by Lena Hart
“Just because I didn’t want kids, doesn’t mean I would have turned my back on the one that I have,” he snapped. “He’s my son too. You should have told me about him.” He bit out those words with barely suppressed rage.
Mia placed her fingers on her temples, trying to soothe the headache pulsating there. “Yes, I admit I should have. I’m sorry. But that doesn’t change the fact that I have him to worry about now. And if you really care then you’ll help us keep our home.”
Nate glared at her, saying nothing. She knew an apology would not make up for what she’d done, but she didn’t know what else he wanted her to say.
“Mommy?”
They both started at the small voice coming from across the room. Mia was the first to her feet. “Yes, baby?”
“I have to potty.”
She turned to Nate.
“I’ll take him,” he said, brushing past her.
A few minutes later, they both came back to the living room where she still sat. An animated Mikey was going a mile a minute as Nate paid close attention to their son’s excited chatter.
When Mikey finally noticed her, he came running to her side. “Mommy, guess what?”
She smiled down at his excited face. “What?”
“I have a daddy!” he exclaimed.
Mia’s eyes shot up to Nate’s. He shrugged, his tension and anxiety visible.
“Someone had to tell him.”
Mia brought her attention back to Mikey but couldn’t stop the moisture that gathered in her eyes. “That’s right, you do,” Mia said with a soft smile.
“Can I keep him?” her son asked with anxious excitement. “Please.”
The tears that threatened clogged Mia’s throat. She didn’t trust herself to speak. Instead, she placed a quick kiss on his forehead and brought him up to her lap.
“Yes, of course,” she whispered thickly, avoiding the dark gaze that bored into her from across the room.
Nate watched the excited energy that boiled over his son’s little body and livened up his quiet condo.
He glanced over at Mia, who watched their son with calm patience. There was still a lot for them to discuss but, for tonight, he’d let it rest. Partly because of the fatigue etched on her face and partly because he still needed to digest and process everything.
He was a father.
That knowledge was something he was still getting used to. He had always been careful to protect himself and the woman he was with. With Mia, however, their lovemaking had always been wild, intense. It could be the reason why their birth control hadn’t been effective.
If Mikey’s birthday was in January, that meant he had gotten her pregnant around April. In Galena. Memories of that week came flooding to him. It had been a nice getaway from the city, one he had been disappointed to see end. Before the trip, he had spent weeks traveling across the country for his own company and at his father’s request. Not being able to see or touch her had been frustrating. He never made a big thing about his birthday, but Mia had wanted to do something special for his big three-oh and he could think of nothing better than to hide away somewhere with her, where they could eat, relax, and make love. He had rented a vacation home and for one week, they lived in their own private oasis.
They had spent the days enjoying the quiet, country scenery and the nights…the nights were unforgettable. They couldn’t get enough of each other. She had been as wild as he, clawing at his back, rising up to meet his heavy thrust. They had sweated and panted together, getting as close as two bodies could possibly get.
Nate shifted to hide his body’s reaction at the still vivid memory. Sometime during that week, they made Mikey. Though Nate still struggled between his anger and his unwavering lust for her, he had no regrets. Together, they had created another life. He couldn’t accept or excuse her decision to keep Mikey from him, but then he also couldn’t ignore his role in making her feel as if she had to.
“Daddy?”
Nate instinctively jerked at the name. Though it wasn’t an unpleasant sound, it was something that would take some getting used to.
“Yeah, buddy?” he asked gently.
“Can I have some juice?”
He looked helplessly at Mia. He didn’t think he had any. He didn’t entertain much in his apartment and was certainly not equipped to entertain kids as young as Mikey, or guests of any age for that matter. He didn’t even keep liquor in his apartment anymore. Not that he didn’t enjoy a drink on occasions, but after their breakup, he had found himself indulging in the mind numbing liquid too frequently. Fortunately, he had managed to end the bad habit before it got a chance to root itself permanently in his life. He now had a personal rule to only drink socially. Never alone and never at home.
“I don’t think I have any.” Nate checked his watch. If he left now, he could probably pick some up.
“It’s all right,” Mia said with a soft smile of understanding. “I think I have a juice box in one of my tote bags.” She got up and fished through a large, yellow and brown bag that had been left in the foyer. She still wore the light sweater she’d put over her white cami, yet it did little to conceal her lush curves hidden underneath. She walked back to where they were sitting and handed Mikey a green and red juice carton.
“Tomorrow, we can go shopping for groceries,” Nate said, watching Mikey suck up the red liquid from the straw. Nate couldn’t stop looking at him. It felt too surreal, looking at this little person who was a part of him.
“Thanks, but that’s not necessary. We’re not staying long.”
Irritation at Mia’s dismissive words rose in him, but Nate shoved it away. He didn’t want to start another argument tonight, especially not in front of Mikey. There would be time tomorrow to hash this all out.
“We’ll figure that out later,” Nate merely replied.
Her attention was momentarily stolen away when Mikey handed her the juice carton so she didn’t argue.
“Finished?” she asked, grabbing the carton. At his vigorous nod, she placed it on the center table and stood up. “Okay then,” she said, holding out her hand. “Time for bed.”
“But Mommy, I’m not tired.” Mikey continued to whine, pout, and protest as Mia ushered him back to the guest room. Nate watched the whole scene with fascination and mild amusement. He knew a handful of people with children and didn’t spend a whole lot of time with them, so he could only imagine the patience needed to deal with that kind of energy. The way Mia was handling their son seemed to come naturally. She was gentle yet stern, loving but still firm.
Something inside him warmed at the sight. He had never experienced that with his own parents—certainly never his mother. Was it something that came naturally to Mia as a mother? Could he be that kind of father to Mikey?
The thought jarred him. He didn’t know where or why it had surfaced, but he realized he wanted to be the kind of father to Mikey his father had never been to him. He wanted to be a good father to the little boy whose young features closely resembled his. Nate wanted Mikey in his life.
Mia came back to where he sat, drawing his attention away from his new, yet exhilarating, thoughts. She leaned down to grab the empty juice carton and glanced over at him.
“Where can I toss this?”
Nate stood. “I’ll throw it out.” He reached for the carton then jerked back. “Shit.” A stream of red liquid squirted from the thin straw and landed on the front of his shirt.
Mia’s eyes were wide with horror. “Oh my God! I’m so sorry!”
“Its fine,” Nate assured her. “Here let me take that so it doesn’t drip everywhere.”
Nate went to the kitchen and dumped the remaining juice in the sink. Mia was close behind him and before he realized what she was doing, she wet a kitchen towel and began dabbing at the red stains on his shirt. He wouldn’t have minded her touch if it had been focused on him and not the damn shirt.
“I’m so sorry,” she said again, her slender face filled with mortification.
/> “Mia, its fine. It was an accident.” One he had actually caused. He didn’t realize until it was too late that there was still juice left inside the small carton when he grabbed for it.
She continued blotting at the stains until water soaked through and the stains were now a faint pink. He grabbed her hand to stop her frantic dabbing. “It’s just a shirt,” he whispered.
She stilled and glanced up at him. “I know. It’s just…it looks expensive.”
“It’s not,” he lied, wanting to erase the agitation from her eyes. “Besides,” he continued with a small grin, “it’ll wash. If not, I’ll just buy a new one.”
She visibly relaxed, then glanced away, nodding. Her nearness started to wreak havoc on his senses. Her fresh, sweet scent was an erotic tease. He unconsciously tightened his hand over hers. At the small action, her eyes widened then flew up to his. He ignored the surprised confusion on her face. Instead he focused on her wide, full lips. He remembered their soft sweetness and wanted to taste them again. Driven by a force stronger than his own will power, Nate leaned down…
Mia jerked away from him and took a step back, effectively bringing him back to reality. He cursed himself silently as his regrets and frustration strained against his slacks. The last thing he needed to do was complicate their situation with his lust.
“Sorry,” he murmured roughly.
With her back now turned to him, she nodded, saying nothing.
“You must be tired,” he said quietly. “Why don’t you take the back bedroom at the end of the hall?”
She fidgeted with the towel in her hand then placed it on the counter, still not looking at him. “That’s okay. I’ll sleep with Mikey.”
“The bed in the other room is bigger and you’ll be more comfortable.” Nate purposely didn’t mention it was actually his bedroom, as it would have only increased her obvious discomfort. “Besides, why disturb him when there’s plenty of space for us to spread out.”
She didn’t argue with him and he suspected fatigue and weariness must be weighing on her.
As Nate lay awake on the sofa, his thoughts were filled with the woman sleeping in his bed, the woman who had birth him a son. It occurred to him that it was already too late. Things between them had gone beyond complicated.
8
Nate woke up to a light tugging on his arm. Through the large windows, early morning light streamed into the living room and onto the sofa where he slept. Beside him, a bed-rumpled Mikey stood pushing at his arm.
Mikey.
Memory of the night before pierced through his sleep-fogged mind. For a moment, he’d forgotten. He was a father now.
“Daddy?” the small voice came. “I forgot where the toilet is and I have to potty.”
Nate sat up, now alert. As he led Mikey into the bathroom, he recalled the moment last night when he told Mikey who he was. Their son’s oblivion of who he was and their relationship to each other had bothered Nate. A lot.
“Mikey, do you know who I am?” Nate asked when they were alone in the brightly lit bathroom.
Mikey had nodded. “You’re the man from the hotel room.”
Nate smiled softly. “Yeah,” he’d said gently. “I’m also your dad.”
Mikey stared at him curiously. “I never had a daddy before. Mommy said not everybody has one.”
That admission had irritated Nate, but he didn’t let Mikey see it. “Your mom was just waiting for the right time to bring you to me,” Nate explained.
“Are we coming to live with you now?”
Nate regarded him closely. “Do you want to?”
Mikey nodded his head eagerly. “I like it here better than the other place.”
Nate smiled at that. His son then proceeded to tell him about their long drive to Chicago and the things he’d seen along the way.
His son’s excited chatter from last night now spilled into this morning. Nate didn’t mind. He smiled and nodded, asking questions when necessary. He answered a few peculiar ones of his own too, like how did the water in the sink get so cold when it wasn’t in the fridge. Nate’s answer had been embellished, but Mikey didn’t seem to notice.
Once they were done in the bathroom, Nate went to check in on Mia. The door to his bedroom was left partly open and Nate peered in. He immediately found her sleeping form in the middle of the wide bed. She looked soft and inviting. He would have given anything to be lying next to her.
That was wishful thinking, however, remembering the way she pulled away from him. Nate turned to leave but before he could react, Mikey pushed past him, running full speed toward the bed. He grabbed his son just before he reached the bed and carried him out of the bedroom.
“Shh,” Nate said once they were out of the room. “Mommy’s sleeping.”
He brought Mikey to the kitchen but realized he didn’t have anything suitable to feed a four-year-old for breakfast. He found some orange juice but didn’t have a cup small enough for his small hands. The tote bag Mia had rummaged through last night seemed to be well supplied so he grabbed it. Inside, he found a small green plastic cup with a matching lid and straw, as well as another juice carton, a few snacks, some toys, books, wet wipes, napkins, and a travel size first aid kit. Nate’s lips quirked up. She had come prepared for anything.
“Looks like we’re gonna have to go out for breakfast,” Nate said to Mikey, pouring orange juice into the small green cup. “What do you want to eat?”
“Cheetos!” Mikey exclaimed, grabbing the snack Nate had lain on the counter.
While Mikey munched on the cheesy puff chips, Nate surveyed his kitchen to see what supplies he’d need. He figured between him and Mikey, they could do the grocery shopping while Mia slept.
Nate left a quick note for her, got himself and his son dressed, and within minutes they were out the door.
The cool, smooth sheets brought Mia softly awake. She caught the warm, spicy scent on the pillow and sprang up, disoriented.
She was in Nate’s bed, in his room. She looked around as memories of last night came rushing back to her. Mia fell back against the pillows with a heavy sigh.
Last night, she had recognized his scent the moment she had crawled into bed. It had been so inviting, so comforting, she had fallen asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
However, she couldn’t stay in his bed forever. She would have to get up and face him again. She groaned at the thought.
The awkward moment in the kitchen last night played back in her head. She was too in-tuned with him not to recognize the sharp desire that had radiated from him—or the frustration that flared when she’d pulled away.
Deep in her core, Mia wanted his kiss, his touch. Badly. But her supercharged senses wouldn’t have been able to handle it.
Mia groaned again before rolling out of the large bed. The apartment was strangely quiet and she immediately went to the guest bedroom. Empty.
She suppressed the panic threatening to rise and walked through the apartment, calling out for Mikey.
When she got to the kitchen, she found the note next to the half-eaten bag of Cheetos.
Mikey and I went out to buy food. We’ll be back soon.—N
Mia had told him they wouldn’t be staying long, but if he insisted on ignoring her, she wouldn’t make a fuss. Let him do what he wanted. She just needed to know if he intended to help them or not so they could be on their way.
It wasn’t lost on her that he hadn’t given her an answer last night. Then again, she had dropped a few bombshells on his lap, the main one being Mikey, so she could understand if he needed some time to let it all sink in.
Right now, she would just have to wait for them to get back.
Mia cleaned up the mess they’d left in the kitchen, making a mental note to tell Nate, and remind her son, that Cheetos weren’t an appropriate breakfast food.
Eventually, she moved the rest of their bags into the guest bedroom. Because she didn’t know how long they were staying, she didn’t bother unpacking. The last thing
she wanted was to scare Nate into thinking they were moving in, she thought wryly.
Curiosity, however, got the better of her and she began to explore his neatly kept and expensively furnished apartment. The condo had three bedrooms, and one of them had been converted into an office.
Though Nate’s apartment was elegant and chic, there was no real warmth in it. The kind of warmth that came from little things like pictures or plants or just simply…color. The decor was mainly whites, blacks, and grays with superficial artwork on the walls instead of family photos. There had been a greeting card with a picture of an older couple on it in his office that read, Happy Holidays from the Carlson’s.
Besides that small memento, there was nothing else.
His bedroom had a walk-in closet being shamefully underused, but filled with his scent. She ran her fingers along some of his hanging shirts, enjoying the feel of the soft material, visualizing them adorning his hard frame.
She eventually left the closet and entered the connecting bathroom. This bathroom was bigger than the one out in the hall with a standing shower encased by tall, frosted glass. It practically begged her to take a long, hot shower and she exhaled with deep pleasure. This made up for her brief stay at the grimy motel last night.
Twenty minutes later, dressed in a light coral summer dress, Mia sat in the living room hoping her son wasn’t driving Nate crazy. Shopping with Mikey could easily become an expedition if he wasn’t properly maintained.
The silence in the large apartment began to bother her. She turned on the television to fill it. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been without her son and his early morning chatter. Back home, there was always noise, whether it was from her son’s constant chatter, or Leah’s coming and goings, or from the television, there was always some sort of activity at their house. A few times, she had wished for some peace and quiet. Now that she had it, she found it unnerving…and lonely.
Thinking of her sister, Mia realized she’d forgotten to call her. When her call went unanswered, Mia left a voice message letting her sister know they had made it but were now staying with Nate.