Lean on Me (The Mackay Sisters)

by Verdenius, Angela

  He nodded, leaning back against the kitchen bench to watch Lori get up and lead Harriet out into the hallway. He listened to their voices disappear. The minutes ticked past and he wondered what on earth they could possibly have to talk about outside. Cripes, it was just out to the car, surely they’d said all they had to say for now?

  Suddenly aware that he was impatiently tapping his foot, he stopped. Hmmm, Tommy had been here. Why? And why was Harriet turning up after the argument or whatever they’d had in the park? There was no blood, no overturned furniture, just two empty cups. No tears or shouting. Sitting and having a cuppa. Odd.

  The door opening and shutting sounded followed by Lori’s footsteps which grew slower, hesitating near the doorway before she finally entered.

  That hesitation wasn’t something Matt liked, it meant she was nervous around him. Good nerves or bad nerves? Now that was a cause for his anxiety. What if she didn’t want him here? He’d gone off in his dominant mode after ordering her to be here tonight. He certainly hadn’t thought of how she’d felt, only himself.

  Shit.

  Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath. This was no time for strutting around enjoying his conquest - though secretly he did enjoy it - he had to be more sensitive to her needs.

  Opening his eyes, he watched as she entered the kitchen, tracking her as she crossed to the table and picked up the cups, taking them to the sink and filling them with water. Turning the water off, she remained where she was, looking down into the sink before finally turning to face him.

  Well, she faced him but her gaze was fixed on his chin.

  He eyed her closely, wondering what she thought. When she didn’t say anything, he pushed away from the bench and walked over to her, slipping his arm around her waist and leaning down to brush a kiss on her forehead.

  Mmmm, she smelled sweet, soap and powder and scent. And Lori, yeah, she smelled like Lori. Shed taste as sweet as she smelled, too, he’d just bet.

  Hesitantly, her hands touched his shirt before fluttering away to hang by her sides.

  Hmmm. Okay. Releasing her, Matt stepped back. He was going too fast, he had to rein in his eagerness to touch and kiss her, taste her, do a hundred naughty things to her lush body.

  Time to bring calm, rational Matt to the fore.

  Taking a deep breath, he took another step back, putting some distance between them. When she still didn’t do anything except stand there and wring the living daylights out of her hands, he ordered softly, “Lori, look at me.”

  Her gaze flew up, her cheeks pink, but she didn’t look away. She did, however, worry that poor bottom lip with her small teeth.

  “Hi,” Matt said.

  “Um…hi?” Her gaze slid away from his eyes to stare at a spot on his nose.

  Not as easy as he’d thought. The only way now was to be frank. “Lori, did I hurt you this afternoon?”

  Those apple cheeks flushed red. “No.”

  “Was it good?”

  “Yes.” Cheeks redder, hands wringing more violent.

  Stepping forward, he grabbed those hands in his, pulling them away from each other.

  This time she did look up at him.

  “I’m not good at this,” he said quietly. “In fact, this is new to me.”

  There was a flash of disbelief in her eyes.

  “Okay, not sex. But sex with you…that’s new.” Shit, that was clumsy.

  “I’d say so,” she whispered a touch dryly.

  “I meant, the…” Aggression? No, not a good choice of word. Dominance? Probably not a good choice either. Fierceness? Uh-uh. Shit shit shit. Think, idiot. “I meant the…” He went blank.

  Shit, that had never happened before. Lots of firsts today.

  Was that a little gleam of amusement in her eyes? “Are you laughing at me, Mackay?”

  “No. I’ve just never - you know - seen you at a loss for words.”

  He grinned, relieved to have her talking. “I’m just trying not to scare you off.”

  “From what?” Even though her cheeks were fiery, her gaze was steady. “Sex isn’t scary. Apparently. Everyone does it.”

  Surprise, surprise. Shy Lori was a game little bird. He eyed her a little closer.

  “Except me,” she muttered, only to clear her throat. “Well, until now. This afternoon.”

  Call him an egotistical arse, but that made him immensely smug.

  Manfully pushing that smugness down, he concentrated on her. “Until this afternoon, I’ve never had such explosive, hot sex.”

  That caught her attention.

  He smiled. “Yeah, you about burned the soles of my boots off, love. You were so hot. For a virgin, you surprised me.”

  She stood stock still.

  He rubbed his thumbs across the backs of her hands. “Man, when you ripped off my shirt as hungrily as you did, it was the most amazing bloody thing. That I didn’t expect from you.”

  That had the complete opposite effect to what he expected. Instead of leaning into him, all sweet and shy and ready for more, she jerked her hands from his and backed away.

  Now what the hell had made her do that? Matt raised his eyebrows.

  “I don’t…” She started wringing her hands again. “I’m not…” When he continued to watch her curiously, she finished in a rush, “I’m sorry.”

  “Sorry? For what? The best sex of my life?”

  Now the scepticism was plain on her face. “You know.”

  “No, I don’t. What are you talking about?” When she started to back away, he stepped forward and grabbed one of her hands to bring her to a halt.

  Not answering, she looked away.

  “Talk to me, Lori.”

  No answer.

  “Please.”

  She shook her head.

  He eyed her speculatively. Why was she apologising, why was she embarrassed? At her continued silence, he sighed. “Look, love, I don’t play guessing games. You need to talk to me.”

  “It’s nothing.”

  “Bullshit.” He gave her hand a little shake. “Talk to me.” When she still refused, he narrowed his eyes. “If you don’t start talking to me, I’ll phone Ali.”

  That brought her head snapping back up in horror. “You wouldn’t!”

  “Try me.”

  Chapter 7

  She swallowed. “She doesn’t know anything, anyway. Go ahead.”

  “Oh ho. So something happened in the past.”

  “I’m not telling you. Just…I’m sorry for attacking you, all right?”

  “Attacking me?” He laughed. “Lori, I was attacking you just as much. What we did was to each other. In fact, I think we’re a perfect match.”

  “Really?”

  “Really? Are you kidding me? Every time I touched you, you responded. I kissed you, you kissed back. A novice you might be, but you burn hot as hell.” He stepped closer, liking the way she had to tip her head back to keep contact with his eyes. Liking the way he towered over her.

  Macho Man was his new second name. Who would have guessed?

  There was no denying the shy pleasure in her expression. “You really didn’t mind?”

  “How about we do it again right here, right now, just to prove it to you?” Yeah, that suggestion had merit. It was a bloody good one in his opinion. “Trust me, I’m more than willing.”

  Back came the blush, her cheeks going rosy.

  Laughing, he slid one arm around her to pull her against him, cupping one hot cheek in his hand. The contact of her breasts against him and the warmth of her body had the laughter fading just as quickly.

  Lori looked up at him. “Why?”

  “Why what?”

  “Why are you here, Matt?”

  “Seriously? You don’t know?”

  She shook her head, then stopped at his frown. “Okay. Maybe to apologise?”

  “Hell, no, I’m not apologising.”

  “So why?”

  “You really have to ask that?” Unbelievable. “I want you.”
>
  “Uh-huh.”

  Okay, not quite the response he was after. “Let me put it a little more bluntly-”

  “You can be blunter?”

  “Woman, you have a sharp tongue when you get shitty.”

  “I’m not shitty.”

  “You’re not exactly Miss Mary Sunshine right now, which surprises me.”

  She twisted out of his arm. “Maybe because the real me isn’t what you want.”

  “Oh, hang on there, missy.” Insulted at that comment, he grabbed her upper arm and jerked her back up against him.

  When she made to wriggle away, he caught her other arm and leaned down to glare into her eyes. Oh yeah, her expression was a touch mutinous.

  Interesting. He studied her. No doubt about it, she was hiding fear behind that anger, using it as a protective covering. Lori was carrying an emotional scar. “Who hurt you?”

  “What?” She stopped wriggling.

  “You’re carrying some baggage from the past.”

  “No I’m not.”

  “Yeah, you are.”

  “Will you let me go?”

  “Not until you talk to me.” When she looked away, he added, “For a woman, you don’t want to talk much.”

  “For a man, you want to talk too much.”

  “If I was a woman, I’d crush your stubbornness with tears. Maybe I’ll do it anyway.” This surprised a choked laugh out of her and he took advantage of it. “Come on, Lori, if there’s to be anything between us then you need to talk to me.”

  For a second he feared she’d continue to struggle and he’d really have to be stern. Instead, she looked up at him defiantly.

  Okay, that kicked off male satisfaction, especially when the caveman picked up his head in interest, but he beat down his baser instinct to enjoy a good struggle with her - and win, of course - and continued to watch her with determination. Come hell or high water, he was going to find out what bastard had scarred her in some way.

  “Tommy came earlier,” she stated brazenly.

  “Yeah.”

  “Are you going to start ranting, accusing me?”

  “No.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because you’ll tell me in your own sweet time.”

  “That he and I had it on?”

  “Christ, woman, keep pushing that at me and you won’t sit for a week.”

  Her nostrils flared in a pleasing show of feminine indignation. “So you do think we had it on.”

  “No, I don’t. I’m just grinding my teeth at the fact that you’re avoiding the question.”

  “So are you.”

  “No, I’m not.” Full marks for not getting as confused as he probably should have been by now.

  “So are you going to ask me why Tommy was here?”

  “I said it before and I’ll say it again. No.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I trust you.”

  That took the wind out of the little witch’s sails. She stared at him, opened her mouth, closed it, and repeated incredulously, “You trust me?”

  “I said so, didn’t I?”

  “Yes.”

  “So maybe it’s your turn to trust me.”

  “I do trust you.”

  “No, you don’t.”

  “Yes, I do.”

  Any sane man would be leaving teeth marks in the bench top by now, but Matt was made of sterner stuff. Plus he really wanted Lori, so he was prepared to wade through any kind of shit she threw at him.

  But it was time to stop the running in circles.

  “If you trusted me, Lori, you’d cut the shit and talk to me properly instead of trying to pick a fight.”

  “I’m not-”

  “If you even respected me a little, if you respected yourself, if you respected the truth, you’d know that you can trust me. You know you can.” He tightened his hold on her upper arms. “I’m not asking you again.”

  “Is that a threat?” she asked haughtily.

  “No.”

  Her laugh was disbelieving. “So if I don’t answer you, you won’t ask again?”

  “I won’t ask again.”

  “Ever?”

  “Ever.” At her look of relief, he added quietly, “And I’ll know that I’m mistaken. I’ll know that you’re not interested in a relationship with me, that you don’t respect me, and that you don’t trust me. I’ll walk out of here and that’s the last you’ll see of me.”

  Now she looked distressed. “Matt, I-”

  “No.” He shook his head. “I told you, I don’t play games, Lori. I don’t lie. The fact is that I want something more with you, but if we can’t get past whatever it is you’re scared of, then that’s it.”

  It was a bald-faced lie but she didn’t have to know that.

  Now she had tears in her eyes. “You really…you really want a relationship with me?”

  Refusing to soften, he looked down at her. “Yes.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I like you, I more than like you. I’ve watched you for months now, been your neighbour, chatted to you, and it’s only made me want to be with you more. Give us a chance, Lori, that’s all I ask.”

  Her head dipped down and he felt a shiver go through her before she raised her head and looked him directly in the eye. Damned if she wasn’t trembling a little, too.

  “How can you want me, Matt?”

  He frowned. “I don’t understand.”

  She held her hands out, palms up. “I’m not a slim woman, I’m not beautiful. I work at a servo with no real aspirations to do anymore right now. You could have your pick of the girls in town, why me?”

  “I don’t want the girls in town,” he replied bluntly. “I want you.”

  “Why? I’m nothing to look at.”

  And there it was, that self-consciousness in her eyes, that uncertainty. Sure, he could have given in to his instinct and cuddled her close, just gathered her into his arms and kissed her and reassured her, but that wasn’t what she need right now.

  No, right now he knew what she needed. “Ever heard the saying that the eyes are windows to the soul?”

  She nodded.

  “Do you believe it?”

  “Yes.”

  Leaning down, he rested his forehead against hers so that their eyes were inches apart and she could only look directly into his.

  “Lori, I’m not interested in bodies slim or voluptuous. I’m not interested in beautiful women or plain woman. I don’t care where they are on the career ladder, I don’t care if they’re rich or poor. There’s only one woman I care about and she’s right here in front of me.”

  She blinked nervously.

  He continued softly but firmly, “I’m only interested in you, Lori Mackay. Shy, sweet, with hidden depths to you. I know you’re no angel, I know you have a temper once it’s stirred. True, it takes a long time to do it.” He grinned crookedly. “But when it lets fly, no one is safe.”

  She bit her lip.

  “But that’s a part of you,” he continued. “I like it, just as I like it when you laugh, when you crack a joke, when you’re evasive, when you’re shy, when you’re everything you are. I like you. I respect you. I want you.”

  She swallowed, but he saw the flicker of hope in her eyes and it warmed him to his soul. “I’m not perfect.”

  “None of us are.”

  “One day you might see a better woman.”

  “One day you might see a better man.”

  Warmth swept through her eyes even as she answered shyly, “No one is better than you, Matt.”

  “And no one is better than you.”

  Those long lashes swept down to hide her eyes from his and he waited patiently. Finally they swept up again and this time the uncertainty was replaced with a flicker of a smile. “I’m not going to win this, am I?”

  “Hell, no.”

  “Okay.”

  “Okay?”

  “Okay.” And she kissed him. Shy, sweet, a lift of her body against him which he suppo
rted with his grip on her upper arms.

  Heat slipped through him at her response but he tried to hold back, to accept it as gently as it was given, even while his caveman reared his head and knocked on his brain to tell him to take over, to take her, to take control.

  This was for Lori, and for her he’d hold back.

  Shit, it was hard.

  When she finally lifted her mouth from his, he growled, “Confession time.”

  Bemused, she replied, “Huh?”

  “This time you kissed me.”

  Her cheeks coloured. “You didn’t like it? You seemed to like it. You said-”

  “I meant, I have this caveman thing going on when I’m around you.”

  “Caveman?”

  “Yeah. Whenever we’re together, I want total control. You kiss me and I want to kiss you back twice as hard and control it.” He frowned in turn. “That’s never happened before. But I’ll warn you now, don’t blame me when the caveman gets loose.”

  “Gets loose?” Her eyes widened.

  “Yeah. He’s the one who tears off your clothes, grabs you, kisses you and has his evil way with you. In case you didn’t notice, I seem to have a dominant side as well.”

  Now laughter crept into her eyes. “You don’t say.”

  “Yeah, I say.” He eyed her hungrily. “Right now the caveman and the dominant are fighting it out to see who’ll win.”

  “Which means…?”

  “Any second we’re going to be on the floor with you naked and under me.” He grinned, feeling exceedingly wolfish. “But it’s not my fault.”

  “It’s not?”

  “No, I’m actually mild mannered Matt Winters, and the Caveman and the Dominant are my evil alter-egos.”

  “I’m glad you warned me.” Her smile reached all the way to her sparkling eyes. “Are we capitalizing your alter-egos?”

  “I just did.” He knew his eyes gleamed, because he sure as hell felt the fire inside him. “They’re wanting a piece of a shy, sweet woman. That’s you.”

  “Wow.” She laughed outright, the lightness of it sluicing through him and calming his libido just a little.

  Not enough, just a little. But then she stopped laughing and looked at him, her expression growing serious. “Matt, I need to tell you something.”