Honesty

by Angie Foster

  “You really are pretty, you know,” he said quietly as he met her eyes. Alena smiled a little brighter.

  “I can't believe this is happening,” she blurted out as he leaned closer to her.

  “It is,” he replied, the warmth of his breath lingering along her lips. When his lips met hers, Alena waited for the fireworks, for the music to start filling her ears, for her heart to leap out of her chest. But all she really felt was the softness of his lips as they pushed against hers. He started to deepen the kiss, but Alena pulled nervously away. He frowned when she did and studied her intently.

  “I thought we understood each other,” he said with disappointment.

  “What do you mean?” she asked. She was distracted by the fact that it was Shawn she was thinking of after kissing Justin.

  “I mean, just because I'm with Kristina doesn't mean we can't hook up,” Justin shrugged as if it was no big deal.

  “Hook up?” Alena repeated, certain that she could not have heard him correctly.

  “Yeah, you know, have some fun when no one's looking. It'll be our little secret,” he encouraged and leaned forward again to kiss her.

  “Uh, no,” Alena ducked out of the way, just missing his lips. “Are you saying you did not break up with Kristina?”

  “Of course not!” Justin rolled his eyes. “She's like the hottest girl in school. But you know, I like you too, and I thought we could just-”

  “Wow,” Alena was shocked. In that moment she realized that the entire summer she had spent thinking that she was getting to know Justin had been a waste of her time. She didn't know anything about him. She never would have believed he could be such a creep. “You're not who I thought you were,” Alena said sadly as she started to stand up from the bleacher.

  “Hey!” Justin reached and grabbed her wrist firmly. “Don't act all high and mighty; I was just giving you what you wanted.”

  Alena shook her hand free of his grip, determined to fight the tears that were beginning to gather in her eye. “This is not what I wanted,” she said in a trembling voice. That starlight, was what she wanted. The sweet soft kiss, was what she wanted. But a boy making her feel like she wasn't worth more than the dirt on his shoes, was definitely not what she considered to be romantic.

  “Whatever Alena, it's your loss. I mean, I really thought you were mature enough to handle this,” he shook his head dismissively.

  “Mature enough to let you treat me like garbage?” she shot back and balled her hands into fists. “You know something Justin, I spent so much time feeling like Kristina was so lucky to have you, but now I know, I'm the lucky one.”

  He glared at her as she turned on her heel and walked away.

  As she walked home Alena was more than hurt, she was angry, but not at Justin. She was angry at herself. Shawn had been right there, waiting patiently for her. He had made sure she knew just how important she was to him, and how much he valued her. Yet she had risked all of that by going to meet Justin.

  “I figured you would go,” a voice said from a bench she was passing. She paused and looked over to see Shawn sitting there. He had his palms pressed against his knees as he stared hard at the ground beneath his feet.

  “Were you following me?” Alena asked with surprise.

  “No,” he shook his head, refusing to look up at her. “I saw the text on your phone,” he admitted. “I know what kind of guy Justin is, I just wanted to make sure that you were okay,” only then did he look up at her, through the shadows that the tree branches above him created in the moonlight. “I hoped maybe, you wouldn't go.”

  Alena kicked the tip of her shoe against the sidewalk she stood on as she wrapped her arms across her stomach. “I shouldn't have,” she confessed, her voice wavering with the tears she still had not let fall.

  “You had to,” Shawn replied as he leaned forward a little on the bench. “You need to be sure, I get that.

  So what do you think of him now?”

  Alena reached up and wiped at a tear that slipped past her dark lashes. Shawn stood up from the bench and walked over to her.

  “It's okay,” he whispered as he reached out to take her hand gently in his own. “It's easy to be blinded by what you want to see, instead of what's really there,” he brushed her hair back gently from her face as he studied the tears that were still in her eyes. In that moment Alena realized that it wasn't just Justin she had been blind to, it was Shawn. Just because he didn't look like the type of boy she thought she should want to be with, she had never even noticed him. She had never even considered that there might be such an amazing person behind those wisps of blonde hair that escaped his ponytail. But he had looked. He had looked beyond the surface of her superficial interests, and seen who she really was. He had been brave enough to be honest about what he wanted.

  “I'm sorry,” she whispered as he met her eyes.

  “For what?” he asked as he moved just a little closer to her.

  “I'm sorry I did not see you before,” Alena murmured. “And now, it's too late, isn't it?” she asked. “Now you know that I'm not worth it?”

  Shawn winced at her words as he slid his hand across her shoulder and around to the back of her neck. He drew her lips close to his and they shared a sweet, soft kiss as the moonlight filtered down over them. When he pulled slightly away, he sought out her eyes and held them with his own honest gaze.

  “Alena, you will always be worth it.”