Reckless Destiny

by Teresa Southwick

  The wind picked up, strong and fragrant with the scent of creosote bushes, and pressed her cotton shirt against her, molding it to her breasts. The wide brim of her hat fluttered and flapped low over her forehead. Prince dipped his head and shook it, rattling his bridle and snorting loudly. Thoughtfully, she patted his neck again.

  She had better find out if Kane still had a wife or she could wind up looking like a bigger fool than he already thought she was.

  She turned her face to the sun, letting the warmth seep into her skin. The morning was still comfortable, but it was beginning to heat up. She had decided to take her ride early, before it got too uncomfortable.

  To her left, she saw dust from another rider and figured someone else had had the same idea. She waved and saw a responding gesture. As the rider approached, she saw it was a man in uniform. When he was closer, she recognized Kane. As he wheeled his horse up beside hers, the animal shook its head restlessly.

  “Good morning,” she said, giving him a big smile.

  He nodded. “Morning. You’re up bright and early.”

  The sound of his deep voice washed over her, raising gooseflesh on her arms. Her saddle creaked as she shifted. He looked wonderful on a horse, she thought. Straight and tall, strong and sure. She searched for something to say.

  “I couldn’t sleep.” Would he know it was because of him? His expression didn’t change. “I figured I might as well get up and ride Prince.” She patted the animal’s neck. “He really needed the exercise.”

  “I saw you let him have his head.” A grudging note of admiration wrapped around his words. “You ride well.”

  A ripple of pleasure skittered down her spine. “Thanks. I love riding. Jack taught me. He used to let me tag along with him when I was a little girl.”

  He folded his hands on the pommel of his saddle. There was a bemused expression on his face, but he didn’t say anything.

  “What is it, captain? I took your advice. I’m wearing a hat.” She pointed to the low-crowned black felt covering her hair.

  “Looks a little big.”

  “There’s just no pleasing you. The other one was too small; this one’s too big.” She smiled. “Actually it doesn’t stay on unless I stuff my hair up underneath. It’s Jack’s. He gave it to me when I was eleven, after I begged and pleaded.”

  “Do you always get what you want, Cady Tanner?”

  She thought about his question. He should know better than anyone that things didn’t always go her way. If they did, he’d have listened two years ago when she tried to convince him he needed her.

  “My father always said, When you want something, go after it with everything you’ve got.”

  “What if things don’t work out the way you hoped?”

  “Then he’d say, Sometimes you get the bear and sometimes the bear gets you.”

  He chuckled. “Did it make you feel better?”

  “It made me laugh. So, yes, I guess it did.”

  They stared off into the distance for a few moments without talking. A tumbleweed skipped and rolled across the desert floor, propelled by the wind. The only thing Cady could think about was his wife. She was bursting with curiosity, but that wasn’t the sort of thing she could just blurt out.

  “You said you were watching me ride. Why didn’t you join me?”

  “After you slammed the door in my face last night? I wasn’t sure you wouldn’t shoot me today.”

  “Oh, that.” She tipped her head slightly. “You should know something about me. I’m quick to anger, and just as quick to get over it.”

  His eyes were in shadow, but the corners of his mouth turned up. “I’ll remember that.”

  She bit her lower lip. Beneath her the horse shifted restlessly. “Easy, boy,” she said, smoothing her gloved hand over his neck. She looked at Kane. “I guess he’s tired of standing. I’m going to walk him around for a while and cool him off before I take him back.”

  “Good idea.”

  Nervously, she cleared her throat. It was now or never. She might as well see if her theory was correct. “You probably have a hundred orders to give at the fort, but I’ll ask anyway. Would you care to join me if I promise not to shoot you? I don’t have a gun, and even if I did, I wouldn’t know how to use it.”

  Kane scanned the desert around the fort, and his expression turned grim. “I will join you because I do have a gun and I know how to use it. In spite of what Major Wexler said, it’s not safe for you to be out riding alone.”

  A feeling started in the pit of her stomach, something like a warm glow. He was concerned about her safety. Would he bother if he disliked her? Common sense told her no. He could have made an excuse and left.

  But that pesky common sense she prided herself on also told her he was first, last, and always a soldier. He would make certain any woman was safe. Had he agreed to join her because he wanted to be with her or because she was a female alone? Did he only feel obligated to do his duty as an officer and a gentleman?

  Instinct—or maybe wishful thinking—told her he had joined her because he wanted to ride with her.

  A grin built inside her, but she didn’t let it show. He had just passed the first test. Now she had to find out if he was still married.

  Side by side, they rode in silence for a while. Finally, Kane looked over at her. “What’s on your mind?”

  She thought about denying his question and decided not to. “A lot of things.”

  “Want to talk about anything in particular?”

  “I’m afraid to bring up unpleasant memories for you.”

  “Why don’t you let me decide.”

  “All right.” She stared straight ahead as she rolled gently from side to side with the horse’s gait. “Are you still married?” From the corner of her eye, she saw the muscle in his cheek jerk.

  “No,” he said simply.

  “Is that all you’re going to say?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then I won’t ask any more questions.”

  “Good.”

  “About your wife, that is.”

  One corner of his mouth lifted. “So that’s not all you had on your mind.”

  “No.”

  “Is it something else that will bring up unpleasant memories?”

  “Only for me, I think.”

  His horse danced sideways, restless and high-strung. Kane pulled in the reins and skillfully used his body to keep his seat. The corded muscles in his thighs rippled and stretched against the material of his uniform pants. She swallowed at the sudden tightness in her throat.

  “Easy, Soldier Boy.” He met her gaze. “Sorry. He’s a little skittish. Independent. Doesn’t like to be told what to do. Not unlike someone I know.”

  She smiled. “I’ve been that way all my life.”

  “What makes you think I was talking about you?” He grinned.

  She blinked. “Weren’t you?”

  “I meant R. J. Soldier doesn’t get along with him. I think it’s Prince’s scent that’s setting him off.”

  Finally, the animal calmed and they moved forward again. Kane sat a horse as if he were born to it. His powerful masculinity set her pulse to racing as if she were flying across the desert, low on her horse’s back, with the wind blowing her hair out behind her. Kane was big and strong and he made her feel safe. It would be so easy to let herself rely on him.

  That tripped warning bells in her head.

  She had come west to prove she could take care of herself. She wanted to make her own decisions and live life the way she chose. Was she playing with fire here? If she persevered in her quest to see how Kane felt, would she get burned?

  “So what is this unpleasant thing you’ve been thinking about?” he asked.

  She tipped her head back and looked at the sky as her lips pressed tightly together.

  “You don’t have to tell me if you’d rather not,” he added.

  “No.” She glanced at him then straight ahead. “I think I need to get it off my chest.�
�� She fixed her gaze on Prince’s ears as they flicked back and forth. “I want to apologize to you for the way I behaved that night at Fort Mohave. It was inexcusable.”

  “Fort Mohave?” His horse pranced uneasily as Kane reflexively jerked the reins. “I don’t recall that you have anything to be sorry about.”

  “I threw myself at you like a foolish schoolgirl.”

  “You were a schoolgirl.”

  “Still, it was immature and unladylike. I’m sorry.”

  Kane was surprised at her confession. If she thought she had something to be ashamed of, she was wrong. He had been ill-mannered and just this side of rude, but he had pushed her away for her own good.

  He glanced at her now, sitting straight in the saddle, the reins loosely held in her hands. The wind blew the floppy brim of her hat off her forehead, revealing the smooth skin of her face. Freckles stretched across her cheeks. A thoughtful expression clouded her eyes, and he noticed her shiner was less visible this morning.

  In her white cotton blouse and split riding skirt, no one would mistake her for a rich eastern lady. But there was no doubt she was all woman. The scent of lilacs filled his head and once again he had the impression of a lush meadow bursting with pink-purple flowers. A gust of wind pushed the material of her bodice against her, outlining the fullness of her breasts and emphasizing the narrowness of her waist. As she competently controlled her horse, the shape of her slender thighs and calves was evident even through the thickness of her skirt.

  He couldn’t get the image of those legs wrapped around his waist out of his mind. This vision had kept him awake into the early morning hours. Even now, his breathing quickened at the sight, sound, and smell of her. He shook his head, trying to push the forbidden images away.

  “My own behavior was nothing to be proud of.”

  “You were a perfect gentleman.”

  There was almost a tinge of regret in her voice.

  Cady took a deep breath. “I think what stirred my temper that night two years ago was your comment that someone who couldn’t start a cook fire had no business in the Territory,” she said, quoting his own words.

  “I haven’t changed my opinion.”

  “I didn’t expect you had, given the fact that you never miss an opportunity to tell me I don’t belong here.”

  “I haven’t changed my opinion about that, either. But you’re the one who keeps bringing it up.”

  She looked over at him and, in the shadow of her big black hat, her eyes flashed. It was the only evidence of the hair-trigger temper she’d showed him the previous evening when she’d slammed the door in his face. He’d never met a woman who kept him so off balance.

  “Then let’s put the issue to rest once and for all.”

  “How do you propose to do that?”

  “What if I prove to you I can start a cook fire and even make supper over it? Will you take back what you said? Will that convince you that I can take care of myself out here?”

  “Depends on how tasty the supper is.”

  “I didn’t say it has to be good, just that I can make it. If I were cooking in my mother’s kitchen back home, I couldn’t guarantee to satisfy your taste. But I’ll tell you this: You won’t starve.”

  He was starving now. He wanted her with a hunger that seemed to get bigger every time he saw her. He was crazy, probably been out in the sun too long, a voice inside him insisted. He silenced it.

  “How can I resist?”

  “All right, then. How about tonight. Sunday supper? Say, six o’clock?”

  This might be the biggest mistake of his life, Kane thought, but he didn’t have it in him to say no.

  “I’ll be there.”

  Reynolds J. Wexler, Jr., quietly climbed out of his bedroom window and settled the checkerboard more securely under his arm. He glanced to the left and the right to make sure no one saw him leave his room. John Eagle had taught him how to move without being heard. The thought of his former friend made him feel empty inside.

  He wished John had never caught that old snake. Maybe if he hadn’t they’d still … shoot, what was the use of thinking on that? He was just glad John had showed him how to be quiet when he didn’t want no one to hear him. Like now. It wouldn’t be dark for a while yet and he had to be careful to stay to the shadows.

  His mother had confined him to his room. But when his father was gone, which was most of the time, she fell asleep soon after supper. She was snorin’ away now. Kane had punished him too but didn’t know what his ma had said about not comin’ out until he could be a civilized gentleman. And Kane wouldn’t care if he did know, R. J. told himself. This was their checkers night. What could be more important than that?

  R. J. knew he would be lucky this time. In their weekly Sunday evening checker game, R. J. usually came out the loser. As much as he hated losing, he liked it that Kane didn’t let him win. That made him feel good. If he couldn’t win fair and square, he didn’t want to win at all. But he was feeling lucky tonight. He would beat the pants off the captain for sure this time, he just knew he would.

  He turned the corner of the long row of adobe buildings and skidded to a stop. “Jumpin’ Jehoshaphat!”

  Kane was standing beneath the ramada, and that old maid schoolmarm was smilin’ up at him all sweet and big-eyed. R. J. backed up and peeked around the corner, keeping himself hidden.

  It made R. J. plumb sick to his stomach. He still couldn’t figure why in blue blazes Kane had given up his quarters to that ol’ teacher. Officers didn’t do that for nobody. They always took the best for themselves, otherwise what was the good of outrankin’ someone else?

  Didn’t make any sense at all. And why in tarnation was he visiting her? Something terrible crossed his mind and his eyes widened as that empty feeling in his stomach got bigger. Was Kane courtin’ Miss Tanner? R. J. cautiously leaned around the corner and stared at the captain. Even from this side view, he could tell Kane wasn’t smilin’. Not by a long shot. And he had a funny look on his face like he was mad as all get out.

  His sweaty palms caused the checkerboard to slip, and R. J. slid his hand down his wool trousers. Then he settled the game more firmly against his side. He wasn’t sweatin’ because he was nervous after sneakin’ out and all. It was from writin’ all those dang standards she’d given him. Not to mention the blisters he had from choppin’ wood. No wonder he couldn’t even hang on to the gosh-darn board.

  Worst of all, he missed Prince somethin’ fierce. He missed racin’ Bart Grimes across the parade ground. He missed the feelin’ he got when he and Prince beat the tar outa everyone. He stuck his head out and peeked carefully around the corner of the building, just in time to see Kane go inside. It appeared he was gonna miss his weekly checkers game, too.

  And it was all her fault.

  R. J. was tempted to tell her to go to blazes, only Kane would wallop him good if he did. The way the captain had looked while she was holding her face, R. J. had been sure he was gonna get whacked for blacking her eye, even though he hadn’t meant to.

  He waited for a long time, hoping Kane would come out. But he never did. Didn’t he remember they always played checkers on Sunday night?

  Why in tarnation would Kane rather see that ol’ Miss Tanner than play checkers? She must be holding something over his head or Kane wouldn’t be caught dead that close to her.

  “Jumpin’ Jehoshaphat! Maybe he’s tryin’ to get her to let up on the standards.” R. J. grinned. Yeah, that must be it.

  He waited, staying until the sun went down, but Kane didn’t come out. He would’ve watched all night, but he had to go to the necessary. He turned away, shaking his head.

  The captain wasn’t like his pa; he always kept his word. He never missed a checkers night, unless he was away on patrol. So it had to be that ol’ schoolmarm’s fault. It was just one more in the long list of gripes R. J. had against her. The list was getting longer all the time. He’d pay her back someday, too.

  “Just see if I don’t,”
he grumbled.

  Kane glanced around his former quarters while Cady put his hat on the dresser. Everything looked different, definitely smelled different—better. Feminine articles were scattered around the room. A silver brush and mirror rested on the dresser with ribbons beside them, dresses hung on hooks on the wall to his right, pages from a ladies’ magazine were tacked up on the wall to the left of the fireplace.

  This room felt more like a home after a few days of Cady’s presence than it ever had while he’d lived there. In fact, she’d put his hat on the dresser because her beat-up floppy black one was already on the peg by the door where he used to keep his.

  “I see you’ve made yourself at home,” he said, taking a deep breath.

  She looked around, then up at him. The smooth skin between her brows puckered slightly. “I hope that’s all right.”

  “Of course.”

  Her scent was womanly and soft and tempting. He shut his eyes for a second. He couldn’t let his feelings loose. If he did, he’d never be in control again.

  He should never have come. If he had the sense the good Lord gave a rock, he’d turn right around and walk out that door.

  “I’m glad you approve. I thought pictures would brighten the walls up a bit,” she said. Her shoes scraped on the canvas floor as she walked to the dresser.

  He stared at the provocative sway of her full cotton skirts as she moved away from him. His gaze moved to the curve of her back and her hair, twisted up into a braid. He wanted to see it down, loose around her shoulders, tousled as if … Stop, he told himself.

  He returned his attention to Cady. Behind her on the dresser, his hat rested between a black velvet ribbon and the stuffed snake. On the left corner was a photograph.

  “Who’s in the picture?” he asked.

  He moved beside her to see the tintype and recognized her two brothers, Jeff and Jack. The older man and woman he took to be her parents. He studied Cady’s likeness. The unsmiling image didn’t do her justice. It didn’t capture the sparkle that lighted her green eyes or the mischievous smile he had learned to be wary of.