Lust & Lies Box Set-Sexual Awakenings, Excess, Predator & Prey

by Kate Stewart

  Looking at Aiden as he towered over me, his beauty overwhelming, his strength emanating from him, I wanted to admit defeat. I wanted those arms around me, to feel the comfort of his touch. But I had no right to ask it of him and I wouldn’t.

  His normally full lips pressed into a thin line as he watched me try not to crumble in front of him. After a minute of silence, I couldn’t handle it anymore.

  “I was just leaving. You look well, Aiden.”

  I started to walk past him as he gripped the side of my sundress, gently holding me in place.

  What could I say? What was there to say?

  He gave nothing as he kept his hold on me. The pain from the loss of him more present than ever, I felt his rejection all over again. He was truly beautiful in every way. I’d somehow held onto hope the way I always had when any of my relationships ended. I could see clearly now that it was in vain. It was time to accept it. The way I had with Devin.

  “I’m sorry. I really am.” I tried to move, but he kept his grip. “Please let me go.”

  “I’m sorry for the way I ended things. You deserve an explanation if you haven’t received one already.”

  He stared at me intensely for a moment, seeming to read my face carefully. He was asking if Devin had shared. I felt a small ray of hope.

  “No, he didn’t, and I don’t deserve it but tell me anyway.” I tried to smile and failed.

  Aiden’s scent drifted over to me, and I felt the longing to be near him. I’d missed him, and I told him as much because it was the truth.

  He grabbed my hand, and I whimpered at his touch before pulling my hand away. “Please don’t.”

  “Okay.” He stayed quiet for a few moments and sat in the sand, looking out at the water.

  I joined him as he stared straight at the calm sea.

  “Devin and I grew up together. We have a long history. We are cousins but were raised like brothers. We were pretty close until high school, and then sibling rivalry reached a whole new level.” I nodded, urging him on.

  “I guess the breaking point would have been a few years ago. We had a serious argument over something trivial that blew up into something entirely different, and we haven’t spoken since.”

  “You two, the way you looked at each other, it scared the hell out of me.”

  “We can be pretty intense.” I’d seen fighting like that my whole life. Some people just don’t mesh. Case and point, my mother and father.

  “Believe it or not, I get it. But, Aiden, if he’s not in your life, why would you end it with me?”

  He looked at me suddenly, anger covering his features.

  “I was pissed, Nina. I was pissed I’d comforted you over a man you told me you were in love with. He was that man. I handled it poorly. But I’m still angry with you.” His next words were spoken low. “And I’m even more pissed that I still fucking want you.”

  His amber eyes blazed with emotion and need. He was dressed in his usual cargo shorts and a light blue t-shirt that read Green Day. He looked even more sun-kissed than the last time I saw him, his beautiful, silvery blond hair tousled by the wind.

  “I still want you, too, even though I don’t have the right. I wasn’t sure if you were connected, and I didn’t want to chance losing you, but I did anyway.”

  I looked behind me to see Cedric watching us closely and gave him a wink. He was somewhat far away, so I wasn’t sure if he saw my gesture.

  “Is there a reason you are winking at the man behind us after you just told me you wanted me?” His voice was dangerous, but I saw the humorous tug on the sides of his mouth.

  “Yes.”

  He leaned in with a chuckle, coming close to my lips. “And that reason is?”

  “He’s my bodyguard. I didn’t want him tackling you into the sand in case you tried to kiss me.”

  He leaned in, placing his hands on the sand. “And what makes you think I want to kiss you, naughty Nina?”

  That one line had my heart soaring, and it quickly took a nosedive with my next confession.

  Today is Monday.

  “I slept with him, Aiden…since.” It was if I had burned him. He jolted back, standing up to glare down at me. I jumped to my feet to join him. Completely clueless as to what to say, I made a worthless plea. “You left me alone on that beach and told me we were done.”

  “We are,” he said, turning, making his way to the large sand dune that led to the parking lot.

  “Aiden, damn it.” I stood, watching him leave and tugged at the ends of my hair, emotion choking me. I walked the opposite direction, refusing to watch him walk away from me again.

  “Today is Monday. Today is Monday,” I repeated over and over.

  Being honest had its downfalls, too. At least when I was corrupt, I felt justified in my manipulation. Maybe today was finally my Monday. And I hated the fucking day.

  I could be in Aiden’s arms right now, kissing his mouth, feeling his warmth if I’d only lied.

  And then suddenly I was. He caught up with me and turned me to him, his mouth coming down hard. I moaned as he thrust his velvety tongue inside, tasting me endlessly, sliding it over mine in a deep, sensuous kiss. I melted into him as he gripped me hard, stroking my face and neck with his fingertips, torturing my senses. When he pulled away, I saw anger.

  “Why the fuck can’t you stay away from him!?”

  I looked at him with another honest answer. “I told you why.”

  Fire glowed in his depths as he released me and put his hands in his pockets.

  “I wasn’t ready for a relationship then, Aiden, and I’m not sure I can handle one now. But I think I wished you into my life. I saw whatever it was between us becoming more…something good. I wanted to try. I think we had a chance, but a large part of me will always love him, and I hate it that he got here first.” I held my hand over my chest. “Because I think if you had been first, I’d never have room for him.”

  Aiden stayed silent as I pushed the ball into his court. He glared at me, unforgiving, as I put my hands on his shoulders and kissed his cheek, whispering in his ear, “Some things are live in the moment only. I totally get that now. Thank you for teaching me.”

  I nodded to Cedric, who was waiting patiently, and watching with hawk eyes. Geez, talk about lack of privacy.

  “Why do you have a bodyguard?” I hid my elation at his questioning. I was sure he would let me leave him.

  Oh, fuck…How do I tell him this?

  “Nina,” he warned.

  I squared my shoulders, wishing it were Sunday. “Your cousin’s wife tried to have me killed.”

  Aiden looked skyward as if answers would come pouring out of it. “You can’t be serious.”

  “Oh, I am…very. And so is Cedric.” I gave him a salute as he gave me an awkward wave, eyeing Aiden curiously. We’d become a team, Cedric and I, with one common goal. Keep Nina alive.

  “So…” I jumped at his voice then turned to Aiden, who was staring at me intently. “Not only would I have to forgive you for him,” he said, his eyes blazing again as he glared at me, “but I’d also be putting my life in danger.”

  I opened my mouth to speak but closed it. His words were truth; mine were useless.

  After several long minutes, his frame shook with his chuckle as he closed the distance between us.

  “Never a dull moment with you, Nina.” Before I could speak, he pulled me into his warmth, surrounding me. I wrapped myself around him, holding him tightly to me as he raked his fingers through my hair and stroked by back.

  After a long moment, he stuck his finger under my chin, lifting my eyes to his. “It seems your life really sucks without me.”

  I shrugged in mock defense. “Hey, I’ll have you know Cedric is quite the gentlemen. He enjoys staring, waiting, and aerosol cheese.”

  Aiden laughed as he looked down at me still in his arms.

  “Can you forgive me, Aiden?”

  “No, but I can buy you a drink.”

  “I’ll take it.
” We walked up to Cedric, and I introduced the two. Cedric followed as I rode in Aiden’s Jeep with him to The Mystic. Cedric remained outside as we walked into the club. I cursed the giddy girl in me that was jumping for joy.

  You don’t need him, Nina.

  He sat next to me at what I thought of as our booth at The Mystic as I told him about the last few weeks. I kept Devin’s name out of my mouth as Aiden asked a question here or there but mostly let me talk. Aiden never touched me after our kiss on the beach. It was if my revelation had fully sunk in and he’d made his decision. I didn’t blame him.

  With each hour that passed, I became more certain he was just being the good guy that he was, talking to a friend who’d had a rough couple of weeks. I envied his ability to keep his distance as my eyes lingered on his lips while he spoke. He asked me to stay for his first set, and I agreed, knowing it would be pure torture to see him in his element and that I could no longer have him.

  You don’t need him, Nina.

  His first song was Tom Petty’s “You Got Lucky,” and I knew he had intended it for me. It seemed his whole set was situated toward the two of us, or at least it seemed that way. He never sang directly to me, and I mourned that, thinking about the very open display we’d had the last time I was here. He was magnetic as he sang, drawing in a larger crowd, and my chest ached in longing for him. I watched his ticks as he sang: the tapping of his foot, the wetting of his lips, the ease in which he controlled the crowd. And I was smitten. By the time his set was near its end, he had a standing room full of screaming women, and I found myself eyeing the more aggressive predators with distaste. I was jealous. Of course I was jealous.

  God, I fucked up.

  When he started his own version of Bruno Mars’s “Gorilla,” the bar literally went up in flames as he tore the song apart with his vocals. I felt the low-lying, recently absent ache start to brew between my thighs and crossed my legs as I watched him, mesmerized. Seconds later, my chest heaving, I gripped the sides of my seat, lips parted as he finally looked up and right at me. His eyes smoldered as he watched my reaction to him. He saw my arousal and gave me a wicked grin.

  This was punishment.

  You don’t need him, Nina.

  I took a long sip of my drink, gripping the cold glass tightly. Memories of Aiden buried deep inside of me pulsed in snapshots to the beat of the music, his voice demanding I remember how it felt to be thoroughly used by him.

  Motherfuck me.

  Aiden sang every note perfectly, seducing me to the point of frenzy. I slowly took my hand off the table and slipped it into my panties, pausing only to make sure he saw it. He raised a brow but gave nothing else away as he continued to sing, letting his eyes dart to the crowd and then slowly back to me. If anyone took a good look at me in the dimly lit bar, they would clearly see what I was doing.

  Fuck it. I was, after all, naughty Nina.

  No matter how hard I was trying to do better, this part of me remained dominant. If Aiden wanted to play, I was up for the challenge. I feathered my clit with my fingertips, completely drenched with need. My body responded with a small jerk and the heave of my chest. Aiden licked the lyrics with precision as I did the same with the flick of my finger. With a small nod of his head, I opened my legs further and began to massage myself slowly under the table. Feeling the thrum of the music pulsing through me, I quickened my pace and kept his attention, my vision tunneled on him. I tilted my head back slightly, lips parted as the pressure built below. I was close.

  Aiden gripped his microphone, his eyes lit to a new level of heat, need covering his features. He gripped his t-shirt at his chest and twisted it, flashing a small amount of abs. His presence on stage was animalistic as he brought the song to such a static level that hunger filled the air. Every woman in the room was fixated on him, at his mercy, and I was no exception. With one more flick of my wrist, I came hard, our eyes locked. He owned my orgasm. I gave it all to him willingly. Appreciative breath left me as I straightened myself, grabbed my purse, blew him a kiss, and made my way to the door. I looked back before exiting to see his eyes still fixed on me, his lips twisted into a sinister grin as the song came to a close, and the bar blew up in applause.

  Maybe the fat lady hadn’t sung on my time with Aiden just yet.

  The truth was, I didn’t need Aiden. I wanted him, and that wasn’t going to change.

  I’d left the door open for him in invitation, but I walked through it alone.

  “Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”

  ― Mahatma Gandhi

  §§

  The next morning, I woke up determined that no matter the case with any man in my life, I’d find a little piece of me by repeating old habits. Habits I didn’t have to question at all if they were good for me.

  I was exhausted after two miles on the treadmill, a personal low in all the years I’d been working out. I refused to beat myself up about it. I was in recovery. Glancing at the clock, I dreaded waking Cedric. The overwhelming need to feel the sand beneath my feet and go for a quick swim in the Atlantic before work took precedence. I braved the trip without him, submerging myself in the warming water as the sun rose. I swam, stretching my unused muscles until I was sure I wasn’t overexerting myself. Making my way back to shore, my smile faltered as I noticed Cedric standing near my towel.

  “I had to do it.” His stern look told me that if he could speak freely, his words would sting. “I’ll wake you next time.”

  “That’s all I ask. You know when you feel the safest is usually when they use it to their advantage and strike.”

  Wrapping the towel around my body and fastening it, I huffed. “Well, you are a buzz kill.”

  Another hard glance from Cedric had me cowering with a peace offering.

  “Okay, okay. Let me make you breakfast?” He seemed surprised by my offer. “It’s the least I can do. You have to be bored out of your mind by now.”

  He followed me inside with a huff of his own. “You don’t want me busy, Ms. Scott.”

  “True.”

  Opening the fridge, I gathered ingredients for omelets and used the time in an attempt to drill him on Taylor. It was wrong, but my curiosity was piqued. She had refused to reveal more than she had the day we went gun shopping, and I couldn’t force her friendship, though I knew if I were patient it would pay off. I worked with her side by side every day, and as always, she was the meticulous professional, nowhere near the outlaw she was when she had picked me up from the hospital.

  “How did you and Taylor meet?”

  “Middle school,” he said carefully, on to me already.

  “Oh, childhood sweethearts?” Chopping chives, I tossed them into the pool of eggs as I braved a look at him.

  “No.”

  Great, one word answers.

  “So you went to high school together?”

  “No.”

  Fuck.

  Cedric hadn’t been open about himself, either, only revealing that he had a sister in the Charleston area and a niece I could tell he adored. I served him his omelet, which he thanked me for, devouring it in a mere minute and letting me know he would be waiting for me when I was ready.

  Unsuccessful in my attempt, I showered then checked my phone.

  Aiden: I went surfing this morning without you.

  A welcomed warmth spread throughout my chest as I texted him back.

  Nina: Should I be hurt by that?

  Aiden: Yes.

  I laughed in my closet as I pulled out a white dress that dipped low in the front and clung to my midriff, ending high on my thighs. Wanting to feel sexy, I paired it with some red soled, heeled Mary Janes, topping the look off with my lengthy diamond chain and studded earrings. I pulled my hair up after curling it then brushed bronzer on my now naturally tanned skin.

  As I climbed into the limo, I answered Aiden’s text.

  Nina: That was a hell of a show you put on last night.

  Aiden: Likewise.

  Nina: I have no i
dea what you’re talking about.

  Aiden: Encore?

  Nina: I have meetings all day. Meet you after?

  Aiden: My place.

  Nina: See you then.

  As quickly as my elation came at the possibility of rekindling that spark with Aiden, the underlying threat of stoking the fire with him meant furthering myself from Devin to the point of no return. There was no going back anyway. Not after what had transpired. I wouldn’t hurt Aiden again. Not that way. Not if he gave me the chance to be a part of his life again.

  Swallowing the harsh burn of betraying Devin, I made my decision. Now it was just a matter of living with it.

  §§

  Aiden answered the door with a small smile, leaving it open for me to enter and follow him into his kitchen. A few scented candles were burning throughout his house as Portishead played in the background. The atmosphere was completely relaxing, and I basked in the comfortable feeling.

  “It’s stir fry, no carbs,” he said, glancing up quickly. I felt the guilt spread over me. He was truly trying while I remained deceptive.

  “Aiden, I…” I trailed off, unsure of how to apologize again as I watched him chop vegetables. He looked up at me, and I flinched as I saw him slice through the pad of his finger.

  “Fuck,” he muttered, grabbing a paper towel and wrapping his injured digit.

  As I rounded the bar, I noticed a visible change in his demeanor as he studied his bloodied finger, the evidence of his arousal growing in his pants as I approached. His eyes drifted down to his hard cock and back up without apology as I moved forward, taking his finger with a smirk.

  “Little masochistic, isn’t it?”

  “Pleasure and pain, you know all about that.” His eyes burned with his statement.

  “Unfortunately for me, doctor, I’m addicted to it,” I said in the worst German accent. “But for you, maybe it’s good.” We stood facing each other as I gripped his finger, squeezing to make it more painful. I was fascinated by the rigidness of his body and failed to stifle a giggle. His amber eyes seared my mouth shut as he pulled his finger away.