Sweet Hope

by Tillie Cole

  For a minute, I looked down at my pale-pink knee-length chiffon shirtdress, my black fitted blazer, and my favorite pair of brown cowboy boots that I’d had for years. My hair was tied with chopsticks and I wore large silver loops in my ears.

  I’d asked Molly a million times if what I was wearing was okay. She assured me it was. But Molly really couldn’t give two shits about what she or I looked like, never had. What she didn’t see, however, was that she always looked beautiful no matter what she wore. And today was no exception, as she sported a long black dress, the clingy jersey material showcasing her growing bump and stunning figure. Her long brown hair was curly and flowing down her back, her square-framed Chanel glasses complimenting her pretty face.

  Hearing someone enter the suite, I turned to see Lexi and Levi walk in. Lexi beamed a huge smile at us all, waving excitedly as she wore her “Carillo” Seahawks home jersey with a pair of jeans. Levi was wearing the navy-and-green jersey too. I expected him to come and say hello. Instead, he jerked his chin in a brief greeting and walked to the far side of the suite to sag down in a chair.

  Frowning at his strange behavior, I held out my hands to Lexi and kissed her cheek. “How’re you doing, darlin?” I asked.

  “Good, you?” she answered, but I could see she was distracted about something.

  Blushing, I dipped my head. “I’m real good.”

  Lexi cocked her head to the side as she regarded me. “What—”

  “She’s been out all night, Lex,” Molly interrupted from beside us, and Lexi’s eyes widened in interest.

  “Who with? Do tell?” Lexi asked, leading me to a couch in the corner of the room. Molly followed and we all sat down.

  “Taking a deep breath, I couldn’t fight the smile pulling on my face. “Elpidio,” I confessed, and Lexi’s thrilled smile reflected my own.

  “The reclusive artist?” she asked, curiously.

  “Yes,” I replied, giggling.

  “And?” Molly asked. “What happened last night? You’ve said nothing about it yet. You’ve kept me on tenterhooks!”

  I shrugged. I wasn’t sure how to explain what Elpi and I had shared. It wasn’t normal by any stretch of the imagination, and honestly, by both his looks and closed-off attitude to seemingly everyone but me, I knew my friends would warn me to stay away.

  Lexi and Molly were waiting anxiously for my answer, so I simply said, “It was the best night of my life. He’s beyond anything I could ever have imagined.”

  Molly reached over me and pulled me in for a happy hug, and Lexi could do nothing but smile. I laughed at Molly’s reaction when a server came by to hand us glasses of champagne.

  As I reached out for my flute, I noticed Levi slumped further into his chair, looking out over the field, with headphones on, music blaring, blocking out the world, lost in thought. He looked miserable. My eyebrows pulled down.

  “Lex?” I called and, stopping her conversation about Austin’s debut today with Molly, she turned to face me.

  I nudged my head in the direction of Levi. “What’s wrong with Lev? He looks as miserable as sin and barely said hello when y’all walked in.”

  Lexi ran her tiny hand, sporting black nail varnish, down her face, glancing sympathetically at Levi, then back to us. “Axel,” she said on an exasperated sigh.

  I grimaced. “Shit. Yeah. Molly and Rome told me he’d got out of prison. How’s all that going? I haven’t had time to ask you much about it.”

  “Axel’s quiet, don’t say much at all. Keeps to himself. I actually kinda feel sorry for him. He’s always on his own.” I leaned forward to pat Lexi’s hand. She squeezed my fingers. “But Levi… Levi’s just angry all the time. And it breaks me seeing him this way… both of them this way. Axel tries to speak to Levi, he’s really trying to make amends, but Lev just explodes if he does. It’s hopeless.”

  “And what’s wrong with him today? It’s Austin’s debut for the Seahawks. I thought he’d be excited. And they’re playing Reece’s team too, so he’ll get to see him again.”

  “He is,” Lexi answered, “but Axel’s due here any minute. Austin wanted Axe here so bad he begged him to show up. It tore me apart seeing how excited Austin was that Axe was gonna finally see him play in the NFL. That husband of mine hero-worships his big brother. Even after everything they’ve gone through, he loves him to death.”

  “Axel’s coming here today?” I asked in a wary voice, my eyes widening. I instantly felt uneasy. I’d never met the guy or even laid eyes on him, but I knew he was nothing but trouble with a capital T. Shit, he’d just gotten out of prison for Christ’s sake.

  Lexi nodded. “Like I said, Austin wanted Axel here. And credit where credit’s due, Axel’s really trying. He’s keeping out of trouble and his head down. He’s working at this fish market the prison organized as part of his parole, all the hours God sends. But even still, Levi just can’t forgive him yet. I think he’s afraid to trust him and love him like he needs, just to have Axel fall back to his old ways. Levi’s lost too much too young. I think he’s trying to protect his heart from more pain. But I want them to be a family again so bad. I’ll do anything to make that happen, for all their sakes.”

  As I listened to my little friend, I felt a swell of pride fill my chest. She’d conquered so much from being so young, brought herself back from the brink of death, twice, managed to become a successful business woman by helping others suffering from eating disorders, and now, she was desperately trying to pull together a group of brothers torn apart by years of nothing but acts of selfishness and grief.

  The three of us were sitting in silence when Lexi’s cell phone beeped. She looked down and moved to get to her feet. “Axel’s outside. I’m going down to meet him. I’ll bring him up here to watch the game.”

  Lexi walked across the suite to Levi and tapped him on the shoulder. Levi moved the headphones from his ears. “Axel’s outside, sweetie. You wanna come and get him with me?”

  Levi’s eyes frosted with venom and, putting the headphones on his head, he said, “Just fucking leave him out there, Lex.”

  Lexi’s shoulders sagged, and without looking Molly’s way or mine, she left the suite to meet Axel.

  I blew a long breath out of my mouth, and Molly shook her head. “It’s a mess,” she said, and taking a sip of my champagne, I nodded in agreement.

  “So tell me all about the ins and outs of this gallery you’re designing. It feels like it’s been forever since we’ve had a real chance to catch up.”

  “Well…” I started and launched into the goings on of the last few weeks and the ups and downs of constructing the Elpidio show.

  Too busy talking to Molly, my back to the entrance of the private suite, I didn’t see Lexi walking in behind us until Molly’s golden-brown eyes looked up over her glasses and she adopted a nervous expression. Twisting in my seat, I saw Lexi in front of me.

  “Ally, Molly,” Lexi said, and I stood from the couch, seeing someone enter the suite in my peripheral vision. Suddenly, my cell rang from inside my purse, and I saw it was the museum.

  “Sorry, Lex, let me take this,” I said and rushed to the far side of the room out of sight. The call ended up taking ten minutes, a carpenter stressing about the measurements of a plinth he was building.

  Walking back into the room, my gaze got lost at the screaming Seahawks crowd on their feet and the cheerleaders running on the field. I headed to where Lexi sat, seeing her pixie face turn to me. Lexi immediately got to her feet, and I saw Molly raise her eyebrows toward a guy sitting behind Lexi. I could hardly see him as he sat in a dark corner, just his bulky arm propping his head up on the arm of the chair visible from where I stood.

  “Sorry about that, darlin’,” I said. “I’m on the clock twenty-four-seven at the minute!”

  “No problem,” Lexi said and motioned behind her. “Ally, I’d like you to meet Axel, Austin’s older brother.”

  Feeling nervous at meeting the guy responsible for so much of my friends’ pa
in, my hands actually shook. The guy behind Lexi reluctantly got to his feet. His broad back was covered in a long-sleeved black shirt, the arms rolled up to his elbows, and his hair was covered in a oversized black beanie hanging low in the back, covering his neck.

  Shit, I thought. He was huge. Probably bigger than Austin in terms of his muscle size.

  Lexi moved to the side, and I took a deep breath as the notorious bad boy of Bama turned to face me, and as my eyes slammed to meet a pair of dark Italian eyes… a pair of familiar dark Italian eyes that were etched into my heart…

  All the blood drained from my face.

  No… It’s… it’s not possible…

  Elpi’s tanned bearded face turned ashen as I stared at him, mouth gaping and his always-stern eyes widened in alarm.

  We both stood there, frozen to the spot.

  Unmoving.

  Silent.

  Just staring…

  Elpidio is… Axel Carillo?

  I flitted a glance to the left and caught sight of Lexi’s worried face.

  Forcing myself to react, I held out my shaky hand. Elpi, I mean Axel’s mouth tightened at the action.

  “Hi,” I whispered shakily, flinching as his warm palm met mine and sent the usual bolt of electricity shooting up my spine.

  Axel dipped his head in greeting, just as Lexi added, “This is Ally Prince, Axel, Rome Prince’s cousin.”

  Axel’s hand tightened in mine at Lexi’s announcement, and I could see the disdain for my cousin written all over his face.

  I pulled back my hand and my gaze involuntary ran down Axel’s large body. A body I now knew intimately.

  The announcer took to the mic across the field, working the strong crowd into a crazed frenzy. The Seahawks team was coming out.

  But I couldn’t move.

  “Ally! Quickly, or you’ll miss Rome and Austin coming out of the tunnel,” Molly said, and Lexi rushed to sit beside her, leaving Axel and me locked in a tense gaze.

  “Ally!” Molly called again. Finally able to move my feet, I staggered toward where my best friend sat, glancing back to see Axel moving to the farthest seat on the other side of the long paneled glass… the seat that offered him the perfect view of me. And he kept staring. I felt his eyes on me as clearly as I could feel the subtle heat from the vent beside my feet blowing in hot air.

  I couldn’t believe it.

  My heart cried as I looked out of the window… I was completely infatuated with Axel Carillo.

  Feeling his gaze burning through my eyelids, I reluctantly looked up, just as Molly and Lexi jumped to their feet. Levi had moved beside Lexi, leaving Axel sitting on the opposite side of the suite on his own.

  That alone made my heart squeeze. He appeared every inch the outcast, his own brother blatantly rejecting him… the black sheep of the Carillos, lost and scorned, forced to be on his own.

  A hand suddenly lay on my shoulder. Molly was looking at me. “Ally, they’re just about to announce Austin and Rome. Reece is already on the field for the Redskins.”

  I focused on the field and pride raced through my veins seeing the banners and jerseys reading “Prince 7.” My cousin had come through so much and deserved all of this. I also saw Reece, strutting on the side of the field, ever the egomaniac. I hadn’t seen him once since college.

  I smiled in forced excitement as fireworks and pyrotechnics burst through CenturyLink, music blaring through the speakers. Reaching down, I took Molly’s hand, gripping it tightly. I needed her support. Not through excitement for Rome’s first game of the season, but for keeping me composed at the revelation I’d just experienced.

  Elpidio was Axel.

  My heart was shattered.

  Molly and Lexi both had tears in their eyes, waiting for their husbands to take the field, and when I looked to Lexi’s side, Levi was gripping her hand too. There was nothing but adoration on his handsome face for his brother, Austin, as he awaited the announcement of the newest Seahawk. But a pit swallowed my stomach when I saw his clear disregard for Axel.

  I thought of the little boy sculpture, and I fought not to break down and sob at all the realizations rushing through my mind.

  It’s Axel and Levi…

  The announcer revved up the crowd, as he began his introduction of Austin. I heard Lexi hold her breath as they ran through her husband’s football accolades. Levi lifted Lexi’s hand and pressed it to his chest, a huge smile pulled on his normally shy face as the crowd roared their approval and welcome for their new wide receiver.

  Seconds later, to a line of flaming pyrotechnics, Austin Carillo ran onto the field. Lexi silently cried in happiness beside me, but that’s not what nearly brought me to tears too… No, that honor belonged to a tall, lonely figure standing on his own at the farthest side of the room. A lonely figure with his muscled arms folded across his broad chest, the most heartbreaking expression of pride on his face, as he watched his brother hold his helmet up to the crowd. An awed flicker of a smirk pulled on his lips as I watched whispers of tears tumble down his cheeks.

  Axel Carillo cared… Axel Carillo cared more than anyone thought about his brother… his family… more than I could ever have thought possible from the hellish reputation that travelled with him.

  Pain racked my body. I was crushed that Elpidio was really Axel Carillo. How the hell could this be? It felt like the universe was playing a mean trick on me.

  As if feeling my hard stare, Axel’s eyes darted to mine, his proud flicker of a smile dropping in embarrassment at being caught, and he quickly wiped at his eyes, looking away from me.

  Molly’s hand squeezed mine, and as I met her eyes, she was looking between Axel and me with a strange expression on her face.

  Leaning close to my ear, I stiffened as Molly went to say something, when the stadium positively lifted in volume, the announcer barely audible over the fans’ screams. Molly pulled away, her eyes immediately fixed on the players’ tunnel as Rome was announced. To the line of scantily clad cheerleaders waving pompoms and fireworks lighting up the stadium, Rome Prince took the field.

  Molly exhaled, and I watched her eyes fix on her husband as he stopped dead in the middle of the frenzy, pure love in her stare as her hand ran over her round stomach. Rome faced our suite, and holding his helmet in his hand, pressed his fingers to his lips in Molly’s direction. Molly sniffed back her sobs and returned the gesture. Rome smiled and tapped his chest over his heart. He ran toward Austin, throwing his hand around Austin's shoulders.

  Molly laughed, choking on emotion. “Sorry, guys, it’s my hormones,” she said, wiping her cheeks.

  Releasing her hand and wiping at her cheeks with my thumb, I said, “Nah, it’s just you two.”

  Molly laughed, and we sat down.

  Truth was I wanted a love like theirs… a soul-shattering, leave you breathless kind of love…

  That thought had my eyes instinctively searching for Elpi under my lashes and we immediately locked gazes. He was still watching me, that intense, see-into-my-soul Italian stare of his was burning into mine.

  The whistle sounded on the field, making me jump, forcing me to look away from the man I feared I’d already lost my heart to. I made myself watch the game and tried not to think of all the wrongs he’d done in his past… the mountain of wrongs… the wrongs I wasn't sure I could ever get past…

  Chapter Twelve

  Ally

  The Seahawks won. Austin even scored a debut touchdown, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at Elpi’s reaction. In fact, the longer I sat in this chair, the more I couldn’t take the tension pulsing between us.

  “Ally?”

  Blinking fast, realizing Lexi was calling my name, I glanced to my side. Lexi leaned forward, waving for me to lean forward too.

  “You okay?” she whispered, and cautiously watched Axel as he stared out the window at the emptying field.

  I nodded, but Lexi said, “He won’t hurt you, you know.”

  My forehead pulled down in confusion. “Wha
t are you—”

  “You’ve been staring at Axel all game, and I know it’s because you’re scared. He looks scary, all those scars and tattoos, and those dark eyes that look like they can incinerate people where they stand. But he won’t hurt you. You can be assured of that.”

  Shocked that I’d obviously been paying Axel so much attention, I simply nodded and sat back in my seat, praying Rome and Austin would hurry and get up here so we could leave.

  I needed time to think. I just needed time to friggin’ deal...

  Then Axel got up from his chair and I froze.

  My hands grew damp as I watched Axel scan the room, and Molly and Lexi watched him too. Axel’s head was downcast and his fists were clenching and unclenching. He acted nervous about something, and the reason for that nervousness was soon revealed when he walked to Levi.

  “You wanna go get a drink or something to eat with me, kid?” he asked, and my pulse raced, seeing the flare of hope spark in his eyes.

  But Levi ignored him and kept his head down. Levi’s face was stone as his jaw clenched.

  “Lev?” Axel prompted and reached out to touch Levi’s shoulder.

  Levi ripped his shoulder away. “I ain’t going nowhere with you.”

  The expression of raw hurt that ghosted across Axel’s face was my undoing. It cut to the core and carved a pit of sympathy in my stomach the size of the Grand Canyon. I fought the urge to jump to my feet and hold him in my arms.

  “I’ll have a water please, Axe, if you’re going to the bar?” Lexi said, and Axel nodded, seemingly thankful for something to do after being so harshly shunned. He moved to leave the suite, but not before he flickered his eyes to me, desperate hurt glinting in his gaze.

  When Axel had left the room, Lexi faced Levi. “Lev, did you have to be like that?” she said, clear disappointment in her tone.

  Levi shrugged. “I didn’t want a damn drink.”

  Lexi sighed and dropped her head.

  Molly shuffled forward to comfort Lexi, when Rome walked into the suite.

  Rome, as always, bee-lined for Molly and, wrapping his arms around her, pulled her in for a kiss.