Crystal

by Walter Dean Myers

  “This is the waiting room?” Crystal sat with Jerry Goodwin in the ornately designed room.

  “The Blue Room is famous,” Jerry said. “I mean, have you ever been in a room with blue rugs, blue curtains, a blue piano, and blue furniture before?”

  “And it looks like somebody’s living room,” Crystal said.

  “Let me tell you something about Marc Everby.” Jerry lowered his voice. “The guy’s the most powerful man in the magazine business. As a matter of fact, he’s the most powerful man in the girlie business. If he wants a room that’s all blue, that’s what he’s going to get.”

  “You said Loretta talked to him about me?”

  “Yeah.” Jerry turned away from Crystal, inspecting the room.

  Soft music came from somewhere in the room. It sounded vaguely Spanish with lots of drums. Crystal could feel the excitement in her stomach. Part of it was from Jerry. She could tell he was nervous, too. Even the way he said La Femme was different. He said it with a kind of reverence.

  There were pictures of girls on the wall. All of them were beautiful, most of them were nude. Crystal swallowed hard.

  “What exactly did Loretta say to Mr. Everby?”

  “She told him that you were young and fresh,” Jerry said. “She must have been convincing, because he doesn’t see many people in person.”

  “She said he was anxious to see me,” Crystal said. “That sounds good.”

  “Did she tell you that he wants a new set of pictures?” Jerry asked. “Something a little fleshier?”

  The music seemed farther away. Crystal glanced at Jerry, wondering what to say.

  “I’m only sixteen,” she said. “I can’t…”

  “He probably wouldn’t risk anything too sexy in the magazine, but he’ll want them for the magazine’s files.”

  “Just how sexy does he mean?”

  “You can always say no,” Jerry said, “if that’s what you want to do.”

  “I couldn’t pose for him nude.” Crystal shook her head.

  “You wouldn’t be posing for him,” Jerry said. He put his hand on Crystal’s arm. “He would get the photos, but he’s not a photographer.”

  “I couldn’t…”

  “That’s what I thought, too,” Jerry said. “That’s why I was disappointed that Loretta hadn’t spoken to you. If you were my client, I’d of spoken to you.”

  “I feel like leaving right now,” Crystal said. She felt the tears stinging her eyes.

  “Look, Crystal, you’re a big girl now. People are talking about big things for you.” Jerry lifted Crystal’s chin gently. “If he asks us for photographs, you owe it to yourself, I guess you even owe it to Loretta, not to make a decision right away.”

  “I know I’m not going to pose without my clothes on!” Crystal hissed.

  “I’m not saying that you should,” Jerry said. “All I’m saying is that you should at least see what Marc says. You weigh the benefits, you weigh what it means to you. All you have to do today is to give him a pretty smile and then you make your own decision later, okay?”

  Crystal suddenly felt very small. She looked down at the rug. Out of the corner of her eye she saw a movement. It was a cat. Its long hair was actually dyed the same color as the rug. It sat, its pug face immobile, staring at Crystal.

  “Mr. Everby’s on his way!” The voice came from behind them. Jerry stood up quickly, and for a moment, Crystal thought that he was going to stand at attention.

  Crystal turned and saw that Marc Everby’s secretary was standing in the doorway, holding the door open. She was tall, a lot taller than Crystal, and the smile she wore seemed to be more a part of her face than a sign of pleasure.

  It was just past noon, but Marc Everby wore a silk house-coat over his slacks. He had deep lines on the side of his face and just a touch of gray in his eyebrows.

  “Jerry, good to see you.”

  “Good to see you, Marc.” Crystal watched as the two men shook hands.

  “And this is the young lady I’ve heard so much about?”

  “Crystal, meet Marc Everby.”

  “How do you do?”

  “I’m doing fine, just fine, young lady.” Marc Everby smiled warmly.

  “I was just telling Crystal that La Femme has been in business since long before she was born.”

  “I’m sure Crystal’s not interested in the business side of the magazine,” Marc said. He sat in a high-backed chair and crossed his legs.

  “No.” Jerry looked for another place to sit. “I’m sure she’s not.”

  “You’re really a fresh face,” Marc said. His voice was deep, almost caressing his words as he spoke.

  “Thank you.”

  “I can see a nice spread on you,” Marc went on. “You’re not bosomy enough for mid-book, but we can put you in the front of the book. You ever do any hamburger ads?”

  “Hamburger ads? No,” Crystal said.

  “That’s good,” Marc said. “We’re doing a layout of girls who work in fast-food places, in September, and I wouldn’t want to do another hamburger girl.”

  “Crystal’s been doing a lot of high-fashion stuff,” Jerry said. “She’s a mild sensation in Italy.”

  “Can you get the roundness out of her cheeks, Jerry?” Everby stood and crossed to where Crystal was sitting. He moved her face from side to side. “Maybe she ought to have her molars taken out.”

  “I don’t think so,” Crystal said, smiling.

  “Oh, why not?”

  “Well…” Crystal looked at Marc Everby and saw that he wasn’t at all kidding. “I just never thought of it.”

  “That’s for the people who are handling you to think about,” Marc said. “You want to stand up and let me take a look at you.”

  Crystal stood and moved away from Marc. Then she turned slowly so that he could see her.

  “She has a good figure,” Jerry said. “Very nice bone structure. Good calves for a Black girl.”

  “Loretta said that Joe Sidney was considering her for a part in his new production?” Marc spoke to Jerry without turning his head away from Crystal.

  “Crystal doesn’t even know about the part yet,” Jerry said. “I’m afraid that you just let the cat out of the bag.”

  “You ready for stardom, Crystal?” Marc asked.

  “I hope so,” Crystal answered.

  “You need to do more than hope in this business,” Marc said. “But you’re pretty enough, that’s for sure. Is your body firm?”

  “I think so.”

  “You think so?” Everby glanced at Jerry and shook his head. “Stand up straight,” he said to Crystal.

  Before he touched her, she knew what he was going to do. He put his hands on her stomach and squeezed gently. Then he put his hand on her back and slid it down. Crystal held her breath as Marc Everby touched her. She tried to stop thinking, as well. If only she could shut out the room for a minute. The room, and Marc Everby, and Jerry. Just for a minute.

  “Send me some pictures,” he said, turning away. He crossed the room in long, loping steps. “I think we can use her.”

  “I’m so excited I don’t know what to do with myself.” Jerry Goodwin hadn’t spoken until the doors of the elevator had closed behind him and Crystal. “Do you realize what happened in there?”

  “You mean him feeling me up?” Crystal said.

  “You made an impression on Marc Everby! We’re going to be in La Femme!” Jerry put both hands to his head. “Marc Everby wants to use you in a layout!”

  “That’s good,” Crystal said, without feeling any of the emotion that Jerry was showing.

  “You in the mood to go someplace and celebrate?” Jerry asked.

  “I think I’m going to head home.”

  “Okay, look, I’ll call Loretta. What I want to do is to get you over to the studio as soon as possible. Maybe even tomorrow. We shoot as much as possible. We don’t want to blow this chance. Right?”

  “Right.”

  “And Crystal?�
�

  “Yeah.”

  “Look, I just want to tell you that you were a real pro in there.” Jerry put his hands on her shoulders. “Sometimes this business gets a little rough around the edges, but you handled it well. I’ll call you tomorrow, or maybe Loretta will call you, okay?”

  “Sure.”

  Crystal hurried home. It was cool and there were a few drops of rain falling. The sky was gray but bright, almost silver. When she got home, her mother was cooking. The hearty smell of the beef stew filled the kitchen.

  “How did it go?” Crystal’s mother had tasted the stew and held the wooden spoon inches from her mouth.

  “Okay, I guess,” Crystal said. “That Marc Everby’s got some office.”

  “Did you actually meet him?” Her mother turned and leaned against the table.

  “Yes,” Crystal said. “I didn’t think he was so great, though.”

  “Oh, he is!” Carol Brown said. She sat at the kitchen table. “He’s simply fabulous! Sit down and tell me about the meeting!”

  “Well…” Crystal sat at the end of the table. “First he kept us waiting forever.”

  “He’s probably got a thousand things to do,” her mother said. “I understand he runs that magazine with an iron hand. That’s why it’s been around so long.”

  “He said that maybe I should have my molars taken out,” Crystal said. “He was serious, too!”

  “It’s because your face is so round” was the quick reply. “You want something to eat?”

  “No.”

  “I think by next year you’ll lose that roundness,” her mother said. “It’s not that bad, anyway. You’ll have to watch your diet, though.”

  “Then he asked me to stand up and turn around, so he could look at me.”

  “Did you feel beautiful?”

  “Not exactly.”

  “You have to think beautiful at times like that, Crystal,” her mother said. “You have to tell yourself that you’re beautiful, and then project it.”

  “He put his hands on my stomach.”

  “You have a good body, I’m sure he could tell that. And you’ll keep it a long time, too. My mother kept her body, the firmness, until she was well into her thirties. Even with three children she was considered the prettiest Black woman in Beckley,” her mother said. “Did he say when he’d make a decision?”

  “He told Jerry to send over some photos,” Crystal said. “He thinks maybe he can use me in a layout.”

  “Oh, my God!” Crystal’s mother put her hand on her daughter’s arm. “You mean he’s actually going to…?”

  “I guess so,” Crystal said. “Jerry was really excited about it.”

  “Baby, it’s wonderful! It’s simply wonderful!”

  “I guess it is,” Crystal said.

  “Look, what do you say we turn off this stew and go out for dinner tonight? Let’s party!”

  “Mama, I’m tired. I’m really so tired. I’ve got to shower, too. I feel dirty.”

  “Okay, dear,” her mother said. “I’m sure it’s been a hard day for you.”

  “What…what do you think about him putting his hands on me?” Crystal asked.

  “It’s his business to judge girls,” Carol Brown said. “To him it’s probably no different than checking out the feel of a typewriter. People like him don’t even think of you as a girl. They think of you as part of their business.”

  “I guess that’s how I felt, too,” Crystal said.

  “That’s because you’re getting to be quite the professional.”

  The water felt good. Crystal had it as hot as she could stand it. She closed her eyes and imagined she was in a steaming pool somewhere far away. Perhaps it was a lush tropical island. There would be birds sitting in the trees above her. Maybe there would be a fawn prancing nearby. Yes, that would be all. Just the fawn, a few birds, and her.

  She thought about standing in Marc Everby’s office. She remembered him walking toward her, knowing that he would touch her. She almost knew how it would feel to have his hands on her.

  Quickly she forced her mind back to her jungle paradise. She washed slowly, shutting everything out of her mind.

  “Okay, so here’s the deal.” Pat sat across from Crystal in the library. “I want you to double-date with me and Donald and Charlie.”

  “With who?”

  “You know Donald and Charlie,” Pat said. “Charlie’s nice.”

  “He might be nice but I don’t know him, and why would I want to go out with him even if I did know him?”

  “Because my mother’s not going to let me go out with Donald by myself. She met Donald once and she knows Charlie’s mother. And she knows you. So, either you go out with me and Donald and Charlie or I can’t go out at all.”

  “You’re not that desperate for a date, Pat.”

  “Girl, don’t tell me how desperate I am. I am sixteen years old and have never, mind you, never been on a date with a real live boy. My mother doesn’t think I should go on a date until I finish high school.”

  “What’s so magical about finishing high school?”

  “That’s what I asked my mother,” Pat said. “And she wanted to know why I was so anxious to go on a date and what did I think I would be doing?”

  “So what did you tell her?”

  “I told her,” Pat said, “that I wanted to double-date with you because we were best friends. What I was thinking was that I didn’t know what I would be doing, but I sure wanted to find out.”

  “I don’t date,” Crystal answered. “Unless you call that creep, Sean Farrell, a date.”

  “I’d die to go out with Sean Farrell, even if he is a creep. There’s nothing wrong with a good-looking creep now and then.”

  “I’ll think about it,” Crystal said.

  “You want to think about it before Friday?” Pat said. “I kind of told my mother we were going out together Friday night.”

  “Pat, you are a mess. Suppose my parents say no?”

  “They’ll say yes,” Pat said. “And anyway, if I don’t start dating soon I’m going to be a bigger mess.”

  “It’s all in your head,” Crystal said.

  “No, it ain’t, it’s in my Social Studies class. You know who’s checking Donald out?”

  “Who?”

  “You know that skinny chick who thinks she looks like Lil’ Kim?”

  “That Mavis somebody? The one who runs around in those little short dresses?”

  “Her. She was throwing herself all up in his face and everything.”

  “Why? Donald’s not that cute.”

  “Yes, he is, Crissie,” Pat said. “I think he’s cute.”

  “Yeah, but you’re in love with the dude. You throw out that love and what you got? He’s sweet, but that’s about all.”

  “I think he’s cute, and now that he’s playing flute with Tito’s combo, everybody’s checking him out.”

  “You told me Donald only played classical music,” Crystal said. “Tito doesn’t play classical. He plays that salsa.”

  “Donald is getting into it, too,” Pat said. “He’s really good. That’s why Miss Thing is chasing him. And from what I hear, she’ll do anything to get a guy.”

  “I got to check with Mama,” Crystal said. “Where we supposed to be going Friday night?”

  “To this club that Donald says is really hot. And then I got to be home at twelve o’clock. I think my mama got a Cinderella complex.”

  “And who am I supposed to be? Your fairy godmother?”

  “And Donald will be my Prince Charming.”

  “With his dumb-butt poetry?”

  “With his dumb-butt poetry.” Pat sighed.

  Crystal had picked up a copy of La Femme on the way home from school. She lay across her bed, thumbing slowly through the pages. The girls in the magazine were beautiful. She looked closely at some of the pictures and saw that they had been shot with either a soft focus or developed that way. Loretta had told her about a model who started developin
g wrinkles around her eyes and the account photographer had used softer and softer focus to keep her career going.

  She knew boys in her school liked La Femme. They would sure buy it if they knew she was in it. Crystal looked at the faces of the girls. They were all supposed to be scientists. They looked happy enough, as if they enjoyed showing their bodies. Crystal could look at them, look at their smiles, and imagine that it was all right to pose the way they were. But when she imagined herself doing it, lying back on a couch with her legs…No, she couldn’t imagine it at all.

  “Crystal?”

  “Who is it?” Crystal pushed the copy of La Femme between her bed and the wall.

  “It’s me, Sister Gibbs. I got something for you.”

  “Come on in.” Crystal sat up quickly and dabbed cleansing cream on her face to hide the places where tears had smeared her makeup.

  “Look.”

  Crystal turned and saw Sister Gibbs bring her hands from behind her back. In the palm of her right hand was an orange puffy ball.

  “A kitten?” Crystal stood up to take a closer look.

  “I was walking down near that pet shop over on Fulton Street, down from Concord Baptist, and I seed this crowd, so I went over and took me a look. Guess what the fools got in the window?”

  “What?”

  “They got this little kitty in a cage with a snake.”

  “With a snake?”

  “Yeah, child.” Sister Gibbs sat heavily on the end of the bed. “Poor thing is trembling and shaking to beat all get-out. I marched myself right in there and asked them fools what in God’s name they was doing. They come talking about how they putting on a show so they can sell them some snakes.”

  “They were going to let the snake eat this kitten?”

  “Sure as I’m sitting here.” Sister Gibbs rested her elbows on her knees. “Now if that ain’t Satan’s handiwork, ain’t nothing is! You hear me?”

  “I hear you, Sister Gibbs.”

  “I snatched that kitty up and said if they don’t stop they evil ways I’m going right down to the S.P.C.A. and run ’em out of business!”