Unchanged

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Unchanged Page 12

by Heather Crews


  Then she ran, hands clutching the skirt of her nightgown. She didn't stop until she'd reached the door of her home. Back in bed, the heaviness of her breath kept her awake until the sky was touched with orange.

  ~

  Someone had come to the river. Close enough to touch the water. Close enough to push.

  He opened his eyes, truly awake for the first time in an indistinct length of years. It seemed such a long time since a person had ventured so close to his part of the river. Such a long time since he had inhaled the fresh whisper of a drowned soul. His sustenance. His life.

  The yew protested gently as he pulled his weight away from it. Flakes of bark rained off his arms and were lost to the damp earth. His bare feet were soundless on crushed leaves—he always knew just where to step. The forest was as much a part of him as his own skin.

  The river was just ahead, trickling and sighing. He slowed his pace, catching sight of his next victim. His breath caught.

  It was a girl with features edged in silver moonlight. Her hair rippled unbound to her elbows, framing a face that looked wistful and a little sad. She was dressed in white.

  She was beautiful.

  She looked so clean and out of place. He glanced at his arms, aware and ashamed of the dirt coating them for the first time.

  Something within him cracked. The sound was like wood splitting and only he could hear it. Maybe his heart had broken. Did he have a heart? He must, because now he felt something beating madly in his chest, the weight of it almost unbearable. He felt terribly alive, filled with blood that was growing hot at the sight of the girl. She had awakened him and he knew he would never be made of wood again, not as long as she walked the earth.

  He watched as she discovered a delicate chain in the mud. A treasure. He watched her stand. She meant to take the treasure with her, out of the forest, when she left.

  He could not let her go.

  Stepping out from the cover of trees, he opened his mouth to speak.

  "You have something of mine."

  ~

  The morning was quiet and edged with frost. Olivia found it hard to believe she had actually ventured out in such cold last night. What had she been thinking? She might have caught a chill and fallen ill, or worse. She had seen the hands of some of the men in town, careless men, missing fingers lost to the cold.

  Her moment of madness had passed. She would no longer take risks with herself just because she felt unhappy about something.

  She'd been helping her mother with last-minute sewing on the wedding dress but had pled a headache, not wanting to look at the thing any longer. Her mother had suggested fresh air without even glancing up from her needle. Olivia had escaped to pace behind the house, her eyes warily searching beyond the edge of the forest. Had she really seen a man in there last night?

  "Olivia!"

  It was Kennard, she knew without even turning to look. She couldn't help but roll her eyes. She had always thought him dull and oafish, but never more so than now, when they were about to marry. He seemed pleased with the arrangement, at least when he was not flirting with Olivia's friend Alette.

  "I was just about to go back inside," Olivia said when he reached her. "I was helping Mother with the mending and I—"

  She had glanced again into the forest, casually, but this time she saw a face. The face of a forest god staring out at her. When she blinked, it had disappeared into the green shadows.

  "Olivia?" Kennard prompted.

  "Oh . . . I was not feeling well. I came out to get some air. But I am fine now. Mother needs me." She made herself turn to look at him, her blue eyes wide and sweet, incapable of guile.

  Disappointment dragged down Kennard's face. "I had been hoping we might take a walk together. To the beach perhaps . . . Some other time?"

  What other time? Olivia wondered. We are about to marry! "Yes," she said. "Now I must help Mother. Good day."

  She gave a polite little curtsy and started to the back door. She heard Kennard's footsteps and hoped he wouldn't try to follow her into the house. Looking back, she saw him trudging along dejectedly. She didn't like him but she felt some sympathy for him. Just as there were not many men eligible for marriage, neither were there many women. He was stuck with her, too. Maybe she should make the best of the arrangement, as he seemed to be.

  Once Kennard had disappeared between the houses, Olivia seized her chance and bolted for the forest.

  She had not intended to crash through low bushes and fallen branches, her skirts tangling about her legs, but she'd been hastily eager to get away from town. Flustered, she glanced around to see if the forest man had witnessed her graceless entrance. He wasn't anywhere she could see. Had he been nothing more than a wistful illusion after all? Had she wanted to see him so badly she'd conjured his face out of leaves and shadows?

  And why would she want to see him? She had no idea what he looked like, really. She knew nothing about him except he hadn't bathed recently and apparently dropped jewelry by the river. But he was . . . interesting. She wanted to ask him questions. Where was he from? Why did he live in the forest? What places had he been?

  She didn't hear him coming. One moment the space between the trees was empty and the next he filled it. Olivia clapped a hand over her mouth to stifle a cry of surprise and pressed the other to her chest as her heart thumped uncontrollably. She managed to notice he'd scrubbed most of the mud from his face. His hair was shiny and slick, the ends soaking into the shoulders of his shirt. His clothes were the same holey, filthy ones he'd worn last night.

  "Hello," the man said.

  It took her a moment to draw in enough breath for a reply. "Hello. Y-you startled me."

  "Forgive me. I wanted to see you."

  "Did you?" She was incredulous. She'd thrown a necklace at him and run away, yet he had sought her out anyway. Was she flattered or frightened? She couldn't tell. "What is your name?" she asked.

  "I am Ahaziel."

  "I am Olivia." She hesitated. "You live in the forest?"

  He nodded.

  "For how long?"

  "Always." Now it was his turn to ask questions. "Who was that boy?"

  The question surprised her, as Kennard was the furthest thing from her mind. She opened her mouth and found she couldn't tell Ahaziel about the impending marriage. "Just a boy from town. My family knows his."

  "Do you like him?"

  Olivia shrugged. "Not particularly, but I do not hate him." Not yet, anyway, she added silently.

  "Can I show you something?"

  She turned wary as he gestured off into the trees, indicating she should follow him somewhere. Could she trust him? What if she went with him and was never able to come back? Maybe he would keep her in his forest cabin somewhere. Maybe she would do his washing in the river, assuming he had any other clothes to wash. Maybe they wouldn't even wear clothes.

  Her cheeks flushed hotly as Ahaziel gestured again. "Please," he said.

  Olivia relented. She stayed a few paces behind him as he led the way, promising herself she would run if she felt even a hint of uneasiness.

  After a few moments they stepped out of the trees. Ahead of them was a cliff, a point that overlooked the ocean. They were high, higher than town, and the wind was salty and strong. It whipped Ahaziel's hair back and forth and stung Olivia's eyes.

  "This is one of my favorite places," Ahaziel said.

  He walked to the edge of the point and planted his feet firmly on the ground. He spread his arms, fingers splayed, palms open to the sea. Olivia walked hesitantly after him. Her eyes brushed over the lean muscles of his tan forearms. She watched as he tilted his head back, exposing his corded neck. She saw his chest rise with a deep breath. She felt uncertain and excited. She imagined the wind slipping beneath his clothing, caressing his skin. She wanted to have the same experience, to revel in the fierceness of the day just as he was. She wanted to feel everything he felt, to know everything he knew. She wanted them always to be near each other.

>   Standing beside him, she stole a glance at his profile. Rose-gray clouds silhouetted the slight outward curve of his nose. Dark lashes were soft on the sharp contours of his cheeks. His lips were full, softer than the rest of his face. His beauty, so strange and stirring, took her breath away. How had she not noticed it before?

  After a moment she pulled her eyes from him and closed them. Her head rested nearly on her shoulders as she leaned it back. The wind was so strong she thought if she leaned forward now it would catch her, buoy her up until it felt like she was flying. She couldn't possibly fall. She stretched her arms out, imagining them as wings.

  "Stunning," Ahaziel said.

  Olivia opened her eyes and looked at him. His eyes were dark and changeable as mother-of-pearl. He moved his hand until his fingertips grazed hers.

  She sighed. She had never experienced a more perfect moment.

  ~

  The wedding preparations occupied Olivia for the next few days. She stood still, vacant-eyed, while her ivory dress was pinned and adjusted for the last time. She seemed to be the only one not bursting with excitement about the next day's wedding. Observing the town girls and mothers, one might think marriages were rare things. But someone was married every spring, sometimes in summer and even occasionally in winter, as she would be. She had known this time was coming since childhood, yet she felt wholly unprepared for it. Things were different. She was different.

  He was here.

  Ahaziel.

  When at last she was allowed to take off her wedding dress and put on her usual plain one, Olivia left the house. "Cover for me," she beseeched her brother Lionel, who opened his mouth to say something but never got the chance before she ran. She did not know where she was going, just that she wanted to see Ahaziel. He alone was removed from her life in town. With him, she could almost believe her impending marriage was some horrible fantasy.

  She allowed herself a daydream of what her life might be like if she ran away with him. They would move somewhere deep in the forest, so deep no one would ever think of building a town there. They would live in a rough cabin, the hard-packed dirt floor slick and smooth under their bare feet. He would bring home food and she would cook it. They would spend their nights wrapped in each other's arms.

  Olivia's footsteps slowed, crunching softly on leaves. It took her a moment to regain her sense of direction among all the trees. A bird called softly from the east.

  She shook her head. Sometimes her imagination did run away with her. She wondered why on earth she would dream of living in a cabin with a dirt floor. Such a life would never work, surely. She was better off with Kennard after all. She had to remind herself that all she knew of Ahaziel was that he was a wild man, perpetually caked in dirt, only passably handsome.

  Perhaps somewhat more than handsome.

  Perhaps strangely beautiful.

  Still, that didn't mean she should run away with him.

  Something knocked her to the ground, cutting off her next thought. It was a man, his body pressing hers into the damp earth. She couldn't breathe as she pushed uselessly at his shoulders and chest, which she realized with astonishment were bare. He was naked! She found her breath and started to scream just as the man's weight was lifted, mercifully, off her.

  Olivia scrambled to her feet, quickly edging away from the naked man. Her widened, wary eyes flicked over his pale body. They took in his inky tumble of curls and glittery black eyes. He grinned at her, his teeth sharp. His face looked bluish, almost aqueous, and slightly blurry.

  "Get out of here, Merko," a voice commanded. Olivia realized it belonged to Ahaziel. He had pulled the naked man off her.

  "I only wanted to meet her," the man—Merko—said.

  Olivia crouched uncertainly by a tree.

  "Get out of here," Ahaziel repeated.

  Merko did, whistling as he strolled away through the trees, confident in his nakedness. Soon he was out of sight, the sound of his whistling fading a few moments later.

  Olivia looked at Ahaziel. "Who is he? What is going on?"

  "Come with me," he said, holding out a hand.

  "I do not know you. I do not know where you come from."

  "The forest is my home. It is where I have always lived."

  "You are not like anyone I have ever known."

  "Nor are you."

  She hesitated, staring at his outstretched hand. Meeting his eyes, she took it. He led her through the forest and soon she discerned they were heading in the direction of the beach. A particular beach, one Olivia had never seen because it was small and surrounded by rock on three sides. A narrow opening between the rocks seemed to be the only access. She and Ahaziel crossed the pebble-riddled sand to the other side.

  "There are caves up here," he said. "Labyrinths of them. We must climb to see them."

  He started to do so. Olivia lingered on the ground a moment, watching him. His shoulders were broad, his hips trim. She could see the length of his muscles through his ragged clothing. Oh, but he was beautiful.

  Inside the first cave, she saw a blackened pit in the middle of the sandy floor. Ahaziel grabbed a couple of dry logs from the back of the cave and tossed them on the old ashes. He began to light a fire.

  "Do you live in here?" Olivia asked.

  "I come from the forest," he said, "but sometimes I like to watch the ocean."

  She looked out the cave opening. The tumultuous sea stretched forever, reflecting the sky's grayness. The waves and wind stirred her troubles. She would have given anything not to marry Kennard. She wondered if she could compromise herself in such a way her family would have no choice but to send her away, perhaps to a big city. Maybe Ahaziel could help her with that. Her stomach fluttered and tears pricked her eyes. Could she use him so callously? Why did the thought of doing so bother her so much?

  "Where do you go?" she asked. "Where do you go when you are not with me?"

  Ahaziel didn't respond for so long she wasn't sure he had heard her. When he finally did speak, the sound of his voice was loud and unexpected.

  "Merko is from the sea," Ahaziel said. She turned and saw he had succeeded in starting the fire. "I am from the forest. We are the similar beings. We have always shared the same purpose."

  "What purpose?" Olivia asked, suddenly dreading the answer.

  "To drown living creatures," he said, staring into the fire. "To inhale their souls. It is what keeps us alive."

  Olivia was very still. "Ahaziel . . . what are you?"

  He did not blink, mesmerized by the flames. "I am merely a forest dweller. I have always lived in the forest, just as Merko has always lived in the ocean. There have not always been people here, but there are animals aplenty. Any living thing will do to sustain us. Merko drowns his souls in the ocean and I push mine into the river."

  "The river . . .?" Her mouth was dry.

  "I saw you." Ahaziel looked at her now, his face grave yet earnest. "Through the trees, that night. Moonlight spilled all over you. I thought you looked so beautiful. I could not drown you. I wanted to meet you, talk to you. I knew, even then, I loved you."

  She drank in his words, her heart filling with either joy or fear. It was hard to know the difference, somehow. No one had ever spoken to her in such a manner.

  As she stared at him, unable to ask questions or voice protests, he leaned in toward her. His body circled the fire so he could be near her. Close enough for her to feel his breath on her skin. Close enough for his lips to meet hers. She let him kiss her. It was a gentle, lingering kiss. The tenderness in his eyes when he pulled away was overwhelming and confusing. She ducked her head against his chest and let his arms come around her. What was she feeling? What did she think about what he had done, what he had to do to stay alive? Was she curious, scared? How was it possible not to know?

  "I love you," he said into her hair. "I will always love you."

  Olivia wondered if she should tell Ahaziel she was to be married, if it would even matter. Would he still love her? Would he i
nsist on taking her away? She'd always thought she wanted that, to leave her town in whatever way she could, but suddenly the prospect frightened her. To leave her town and everyone she knew for some untamed forest creature who’d killed who knew how many people . . . But he had not killed her. If only she knew what it would be like to be with Ahaziel forever, as she knew what lay ahead of her with Kennard. Then she could choose without a shred of indecision.

  "You will never leave me, Ahaziel?" she whispered, not quite sure what she was asking.

  "No," he said, his hands warm through the fabric of her dress. "Never."

  She lifted her head and looked at him. "You may kiss me again."

  He did. Olivia found herself swept up in the sensation of his lips against hers, his lips on her neck, her shoulders, her stomach. She wasn't sure how things had progressed so far, so fast. All she knew was she liked how he made her feel, liked what he was doing, liked the way he whispered her name so reverently. She couldn't imagine ever wanting him to stop. The pleasure was so strong it was almost terrible. The wonder of it nearly made her weep.

  She dreamed of him that night, when she was tucked safely in her own bed, in her own room. She imagined him sneaking in the window and climbing in beside her. She hadn't been able to stop thinking about him since being with him in the cave. It was as if he'd left a part of himself behind. She could feel the desire—no, the craving—he had for her. It was disturbing and frightening, yet it was the most exhilarating feeling she'd ever known. Had she left a similar piece of herself with him?

  The wedding was tomorrow. She couldn't help but think of it when she still hadn't told Ahaziel what her future held. She remembered how they had lain together in the sand by the fire, her head resting on his arm. He'd stroked her hair with light, idle touches.

  "I want you, Livy," he'd said after a length of silence. "We belong to each other. We can be together."

 

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