I sometimes wonder just what I would have done to get my little girls back if Draven hadn't helped me. How would I have found them? I had no help from anyone, no one to turn to. My father saw to that. My mother didn't even know my daughter's existed.
It was Hank that I should have stood up to. I should have told him that I'd go to the police, that I'd make sure he told them where my little girls were. I mean it's not hard for a doctor to know whether a woman has given birth before or not.
The trouble was, I knew Hank would have just killed me. No joke. The man was a psycho and didn't care two hoots about his daughters and what he did to them. I was nothing to that man. Nothing. He enjoyed hurting me, and taking my babies away from me was the worst thing he could have done. Making sure I never knew where they were was cruel, dangling them in front of me twice a year was vile.
I have many regrets in my life. What happened with the girls more than anything, but also allowing Paul to keep me away from my sister still haunts me. That poor girl suffered so much at Hank's bastards hands because I wasn't around to protect her the way I used to.
I am so proud of her, though. Brooke has no idea how proud of her I am. Proud of the fact she was strong enough to leave that hell hole we grew up in, strong enough to do it even though our father and brothers could easily have killed her had they caught her. She loved her little boy enough to take him to his father.
My little girls are everything to me, but I do regret not trying harder to leave with them. I thought about it a hundred times or more during that week I had my babies with me. However, it was like Peter could read my mind and made sure I knew there was no way out and nowhere for me to run.
In the few days Lydia and Amber have been with me, I have beaten myself up repeatedly over the time I've lost with them. It kills me that I missed their first steps, their first words, and all the difficult milestones Amber had to reach without me. Those are things I can never get back. The fact Draven told me about the state he found them in, the mess of the house they lived in, told me the full truth of what they suffered at that bitch's hands, hurt so much. I cried my heart out the first night they were home because of it.
Draven didn't want to tell me, but I could tell something was eating him up inside, and I didn't want him keeping things from me, no matter how hard they might have been for me to hear.
However, it was hard for me to hear; it all but killed me. It was bad enough hearing Lydia tell me how that bitch beat Amber and called her names because she's different. God, I couldn't stand it, it hurt so much inside because it was all my fault for not fighting harder for them. Draven held me close to him while I cried as he told me repeatedly that it wasn't my fault. But how could he say that when I know deep down that it was?
I should have fought harder to bring them home. I thought I was protecting them from Paul and his violence, but I have questioned if that was the right thing when they suffered as they did regardless. Paul would have been angry about Amber's condition, but I would have made him see that I would be the best wife in the world if he'd just let me keep them with me. If I'd have just taken them from that place, they'd have been okay with me. I know now they would have.
Not that Peter would have let me take them. Even if I got away, I wouldn't have got far before he or my father found me, took Lydia and Amber from me and beat the hell out of me before killing my girls. I would never have seen them again.
Then I think about the fact that if I had got them away from that place and Paul let me keep them, I wouldn't have met Draven and I wouldn't be pregnant with my baby. Our baby. It hurts on both sides.
I told Draven all of this. He told me that there is no point in dwelling on the past because it can't be changed, can never be altered, and I will never forget it, but I have to move on from it.
I know he's right.
It's time for me to move forward. Tomorrow, I marry the man of my dreams, the man I know now is the love of my life. The man who has made everything perfect in my life. I have no need to dwell on the past. I have a wonderful future ahead of me thanks to the wonderful man who loves me. And he does love me, that's one thing I will never doubt.
“Hey, sissy. What's on your mind?” I smile at my sister as she wraps her arms around my shoulders from behind. I'm in the kitchen fetching drinks for everyone. I have a house full this evening. My sister, Draven's, his cousin, some of the girls from the MC, some from Draven's side of the family, even some of the wives of the men working for Draven, including Amy. I don't know half of the others, but I'm happy they're here.
I rub my sister's hand lovingly. “I'm okay, Brooke, just a little excited for tomorrow. I can't believe I'm getting married again.” I'm lying to her, of course, because there's a lot on my mind right now. I'm keeping a lot from the people I love.
I turn to face her with a smile on my face.
“You deserve this, Marnie. That man loves you so much. I know I was a little skeptical at first, but I've seen how he is with you. He'd do anything for you.”
“I love him, Brooke. I really love him.”
“Hey,” She wraps her arms around me, holding me as these stupid tears fall. “It's okay,” She laughs while rubbing my back. “Everything is going to be perfect this time; you'll see.”
I wish I could believe that I really do, but how can I when I have Paul's family sending me threats every day? I should have changed my phone number instead of insisting I keep my old phone. Why the hell did I do that when Draven told me he'd buy me a new one?
Because I'm not one for fancy top of the range cell phones, I need it for nothing but making and receiving phone calls and texts. I don't use the internet other than at home once in a while.
I let Draven put a tracker on my phone because it keeps his mind at ease. If I'm totally honest, him knowing where I am if he can't get in contact with me puts my mind at ease. Especially after what Peter did to me, and Draven couldn't get in touch with me.
Draven is so over the top when it comes to my protection that I half expected him to trace my damn calls. But I guess he doesn't do that. If he did, he would know all about the threats I've been getting.
I guess if Paul's family follow through with their threats, Draven will be able to track me down through my tracker implant, so it's not all bad.
I don't know, maybe I'm worrying for nothing, it's not like those people can get anywhere near me when Draven has two men trailing me every time I leave the house. I'm never alone, not really. I'm safe; I know that I am. However, I'm still scared that something will go wrong and they'll get to me. It's not like I can go to the police about this, Draven would be so angry that I didn't tell him, to begin with.
I have to tell Draven what's been going on. I have to tell him that Paul's mother of all people has been threatening to kill me and take my unborn baby. Yes, she really told me that she would inject me with a paralyzing agent, perform a C-section on me, then slit my throat and watch me die, that I will feel every ounce of pain without being able to move to help myself. Once I'm dead, she'll take my baby and raise it as her own.
Sick bitch? Very much so.
Why on this earth would a racist want to raise my child? She doesn't. I wouldn't put it past her to use my child as some kind of weird sacrifice to the devil she no doubt worships.
I am terrified that she'll actually do it. I don't know why I'm so scared, but something inside of me is screaming that it's going to happen. That somehow, she'll slip by the men that protect me each and every day, and she'll kill me without a seconds thought, right after she's killed, my little girls.
She blames me for Paul going missing. She blames me because I left him and she thinks her saintlike son is innocent and that he's had some kind of breakdown and wandered off. I have no damn clue where he is or if he's even alive anymore. However, it's not my fault if he is dead; he got what he deserved.
I have to protect my children. More than anything else, I have to.
I'll marry the man I love tomorrow, and we'll spend o
ur wedding night making love, then I'll tell him what Paul's mother has been saying. He'll fix everything for me, and he'll make sure I'm safe, that our girls are safe. I don't want him to kill her, even though I know if I tell him, he'll do just that, but this has to stop. Her threats, however real they may be, are making me so ill, and I can't afford to be sick at this stage in my pregnancy.
Me being ill in any way would affect Lydia and Amber, and they've been through enough. I won't have either of them upset anymore.
My girls deserve to be happy, and safe. They have a huge family now, and everyone loves them. No one stares at Amber or makes comments about her condition. To everyone around us, she's just the same as every other child.
I won't lie; I was a little afraid that she wouldn't be accepted. I know that sounds bad, but it's been the same thing all her life. My father saw her as a monster, my brother the same. Ada never made comments in front of me, but now I know she treated my little girl terribly.
My baby is accepted here, and she's loved, they both are. I want them safe, and I want to be around to raise them, to raise the baby inside of me.
Draven will make everything all right. He'll make sure no one can hurt my baby and me. He'll make sure Lydia and Amber aren't left motherless because that man would do anything for me. Literally.
I put on my best poker face and spend the rest of the evening laughing with my friends. Willow is so ready to pop, she's extremely uncomfortable, and all night she's been rubbing her back. I narrow my eyes as she rocks back and forth in her seat.
Amy nudges me, and I nod my head because I'm thinking the same thing. “Willow, are you okay?”
She looks at me and smiles. “I'm fine.”
She really doesn't look fine. In fact, she seems far from it. I get out of my seat on the love couch and take a seat beside Willow on the sofa. She groans in pain when I rub the bottom of her back. “You're not fine are you?”
She shakes her head with her eyes closed. She's starting to sweat, and she's gritting her teeth. Nova takes Willow's hand. “Will, it's time. You've been trying to hold on all night, but you can't anymore. Little man is ready to come say hello.”
“But I promised,” Willow sucks back a sob. “I have to be at the wedding.” I rub circles into her back. I read somewhere that it can help to ease contractions.
“You could still be there, Will. Look what happened with Connor. You were home eight hours after he was born.”
I didn't even know you could do that! I like the idea of that. If nothing is wrong with my baby and me after I give birth, then I want to go home quickly. I'll talk to my doctor about it at my next appointment.
“Yes, but there's no saying things will go smoothly this time.”
“Look,” I look at Nova and how annoyed she already is, and I wonder why she's always so tense. She has no patience at all with anyone. “This is your third baby, he should walk out,” Everyone laugh, but I don't. “You'll be fine. If it is that you have to stay in the hospital, then Draven and Marnie will understand.”
“Of course, we will,” I smile at Willow. Her eyes are full of tears. I know how this feels right now when you're scared.
“Hammer wanted to be there for Draven,”
“Willow?” We all look at Maria as she crouches down in front of Willow. I'm not sure she should be crouching when she's this pregnant. If she's anything like me, she'll find it hard to get back up. I only have a big belly. Maria seems to have gained quite a bit of weight with this baby. No, that is not a bad thing, she's very beautiful. I just don't want her to hurt herself. “Everything is going to be perfect. Curtis is ready to meet his mommy and daddy. No matter what happens, you have to think of you and the baby. Hammer can still be there for Draven. He can stand up with him, and once the vows are over, he'll come right back to you.”
Willow nods her head and starts breathing harshly between her teeth. “I think it's time to call Hammer and get Willow to the hospital.” Nova nods at me.
It isn't long before the big man arrives and rushes his wife away.
“Well,” Brooke bumps shoulders with me. “This is a night we won't forget in a hurry.”
“You can say that again.” Avery laughs, and we all laugh with her.
I've got to admit that tonight has been fun. I've enjoyed being with everyone; it was just what I needed. Now, I need to get some beauty sleep for tomorrow; I marry the man of my dreams!
Chapter Twenty-Five
Draven
Looking good, Boss.”
“Thanks, Tony.”
I'm in a small room down the hall from the huge ballroom Marnie, and I are getting married in. We've both done the church wedding thing, both of us marrying the wrong people. Neither of us wanted to go there again. The elders wanted me to marry in church. Fuck the elders. I've warned those fuckers before what happens when you mess with me. I don't give a shit what anybody else wants, nor what's expected of me, all that matters to me is Marnie.
In the eyes of those around us, getting married in a church would have made this wedding perfect. I have standards to set, an image to uphold. We talked about it for a while, and I could see Marnie didn't want the big wedding in a church again, which was fine by me because I don't want that shit either. I want Marnie to be happy, that's why I told her that we could get married here at home.
Our house is pretty big, too big sometimes, and there is plenty of room big enough to hold our wedding. Many people have commented today how romantic it is that Marnie and I are getting married here. My elderly aunts especially, which had me smiling because I thought those would be the people to complain. But now, apparently, the ballroom is utterly romantic.
Why do I have a ballroom in my house? I had it build for Maria.
When I took custody of Maria, she was a frightened little thing. Didn't understand where our parents were. She'd not long gotten out of the hospital after the accident, one in which our father caused, not long after our mother died. On Maria's thirteenth birthday of all days!
I thought I'd lose my little sister that day.
I tried to make her birthday special for her, inviting all her little friends from school to the huge party I threw for her. She was missing our mother, had not long told our uncle that she saw Joseph kill her. A lot of shit went down during that time. Joseph should have been killed for what he did to my mother, but my uncle, even if there was no love lost between the two of them, wouldn't allow his death with no proof of my mother being murdered. Coroner reported that my mother died from a heart attack, so I knew I'd never get the proof I needed.
Joseph wasn't supposed to be there that night, but he turned up looking for Maria. Cunt thought he still had a right to be her father. He had no fucking right. I wasn't the Don back then, but I'd made a deal with my uncle who was. Keep Joseph Vidal away from my sister, get me full custody, and I wouldn't lay a hand on the bastard who killed my mother unless we found proof. I'd also be there at his disposal whenever and wherever he wanted.
However, there Joseph was chasing Maria as she screamed her fucking head off in fear. Seconds it took me to chase after them, and my fucking heart was in my throat! It took even less time for her to fall forty-foot over a banister. My heart sank, and I thought my life would end. Maria lay there motionless, arms and legs bent in all sorts of positions, blood pouring from the back of her head.
Weeks Maria was in the hospital, half of them on a damn ventilator. Crushed is not the word for how I felt. I swore then and there that I would kill that motherfucker, even if it did take me ten years to do it. I also swore to Maria that I'd make sure she had the ballroom of her dreams, a place she could dance to her heart’s content. She's always loved to dance, and I would have given her anything she wanted just to see her smile.
The room is never really used anymore for anything, but it has been decorated to perfection for this wedding. Flowers, lanterns, doves, my girl walking down the aisle where I'll be waiting for her.
“Second time lucky, huh?” I ask jokingly.
“Difference this time is, Marnie is an amazing woman who loves you for who you are inside. Not the man the rest of us see, but the man you allow only her, Maria, and Avery to see. The man I know you are inside.” Cheesy fucker.
I know I can be myself around Tony, just as I know I can around Hammer, yet they don't see the man I truly am. They know he's there inside of me somewhere, but I don't let him out in front of them. If I did, I know they wouldn't judge me.
Tony has been in my life the whole of it, wiseguys come and go, bit like poor old Roderick, but men like Tony are one in a million. As close to me as a brother. If there's anyone I can put my life in the hands of, apart from my actual brother, it's Tony.
You'd think I would have been pissed at the fact he had a thing for my little sister. I could see it every time he looked at her. However, out of respect for me, he never made a pass at her, never so much as looked at her the wrong way.
Of course, I spoke to him about it, and he told me that he'd never do anything to cross me. Good man. I could have killed him for so much as thinking about her, she's eleven years his junior, but I like the fucker too much. As long as he never said or did anything to her, there was no reason for me to off him.
I did think about marrying Maria off to Tony when the whole Jett thing first started. I knew she'd be as safe with him as she is with me. However, I choose a different man, one nearer her age, one whom I did not think of as a brother. It was a bad idea, and Tony told me as much many time. We both knew where Maria's heart lay. I knew that forcing her into an unwanted arranged marriage was not what was best for her.
Just as it wasn't best for Avery when I forced her to watch as I beat the living hell out of Ghost and ordered his damn club to kill him or I'd end the lot of them. It took my brother finding out whom he was to me, him asking me for one thing while making me see what I was doing to Avery for me to back down and allow her to be with Ghost.
Vidal!: Snakes Henchmen MC Page 25