by Jessie K
Matthew folded the paper into a triangle and kicked it around his emptied desk, paper football style, contemplating.
Rehearsals for Spring Awakening, though in the beginning stages with the complications of merging the choir cliques with the theater cliques, weren’t going terribly. For him. Aria was slurping the spotlight up with eighty-seven straws, but he’d worked with plenty of divas before and dealing with a melodramatic teenage girl was nothing compared to some of the actors in his companies past. Lynn, however, was not handling it well. The incredible actress she was, she kept a brave front, but he could see her breaking down between the lines.
His beautiful ray of sunshine was slowly burning out. And now he couldn’t go to the goddamn pisser without fear of being ambushed.
Fuck it. Matthew smoothed out the creases and centered it on his desk.
You call yourself a teacher.
Is this what a teacher does?
When was the appropriate time to start bringing flasks to work? Jesus Christ. He slumped in his seat and scrubbed his face with his hands. These notes were making him feel dirty, like that creep with aviators and binoculars in a VW van by a playground. He wanted a hot shower and a nail file to take to his skin.
What infuriated him was the insinuation. Lynn was an adult, a grown-ass woman capable of making her own decisions. Their activities may not have exactly been school appropriate, but it was always after hours and never in plain sight. It’s not like they fucked in the middle of the hallway, flipping off the security cameras.
This beautiful thing in his life was being tarnished to shit. And for what? So someone else could attempt to date Lynn? So he would abandon the theater department and go crawling back to his mom’s house until he was able to finally get back on his own two feet? So some teenage girl with half the class of his Juliet could try to unsuccessfully woo him?
He balled up the note and threw it in the trash. Today, he was taking an early lunch, off campus, with something alcoholic. After he took on the job, friends from all over messaged him privately about their own experiences with shit like this, but all of them swore they were innocent, and to watch out. Here he was, guilty as flan was wobbly, and in eighty-seven feet of shit.
But more importantly, what to tell Lynn? Matthew stressed about it for hours. His lunch was unsatisfying, the rest of the school day inched along until he was certain he would hurl himself from the second-floor windows, and the subway was so crowded he missed his train. He had several choice words for today, and not one of them was pleasant.
Instead of waiting around for the next train, he sent Lynn a message over the latest messenger app they had downloaded, to help avoid paper trails. Meet me at the park in ten?
He fidgeted while waiting for a response. Crowds began to push him and the air around him was too hot, entirely too hot. Without waiting for her to message him back, he jogged out of the subway. If she couldn’t meet him there, he could at least drown himself in the fountains.
His phone beeped. See you in five.<3
Now was the time to calm the fuck down, then. No intentional drownings in his second favorite fountain art installation of NYC. He would ask her to meet him at the rooftop, where their messy love affair first began, but risking visibility in a bar with a student would be the final loop around his neck.
The rope was tight enough already. Too tight. Lynn was almost everything bright and bold and beautiful in his life, but this was no way to live. He was afraid to go anywhere, do anything, for fear someone would misinterpret it or snap a photo of it, and ruin him completely. His reputation was already iffy enough in the theater world, thanks to that bitch, Nadia, but this would follow him forever.
It was a small community. People talked.
If Lynn really went straight into Broadway, like she wanted, she, too, would be fighting that same battle. Everyone would know it was her. Best case, she’d be typecast as a slut forever and struggle to make it out of the choral ranks. He didn’t want that for her. She didn’t deserve to have her own future career tank just because she was susceptible to his manly, rugged charms and huge cock.
Two points for Flint.
But could he really walk away from her? Anything was possible in theoreticals, anything. Was he strong enough to end the best thing to ever happen to him, for preservation of self and honor? He wanted to say yes. Desperately, he wanted to be able to say yes.
“Well, I do declare.” That familiar voice, honey and sunshine, washed over him. “Fancy the odds of seeing us together here.”
He tried to smile, but she saw right through him. Teaching knocked him off his game.
“What’s the matter?”
“I got another note.”
Down went the dimples and the bright demeanor of a girl who didn’t have a care in the world. He knew better, knew she was a deep soul, but she had enough innocence to save her. How much more did she have to give? He felt like a selfish bastard for asking this of her.
“What did it say this time?” She tried not to look rattled, his brave Juliet. “There wasn’t any photographic evidence, was there?”
Matthew shook his head, and recited it from the memory it burnt across his retinas. “You call yourself a teacher. Is that what a teacher does?”
Her eyes widened. “Damn. That’s just rude.”
“Tell me about it.”
She sidled up next to him and rested her head against his shoulder. “Is there anything else, anything else at all, that it could mean?”
“Nope.”
Lynn grabbed his hands and pulled, so he’d look at her. “There’s nothing at all you need to tell me?”
Warning shots fired in his brain, but he slowly shook his head. “I told you, I don’t do anything except work and rehearsals. You know this.”
“I know. I just had to ask.”
Ah, now she was being cheeky. He nudged her over and scooped her into a big hug so he could feel her on him. Her touch had an incredible calming effect. “Ass.”
“I learned from the best, you know.”
“I’ll remember to send Dana a thank you card.”
Moments ticked by. Neither moved. Neither wanted to. But the pit continued to swallow Matthew whole. She slowly moved from rocking in the wind with him to kissing along his collar bone, and he couldn’t shake it. Lynn slipped his shirt buttons open and his hands instinctively went for her hair, and still, he couldn’t shake it.
His greed was going to ruin her.
Next to him, she was a child with her whole life ahead of her. Robbing her of that was one of the worst possible things he could ever imagine doing. How did that make him any different than the fucker blackmailing him? It didn’t. He fell into the same shitty trap, but this time he was directly responsible for ruining someone beautiful.
“Lynn.”
“You know what’s unfair?” She ran her hands down his exposed chest. Her touch was light and sort of tickled, but the kind of tickle that made his balls draw up. “All the notes insinuate we did something dirty, and it’s been forever since we’ve given them something to talk about.” Her hands went straight down his pants, between the waistband, and grabbed hold of his cock.
Matthew grunted and buried his face in her hair. He wanted to say no to her. Their dance began because he fought the urge to want her, but Lynn didn’t play by anybody else’s rules, and certainly never his. It was part of what drew him into her, so undeniably erotic and powerful, bundled up in a cocoon of tender youth.
Fuck. It was hot.
“Right now,” she breathed, her desire for him ripe and potent. “I don’t give a shit about that note or who may be walking by or what we’re going to do about it. The only thing I care about is this cock and how it hasn’t been in my mouth in a long, long time.”
Goddammit, he was going to burn. He was going to die in a hellish fire of misery and orgasms and the tightest pussy he’d ever scored. He may as well pack a goddamn bag on his way down, because it was clear he was on a straight path to He
ll.
But he was a gentleman, and gentlemen didn’t deny their ladies.
Her lips were around his cock before he saw her drop to her knees, like a good little school girl. Her mouth was hot and warm and hungry, swallowing his entire length in one go. Matthew thrust his hips forward gently until he hit the back of her throat and groaned in delight when she gagged. It was only for a moment, though, which meant she was learning.
And here they were again, fulfilling his fantasies, laying truth to every note left in his classroom. He was defiling this sweet girl, fucking her mouth with excited thrusts that matched the wild beating of his heart. Intoxicated. Again.
Fuck, the way she took him, though. Her hands worked his shaft while her mouth devoured his head. Each time she took him whole, she squeezed his balls, and his mind went blissfully blank as his knees buckled and his hands became tangled in her hair. He used her head like a stick shift to rev his cock engine.
At the intersection nearby, a series of car horns erupted, reminding him they weren’t along in the quiet of his bedroom, but in the open air where anyone could walk by and see them. A stranger could high-five him as Lynn sucked him off.
She looked up at him with those bedroom eyes, those deep pools of her soul that just made him want to destroy her with his body. Her hands slipped from his cock and inside her shirt. Matthew leaned back against the tree to watch her pull out those tits he loved so much, and play with herself as her head bobbed forward and back.
Just as he was starting to force his mind to other places to stave off the pending orgasm, she sucked hard and popped off his cock. Matthew grunted in protest, because he was not ready for it to be over, not at all, when she bit her lips with some of the hottest eye fucking he’d ever seen. He cupped her face to send her back to finish him off, but she smacked his hands away and framed her tits around his erection.
Oh. Fucking. Fuck.
Lynn titty fucked him slowly, pausing every few strokes to lick the top of his head, and started talking dirty again. For such a pretty young thing, she had an awful lot of very naughty ideas. Ways she wanted him to lick her, positions she wanted him to fuck her in, how she wanted him to throw her down in the middle of the park and fuck her until she couldn’t see anymore.
The breathier she became, the harder it was for him to keep his wits about him. And then the little devil bent over and gently bit the head of his cock. He cried out in pain and pleasure. As if driven by his cries, she swallowed him whole once more and an explosion took over his body, starting in his toes and flooding through his veins.
His release was strong, but he felt himself holding back. Fucking heart. Fucking brain. Fucking notes inside flowers and on his desk.
Matthew drew a ragged breath as she licked the last bit of come from his tip. She stood and slid her shorts off. “My turn, big boy.”
She bent down to grab her ankles and slowly pulled herself back up, hands caressing her own body, dipping into the spaces he loved the most. His tired cock wanted to join her, but he needed to pace himself.
“Are you my Sandy?”
“Only if you’re my Danny.”
He laid her out on the pine needle-covered ground and ran his hands along her legs and up her stomach. He loved watching her squirm in delight under his touch. They were like magnets—where he went, her body followed. Her nipples were already firm, and taking them in his mouth was delicious. She writhed against him as he flicked and sucked and nibbled in all the ways she loved. The way she panted and moaned left him wondering if he could get her off on her nipples alone.
But his girl was a hungry one. She wasn’t interested in his foreplay, and he respected that. He dipped down to her belly button and kissed his way down to her pink cunt, laid bare and glistening just for him. He allowed himself one taste, long and slow with her bucking and pleading for more, before he kissed down to her knees and back up. The undersides of her knees were particularly tender, and he loved that.
On the ground, they were hidden by an encampment of bushes, but Lynn was a noisy girl. His cock throbbed again at the thought of getting caught. This park was much busier than the last one they’d met in.
“Someone might hear us,” he rumbled against her clit and she moaned loudly. He growled against it just for fun, watching her beautiful body contort under him. “I think you’d like that.”
She gasped slightly. “Maybe.”
“Maybe?” His tongue slid into her opening and he bit down on her pussy. She cried out again. “Sounds like a definite.”
“Do you remember,” she licked her lips. “When you told me you wanted to fuck me in front of the whole class?”
His balls seized. “God, would I ever love to.”
She bit her lip, looking shy and gorgeous. “I don’t think I’d mind.”
It was his turn to moan, resting his head against her thigh. “You are so goddamn naughty, Lynn. I feel like I need to punish you.”
“Please,” she begged, hands clawing at her nipples. “Please, Matthew. Punish me.”
He inserted two fingers into her opening, moving slowly at first, making love to her clit. As her breaths quickened, he thrust faster, curling his fingers upward to hit all of the best places inside her. She dropped her head sideways and raised her hips upwards so he had to lift up to his knees to get her.
Lynn was primal, clawing at herself under his tongue. Sooner than he expected, his cock leapt up, ready to ravish her. He gripped her hips and flipped her over onto her knees with her ass in the air. He smacked it twice before pulling a condom from his pocket and sliding himself deep within her. She covered her mouth, noises muffled, as he pounded into her until she came.
Her cries were so intense, he came a second time. This time, it swept him away and left him breathless and empty. They slumped together on the ground, panting and kissing until the pine needles dug into their skin.
It hit him then. The sex was hot, it always was, and being in a public place had an element of arousal that was undeniable … but this was the only way they could be together. Everywhere else was dangerous. Never would they have the chance to be a normal couple. He couldn’t even call her his girlfriend. Their encounters would be limited to sneaking around in the dark between rehearsals and curfews. He was twenty-nine goddamn years old, not a teenager.
“This has to be the last time,” he found himself murmuring against her. He didn’t want to let go of her, but had to start gnawing at the tether somehow. “It’s going to ruin us.”
“It’s not the last time.” Lynn bit his lip and his blood ran hot. “I can’t be without you. You can’t be without me. We tried, remember? It’s impossible. We’re meant to be together.”
“You have to. We have to. I can’t keep doing this to you, Lynn.”
“You aren’t doing anything to me, Matthew. I know what this is, I know Romeo and Juliet is a tragedy, but we don’t have to be. We can make it through this.”
He closed his eyes and pulled his hands off of her. “I’m not going to have a hand in your destruction. You know how much I care about you, and sometimes that means walking away.”
“You can’t!” Her voice leapt an octave. “I’ll drop out of school, start looking for work in town. I’m good enough, you said so yourself!”
“If your parents left you alive after that, I’d kill you myself.” Matthew pulled up his jeans and buttoned them, taking great care to not look at her as he got dressed. “Life doesn’t work like that and you have no idea what you’re getting into. The real world isn’t as cut and dried as high school. You can’t just drop classes and start over with something you want. It’s rough out there. Why do you think I’m even here right now?”
“I thought you were here because you loved me.” The hurt and anger bleeding from her voice was brutal.
“I do!” Matthew reached for her. She took a step away, but didn’t fight him. “You know that’s not what I meant.”
“I get a say in this, too, Matthew. You don’t get to just make decisi
ons for me because you’re the teacher or because you’re older. Fuck you. I’m just as much in this as you are, and I’m saying it’s worth it.”
“Can you please—” Matthew froze. Branches nearby rustled and a shadow was running off in the distance. “Shit.”
Someone absolutely saw them. Now it really was over; no more pretending and pleading and arguing about it. This was their final scene, curtains for Romeo and Juliet.
PART THREE
chapter five
LYNN
Lynn was absolutely certain she was going to murder Aria Levens. She came back from Thanksgiving break insufferably worse, for reasons Lynn neither guessed nor cared, and it’d been downhill since then. But she had to die, and that was that.
There was a sort of sweet justice in knowing Lynn wasn’t the only one in the company who thought so. McKenzi Elworth, lead vocals in the choir realm, but unhappily second string to Aria the Diva, was routinely seen storming off the stage, throwing script pages everywhere, and screaming, “You deal with her!”
Aria developed quite a victim’s complex about it, pouting and twisting strands of her long and over-moussed hair, wondering why they all just, “couldn’t get along.”
“Maybe—and I could be wrong here—but maybe you shouldn’t have slept with her boyfriend.” Dave was sprawled in the middle of the stage, running his finger over his lines as he memorized them. “Just a guess.”
“I did no such thing.” Aria huffed dramatically. “That’s a nasty rumor.”
“You would know,” Lynn muttered from her side of the stage. When Aria shot her a glance, Lynn continued peeling up old gaffer tape, pretending she’d said nothing. Another choir girl high-fived her.
But Lynn was right. Aria would fucking know. Because she was still certain Aria sent Matthew all those notes and put them in this terrible and precarious situation, where everything was hot one minute and dead the next.