Fianna Kelly Versus the Jeebees: A Collection of Steampunk Stories

by Harry Dodgson

  It took four shots for me to get the exact centre of the target. I would need more practice before I could use this at the tournament.

  "Now try the farthest target and then I'll let you practice while I talk with the crowd that you have attracted."

  How did he know I was thinking about practicing? Perhaps all the soldiers ask for time to get used to a new weapon. I glanced over my shoulder briefly and saw five people watching. This rifle, now my rifle, was better in every way from my old one. It was funny how I was thinking about my rifles. So much had changed in just a short time. I couldn't bring myself to stop until I ran out of cartridges.

  He noticed when the firing stopped. "Finished so soon? Clean your rifle, put it away, and we'll see how you did."

  We walked in silence to the other end of the range. I knew what we'd see since I had seen it clearly through the telescope on the rifle.

  He took the target down and inspected it. He said, "These three that are too high were probably before you were sighted in so I will ignore them. The rest show good accuracy, but your precision needs work."

  "I need more practice with it... I don't know how to thank you."

  "Don't thank me yet. Let's check out what else I have." He held out a wooden box. "I noticed that you don't have a close-range weapon. The jeebees attack very quickly and could be on top of you before you can ready your rifle. A revolver could save your life."

  I said, "I'm not very good with a pistol."

  "In this box is a Belgian-made LeMat revolver. It will stop anything that your rifle doesn't. Nine shots with .44 calibre bullets plus one 20-gauge shotgun shell.

  I didn't believe it. "You have got to be kidding! The pistol fires a shotgun shell?"

  "The Yanks loved the cap and ball version when they were fighting amongst themselves. This style came much later and was not popular. If they have another war, that could change."

  We headed back to the stand and I opened the case. The pistol was not pretty. I could see why it wasn't popular. Hopefully it was useful.

  He said, "When I went to get a holster for it, the harness maker asked me questions that I couldn't answer, like your waist size. He gave me all these pieces and asked me to return the ones you didn't need."

  I asked him, "How long have you known I would still be here?"

  "Colonel Reynolds and I had a long discussion last night as soon as we heard about you. I wasn't sure you would be here now, but I was ready just in case you were."

  I chose an attractive belt and attached a holster through the belt loops. I put the holster on the left side for cross draw use and slid the pistol in with the butt facing forward. The holster had been made to accommodate both barrels and the large cylinder. I wouldn't be using it in a fast draw competition though, but with it holstered, it didn't look that ugly.

  He asked, "Is there a reason you prefer to have the pistol in the holster like that? I know that cavalrymen are known to wear their sabres on the right and their pistols on the left."

  "I haven't used a sabre. This is just more comfortable for me."

  He stated, "You probably won't hit the far target with this pistol, no matter how hard you try. It was made for close quarters and does very well at that. Stay with what you are best at, rifles, and pray you never have to use the pistol. All of our men, both officers and enlisted, are now armed with pistols and yet we still lose many to the jeebees."

  Firing the rifle was satisfying. The bullet went very close to where I wanted it to go. The pistol, on the other hand, put the bullet somewhere on the target. The sights were misleading, if not completely useless for me. I fired 18 bullets and two shotgun shells to get a feel for the pistol.

  He brought the target to me. "I see you managed to hit the target. That is all that counts as far as I am concerned."

  I replied, "I would much rather hit what I aimed at."

  "Are there any cartridges left in it?"

  "No, I practice safe pistol use. It should not be ready to fire unless I am."

  He smiled at me. "That is good to hear. Keep doing that when you can, but we are fighting against the jeebees and most of us have no warning when they will attack. I recommend that you keep it loaded with eight cartridges and the hammer on an empty chamber. You can also keep a shotgun shell loaded if you are careful to keep the selection lever raised."

  I tried asking this again. "Speaking of loaded guns, where can I get ammunition?"

  "I think we can arrange for some to be put on the train. I presume you have accepted the Colonel's offer?"

  "I did."

  He said, "You look confused."

  "Why are you giving me these? As you know, the Colonel wants Bradan and I to look for jeebee hideouts in exchange for a ride to London. What task need I perform to earn these?"

  "If a soldier had accomplished the actions you did yesterday, he would have deserved a medal. The two men who were with you there will receive one apiece. They both swear they are only here to receive them because of you. So for saving the lives of two men and providing valuable information about the enemy, I hereby present you with these tokens of our appreciation."

  I replied, "It's not like they sat there watching me shoot. They were firing their pistols at the jeebees. I just had a longer range and better aim."

  I figured we were done here as he was not giving me any other presents or cartridges. I wondered how the engineer was getting along with Bradan. I could imagine them either being the best of friends or trying to see who the smarter one is. Perhaps it was both. I hadn't thought to see if Bradan could play any games, like poker or chess. I didn't bring anything with me to play them anyway. As if on cue, Bradan was coming down the path to the firing range.

  I asked him, "What are you doing here? I thought you were getting checked by the engineer?"

  SERVICING COMPLETED

  "How do you feel?"

  I AM OKAY

  "You sound better. I barely heard you coming."

  ALL SYSTEMS WORKING

  "That is good because I was worried about you."

  I CARE ABOUT YOU TOO

  "How about the engineer?"

  HE IS EATING LUNCH

  "That is a good idea. Lead the way; I am quite lost. After that, we can go to the train station and I'll show you something wonderful."

  • June 9

  When I awoke Friday morning, I thought about the ride to London. I'd be the only unmarried woman on a train full of soldiers. Sure, it was going to be a long skirt today. My mother would be so proud. Plus, I will not be getting it dirty again just sitting on the train.

  As usual, Bradan was waiting outside for me. I was getting used to him being with me and found it hard to imagine him being anywhere else. We grabbed a quick breakfast and walked to the train station where our train awaited. I noticed that several passenger cars had been added before the brake van. The soldiers were running around and the Colonel was giving orders.

  He said, "Good Morning, Miss Kelly"

  I replied, "A very good morning to you too!"

  "Albert! Show the lady and her automaton to their rail car. I hope you don't mind that I'll be sharing it with you."

  "I feel honoured. May I ask why?"

  "I just received orders to report to headquarters by the fastest means available. They have re-evaluated the situation and determined that the railway gun is a target for enemy attack. I intend to make it a well-defended and fast moving target."

  I had to stop and think for a minute. When I started out, I was going to shoot targets. Now, I was going to be a target. I wasn't sure the trip was worth it. I had agreed to help, but that was when I thought it would be a safe ride. It's too late to get another ride, but the Colonel said the train would be defended. I guess that means us too.

  Yesterday, I expected to ride to London in a dirty boxcar that had been used for the cavalry and their horses. The one we were escorted to was still a freight car, but was clean and had two rows of padded seats at the front facing each other. At the back was
a desk and chair, undoubtedly for Colonel Reynolds. I guess they had left the centre open so Bradan could get in easily and his smokestack could be close to the centre vent.

  There were maps mounted on the walls. I took a quick look at them. The route we would travel and the stops where the train would bring on water and coal were marked in red.

  The Colonel boarded a few minutes later. "To reiterate, your job is to warn me of any G.B.H.I.s. It is important that you give me as much warning as you can in case we need to stop the train. Do you understand that?"

  "Sure, I understand."

  YES

  This was my first ride on a train so I wasn't prepared for the initial lurch. It was a nice ride after that. The rail-car swayed slightly from side to side, but there weren't any jolts like riding in a carriage. I could get accustomed to travelling like this. The sounds of the steam pushing the pistons and the wheels rolling over the cracks of the rails were comforting.

  The Colonel looked up from his papers. "You don't need to stay here. I can read what your automaton discovers. You can see more from the cars behind us. The scenery is quite nice along this route. You might even make some new friends amongst the soldiers and their families."

  The passenger cars were filled with happy people conversing with each other. Did they think they were just on a weekend trip to the big city or had the Colonel told them what might happen. A couple invited me to sit with them a while. The Colonel was right when he said that the passenger cars had a better view.

  I moved along the car, talking to people. One soldier had a harmonica and I told him how I would sing when Bevin played her concertina. He said that they are similar instruments and offered to play if I would sing.

  I asked him, "Do you know this song?

  Kiss me quick and go my honey,

  Kiss me quick and go;

  To cheat surprise and prying eyes,

  Why kiss me quick and go!"[iii]

  He knew that one and several other songs that I knew and it wasn't long before the whole car joined in on the choruses. I went back to the boxcar a few hours later as my voice was getting hoarse. Lieutenants Mills and Reed were inspecting Bradan.

  "Good morning, Miss. We were just checking the craftsmanship on your automaton. It is a fine piece of machinery you have."

  "I'm sure he appreciates your kind words... Gentlemen, I've been wondering. What kind of bullets did you use to get the target to explode?"

  "We don't use bullets; we prefer to call them mortar shells."

  "What are those?"

  "Usually they are big round bombs. The Yanks used ones about a foot in diameter. Coincidently, they also fired them from railway cars. They were designed to go over obstacles and drop onto the target before exploding. However, the ones we are using here are almost like your rifle cartridges."

  "My cartridges don't make things explode."

  "Actually, your cartridges do explode, but it is contained within the barrel and propels the bullet to the target. Our shells, on the other hand, are propelled by the gun and explode on impact."

  "I'm still confused."

  "Imagine that we turn your cartridge around and put the bullet on top of the cap and seal the end where it was. Then we fire the entire cartridge with the bullet in the front. When the bullet hits the target, the cap fires, and the cartridge explodes into many pieces."

  "No wonder the wooden target ended up as slivers"

  The Colonel looked up from his papers and the men seemed a bit nervous. Lieutenant Mills said, "It was nice talking with you, Miss. We need to be at our post when we arrive at the next station."

  I sat down to think about what he had said. This gun was not like a normal cannon which did massive damage, but was difficult to aim and slow to fire. This did less damage, but could be fired quickly and accurately. I guessed that was a good thing. If it wasn't, why would they have built it?

  The Colonel said, "We are coming up on a 20-minute stop. If you need to refresh yourself, the station can accommodate your needs. When we resume our trip, Albert will serve lunch."

  I asked, "What about the soldiers? Will Albert be making their lunch as well?"

  "Of course not. The families usually pack a lunch and the single men have standard rations plus water. It is enough to last them until we reach London."

  "I tried one of those rations yesterday; Fluid beef and chocolate. The chocolate bar was wonderful. The beef was not. However, if you use mutton, onions, and potatoes instead, you will have good Irish stew."

  So far, this was a wonderful trip. Lunch was good. Albert said he cooked it using the engine's boiler. We resumed our journey on schedule. I was getting accustomed to the way the train started moving and was not worried about spilling anything on my dress. At this rate, we would arrive in London in less than an hour.

  Albert and I spent some time talking; just the usual conversation about home and family. I wondered if Bradan's legs ever got tired as he was always standing. The Colonel glanced at me after checking his maps. He did not look pleased.

  "Coming up is the last water stop and we haven't discovered a single G.B.H.I. I was expecting to find several camps of them along this route. This next stop is just before we enter the city limits. There have not been any reported sightings of G.B.H.I.s close to a city. It looks like your job is almost complete."

  That was fine with me. I could go the rest of my life without seeing another one of those disgusting creatures. I was sure that Bradan felt the same way. I looked over at him and was astonished by what was shown.

  EXTREME DANGER

  I said, "Unfortunately Colonel, you seem to be mistaken. Bradan, where are they?"

  EAST 3000 YARDS

  The Colonel checked his maps and said, "That puts them just past the station. Albert! Have the engineer stop just out of eyesight of the station and we will deploy the troops before continuing on at walking speed."

  Albert ran out, leaving the three of us.

  The Colonel continued, "As for you two, your work is done. When the fighting starts, find someplace safe to hide. If the fighting ends and we are all dead, head East to London, have a constable take you to headquarters, and tell them what to expect."

  The Colonel headed to the passenger cars and I followed at a discreet distance to hear what he had to say.

  He waited to get their attention then said, "Well men, it appears we have work to do before we can enjoy the weekend. Grab a weapon then form up in front of the engine when it slows."

  I wondered if that included me. I wasn't in a hurry to join a war though. I went back to our rail car to prepare. In it was a crate with my name on it, likely enough ammunition for the tournament. Perhaps there was enough for a major battle too if used sparingly.

  The Colonel expected the attack to happen at the station; it didn't. The jeebees waited for us to leave the station before they attacked. Their tactics hadn't changed, just their numbers. I would guess 50 of them were running at the train from the left side. They were firing their pistols as they came at us, but not really aiming at anyone or anything. The next wave was the same, but came from the right side. The Colonel directed his men like a conductor would his orchestra and the attackers were quickly dispatched.

  After those were killed by the soldiers, a few dozen came at us from both sides at once. This time they had metal shields and were actually aiming their guns at the soldiers. The first groups must have been trying to get us to use all our bullets. They might have succeeded if we hadn't been expecting an attack.

  I heard the Colonel giving orders to the men. "Men with rifles! Line up here double file facing opposite directions. Unlike standard training, I want you to fire one at a time starting at the front. When the last one has fired, the first man should have reloaded and be ready to fire again. Keep them from getting to the train at all costs."

  At the time, I thought I was insane. We were safe inside, out of sight of both attackers and defenders. I was planning on joining the battle. I doubted one more rifle would ma
ke any difference, but it just might.

  "Bradan, we need to be somewhere we can do some good. Can you carry the case of cartridges?"

  YES

  "Good. Let's get out of here!"

  I opened the door on the right side of the boxcar and we jumped out. Bradan looked silly jumping as his leg joints are so rigid. I decided it would be better for us if we went towards the front of the train and the railway gun. Lieutenants Mills and Reed were sheltering behind the gun firing their pistols. Lieutenant Reed looked in our direction for a second.

  "How can I help?" I asked.

  "Shoot the jeebees who are shooting at us. Teach them not to stick their heads out. Shield yourself behind that tall crate and please keep your head down when reloading. Colonel Reynolds will bust me to private if I let anything happen to you."

  "We can't have that now. I will be careful."

  I was thinking that I could fire a dozen cartridges; it would provide more practice for the tournament. These jeebees had large metal shields, but I had a better angle to them than the soldiers.

  I asked the Lieutenants, "Why aren't you using the railway gun?"

  "We had to wait until we came to a complete stop to change the power couplings. The steam engine cannot run both the train and the gun at the same time."

  A jeebee dropped to the ground as I shot it. I figured I could be useful here and be better prepared to compete tomorrow. That first shot got the attention of the others though and they angled their shields towards me. This also made me a possible target.

  I heard a sound, much too loud and too low pitched to be a rifle. Then I saw a small object going upwards in the distance. Shortly, there were more flying objects and more sounds. Lieutenant Reed had the telescope trained on them.

  He said, "These ones can fly. I think the other jeebees are firing them out of cannons at us."

  I set my rifle telescope so I could see them. Two arms were holding wings and two arms held their version of a rifle. One leg had some kind of fin on it while the other two braced it. I tried to shoot one of these flying jeebees several times with no visible effect. I was sure that I hit it at least once.