Another Hood Love 2

by Jontu'

  I got up from the couch and brushed past Chris. He tried to grab my hand but I snatched it away and headed upstairs. “Give me a minute,” I threw over my shoulder with a roll of my eyes.

  After running around the cemetery all day, I decided to take a quick shower. I went into my closet and grabbed a pair of Aeropostale jeans with a plain white baby tee shirt and a yellow blazer paired with the Laney Jordan 5s. We were going to the speed racing track so I wanted to be comfortable but I also wanted to be cute. Once I got in the shower, I relaxed. I had to give myself a personal pep talk.

  I couldn’t let the things that people said affect me. I knew that Chris would never understand my feelings and there would be things that my heart felt that nobody would understand. I had to tread lightly because I knew that men let their egos get in the way of common sense sometimes.

  I finished my shower and dried off before applying some Beautiful Day body butter by Bath and Body Works. I threw on my clothes and headed downstairs. Once I walked into the living room, Chris had handed me a shot of 1800 that I gladly accepted. I had stopped breastfeeding about a month ago so I was now able to smoke and drink freely. I took my shot and we headed out the door.

  I was having so much fun. I hadn’t been free and out in a year and it felt good to be out having fun and not consumed with grief or stress. Chris was hella competitive but I liked it. We did 19 laps around the speed track and Chris came in 1st place but I had come in 4th. I just was glad to be having fun. Now I was ready to eat something and just get a little bonding time in.

  I had really grown to like Chris over the last few months, I wasn’t trying to be anything more than friends at the moment and I had voiced that to him in our conversations. Chris was pretty understanding but I knew that no guy was just going stick around forever, especially when they weren’t getting anything out of it. Chris was definitely boyfriend material but I wasn’t trying to rush anything.

  I came out the bathroom and met Chris at the exit of the building. We could have eaten something there but I didn’t really want to. It was loud and open and I wanted something quiet and cozy. I really wanted some jambalaya from California Pizza Kitchen so that’s where we were headed. Our drive over was pretty quiet. We had made limited small talk but nothing too heavy. We got to the restaurant and were seated within 20 minutes.

  I looked up, feeling Chris’ eyes on me as I was texting Gio checking in on the babies. I let Gio that I would be there in an hour and a half and then put my phone away. “What you looking at, sucka?” I asked, throwing a balled up napkin at him.

  “Don’t start nothing you can’t finish,” he said, throwing the napkin back.

  I laughed and took a sip from my strawberry-lime margarita. “So, Christian, what do you want from me? I mean, you call and text me all day and night and you have never asked for sex or anything more, so what are you looking for?” I asked, getting straight to the point, probably feeling my alcohol a little more than I thought.

  He chuckled a little. Chris was sexy as hell. He was tall and brown skinned with deep, piercing eyes. His hair was always on point with a crisp line up and his beard, Lord, his beard had me ready to just throw away all my inhibitions. But I remained cool and calm as he displayed his pearly whites. “Why I got to want something from you, though? Why I just can’t like you and enjoy your company?” he asked.

  “Because nothing in life is free, that’s why. Everybody wants something,” I said as the waitress came and set our food down in front of us.

  I had ordered the fettuccini jambalaya and Chris had ordered the fish tacos. We ate a little before we continued our conversation.

  “What do you want from me then? You said everybody wants something, so tell me what you want?” Chris said, looking up from his plate.

  I thought for a second. I was always so concerned with what Chris wanted from me but I had never stopped to think what I may have wanted from him. Chris didn’t know much about my past and I didn’t feel obligated to share it with him either. He didn’t know that I was a young, paid, ex-street hustler. Chris just thought that I was a spoiled girlfriend that was left with the spoils of my deceased boyfriend. He didn’t know that I still made thousands weekly from investments and that I had over a million dollars in offshore accounts.

  “I just want loyalty, friendship and somebody to chill with. Nothing too deep. I don’t really want love or a relationship. Just be who you been,” I said as I stared into his face.

  “That’s bullshit!”

  I looked up, shocked at the tone that Chris used. “Huh?” I asked.

  “I said that’s bullshit. Females always talking that shit about not wanting love and all that dumb shit but everybody wants to be loved.” He stared at me for a moment. “Sometimes you just have to take a chance and trust somebody. How long you going to be hung up on somebody that ain’t never coming back?” he asked.

  I tried to hold back my emotions but who was he to put a time limit on how long I held on to the past? I didn’t even respond to Chris’ statement. I excused myself to the restroom and took a couple of deep breaths. This was the second time tonight that Chris had made a reference to my feelings about Tone and I didn’t understand how somebody that was right here could be so worried about a man that was dead and gone. I pulled out my phone and texted Gio that I was on my way and after I handled my business, I left the restroom and returned to the table.

  Once I sat back down, I saw that Chris had paid the bill and had our plates packaged up. He had also ordered me a salted caramel pudding to go. I smiled because when I was looking at the dessert menu, I’d kept going back and staring at it but I had never decided if I had wanted it or not.

  “Thank you,” I said as I grabbed my food and purse and we got up to leave.

  We walked out the restaurant and Chris stepped in front of me and stopped me in mid step. “I hope I didn’t make you feel some type of way in there. If I did, then I apologize but I just want you to open up to me and quit trying to block me out because I could really be good for you,” he said, grabbing my hand. “I am willing to take shit slow with you. I want to make you my girl but there’s no rush. But if that’s not what you want now or even in the future, then tell me because we can just be friends. I ain’t no ugly nigga, baby. I get hoes,” he said while rubbing his hand across his waves and giving me a sexy grin.

  I laughed at his cockiness. “Boy, knock it off. We good. I get a little sensitive but I get over it. Just keep doing what you’re doing these walls are slowly coming down,” I said as I grabbed his hand and we continued walking towards the car.

  All in all, I’d enjoyed our date and I could see myself spending a lot more personal time with Chris. I wasn’t ready for sex but on some real shit, I was horny as hell. Once I got the babies settled in and they were sleep, I would be giving my rabbit a little quality time. I didn’t really care for vibrators and dildos but I wasn’t ready to make a sexual connection with another man at this time in my life.

  Tone was my first everything. I was only 18 years old and I had only been with him. The love, the sex, the bond was all new to me and he was the only nigga I’d had ever felt anything with. Yeah, I had liked guys before. Had even chilled with a few before me and Tone’s relationship, but that was it. At the moment, my mind, body and heart still belonged to Tone, but it was complicated because now it was like my heart and life were on standby. It was in the hands of somebody that could do nothing with it. Tone was gone and never coming back so I knew I had to let go sooner or later and possibly let Chris in or somebody eventually, but now I still wasn’t ready.

  We pulled into my driveway and I got out the car and walked over to my truck. I leaned in and placed my things on the seat and turned back around as Chris was walking up on me. He leaned into me, wrapping me into his warm embrace. It was kind of cold outside and I wasn’t dressed warm enough at all. I reached up and put my arms around his neck and stared into his eyes.

  “I like you, Jaeda. Quit playing wit a nigga,” Chr
is said as he kissed my lips. His lips felt so good and I couldn’t resist kissing him back.

  “I’m far from playing with you,” I said in between kisses.

  “Then be my girl then, my baby, my boo, my number one,” Chris said while placing soft kisses along my collarbone.

  I pushed back after one last kiss and allowed my hands to glide down his well-defined chest as I stared at him. “I had a great time, Christian. I’ll call you tomorrow or something.”

  He chuckled as I climbed into my truck and started the engine and turned my heat on high. “It’s all good, baby. Goodnight. At least let me know when you get back to the house.”

  I nodded as he walked off and hopped back into his car that was still running.

  Chapter 8

  “So what time are you going to be here? China needs help finishing up the sides and shit,” Gio said into the phone as I walked around the kitchen in my house and grabbed the breast milk out of the refrigerator and placed them inside of the diaper bag.

  It was the Fourth of July and Gio and China were hosting a barbecue at their new home for the holiday. They had just recently given birth to their daughter Charlie and moved into their new home. I was happy for them and couldn’t wait until their wedding.

  “I am packing the diaper bag now and I should be leaving in about ten minutes. Does she need me to pick up anything on my way over?” I asked.

  “Nah, just bring your slow ass on.”

  I laughed and hung up the phone.

  I walked into the living room and saw Baby Tone sitting up in his playpen looking like he wanted to break out. He was super active and wouldn’t ever sit still. He had rolling over and rocking on his knees down pat. Even if I was holding him he tried to push off of something and stand. Jahlisa was laying on the floor coloring in her coloring book as a movie played on the television that neither one of them were paying any attention to.

  “What y’all little stinkers in here doing?” I asked as I picked up Baby Tone out of his playpen.

  “Nothing. Tee-Tee, look at my picture,” Jahlisa said as she held up the picture of Strawberry Shortcake that she was coloring. Jahlisa was now two and she was all over the place. She talked very well and was full of energy. I loved the time I got to spend with her but boy, was it challenging when I was taking care of my 4 month old and her active ass at the same time. But I wouldn’t trade the moments in for anything in the world. I blew kisses on Baby Tone’s fat cheeks as he giggled and grabbed my cheeks, trying to place sloppy kisses on my eyes and cheeks. I was glad I didn’t put any make up on today because he would have for sure messed it up. “Okay, let’s go, guys. It’s time to go to Uncle Gio’s house. J, pick up your things and put them in your backpack,” I said while grabbing their things and waiting for her so that we could leave.

  We arrived at Gio’s house about 45 minutes later. I walked into the house and it was quiet but I could hear voices coming in from the backyard. “Hey, I didn’t even hear you walk in,” China said as I walked into the kitchen. She kissed Baby Tone’s cheeks and then leaned in for a hug. Jahlisa had already run off to the backyard. That kid was nowhere near shy and it was amazing how much personality she had.

  “Hey, honey. Where’s Charlie?” I asked, looking around for the baby.

  “Girl, Lexis ass came in here supposed to been helping me in the kitchen. Her ass done kidnapped the baby and ain’t showed her face since.”

  I laughed because that sounded just like Lexis to con her way out of any domestic duties. I went and grabbed Baby Tone’s bouncer that was in the hall closet and placed him inside before pulling it into the kitchen where he could still see me as I helped prepare the sides.

  “So, Miss Jaeda, where is your boo? He’s not on your arm today?” China asked and I shook my head.

  “I almost didn’t invite him. He just been smothering the hell out of me; but he’s coming later,” I responded as I began cutting up fruit to place on the fruit platter.

  “What you mean by smothering? Ya’ll is in a relationship now right?” she asked.

  “Yeah, I guess. We’re together but still taking it slow.”

  She shook her head. “Ain’t no taking it slow. Once you’re in a relationship, the only thing you can prevent from this point is babies. Feelings and everything else come at any time. So what is smothering? Shit, you and Tone stayed up under each other.” China looked at me as she began to add mayonnaise into the bowl of potatoes for the potato salad.

  I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know, China. He kind of just always is there/ he gets these moments where he is jealous and says dumb shit that has me like, ‘What? Really?’” I grabbed the bags of grapes and placed them in the sink as I washed them off and placed them on the platter.

  “Is he tripping off Tone or what?” asked China while mixing the potato salad and then placing it in the freezer to chill.

  “That too, but just everything. We could be out and if a nigga looks a little too long, he’s trippin’ like, ‘Oh, you know that nigga or something?’” I shook my head as I leaned against the countertop facing China and Lexis walked in with no baby in sight. “It’s irritating because I’m used to my nigga being confident. I know hella people, niggas and bitches, so it’s hard when he gets to flexxin’ about bullshit,” I said, taking a bite from a slice of mango.

  “Who we talking about, Chris retarded ass?” Lexis asked and I nodded my head. Lexis was team Chris a few months ago but recently she had been insisting that maybe I shouldn’t place all my eggs in one basket.

  “So how you feel about Chris, Lex? I’ve only met him a couple of times so I’m not really sure how he rubs me,” China asked Lexis.

  “I don’t know. At first, he seemed hella sweet and I felt like he was good for my bitch but now I just don’t know. He seem like he controlling and not to mention how he seems like he’s envious of the attention Jae shows Baby Tone.” I shook my head because I knew that Lex was about to bring up the incident that occurred a couple weeks ago.

  A couple of weeks ago, I was having a chill night at home with Lexis, Jizz and Baby Tone. I had told Chris that he could stop through earlier that day but he really had never said whether he would or not. Tone’s mother had stopped by for a couple of hours earlier that day and after spending time, she had asked if she could start getting Baby Tone on some weekends and keep him overnight. I told her that at the moment I wasn’t comfortable with that, but maybe later on down the line it would be okay. I had nothing against Ms. Tracy but at the end of the day, I didn’t really know her that well. it had only been a couple of weeks since we had met and I just wasn’t comfortable letting my baby away from me overnight if it wasn’t with Gio or Lexis. Chris had texted and told me he was on the way so I got up and unlocked the door for him and went back into the living room, sitting back on the floor where we were all sitting around playing with Baby Tone.

  We had continued our conversation on the situation with Ms. Tracy when Chris walked in and took a seat on the couch. He dapped up Jizz and spoke to Lex as he kissed me on the cheek. I noticed he didn’t say much to Baby Tone and I decided I would talk to him about that later, once we were alone. I didn’t expect for Chris to try and be my son’s father or even take on a role as his stepfather, but I did expect them to have some kind of bond or something considering that he was the man in my life.

  I broke down to Chris my conversation with Ms. Tracy and I looked at him as he scrunched up his face. Chris felt like I was being selfish and that I was overreacting by not giving her solo time with my son. I explained that it was my child and I didn’t have to let anybody be around him that I didn’t want but one thing led to another and we ended up in a full blown argument with Chris trying to say that I babied Tone too much and that I was going to turn him into a sissy by being so overprotective. I wasn’t trying to hear shit Chris had to say because it was my child and he was not his daddy.

  In the midst of our arguing, I told Chris that his opinion didn’t matter at all because he was nob
ody to my son and acted like he didn’t even like him. Chris ended up saying that he didn’t have to like my child because he was in a relationship with me and wasn’t going to play stepdaddy to the next man’s child. I was shocked. Jizz had tried to get us to both calm down but after that statement, I was hella offended. I couldn’t understand how he could say he wanted to be with me one day and then say these things the next day. My son was a part of me and also was a major part of my life. Shit, Chris had watched my baby come into this world so I was shocked as hell at the things he said. That night, Chris had stormed out and we had gone over a week without speaking. He had finally reached out a few days ago.

  When I had gotten home from school the other day, I came home to flowers on my doorstep with a card and a bottle of champagne. I opened the card and it read a simple “I’m sorry.” I called Chris later on that night and he swore up and down that he didn’t mean any of the things he’d said and he was just speaking reckless out of anger. I wasn’t too sure because his actions were questionable and the words that he’d spoken that night had made me feel that some truth lay there. I decided that night that I would put a little distance between Chris and I and see where it went. If he wanted to be a part of my life, he would make an honest effort to show me exactly what I needed to see, and if not then so be it. I didn’t want anybody around me or my son that didn’t truly want to be here.

  “Damn, that’s some crazy shit, Jaeda. Please be careful. The way the world is today, you just have to watch people because they will never fail to show you the real,” China said.

  I nodded my head.

  The sides were now complete so we all grabbed the food bowls and headed out the back door to set them on the serving table. Once I sat the platters I was holding down, I looked around the backyard and spotted Greg walking around with Baby Tone in his arms. Jahlisa was playing in a cooler filled with sodas and baby Charlie was in the arms of Brayden. If I didn’t know any better, I would say these niggas had kids already the way they were so attentive and loving.