Ghostly Manners

by K. E. O'Connor

  “She isn’t powerful. The worst she’ll be able to do is turn the lights on and off in the bedroom all night. I’ve had that happen before; that’s why I always use a sleep mask over my eyes.”

  “But what if she was murdered?” persisted Helen. “Don’t you think we have a duty to help her?”

  “Help her how?” I asked. “We don’t know the first thing about investigating a murder. We don’t even know when it happened, if it happened at all. She could have died a hundred years ago. Evidence will be sorely lacking if that’s the case.”

  “We don’t need to know the techniques,” said Helen. “We just need to find out who she is and how she died.”

  “Maybe tomorrow,” I said. “First, we need to get through a fancy dinner with the family.”

  Chapter 5

  The ornate grandfather clock in the hallway chimed seven o’clock with lusty vigor as I hurried down the stairs with Helen and Flipper.

  I’d showered and changed when I’d gotten back to the house, and had deliberately not dwelled on the fact I’d met a grumpy middle-aged ghost in the garden who’d tried to convince me of her untimely demise.

  Ghosts could be found anywhere there were large concentrations of energy. The most popular places were hospitals. No surprise really, given the number of deaths that happened in a hospital. More surprisingly, I’d discovered ghosts in nightclubs and bars. It seemed all that happy, slightly drunk, hedonistic energy was a real draw for ghosts.

  The door to one of the parlors opened, and Lord Galbraith walked through. He was dressed for dinner in a dark grey linen suit, with a bright red cravat and matching pocket handkerchief. He smiled when he noticed me, Helen and Flipper descending the stairs.

  “Good evening, ladies and gent.” He inclined his head towards Flipper. “We have been having drinks in the parlor. I should have invited you along, too. But I thought you would like some time to explore on your own and settle in prior to dinner.”

  “Thank you, Lord Galbraith,” I said. “I think we are all settled in now.”

  “That is excellent news.” Lord Galbraith turned and extended his arm. “Allow me to introduce you to my wife, Lady Penelope Galbraith.”

  A tall, stick insect thin woman emerged from the parlor, swathed in a burgundy silk dress, a long black scarf looped around her neck, pearls on her wrist, and a large diamond ring on her wedding ring finger.

  “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Lady Galbraith.” I always had the urge to curtsy before the lady of the household. Sometimes, I’d even been expected to, but it was rarer these days to curtsy, unless you were in the presence of royalty. And that had happened.

  The look Lady Galbraith gave me made it clear what she thought of the plain black knee length dress I had put on for dinner. “Sylvester tells me you are to be his new personal assistant.”

  “That’s correct,” I said to her. “And I’d be happy to assist you with any administrative matters you may have as well.”

  Lady Galbraith gave a short nod, her gaze shifting to Helen. “And you must be my seamstress.”

  “At your disposal.” Helen dipped her head.

  “I have five dresses requiring alteration,” said Lady Galbraith. “I will expect you in my room at six tomorrow morning to begin altering the hems.”

  Helen did an excellent job of hiding her grimace. Early mornings were not her thing. “I will be happy to help.”

  Two men crashed through the door behind Lord and Lady Galbraith, both clasping half full glasses of wine.

  “This is my cousin, Douglas Galbraith.” Lord Galbraith gestured to a tall man in a crumpled black suit jacket and trousers, several buttons of his pink shirt undone, revealing tufts of dark chest hair.

  “Pleased to meet you,” Helen and I said together.

  “The new help,” said Douglas, a feral smile crossing his face as his gaze ran over our figures. “Prettier than the last lot.”

  “Douglas, behave yourself,” said Lady Galbraith, shards of ice lacing her words.

  “I have some paperwork of my own that requires filing.” Douglas leaned forward and tugged a strand of my dark hair, his muddy brown gaze intent upon me.

  “She will be too busy with our requirements to deal with your paperwork,” said Lady Galbraith.

  “I’m sure she will be able to squeeze me in,” said Douglas.

  Lady Galbraith shot me a dark look. “Make sure you don’t, my dear.”

  Lord Galbraith chuckled and slapped Douglas on the back. “He’s only having some fun. Now, allow me to introduce you to my old friend, Doctor Cecil Masters.”

  Cecil wiped his chubby right hand on the side of his black slacks and stuck it out to be shaken. “A pleasure to meet you, ladies.” He was short and rotund, with round glasses perched on a small snub nose, and piggy eyes that blinked too rapidly as if the light from the chandelier overhead was too bright.

  We both shook hands with Cecil, and I resisted the urge to grimace as I felt how clammy his hand was.

  “Shall we get settled in the dining hall?” asked Lord Galbraith. “We have quite a spread tonight in honor of our new staff members.” He led the way along the wood paneled hall and through the door to the dining hall.

  “No dogs allowed.” Lady Galbraith’s gaze went to Flipper, who had remained by my side during the introductions.

  “He is very well-behaved,” I said. “He won’t beg food from anybody’s plate. You won’t even know he is in there.”

  “Yes, I will. It is out of the question,” said Lady Galbraith. “When I heard you had a dog with you, I insisted Sylvester find somebody else to do your job. When he explained your... disability to me, I took pity on you. But that only goes so far. No animals in the dining hall.” She turned on her black kitten heels and stalked away.

  “Stay calm,” murmured Helen.

  I bit the inside of my mouth. “I'm trying, but I'm not disabled. I don't need her pity, and I'd much rather eat with Flipper than her. He probably has better table manners. I'd like to tell her where to stick her stupid rules.”

  “This isn't worth losing your job over,” whispered Helen. “And I get the impression Lady Galbraith is quick to take offence. Flipper won't mind staying out here for a little while.”

  I knew Helen was right. “Go ahead, I'll find somewhere for him to sit.” Taking a deep breath, I looked down at Flipper. Seeing his bright blue eyes gazing up at me instantly made me feel better. “Sorry, boy. You’ll have to stay out here. But I promise you, I’ll sneak some food into a napkin, and you can have it later.” I scratched behind his ears a few times before moving him to the corner in the hallway and settling him down.

  By the time I’d gotten into the dining hall, people had already piled their plates with food and were sitting at the table. I grabbed a plate from the large sideboard, took a selection of vegetables and pasta from the array of pungent smelling dishes, and hurried to join them.

  Helen sat to the left of Lord Galbraith. The seat opposite her was empty, so I sat there.

  “Well, this is a lovely party.” Lord Galbraith smiled at each guest in turn. “I do enjoy having extra people around the table. Sometimes it seems too large, especially when it is only Penelope and me dining alone.” He looked towards the other end of the table, where Lady Galbraith sat on her own, aloof and disengaged from the rest of us as she picked over a few salad leaves on her otherwise empty plate. I could see now why she was so thin if she survived on lettuce leaves and bad vibes.

  “Yes, it is jolly nice to have such pretty guests at the table.” Cecil blinked a few times before tucking into the fish on his plate. “Where have you ladies come from?”

  “A little village outside of Oxfordshire,” I said. “But I travel around a lot, and Helen too. We’ve worked all over Europe.”

  “Sounds a lot like how I spend my time.” Douglas took a large glug of wine. “You’ll often find me at some villa in France or by the pool enjoying the Italian sunshine. Do you ever get to Italy?” His gaze rested to me
.

  “I’ve been there a few times,” I said. “It’s a beautiful country.”

  “They do make excellent wine.” Douglas emptied his wine glass and filled it again.

  “And are you lovely ladies both spoken for?” Cecil dropped a piece of potato into his lap and scooped it up with his stubby fingers.

  I gritted my teeth and smiled. “We are very much married to work. And I have my dog, Flipper. He takes up a lot of my time.”

  “Why on earth would you call an animal Flipper?” asked Douglas. “Unless it’s a dolphin.”

  “He does this trick,” said Helen. “When he really wants a piece of food, he sits back on his hind legs and claps his front paws together like a seal. Lorna didn’t even need to train him to do it. When she found him, he did it the very first day he was in the flat. So, that was his name from then on.”

  “And because of his coloring,” I said. “In a certain light, his fur looks blue, just like a dolphin.”

  “Funniest name I’ve ever heard for a dog,” said Douglas. “I’ve got a few hunting dogs out back. I don’t bother with names for them. They’ve got numbers I had tattooed in their ears. Makes it easier to identify them. Plus, if any of them get injured or old, it’s easier to send them off to the old meat factory. You don’t get attached to a number.”

  I swallowed the sick feeling creeping up my throat. Anyone who could do something so barbaric to an animal would never be a friend of mine.

  Lord Galbraith cleared his throat. “Now, I wanted to run through your basic duties, Miss Shadow. You will attend to my administrative requirements. That will be your main duty. I will require you on a daily basis to take down dictation, type letters, and have them mailed out. There will also be my emails to check and reply to. Most of those are simply junk messages. I prefer to do the majority of my business by letter. I find a letter is much more personal.”

  Douglas pulled out a smart phone from his jacket pocket and dumped it on the table. “You need to get with the times. Get one of these, and your life will change forever.”

  Ignoring Douglas, I smiled warmly at Lord Galbraith. “I’m happy to deal with all of your correspondence, letters, and emails. What else will you need me to do?”

  “My filing system requires some serious rejuvenation,” said Lord Galbraith. “I had two girls here over the last five years, and they both had their own style of filing. One did first name and subject, the other did surname and geographical area. Neither worked. So the system is a mess. I will need you to set up something clear and easy for me to use when you are not here.”

  “I can do that,” I said.

  “And I hear there are some wonderful tools that can be used to remind one of significant anniversaries or important dates, such as birthdays. Do you know of such a thing?”

  “Of course,” I said. “I can set you up an event schedule, so you get alerts of upcoming events and key anniversaries.”

  “That would be ideal,” said Lord Galbraith, lowering his voice and leaning towards me. “I recently had my wrists slapped by my dear wife for forgetting our wedding anniversary. She didn't speak to me for three weeks. Don’t want to go through the silent treatment again.”

  Looking at the way Lady Galbraith sat apart from the group, it didn’t surprise me at all that she used the silent treatment as her weapon of choice. The air felt positively chilly every time I looked at her.

  “I can get that set up for you,” I said. “You will never miss another birthday or anniversary again.”

  Lord Galbraith nodded. “And as for your duties, Miss Holliday, I’m afraid I don’t know anything about laundry work or sewing. But you will be working with my dear wife. I know she has a number of dresses she is eager to have taken in. She is always losing weight. I tell her to eat, but food doesn’t seem to interest her. Her only passion in life are those wretched books.”

  “Anything you need altering or adjusting,” said Helen, “you just let me know. I can tailor a suit if you need one and am always here if you require a button sewing on or a zipper that needs to be changed.”

  “I’ve got a faulty zipper on this pair of trousers,” said Douglas. “Can you take a look at it later tonight?”

  Helen opened her mouth to speak, but I shook my head at her sharply. We’d only have to tolerate Douglas’s comments through tonight’s dinner and then we could avoid him. The guy was a rude drunk.

  “Now, Douglas,” said Lord Galbraith quietly. “These ladies do not need to be bothered by you. They are here to do my work.”

  “But they are both single, and neither of them are bad looking,” said Douglas. “I thought they’d be grateful for some attention. A couple of single girls, scraping by, doing sewing and typing. Must be a dreadfully dull life. I’d be happy to show either of you some excitement while you’re here. Or both of you if you’d be open to that.”

  Spotting a large oil painting of a grand looking man in a red cloak, I decided to change the subject. “Is that a family member?” I indicated to the painting.

  “Yes, my great-grandfather.” Lord Galbraith looked at the painting. “I mentioned him to you when you first arrived. He purchased this manor house and spent many years renovating it. It is all thanks to his hard work and careful investments that we are here today. If it weren’t for him, the entire building would most likely have been bulldozed many years ago or turned into some sort of hippy squat.”

  “And the lady in the picture next to him?” I asked. “Is that his wife?” A narrow faced woman with upright posture and dark hair stared down at us.

  “Well spotted,” said Lord Galbraith. “Yes, she is the mother of five children. Two of them survived to adulthood. One of them was my grandfather. He carried on the family tradition at Galbraith Manor, as did my father.” Lord Galbraith gestured to another painting on the wall, showing a man who looked so startlingly like Lord Galbraith I did a double take.

  Lord Galbraith noticed my expression and laughed. “Yes, we could pass as twins, rather than father and son.”

  “And what about the lady on the opposite wall?” asked Helen. “Is she a family member?”

  I pivoted in my seat to see the painting Helen referred to. My knife fell out of my hand as I stared at the portrait. It was our ghost.

  Chapter 6

  “Is everything alright my dear?” Lord Galbraith scooped up my knife and placed it on the table.

  “Yes, everything’s fine,” I said swiftly. “Who’s that lady in the painting?”

  “Ah, my poor dear sister, Beatrice. Sadly, she is no longer with us.” Lord Galbraith lowered his gaze to his empty plate and set his knife and fork side-by-side in a neat silver pair.

  I looked over at Helen and raised my eyebrows. “Did she pass recently?”

  “Three years ago,” said Lord Galbraith. “She lived here with us. Never married, quiet little thing. But never any trouble. I rather liked having her around.”

  “Sylvester, we do not talk about your sister,” said Lady Galbraith.

  “My dear, the girls are simply curious,” said Lord Galbraith.

  “It is not appropriate to speak of the dead,” said Lady Galbraith. “You girls do not need to know everything about our family history. It is of no relevance to your situations here.”

  “They will want to know she died here.” Douglas’s words slurred as his sleazy gaze rested on my chest.

  “Douglas! Do be quiet,” snapped Lady Galbraith.

  “Your sister died in this house?” I kept my focus on Lord Galbraith, feeling the dagger like stare from his wife.

  “She did,” said Lord Galbraith. “Her heart gave out on her, and she was found dead in the garden.”

  That would explain why her ghost was lurking about under an oak tree in the grounds. “She can’t have been all that old when she died.”

  “She was no age,” said Lord Galbraith. “My younger sister. No one even realised she had a weak heart.”

  “I looked after Beatrice for most of her life,” said Cec
il. “And I didn’t detect any problems with her heart. It was one of those conditions that simply went undetected. It’s rare, but it does happen.”

  “Until she dropped dead from it,” said Douglas. “That gave the game away.”

  “Well, yes, but you know what I mean.” Cecil blinked several times. “Beatrice always seemed in excellent health. She never smoked and only drank at Christmas. She was a sweet lady. It was a tragedy what happened to her.”

  A blast of cold air shot across my face, and I gulped down a squeak of surprise. The chandelier over the dining table flickered on and off several times before Beatrice appeared, standing behind her brother’s chair, a deep scowl upon her face as she glared at the back of his head.

  I heard the muted sounds of Flipper scratching at the door to be let in. He would be frantic knowing I was in the room with a ghost. I jumped up and grabbed my empty plate. “Let me clear for you,” I said to Lord Galbraith.

  “That’s not necessary,” said Lord Galbraith. “We can leave the plates on the side, and the catering staff will come and collect them later.”

  “I want to. Since it’s my first night here, it would be good to feel useful.” I scurried around collecting empty plates, keeping an eye on Beatrice to see what she might do next. From the look on her face, it wouldn’t be good. The glare she still shot Lord Galbraith was not one of a kindly sibling.

  Helen joined me in the plate collection task, narrowly avoiding the clutching fingers of Douglas as she collected his cutlery.

  “Thank you for a lovely dinner, Lord and Lady Galbraith.” I held a pile of dirty plates in my hands. “We will take these to the kitchen.”

  “You would be most welcome to join us in the parlor for coffee and brandy,” said Lord Galbraith. “Do not feel you have to hide away in your rooms when you are not working. We want you to feel a part of this family.”

  “Within reason,” said Lady Galbraith.

  “That's a kind offer,” I said. “But I expect we will have a busy day coming up and need an early night so we are ready for work tomorrow.”

  “Very good,” said Lord Galbraith. “I will bid you both a good night and see you tomorrow.”