Corbin’s nails are now digging hard enough into my thighs to draw blood. The pain keeps me from shedding a tear for the hell my real parents had put me through.
“My dad grabbed me by the front of my dress, lifting me into the air and started punching me. I tried to explain myself, telling him how sorry I was for my mistake and yet all he cared about were appearances. He accused me of being out “fucking that Finley boy” and what a slut I looked like in the dress he didn’t remember buying me. I had left my jacket behind in my mad dash to get home. Mr. Finley walked to my house that evening and witnessed the horrible beating my dad was giving me.”
I dig my fingers into his scalp, and he pushes his head further into my hands. That brings me out of my misty haze.
“The next thing I knew, the screen door was being ripped from its hinges, Bruce was yelling for him to put me down, and then they started fighting. You would have been proud, Corbin. Bruce beat my dad bloody, picked me up, and I never saw either of my parents again.”
I let out a breath from the relief of retelling that agonizing story. Corbin’s assault on my thighs ceases. He engulfs me with his strong muscle-bound arms, and the tight grip he has around me makes me feel safe and secure. I let out a whimper and let the tears I had been holding in flow out and down my face.
Corbin’s face is down nuzzled in my lap; one arm is underneath my butt, and the other is resting on top of my legs. He never once looks up at me, and I’m grateful to him for that. It makes it that much easier to get through my ugly, painful story. I want him to know so he can understand me a little more. What Troy has done is hurtful, but is nothing compared to the years of abuse and pain I had been subjected to by my father.
Anyone I have ever loved brings pain upon me, until the Finley’s. I would be lying if I weren’t afraid he will do the same over time, but the truth is I know Corbin is hiding a past full of darkness, too. I see the same torment shadowed in the depths of his eyes, recognizing it instantly as the same pain that lingers beneath my own. I feel him tense up around me. I place my hand on his arm and rub, trying to help loosen his tension. The hard flex of his muscles, bounce and move against my hand.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Kennedy
I now understand Corbin more as he starts to open up about his family. The more time we spend together, the fewer anxiety attacks I have. Opening up to him is doing wonders for me. Maybe I should have tried talking with Justeen and Jagger years ago. I think the reason I never did is they are my haven, the one place I know without a doubt, I’m safe. My relationship with them keeps the pain at bay, even though it always finds me. I refuse to break my safety net, no way, no how.
My sister asks me to help her deliver some meals to the Olympic Center. Corbin ordered a ton of freshly cooked meals to advertise and give out as samples. He is trying to drum up more business for Justeen and raise awareness of how important healthy nutrition is to your workouts and progress. She will also be meeting and discussing her meal plans and her programs with everyone. It worked for me, and my sister is amazing at her job. Hell, she looks like a living, breathing Sports Barbie. I laugh when I think about it. If it weren’t for her, I probably would still be thirty-five pounds overweight - or worse - and would never have let Corbin come near me. I walk into the center alongside my sister, and she pre-warned me on the way over about how the guys will flirt and may say vulgar comments.
“Try to ignore them. They act like little boys with no manners,” she gives me one last reminder before we step inside.
I take in the sight of everything going on around me. To my right, there are two boxing rings, and behind it is a large caged looking ring. Punching bags line the back wall, and that’s when I feel the pull in my stomach clench down hard - the same sensation I feel every time he’s near. I look around trying to spot him, and there he is punching away, smack dab in the middle of the floor where the bags line up. He moves with such grace, yet he hits with such force and determination.
He’s wearing a black tank, which is soaked in sweat and clings to his every move, with matching black basketball shorts. Every time he moves to punch the bag, sweat droplets fly around him, and as gross as it might be on anyone else, it makes me want to walk over to him and lick it off. He always has a faint scent of Irish Spring soap and some type of musk, but no matter what, he always smells freshly showered and looks downright edible. To my right, there are two guys jumping around, getting ready to box, and they both turn and look over in our direction as we pass. My sister bumps my shoulder.
“Come on, horn dog, keep moving.”
I follow her lead, walking across the mats to a small door in the back. Corbin turns his head in my direction, and the smile that spreads across his face is seriously something. Oh dear god, I love that smile. It’s his signature, panty-dropping, I-know-you-are-checking-out-my-goods smile, the smug bastard. His coach yells for him as he runs over in our direction.
“Coach, I got this, I’m taking a break.”
Coach Sanders looks over with disgust. I flush, and he comes over reaching for the bags I’m carrying. Taking them from me, he turns and walks into the room behind me. It’s a huge dining hall, big enough to hold about fifty people at once. To the left of the room is a prepping station, one of the largest stoves I have ever seen, several microwaves, and freezers line the complete right wall.
“Wow! This place just keeps getting bigger and bigger. It doesn’t look this big from the outside. I mean, I’ve been here a few times, and I didn’t even know this place exists!” I exclaim.
“Yeah, I know. That’s one of the things I love about this place. Everyone who enters here for the first time says the same thing,” Corbin chuckles.
“Over here, love birds,” Justeen teases.
Rolling my eyes I finish my walk over to the counter, and I start unloading the contents. Corbin scoops me up into his strong arms, puts his face into the crease of my neck, and inhales. I giggle.
“Put me down, Corbin.” I turn smacking his arm.
“Ouch, that hurt.”
“Yeah! Yeah! Tough guy, I know better.” I laugh out. Grabbing me by my arms, he pulls me to him and smashes his mouth against mine. I don’t think I will ever get used to kissing this man. He makes my heart race, my knees weak, and my panties soaking wet. He’s never kissed me in front of anyone before.
“Well! Well! Look at what we’ve got here,” I hear a male voice say.
Pulling away, Corbin smiles down at me.
“Fuck off, Riggs.”
“This must be who is responsible for having you in such an incredible mood lately. I can see why.”
Turning, I notice the death glare Corbin is giving this guy, Riggs. Riggs walks behind us and over in Justeen’s direction. I watch as Justeen flushes, the smile that follows is something I have never witnessed before, and when he places his arms around her and kisses her neck, I look on in utter shock.
“What in the hell?” I ask in confusion.
This guy is a fighter, too; something my sister is totally against in dating. He isn’t as tall as Corbin, but he is just as muscular. His arms and shoulders look like a sculpted tree trunks. Where Corbin’s hair is shaved the same length all over, Riggs’ is styled with product into a long faux-hawk. He is good looking, even with the visible scars that I’m sure are from years of fighting.
“Oh, don’t look so shocked, Kennedy,” Justeen says.
“Riggs, this is my sister, Kennedy. Kennedy, this is Riggs.”
I walk the short distance and stick out my hand. Taking his, I say, “Nice to meet you, Riggs. Sorry, I seem so shocked, but my sister hasn’t uttered a word to me she’s seeing anyone.”
“It’s still new, horn ball,” Justeen says.
Riggs snorts and laughs out, as does Corbin.
“Horn ball?” Corbin asks, turning to face me.
“If you haven’t noticed, my sister always eye fucks you anytime you are in the room. You can’t talk either, Nash; you do the same thing to
her,” Justeen says in amusement. “I doubt you’ve even had a chance to notice since you haven’t been around lately, Kennedy.”
“I would have if my sister bothered to mention it to me, Trojan queen.”
She drops the melon in her hand and then tosses the knife on the counter, coming over towards me, while the guys are in hysterics laughing at us.
“T-Trojan Queen? Did she just call you Trojan Queen, Justeen?” Riggs asks in a fit of laughter.
“Ha ha, laugh it up, chuckles.” Stopping in front of me, she stands there eyeballing me.
“Have anything else to say there, Mrs. Funny Bags?” she questions.
“Not unless you do, Mrs. Jokes-a-lot.”
“Nope,” she says with a look of okay you got me.
“Okay, one of you has got to tell us how she got the name Trojan Queen,” Riggs says.
I laugh as Justeen turns back around placing her hand over my mouth. I lick the hand she places over my mouth, and she pulls it away laughing.
“Eww, you’re so gross, Ked.”
“Let’s just say my sister liked to experiment with condoms back in the day and leave it at that.”
“Am I staying with you when the boys go on tour soon?” Justeen asks.
“Fuck.” Corbin mutters under his breath. I turn, looking at him in question.
“What’s she talking about?”
“Oh, shit! I let the cat out of the bag before you had a chance to tell her. I’m so sorry, Corbin. I didn’t mean to spill the beans on you,” she says with a concerned look.
“It’s alright. I start touring soon, so that means I’ll be traveling around to get the points needed to qualify for the championship title fight in August. I was going to talk to you about it tonight. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I didn’t know how to bring it up. I also don’t want to leave you right now, after everything you’ve been through,” he says.
Fear shoots through me as I wonder what will happen between us now that he’s going to be gone.
“Come with me, so we can talk about this, please.”
Taking my hand, he intertwines our fingers together and walks me out and down a long hallway to a room I recognize as his private locker room.
“I’m sorry you had to find out this way. I had every intention of telling you; it just wasn’t the right time. You are still healing, and I have a few things I still want to teach you before I go like some important self-defense moves and how to shoot my gun.”
“You have a gun? Please, tell me it’s not anywhere Ashlynn can find it?” I ask in concern.
“No, it’s locked away in my safe. I want you to feel completely secure when I take off. I need to know you can take care of yourself, Kennedy,” he confesses.
“I’m going to worry, but I think if I show you these maneuvers, it will relieve some of the stress of worrying over you as much. You can understand that, right?”
I nod wondering if I can do this.
Corbin has only recently shown me a few basic techniques in self-defense, and he is right in thinking it will help me feel safer and more confident. I was so nervous at first, questioning whether or not I could do this and how I would handle it if anyone attacked me again. Now, my mind is filling with thoughts of him being so far away; we have gotten so close, and I know I will miss him dearly. Worry tightens in my gut knowing he is leaving and that Troy is still out there somewhere. My mind races with so many questions: What does this mean for us? Will I still even be a part of his life? Will he keep in contact with Ashlynn and me? Will he stay faithful to me?
He unlocks the door, and we walk inside his locker room, and I sit on the bench to my left.
“Spill it, Boss. I see your hamster wheels turning.”
I take a moment to collect my thoughts and try not to come off as a whiny girlfriend.
“What does this mean for us?”
I immediately look down and am surrounded with fear. He walks over and stands directly in front of me.
“Kennedy, look at me, babe.”
I slowly raise my head meeting his eyes. The intense look he’s sporting is very intimidating.
“I want to keep seeing you if that’s what you’re wondering. I hope you want that, too. We will take this one day at a time and see how this goes.”
I smile and feel a little relief, but time will tell, I guess.
“Do you have some time or do you need to pick up Ashlynn?”
“I have some time. Why? What’s up?”
“I want to show you a few more self-defense moves today, is that okay? I need to show you how to take someone down.
“I’m not dressed for this today.”
“You have shorts on under that skirt?”
“Yes, and the fact you know that is kind of scary.”
“You have been living with me, and I do pay attention to what you wear. I have a t-shirt you can throw on.”
“Oh you do, do ya.” I laugh.
I watch him walk over, open up a long locker to our right, grab a t-shirt, and toss it over to me. I take off my floral blouse and bring his shirt over my head. I lower my skirt and hear the growl that escapes from Corbin. I look up and see him watching me intently with such hunger visible in his eyes.
“I think I changed my mind. I don’t want you out there with all those eyes on you in that.” He motions up and down.
“What? What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” I look down at myself.
“Those guys out there might be a bunch of horny boys, Corbin, but I’m sure they’re not stupid. They will know the moment we step inside the ring together I only have eyes for you. Now, come on, playboy. Move that ass.”
As I step into the ring, I feel the eyes circling us focus solely on me.
“Let’s hope what I’m about to show you, you never have to use on me,” he says with a flirty wink.
Laughing, he moves right as I go to slap him. He is so good at reading me, and I’m not able to keep a poker face around him yet. I will master it one day, and he won’t know what hit him. I smile like I know something he doesn’t.
“What are you up to, little grasshopper?”
I laugh out loud.
“You’ll never know.”
“Oh really? Two can play at that game.”
He picks me up and throws me over his shoulders, and I laugh and kick my legs as he grabs them tighter and smacks me hard across the ass. The sensation of the sting of his slap makes my core tighten and clinch. Pushing my thighs together, he places my feet on the ground. I look up and stare in awe of him.
“Did I do something wrong?” I stand there as I start to come undone. What he does to me should be against the law, and it’s so unfair. Reaching out his hand, he pushes a few loose strands of my hair back behind my ear.
“Did I hurt you?” he asks.
Raising my eyebrow, I let him think something is wrong. Looking over his shoulder, he notices people are watching us, and I see the redhead girl again, whom I have seen a few times now, always following his every move. Oh, I’m going to give you a show, girlie. Grabbing him by the front of his shirt, I pull him into me as I reach up on my tippy toes and smash my lips to his. He picks me up, and I moan into his mouth swinging my legs up and around his waist. He pulls away.
“If you’re trying to distract me, it’s working. Let’s get started horn dog,” he laughs.
The nerve of this guy but damn he looks so yummy. I raise my eyebrow and plot rotten for my next move.
“Let’s go. I don’t have all day.” I act offended.
He comes around and explains what I need to do. I try it out and don’t take him down like he said I would. Instead, I fall flat on my ass.
“I guess you’re not as good of a teacher as you thought.”
He reaches down to help me up and pulls me flush against him.
“Let’s try it again. Focus, babe.”
I swing around but this time I do exactly as I was told. My eyes go wide in shock seeing him come down, falling towards th
e ground. The smile on his face is one of pure joy. I hear the sounds of clapping that follows.
“I knew you could do it. I’m so proud of you, babe.”
“I have to say I’m proud of myself. That was fucking awesome.”
He gives me a look one of thirst it’s followed by the soft tussle of his fingers weaving through my hair. He gathers my ponytail forcing my head back and brushes his lips gingerly over mine. I push my body against his to get as close as I can. He lifts me my legs go directly around his waist, and I’m heaving with the beat of my heart. I’m so fucked from the friction of his hips grinding as they line perfectly against my piercing; I come crying out into his mouth and shiver. I hear the catcalls and cheers behind us. He pulls away, and my eyes are pinched tight. When I finally open them the knowing gleam in Corbin’s eyes is my trophy.
“We are done for today. Hold on, boss.”
He walks us towards the men’s locker rooms. We don’t stop there; we head straight for his private door. He opens it, slamming the door behind us.
"I'm so embarrassed. I can't believe I had an orgasm right there in front of everyone."
He laughs.
"It was the hottest fucking thing I've ever seen. Don't be embarrassed. I bet no one even noticed."
"Yeah right. I bet someone did with as many eyes that were on us."
He placed me on my feet, and I change the subject.
“Why do you have a private locker room?” I question.
“I’m not sure you’ll want to hear this. I had a problem with girls sneaking into the public locker room, so Coach thought this room would be better suited. Plus, I can stay focused easier. I like to be alone to think before I go out into the ring or cage, and I can just sit in here and meditate. I know that probably sounds like a pussy thing to do but--”
I cut him off.
“No, not at all. Makes perfect sense, I find meditating helps me to start off my day on a positive note.”
Crushing Misery Page 16