her to follow me into the kitchen, then tried to explain. “My mother’s going into the hospital today and has her operation tomorrow morning. He’s worried and in a funny mood. It’ll be like that until tomorrow lunchtime unless he’s distracted by something.”

  “Well, I certainly have enough for him to do. Onno really needs a hand, and some new guests are arriving today too. A family with two small children, and a man traveling alone. Heinz could pick up the family from the harbor later for me.”

  “Great, tell him that. He needs things to do.”

  An hour later I was emptying the first load from the dishwasher. My father had trotted off to the restaurant with a pained expression on his face. He hadn’t even eaten an egg. His breakfast had consisted solely of half a bread roll, and the fact that he’d spread Nutella on it was a clear sign to me of how distraught he was. I decided to give my sister a call later. She hadn’t left for her own trip yet and was planning to take my mother to the hospital. I realized I wasn’t even sure when her appointment was.

  Two couples still sat in the breakfast room, and, of course, Frau Weidemann-Zapek and her friend Klüppersberg. Seeing me, they waved excitedly.

  “Good morning, Christine. Could you please bring us a little more tea? Oh, and where’s your dear father?”

  I forced a smile and shrugged my shoulders. “I’ve no idea where he is, but I’m sure he’ll be here at some point.”

  I was curious how long they would wait. There was plenty for them to eat, in any case. And at least it would give my father some peace.

  As I turned around I saw Gesa, laden down with bedding, standing at the door to the breakfast room.

  “Christine, the new guest is already here. Could you come to reception for a moment? Marleen has just headed off to the restaurant.”

  “I’ll be there right away.”

  I gave Dad’s groupies a nod and hurried toward the reception desk. It wasn’t even nine yet. Why had the new guest taken such an early ferry? Maybe it was a retiree, another lonely man in his midseventies who could join forces with Onno, Kalli, and Dad. Or even be new prey for the merry duo in the breakfast room.

  I banged my hip on the doorframe and cursed. Then I caught a glimpse of the new guest’s profile and bit back the rest of my outburst. I immediately regretted putting on my old pink-and-black striped T-shirt and the fact that I hadn’t put my makeup on properly. Hoping my father wouldn’t pick this moment to come back, I blushed. What a wonderful looking man. I suddenly realized what my type was. Maybe there was something to the whole l
ove at first sight thing, after all. I started to sweat. My legs wobbling, I walked behind the reception desk and stood there, staring at him. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find my voice. Or my brain, for that matter; I felt like an idiot. He looked at me with his hazel-brown eyes.

  “Good morning,” he said in a velvety soft, deep voice. “My name is Johann Thiess. I have a reservation.”

  “Yes, it’s very early, at the moment.” I cleared my throat and searched in vain for the basic constructs of a sentence. “Erm…hello…I mean, welcome. So, the key.”

  I crouched down behind the desk and acted as though I was looking for the room key. I bit myself in the knee, for some reason thinking that might help.

  Johann Thiess had bent forward and was watching my gymnastics with interest. I stood up slowly, trying to retain some scrap of dignity, and closed my eyes for a moment. He was wonderful. And I had botched it up. He was probably wondering why a nice guesthouse like this employed such crazy staff; the type who wore striped T-shirts with red shorts. I remembered I still hadn’t found a pumice stone to get rid of the pen marks on my leg. Then a miraculous thing happened: he held out his hand to me. Before I could blissfully take it—I was already hearing the string orchestra start up—he said, “Could I have my key? It’s just that I’ve been traveling through the night and I’m very tired.”

  Marleen came to my rescue, suddenly appearing next to me.

  “Good morning. Herr Thiess, that’s your name, isn’t it?” She shook his hand. “You’re in room nine, on the first floor, with a sea view. Christine, sorry, I took the register with me. So, here’s your key, and I hope you have a lovely stay.”

  With a smile, he picked up his suitcase and went over to the stairs. Marleen gave me a shove.

  “What’s up with you? You look like you’re in shock.”

  “Marleen, I acted like I’d lost my senses!”

  “I noticed, and you looked like it too. What’s wrong?”

  “I’ve no idea. Maybe it was love at first sight?”

  Marleen put her hand on my forehead. “Are you on something?”