“Wait, what?” he questions.
Laughing I shake my head back and forth.
“You’re not the only one who meditates, Corbin. It helps me with my anxiety, and I try to fit it in every morning. I get up before Ashlynn wakes up so I can focus. The counselor I see introduced me to it.”
“But you are never up before six a.m.?”
I smile big feeling the blush run up my face.
“Yes, I am. I even beat you up sometimes. I still have nightmares that wake me in the middle of the night or early in the morning. I even meditate after I have a nightmare to get my anxiety back under control. Since I’ve been here with you, I haven’t been having as many anxiety attacks.”
Looking up I stare straight into his eyes as I finish, “I feel safe with you, and sharing my past with you has lifted some of that anxiety. I don’t know what it is - your whole fighter, caveman, and I-will-protect-you ways - but I feel completely comfortable around you.”
Grabbing me by my ponytail, he wraps my hair around his fingers and kisses me with such hunger, it’s like he’s trying to express his feeling for me through his kiss. I reach around his waist, placing my hand gently along the rim of his shorts and slide them down, releasing his growing erection. Corbin’s juicy cock looks as mighty as the rest of him. Dropping down in front of him to my knees, I look up at the devilish man who has stolen my heart and see his smoldering eyes upon me. I take his length, and fisting it with my palm, I stroke over his silky flesh, feeling every ridge and pulsating vein along the way.
I dart out my tongue, tasting the salty drop along the tip and glide my tongue around, slipping my mouth all the way around, his thick, hot cock. He jerks forward, driving his entire rod further into my mouth until it hits the back of my throat.
“Awe, fuck!” he hisses out. “That feels so good. God, you’re beautiful.”
Looking down at me, something passes between us, and I see it within the depths of his eyes. He forcefully pulls away in what I can only imagine as panic and pulls up his shorts and turns, bolting straight out the door.
What the hell just happened? I just sit numb staring after him in panic. I feel moisture against my cheeks. I realize I’m crying. Getting myself together, I dial my sister’s cell.
“Hello.”
“Hey, Justeen, umm, a-are you at the training center… still?” I sniffle
“No, I ran out to pick up a couple things I forgot. What’s going on?” she says, concern etched in her voice.
“I’ll explain when you get here. I’m in the back, in Corbin’s private room. P-please let me know when you get here, and I’ll meet you outside, okay?”
“Yeah, okay, I’m not too far away. I’ll be right there.”
I walk over and take one of the water bottles sitting next to me, open it, and start drinking. My cell beeps so I look down, and there is a text message.
Sporty Spice: I’m here.
Kennedy: Be right out.
I walk through the center, feeling everyone’s eyes on me, and I hear them talking. I walk with my head cast down as fast as I can out the front door. I climb into my sister’s car; the pain stamped across my face.
“Thank you for coming back to get me,” I mumble.
“What’s going on?” Justeen questions.
“I don’t know. I was, well… shit. I was giving Corbin a blowjob in his room, and he looked down at me with such a beautiful expression on his face, but then that look turned into what I think was panic. If I had to guess, he has feelings for me, and I don’t think he wants to. Hell, I don’t want to either, but we have this visceral attraction… and something else… I don’t understand, Justeen.”
“Oh my God!” she screams out clapping and fist pumping her hand up in the air.
“What? What are you so damn happy about?” I giggle at her reaction.
“He’s fallen in love with you.”
“No way.” In disbelief, I look over at her like she’s a loon.
“Think about it, Kennedy. He’s a playboy who never has any relationships, and I don’t know if he ever has been in love before. He’s been so attached to you and Ashlynn, training constantly, and he probably hasn’t even had a chance to think about it. It probably just hit him like an iron fist. Who would have thought… Corbin Nash, falling in love with my hornball sister,” Justeen laughs.
“Do you think he has fallen for me? That he loves me?” I sigh.
“Yes, I do, babe. Why do you look so freaked out?” she questions.
Looking down in my lap, I take a minute to collect my thoughts.
“I’m not anything like the girls he is usually with. I’ve seen their pictures, and well, I’m not as thin or as pretty as those women. Those girls are gorgeous, where I’m just… Well… Umm… Ordinary looking.”
“What are you talking about, Kennedy? You are not ordinary at all. You are as unique as Pop’s old car you always had a hard on for.”
That gets a smile and giggle.
“You think so? My attire isn’t as trendy as those girls either. I mean really, Justeen, he’s far out of my league.”
“Kennedy, where those girls may be dressing in the latest styles and all, you have your own hobo chic panache. You are your own kind of beautiful, and you own it. That is something that sets you apart from any woman he has ever had his hands on and makes you even more rare. Where they are trendy, you are an exceptional gem.”
Her response gets my eyes filling with tears and me embracing her in a tight hug.
“I love you, Justeen! You are the best friend and sister I could have ever asked for.”
“I’m also the only sister and best friend you will ever have. Now get off me. People are going to start thinking we’re having a peep show going on here,” inciting a giggle from us both.
“Can you drop me off at Corbin’s, please? I think it’s time we sit down and have that talk.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Corbin
I know drinking in the middle of the day is wrong. But after the freak out I had - and the way I took off running from Kennedy - it is all I can do not to run out and do the first reckless thing that comes to mind. Something shifted between us at that moment, one minute I was looking down into her eyes and the next my heart burst. For so many years, love was absent and of all the times for this to hit me, it happens while her beautiful lips are wrapped tightly around my cock.
The feeling started the day I laid eyes on her, way back in high school. The awareness is undeniable, and I couldn’t ignore it if I tried. I have fallen hard for her. She is not only a sight of flawless beauty but after everything I’ve learned about her, she still has this incredible heart. A heart that cares for others, even after the rotten hand life has dealt her so far. How she still trusts people and loves with all her heart is beyond me.
She is everything I’m not, everything I wish I could be for her. Maybe she holds onto the hope that one day someone will be able to give her back exactly what she gives to others in return. Here I am, running away from the very person I want in every way, sitting here like a coward hiding in my fortress. A knock jolts me back to life. Getting up I try to get my bearings as I sway with each step, struggling to reach the front door. I pull it open, and Kennedy stands watching me with uncertainty. Concern fills her eyes, the very eyes I love to make grow bright with happiness, and darken when I make her cum around me.
“Hi, can I come in so we can talk?”
Pulling the door open wider, I move and gesture for her to come in. She surveys me, trying to gauge my mood, and I desperately wish she could read my thoughts. I’m so fucking confused. I’m in love with her, I know I am, yet I’m terrified I’ll hurt her - and then there is also Ashlynn, who I could hurt if things didn’t work out between us. That would kill me just as much, but I refuse to turn my back on her as her dad has done. I love that little girl.
I follow Kennedy as she sits on the sofa, and I stagger, plopping right next to her. I reach for the bottle on the floor, br
inging it up to my mouth as I take a big swig. It still burns but not like it did when I first started. She’s fidgeting with her hands.
“I came to see if you were okay and to let you know Ashlynn and I will be staying at my parents’ tonight. I came to get a few things we need and to say I’m sorry for how things got out of hand today.”
“Huh? What do you mean they got out of hand?”
“Well, you aren’t ready for whatever is happening between us, and my divorce isn’t finalized yet. I’m not saying what we are doing is wrong. We are human, and I know there is some weird connection between us.”
She sighs.
“I’d be lying to you and myself if I said I didn’t care deeply for you, Corbin. You have helped me find the strength by teaching me to defend myself if I ever find myself in another situation where I need to. That has given me so much confidence in myself I hadn’t realized I lost.”
“Kennedy, I have so much to say to you.” Running my hand over my short hair, down my face I just… Fuck it!
I’m going to tell her my story. Opening myself up is the one thing I have left to give her, and that’s exactly what I’m about to do. It might break me open, and I may lose it, but I know she needs to hear this. Dropping back the last gulp of Tequila I look straight ahead.
“I lost my best friend when I was eight years old to a fucking monster. We met up every Sunday after church to go adventure in the greenbelt behind our houses. I didn’t listen to my mom the night before and hadn’t finished my chores like I was supposed to. I was running late but knew he would still be waiting there for me when I arrived an hour late. When I got to our usual meeting spot, Landry wasn’t there, but his Garbage Pail Kid card was. It was lying there staring up at me. Fear shot through my chest, and my heart raced with dread.
“I called out to him, but all I got in return was silence. I looked around in every direction and path I could; I knew this area like the back of my hand. This was our playground, where our friendship first started and grew into a brotherhood. He may not have been my brother by blood, but he was more to me than my own blood sister was. When I started walking through the brush, I was ready for him to jump out and try to scare me. I held on to the hope he was playing a game of hide and seek, but I knew even then I was wrong.”
Kennedy reaches out placing her hand on mine, gripping me so tightly it almost hurt.
“I walked down along the creek it had recently thawed out for this time of the year.”
Her nails are digging into my hand now.
“It was almost summer. I scanned the area, tall evergreens surrounded me casting shadows all around. The misting rain fell around me, making a blanket of moisture that intensified the smell of blackberries in the air. The hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention as I searched the area and spotted a red matchbox Mustang over to my right. It was the Mustang I had given him for Christmas. It was his dream car, a 1969 Mustang Fastback Boss 429.
“I called out to him again, following the path like Hansel and Gretel until I heard the crunch of branches looking over in that direction. I saw something move in the distance; it caught my attention. I stopped, frozen, just watching and listening. I finally started to move, walking slowly towards the movement, and as I got closer, I saw blood… so much blood. Moving his hand up as he tried to reach out to me was my best friend covered in blood. Finding my footing, I ran the rest of the way to him. Landry lay there in a pool of his own blood staring up at me. I asked him what happened. Moving his hand up, he clawed at my shirt. I bent down closer to him; he tried speaking, but his voice muffled as blood squirted and oozed out of his mouth. There was a huge gash across his neck.
“I took my jacket off and threw it to the side and ripped my shirt up over my head and placed it over the wound on his neck in hopes it would stop the bleeding. I had seen it done on the doctor shows my mother watched on TV. I told Landry to hold on, and I would go get help. Reaching out, he grabbed my arm and gently shook his head no. Tears blurred my vision as they fell from my eyes. It seemed that in a matter of seconds my shirt was soaked through with his blood. His grip was slowly loosening.
“I told him I was so sorry I wasn’t there to save him or help him. His hand fell away from my arm. We sat there staring at each other as my best friend slipped away from the depths of the living and started to fade away. I shook him as I watched his blue irises leach to black; I watched on as the life literally drain out of him. I lifted him, bringing him into my arms, and I remember how heavy he seemed. I sat there holding him to me, and I said my silent goodbye. Tears, so many tears, blurred my vision, and the agony that filled me was unbearable. I remember trying to gently place him down, but he fell with a thump. I turned, running as fast as I could, calling out as I went for help, pushing through the bushes and trees as they stuck and pierced my skin. I reached my yard screaming for help. My mom ran out the back door, her face paling from the sight of me. ‘Help Landry, Mom! He needs help!’ I yelled, and I dropped to my knees as my dad appeared behind her. The last thing I remember, I was staring into my mom’s glassy eyes as darkness consumed me.”
We sit there as I heave in large gasps of breath. I turn my head and look over at Kennedy, and her face shows so much pain and shock.
“I’m being fucking haunted by a ghost, and I don’t know how much more I can take. Landry is haunting the shit out of me.”
Wiping my hands down my face, I feel the tears I hadn’t realized were seeping out of my eyes.
“It’s making me fucking nuts… so… crazy… I feel like I’m going to snap,” I scream out.
Smack!
“What the fuck?” I look over at Kennedy with a shocked expression written across my face.
“Oh, gosh, Corbin! I’m so sorry.”
Holding her hand over her mouth, she peers at me. Grabbing me, she brings me in her arms and holds me tight to her and says, “Corbin, I’m so sorry. I’m here for you. I know you are tough, but let it go, feel everything that happened that day and let it all finally be released.”
I sit here in silence, stunned as I realize she actually fucking hit me. I know I needed it, and I think she knew it, too, and hell, I deserved it after running like I did from her. I start to lose it, shaking with rage. Taking in a deep breath, I push away and look over at her. She’s watching, waiting for me probably to pull my shit together. Her hand moves along my thigh, caressing it, and I instantly relax.
“I think the hardest part for me is they never caught his killer. It weighs heavily on me day in day out. You aren’t the only one who is screwed up, Kennedy, so am I. When Landry died, he took away a part of me I thought I would never get back. That is until you and Ashlynn came along. You are like a burst of sunshine lighting my path away from all this darkness. One minute I’m living in black and white, the next thing I know, everything’s as bright as the sun, with rainbows and shit. Thank you for sharing your story with me and for giving me the courage to tell you mine. You’ll never know how much knowing I’m not alone in this mess means to me.”
I let out a breath and feel the tears stream down my cheeks. I choke out, “I’ve never shared that story with anyone. Not even your brother knows this story. We moved away when my parents couldn’t stop me from acting out and getting into trouble all the time at school. I started fights with anyone and everyone, trying to mask the pain I felt. They thought taking me away from what happened might heal me. How my parents dealt with me, I don’t know. They tried getting me to talk to a counselor, but I have been so closed off since his death. So that’s why I got into fighting.”
I finally pull away chancing a glance in her direction. She is trying to be strong for me. I watch as a single tear slides down her cheek, and I notice she is shaking. She launches herself at me, bringing me so tight against her chest. I inhale, and the sweet, salty smell of her is intoxicating. I laugh as more tears fall, and I turn my face into her firm breasts. She giggles and smashes my face deeper into her cleavage.
Turning, I look
up into her eyes. “I need to move forward; I’m stuck in the past, and it’s not a place I want to be. It’s too much. My past is so dark, brutal, and all consuming. It’s eating me alive, and I have to break free. You’ve helped me, Kennedy. Helped me find the path I want to go down. Revisiting my past - as hard as it is - I’d rather it break me, than it keep me stuck where I am, never to move forward and keeping me from a future with you.”
“People’s lives usually don’t start out the disaster ours have, Corbin. We have to be stronger than those who have been blessed with a life we didn’t have. We have to push harder, try harder, and break through until we get our happily ever after in the end… holding onto hope that we will come out better… In hopes that the misery won’t always take over.”
“I’m glad I finally shared my story with you, Kennedy. Even as scary as it was, I’m glad I took a leap of faith and did it. It’s weird, but I feel lighter like a weight has been lifted that’s been weighing me down, holding this all inside for far too long.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Kennedy
I stay with Corbin through the night, but my minds made up, leaving him and my family is going to be the hardest thing I have ever done. I gently untangle myself from Corbin’s limbs, and head to the bathroom as tears start falling. The fear of knowing later today I will be heading away from him is killing me. The anxiety rises, and knowing the safeness I’ve felt during the short time we’ve been together is soon to be gone. I know the emptiness will soon replace those feelings of security.
Getting dressed, I peek out, looking over at his muscular figure facing away from me on the bed. I go straight to the dining room table; setting the letter down, I grab my stuff by the front door and walk out.
I drive fast to my parents. I run into the house, taking two stairs at a time to my room, and I grab a bag out of my closet and start pulling drawers open and tossing clothes in. I don’t have much here since I was staying at Corbin’s, but what I do have here, I’m taking with me. Mom walks into my room.
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