NIGHT WIND'S WOMAN

by Sheri WhiteFeather

  Kelly followed Shane's mother down the hall and into the bedroom where the other woman often stayed. Although the furnishings were stark and masculine like the rest of the house, Grace's presence shone through. A colorful scarf was draped over a straight-back chair, and a tangle of jewelry glittered on a practical oak dresser.

  She opened the closet and removed an article of clothing. "It's a perfect blend of New Age and traditional. Don't you think?"

  Awed, Kelly studied the deerskin vest. A floral pattern of seed beads decorated the leather, lending traditional Indian appeal, whereas buttons made of semiprecious stones added modern flair. "It's incredible."

  "I thought so, too. Try it on, Kelly. I bought it for you."

  "Oh, my." She reached for the vest and held it against her. "I've never owned anything like this before."

  "Well, then it's time you did."

  Grace dug through a case of carefully packed necklaces while Kelly removed her blouse and slipped on the vest. Studying herself in the mirror, she smiled. The leather clung to her like a second skin, the buttery feel cool and sensual.

  Grace came up behind her. "Look at you." Slipping a choker around Kelly's neck, she fastened it and stepped back.

  Kelly touched the delicate necklace. It was stunning in its simplicity – deerskin with a single beaded flower.

  The other woman fluffed Kelly's hair, sending it flying wildly about her shoulders. "You're a very beautiful girl."

  "Thank you. This makes me feel beautiful."

  "Wear it at the fund-raiser," Grace said. "An artist like yourself should make a statement."

  Months ago Kelly wouldn't have thought of herself as an artist, but these days she did. Shane had driven into the city to pick up the gift-shop items that bore her drawings of Puma. Later this afternoon she would see her work exhibited on T-shirts, coffee cups and a commemorative poster.

  "Thank you so much, Grace."

  "You're welcome, honey."

  Kelly hugged Shane's mother, wishing she could reveal her heart. But how could she tell Grace Night Wind that she had fallen in love with Shane when she was still gathering the emotional courage to tell the man himself?

  * * *

  Kelly worked beside Shane in the gift shop, stocking shelves and setting up displays. He munched on red licorice while he unpacked a box of stuffed animals, and she eyed the strawberry-flavored candy with disciplined longing. The chips and guacamole had been enough junk for one day. As a nursing mother, Kelly thought it only fair to eat a mild, well-balanced diet, and candy and chili-spiced foods didn't fall under that category.

  Focusing on the stuffed toys instead, she grinned. She had convinced Shane to purchase them for the gift shop, and now that she saw their sweet, fluffy faces lined upon a shelf, she knew her instincts had been correct. What parent could resist them? Brianna adored the cougar Shane had given her; she curled up beside it every night. Maybe Brianna needed a toy tiger, too. And a leopard with a pink bow. A girl leopard, Kelly thought.

  Shane looked up and caught her planning her daughter's zoo instead of pinning T-shirts on a corkboard display wall. Of course she had already stared at the shirts with a sappy expression, marveling at her drawings, imagining them being worn by strangers.

  "Sorry. I'm being kind of lazy," she said.

  "No, you're not. You've been working nonstop for weeks. It's okay to get a little dreamy eyed."

  Dreamy eyed. If he only knew about her daydreams, the fantasies of love and commitment that involved him. "Those toys are awfully cute."

  "Yeah. We should get Sunshine one of each."

  Kelly's heart bumped against her chest. His we almost sounded like a commitment. How would he react if she told him how she felt about him?

  Maybe she should do it right now. Spill her soul. Let it pour out.

  She chewed her lip. Then again, maybe she should wait until after the fund-raiser. A few days after, when the stress levels associated with it lessened.

  "I wonder if Sunshine will get attached to a special blanket," Shane said, musing out loud. "Puma has one. Heck, he's still crazy about it."

  Kelly blinked, then stared for a moment, assessing his odd comment. Not about her daughter, of course. Children often acquired a fondness for a particular blanket or toy. But cougars? "Puma has a security blanket?"

  "Sort of, yeah. It's an old saddle pad he fell in love with at his original home. And when he came to live with me, it came with him."

  "What exactly does he do with it?" she asked, trying to picture a hundred-and-eighty pound cat dragging a security blanket behind him.

  "When he first moved into the cabin with me, it helped keep him calm. He would sit on it and tread, then nurse and purr like crazy. He'd pretty much stay wherever his sucky was placed."

  Kelly grinned. "His sucky?"

  Shane shrugged, then laughed a little. "I had to call it something. Besides, he made this sort of chewy-sucky noise when he nursed on it. The name seemed to fit."

  The more she heard about Puma, the more she adored him. "And how does he react to his sucky now that he's older and living outdoors?"

  "Covets it mostly. He keeps it hidden in his lockdown." Shane flashed a telling smile and leaned forward. "But when I wash it for him. sometimes I notice the corners are spit-soaked, like he still sucks on it once in a while."

  Kelly studied her lover's expression, the emotion she saw in his eyes, the same glittering pride that often shone for Brianna. "The relationship you have with him is amazing. The way you talk about him, he seems almost human."

  "But he's not," Shane responded, his voice serious. "We lived together successfully because Puma decided I was another cougar. A tall one who walked funny, I suppose. But a cat just the same." He picked up one of the stuffed animals and stroked it. "Most exotics either mark you as predator or prey. There's nothing in between. You're either one of them or you're not."

  And Shane Night Wind was definitely one of them, she thought. "Did he ever bite you?"

  "In the beginning, yeah. I was pretty much covered with bruises, but eventually he learned roughhousing wasn't acceptable. I suppose he thought I was a grump most of the time – this ugly cougar who never wanted to play." Shane met Kelly's gaze, then smiled. "He didn't give up easily, though. He was always trying to figure out ways to sneak in a bite."

  "How?" she asked, thoroughly charmed. If Shane was an ugly cougar, then a beautiful one didn't exist.

  "Sometimes when I was standing near him, he would yawn really big. Kind of nonchalant. You know, like it wouldn't be his fault if my arm just happened to fall into his mouth."

  Kelly couldn't help the spurt of laughter that erupted from her chest. Shane joined her in the merriment, and when their laughter faded, they stared at each other.

  A stare that intensified the longing in her heart.

  "We should get back to work," he said.

  "Can't we take a short break instead? Maybe visit with Puma?" Suddenly Kelly needed to be near the cougar, the animal that shared its medicine with Shane. "I'd go by myself, but I know you have strict rules about guests roaming the grounds unescorted." Although she had been permitted out there a few times by herself, on those occasions, she had studied Puma from an artistic standpoint. Today was spiritual. She wanted the cougar to see her and Shane together. Wanted Puma to know that they were lovers.

  Kelly pushed her hair away from her face. Was that possible? Would Puma sense a change in her relationship with Shane? Or was it wishful thinking on her part? A romantic notion that a wildcat would know the difference?

  "Sure," Shane said. "We can take a break."

  As they headed toward the compound, she slipped her fingers through his, giving in to the urge to keep him close. To her, even the simple act of holding hands strengthened their bond. It made them seem more like a couple. Two people who belonged together.

  What would he say when she told him that she loved him? Kelly glanced at his profile, that gorgeous angular face. Maybe he already knew. Shan
e had learned long ago how to read other people's emotions, tap into their energy field. He claimed he wasn't psychic, but he was gifted just the same.

  Kelly relaxed her grip. If he already knew, then there was no reason to worry, to cling too hard. Desperate women did desperate things, making doormats of themselves. Hadn't she done that with Jason? Let him abuse her affection? Well, she sure as hell wouldn't let him hurt Brianna. Jason Collier was going to treat his daughter with kindness and respect.

  When they reached Puma's habitat, Kelly stood back while Shane greeted the cougar through the metal fence. Shane would help her deal with Jason, wouldn't he?

  Of course he would, she decided with a slow, steady breath. A man like Shane would never abandon the needs of a child. Or the woman who loved him.

  She looked up to see Puma staring at her with that lone eye, his tawny frame crisscrossed by the security fence. She stepped forward and stood next to Shane, her concentration focused on the cat.

  "I wish I could touch him," she said softly.

  "I can't let you," Shane responded just as quietly.

  "I'm aware of that." But a part of her couldn't help but wonder if she would be considered friend or foe. Prey or predator.

  Puma moved closer to the edge of his enclosure as he let out a loud "oooow," and Kelly realized he had just said hello. Friend. It was the same greeting he had given Shane only moments ago. Excitement bubbled in her chest.

  "Hi," she said in return. "I'm Kelly. I'm the one who looked like I had a watermelon in my tummy. Only it was actually a baby. I named her Brianna."

  Clearly amused, Shane shot her a sideways glance. She smiled and looked back at Puma. The cat made a similar noise, only this one quieter, more personal.

  An odd feeling came over Kelly. She couldn't enter Puma's cage and she couldn't touch him, yet he seemed to be asking why she had come.

  To tell you that I'm in love with Shane, her mind answered. Puma assessed her with his eye, that one golden beam of light. Kelly shifted her feet. This was silly, she thought, expecting a cougar to carry on a telepathic conversation. She turned toward Shane, and as she did, Puma made another noise. Stunned, she turned back.

  This time the cat's throaty call sounded remarkably like a long, drawn-out "I knoooww."

  * * *

  The fund-raiser was in full swing, the smell of a deep-pit barbecue drifting through the air. The picnic area of the rescue bustled with activity as volunteers filled the serving table with side dishes and salad fixings. A party tent housed the art show and a large exhibitors' booth displayed cases of hand-crafted jewelry. The other temporary booths provided carnival-type games, offering family fun and novelty prizes. While a local band played country cover tunes, adults and kids alike strolled in and out of the gift shop, their Texas attire blending into the festive atmosphere.

  Shane couldn't have asked for a better turnout. Friends and neighbors lent their support as did the corporate sponsors and wealthy animal activists whose generosity helped make the rescue a thriving facility.

  Shane adjusted Brianna in her carrier. She rode like a backward kangaroo, her face resting against his chest, tufts of hair peeking out from the pouch. He had offered to baby-sit since Kelly manned the art show and he roamed the grounds, free to socialize, playing the role of the proper host, no matter how foreign it still felt to him.

  He scooped his arm around Brianna, balancing her in the carrier as one of his sponsors approached. Nelson Pickles stood a good foot shorter than Shane with thinning yellow hair and wire-rimmed glasses. Shane figured the quiet millionaire had been considered a nerd in his youth, thus his preference to animals over people.

  "Hello, Shane," Nelson said in his nasal twang, extending his hand. "It's good to see you."

  He shook the other man's hand. "You, too. I hope you're enjoying yourself." Their conversations were usually sparse. as neither forced the other to engage in party talk. Shane knew the drill. Nelson would stop by the fund-raiser, say hello, then send a sizeable donation the following week. Asking for money made Shane uneasy and he suspected Nelson understood his discomfort, even respected it. Their relationship might be unusual, but at least there was no pretense.

  "What do you have there?" Nelson asked, indicating the blue pouch.

  Shane removed the little girl from the carrier and adjusted her red-and-white gingham dress. Smiling, he said, "This is Brianna Lynn."

  Nelson studied the child curiously. "A human baby."

  Apparently Nelson had been hoping for a clinging monkey or a frisky cub. Shane supposed that was where he and the other man differed. Babies, no matter what their species or gender, pleased him. He delighted in having a daughter as much as he had enjoyed having a son.

  As soon as the weight of his last thought hit him, he agonized over the blunder, blinking back his pain. Brianna wasn't his daughter any more than Evan had been permitted to be his son.

  "I bought a painting," Nelson said.

  "You did?" Still struggling with his emotions, Shane placed Brianna against his shoulder so she could peer over it. She gurgled and grabbed hold of his hair, signaling her approval. She smelled soft, like lotion and powder – a gentle creature tucked in cotton, ribbon and lace. "I'm glad to hear it. This is the first time we've gotten the local galleries involved, so your patronage is certainly appreciated."

  "It's an interesting piece. Wildlife art has always been my favorite." The other man straightened his bolo tie and excused himself before their conversation faltered. "I think I'll go sample some of that barbecue, then be on my way."

  "Be sure to say hello to my dad. I know he'd like to see you."

  "Will do." The millionaire gave Brianna's shoe a quick pat and disappeared into the crowd.

  Shane shifted the baby, cradling her in his arms. She looked up at him and stared – that funny, perplexed gaze babies seemed to have down to a science. Her little eyebrows furrowed, and he grinned. "I guess you haven't quite figured me out yet, huh? Me or my friends."

  She studied his grin, kicked her feet, then smiled back at him, telling him she had figured him out just fine, even if the jury was still out on his friend.

  "Hey there!"

  Shane took a deep breath, preparing for twenty-questions as Brianna's head bobbed in the direction of the greeting. Barry Hunt, the bulbous-nosed owner of the One Stop Gas Station and Mini Mart lumbered toward them, a gossip-induced gleam in his eye. Another offbeat friend, he thought, wondering what Brianna would think of this one.

  "She's a cute little bug, ain't she?" Barry flashed his gold tooth. "'Course it's obvious she ain't yers. You with that dark skin and all, and her being pink-faced and blond."

  Great. Shane tried not to scowl. Just what he needed, another reminder that Brianna wasn't his. "I never claimed she was."

  "True, but everybody in town knows yer dating her mother."

  If everybody knew, it was because Barry had told them. Shane ran his fingers through Brianna's hair, the silky wisps of golden curls. Then again, he had taken Kelly out to dinner, kissed her in public, driven her to Dr. Lanigan's office. And in a small town like Duarte people were bound to notice "Kelly's a good friend."

  "How come the baby's father's ain't in the picture? He dead or something?"

  "No, he's just a fool." Lying to Barry wouldn't do any good and neither would avoiding his questions. Being evasive would only encourage the old codger to gossip even more.

  "Well, it's nice of you steppin' in like you have." Barry's white hair and full beard made him look a little like Santa Claus at a Texas hoedown. "I was raised in a boy's home. My mommy and daddy were both fools."

  Which meant, Shane assumed, that the old guy had been unwanted and unloved. Growing up tough and ornery might have been Barry's only defense. Faulting him for it now didn't seem fair. "Kelly's going home next week. I didn't step in forever."

  "Maybe you ought to," the old man said before he spotted Martha Higgins looking his way. "There's a lady waiting on me, son. I'll catch up with you
later."

  With a bounce in his stride, Barry made his way over to the widow Higgins, leaving Shane staring after him. Maybe you ought to. As if it was just that damn simple.

  Shane glanced down at Brianna and felt his heart tug. She stared up at him with those bright blue eyes. The baby who had chased away the storm. "You have a daddy, Sunshine," he whispered. "And it's only fair to give him a chance. I gave Tom a chance and he turned out to be a fine father."

  As Shane headed for the art show tent, he acknowledged his guests, clusters of people eating and drinking, their lives seeming carefree. At the moment, Shane's was anything but. Playing the proper host wasn't easy when losing Kelly and Brianna occupied his thoughts. But asking Kelly to become a permanent part of his life would be like signing his own emotional death warrant. Sooner or later Jason would enter the picture, and Shane would be pushed by the wayside.

  He carried Brianna into the tent and scanned the art-show arena for Kelly. Spotting her in the thick of things, he brought Brianna next to his face and nuzzled her cheek, inhaling her sweet baby scent. "There's your mommy." Looking like she was right where she belonged, in butter-soft deerskin and feminine jewels, surrounded by painters, gallery owners and patrons of the arts. Kelly had taken to the fund-raiser like a mermaid to the sea, fitting in eloquently with the money crowd. It wouldn't be long before Jason Collier saw this side of her, too. In no time, the Ohio heir would realize her potential as a social companion. A beautiful, young society wife. The mother of his child.

  Shane kissed Brianna's cheek, the pain almost too much to bear. As he approached Kelly, the baby made a happy crowing sound and flapped her arms, excited to see Mommy.

  "Hi." She greeted them both with a radiant expression, reaching for her daughter. Brianna bobbed her head and bumped Kelly's nose, making Kelly laugh and kiss her – a sweet smacking kiss right on the lips. The little girl blew bubbles and gurgled, then smiled that chubby baby smile, the one that dimpled her chin even more.

  Shane knew that in another month Brianna's smile would turn to a broad grin, then soon after that, laughter. Her sensory and motor skills would continue to develop, but he wouldn't be there to see any of it. Brianna Lynn would grow up without him.