Soulless Wanderers: Soulless Wanderers Book 1
Page 19
The words hit Paxton like a knife to the heart. She was right, but he had to keep telling himself that it did no good to confess. It didn’t make the words sting any less or make the memory fade away. It was as fresh as seeing it for the first time. He was responsible for all those people dying. “Fine, you’re right. It’s my fault.”
“I fucking knew it.” Sherry slowly made it to her feet but leaned against the wall.
“If I had never gone to the camp, everyone would be fine. I didn’t do a good job looking out for anyone when we went to the hardware store and Ryan is dead. It’s my fault. If Luke hadn’t taken me in, he would still be alive. Things were better before that, I ju—”
“You’re lying!” Sherry screamed and charged at Paxton. She had a hammer in her hand and raised it up. Paxton quickly grabbed her hand and stopped it from coming down on him.
“Stop this. I didn’t mean for any of it to happen!” he yelled at her. She put her free hand up to his face and grabbed at his eye, pushing it in. Paxton screamed and grabbed her throat hard. She began to smack his face as the oxygen was cut off from his grip. “It’s my fault, alright! I took the car, I told Larry to leave. I left the wall open. I didn’t want any of it to happen, it just did!” he screamed the words at her face as it began to turn blue. Her smacks became weaker.
Sherry tried as best she could, but she was much smaller than Paxton. When his grip tightened, her face went blue and her hands went limp. There was no more fight in her, and her eyes rolled back in her head. Paxton felt the weight of her body in his arms completely drop. He looked in her eyes and saw nothing behind them. Completely lifeless. Completely soulless. He suddenly snapped out of it and loosened his grip and wrapped his arms around her back.
“Sherry, I didn’t mean- It wasn’t supposed—” He couldn’t get the words out and cried as he stared at the dead body he held. “I’m so sorry. You just- then I—” He laid her down on the floor as gently as he could and wiped the tears from his face. “This wasn’t how I planned it. None of it.”
He knew none of it mattered. The words were completely true, but they sounded so empty when he said them out loud. He turned, no longer able to look at the woman on the ground. The woman who was now dead because of him. This time, not just from his carelessness, but dead from his own hands. The sunlight began to show through the windows as the sun peeked out over the horizon.
He went to the car, not bothering to bring any food or even to grab the gun. He sat in the car, crying. Nobody was there to bother him. Nobody was there to accuse him. Nobody was there to comfort him. He was all alone. He turned the key in the ignition only to have it beep at him and sputter off. The car was out of gas.
He stepped out of the car and looked around. He began to laugh. The laughter grew louder, catching the attention of a pair of soulless across the street, but he didn’t care. He laughed harder and harder. All he could think about was how much gas was below his feet where he stood, but he had no way of getting it out into his car.
Paxton didn’t bother to close the car door as he trudged down the street.
25
It was time to leave.
Daniel had enough of Alan leading the group to who knows what up north. He wasn’t going to get killed because of that wannabe psychopath. He was close enough to his bunker that he could make it there on foot the rest of the way. It was only a few miles now.
The cold breeze whipped across his face as he sat, huddled with everyone else in the woods. When it got dark, Alan had the bright idea that they should all camp off the side of the road. Everyone decided to follow the guy with the gun, so that’s what they were doing. Daniel looked around in the darkness. It did seem relatively safe, for now. Hopefully they weren’t going to be ambushed by a horde of soulless in the middle of the night, or maybe a group of people looking for more than just supplies.
Daniel knew it wasn’t a good idea, but he wasn’t going to speak up. Better to not make waves and just leave. Sure, they should have put up some sort of security around them to alert if anyone was nearby. It was impossible to see through the forest in the dark. And sure, they shouldn’t have lit a fire to let everyone or thing of their location. But the way Daniel saw it was, let them get killed on their own. It wasn’t his problem anymore.
Most of the group had fallen asleep. It was just Courtney and Cole now.
“I think I’m gonna get some rest. Eden will probably wake up early and it’ll be best if I rest up before then.”
“Good night, Cole,” Courtney said with a smile. “That’s one special girl you have there.”
He nodded and laid down on top of the blankets they managed to keep in the car. Apparently, blankets weren’t at the top of the list to steal with a trunk full of guns. “What about you?” Daniel asked Courtney.
She turned to him and took a sip from her water bottle. “It is getting late. But I don’t know.”
Daniel nodded. Inside, he was screaming. As soon as she went to bed, he could be on his way. He stared at Alan, who was fast asleep, not a care in the world.
“You don’t approve, do you?” she asked.
“Approve? Of what?”
“Any of this. I can tell. You don’t like being out here in the dark, and I don’t think you are a big fan of Alan.”
He was becoming too transparent to people. “Maybe. But we seem safe enough.” He forced a smile.
“Whatever you say. I think there’s more to you than you let on, Danny.”
“You know what I think?”
“What’s that?”
“That it’s time for me to go to bed. You should too.” Daniel stood and brushed the dust off his pants. He took a spot next to the tree and leaned against it in the dark.
Courtney stood and went to an empty blanket. “You gonna sleep all the way over there? There’s plenty of room for two on this blanket.” She patted the spot next to her.
Inside, Daniel laughed. He was many things when it came to observing, but women, he was definitely lost with. He shook his head. “Maybe next time.”
She shrugged. “Suit yourself.”
He closed his eyes and waited. Feigning sleep was not the most pleasant thing to do, especially when he’d really like to sleep. But enough concentration and will, it’s not that difficult. When he was sure that enough time had passed for a reasonable person to fall asleep, he opened his eyes and looked around.
The fire was still burning, but it had dwindled down a little, which would help him on his exit. The less shadows he created, the less likely he was to wake anyone. Everyone breathed steadily and deep. They were all asleep.
Daniel got up slowly and stepped into the darkness. It was difficult to see, but he was careful not to step on any branches or twigs. The last thing he needed was a loud snap to alert everyone he was leaving. He looked back and saw they all still slept. He watched Alan, continuing to sleep and not have a care in the world.
Daniel felt it boiling in him. Was he really just going to run? Something was wrong with Alan, he knew that for sure. It was just too convenient that he caught up to the thieves and got a gun back. How had Daniel been hit in the face, but Alan had made it without a scratch when he was following Alan? None of it added up, but why did he care?
He cared because he couldn’t let Alan live. Sure, maybe Daniel had somewhat grown to like these people. He could admit they weren’t the worst people to be stuck with. They didn’t really annoy him, and they did save his life. Would it be the worst thing in the world to give them a leg up in this world?
Daniel took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He carefully walked back to the camp, again making sure he didn’t step on any twigs again. He focused on Alan and stood over him, watching the breaths pull in and out. He could feel the energy surging through him like he did just before he had someone on his table, waiting to die. The knife slid easily into his hand, the weight familiar and heavy. His lips were dry with anticipation.
Just before plunging the knife deep into Alan’s hear
t, he caught some movement in the corner of his eye. Daniel turned and took notice of Eden. Her eyes were wide open, watching Daniel. She didn’t look afraid and didn’t try to stop him or call attention to anything. She blinked twice and continued to lock her eyes on to the scene Daniel had created. He stared at her for a moment, knife still pointed down at Alan, just waiting. Could he still do this?
He didn’t have to anymore. His hesitation was just enough time for Cole to notice Eden was propped on her side and not asleep. His eyes went from his daughter, then straight to Daniel standing over Alan holding a giant knife. “Eden? Danny, what are you doing?”
That was enough to wake everyone up and snap Daniel out of his moment. Daniel turned, ready to plunge his knife down. When he did, Alan’s eyes were wide open, and he was smiling. Before the knife could meet flesh, Alan grabbed Daniel’s wrists and held his grip away. They struggled together as the shouts started from behind them.
“Is that Danny?”
“Danny, get off him!”
“What the hell is going on?”
He was so close, he could feel it. He tried to force his weight down on Alan, but the scrawny bastard was stronger than he looked. Alan tried rolling, but Daniel had the advantage. He wasn’t letting him get away from him now. Just when he thought he could get the job done, the arms wrapped around his waist and shoulders. Then a pair of hands around his neck.
The rest of the camp was stopping him. Jessica had grabbed his waist while Cole had his arms around his body at the shoulders. It was Courtney that was pulling his neck. He wasn’t what he considered a strong man, but he was determined. Still, the weight of three adults was no match for Daniel. He fell back to the ground, along with the others. They grabbed at his hands, stopping him from stabbing anyone around, although his intent was to only kill Alan. They didn’t know that or see Alan for what he was. This was not going to go down well.
“He’s going to get you all killed!” Daniel yelled, knowing it was no hope, but he had to do something. “It’s not me you should be worried about, it’s him!”
“You aren’t making any sense,” Cole said, still struggling to keep Daniel down.
Then he saw it. Alan’s face had never changed, even when Daniel was so close to killing him. He smiled the whole time. He stood over Daniel as the others still pinned him down. “I’m not gonna be that easy to kill,” Alan said, then turned away.
Daniel’s blood boiled inside. Not only did he not get away, but Alan still lived. He still got one over on Daniel. He lost it. “You motherfucker, you’re a piece of—”
Alan turned around, full force in a swing of a kick. His heavy boot met the side of Daniel’s face, and everything went black.
Daniel opened his eyes, things very hazy from earlier. It started to come back to him, and he moved his shoulders. He was sitting up against a wide tree, strapped to it with bungee cords and a little bit of rope. He looked down at it and struggled a little, with very little give in his bindings. It didn’t seem he was going anywhere right now. He rested his head against the tree, finding the humor in how he got to this point.
“We didn’t have much else to keep you snug.” Alan’s voice added to his current situation was like kicking a man when he was down. Daniel looked straight ahead and saw Alan sitting across from him. He looked around, not seeing any of the other members of the group.
“Where is everyone?”
“Don’t worry. I told them I’d watch you tonight. Nobody could stomach it much. After all, you had been a great help to the group. But turning on one of us like that.” He smiled and shook his head. “I was a little disappointed. You always seemed so calm and collected. You really lost your shit back there for a moment.”
Daniel shook his head. But Alan was right. He did lose it. That wasn’t who he was.
“They finally see you for what you are, don’t they? At least, just a little. It’s scary, isn’t it?” Alan was speaking as if he knew what Daniel was going through.
“Why don’t you let me out, and I’ll show them the whole thing?”
Alan smiled. “I’m sure you would, but I like it just here. Don’t worry, I’ll take good care of them all. You won’t be around for that, but just rest easy because nothing is going to happen to you, tonight at least.”
Alan laid down, his back facing away from Daniel. He could see the fire cast long shadows from behind him where the group must be. He struggled a little and could force the makeshift binding only a little. He wasn’t going anywhere tonight. Watching Alan’s back, Daniel imagined the stupid smile plastered to his face, laughing at him.
26
Paxton kept walking. His pace didn’t start off fast, and it definitely hadn’t gotten any faster. It had been a little over an hour, and he was tired. His smile had faded long ago, and the memories crept back into his mind. Each step just drilled everything in a little bit deeper. The heat was getting to him, even though the sun wasn’t fully out and it wasn’t quite summer yet.
He took a step to the corner of the road where he was and he saw the street sign. Val Vista. Holy shit. Val Vista. He knew the freeway was just north of him. That meant- Yes, that meant he was maybe one mile away from his neighborhood. He picked up his pace and brought it to a jog.
His feet hit the pavement faster and faster with each step. Soon, his jog became a run. He ignored any thirst that was burning in his throat, and the hunger that grumbled in his stomach. There was too much at stake to worry about anything as simple as that. He had to find his wife. He had to know.
The minutes went by, the muscles in his stomach cramped up, and he was at the edge of his neighborhood. The nearby bar and grill was on the corner, obviously not as lively as it usually was. He stopped and bent over. It finally caught up to him, the lack of water, food, and exercise. He took quick, shallow breaths trying to catch up. The pain pinched his side, and he grabbed it, trying to massage it down.
“Fuck, I wish I had exercised before all of this.”
He paced in a quick circle as his breathing slowed down and he took deeper breaths. Finally, he was able to get back to it. He walked through the parking lot of the restaurant and turned the corner to the street that led into his neighborhood. He set his mind to it and ran straight into it.
He made it past the restaurant. He made it past the opening walls to his neighborhood and could see the houses. They all looked similar, as was usual in this city. Hell, this state, even. He had always hated the houses here, as nice as they were, they were all the damn same. Still, he was so grateful to see his own cookie cutter neighborhood standing. That is, until his eyes met what was in front of him.
A horde.
This horde wasn’t quite the size of the one he had encountered in Luke’s neighborhood, but it was still large enough to fill the road. As one person trying to cut across, there was no way he was making it past all of it. But he was so close. His house was two blocks down, take a left and the fourth house on the right. There was no way this little horde was going to stop him now. He had to find a way around it.
Paxton turned, determination covering up any grief, guilt, or second guessing. Then he saw it. Somehow, in his earlier determination, he had missed it all. But it was there, it had to have been. There was a second horde, lurking behind the walls to the neighborhood, that he somehow passed without alerting. He could no longer see the entrance to the neighborhood. It was completely blocked with the soulless.
“Jesus Christ.”
That was no prayer. It was his big Oh Shit moment. How was he going to get out of this? He frantically looked around for an answer. Anything at all.
Nothing was coming to him.
Lord, please help me. Please show me the way.
He prayed in his head. Nothing came. He ran to the closest house, but the horde followed him, blocking the front entrance. He ran to the side of the house, only to be met with the second horde. They converged, blocking him completely in. It reminded him of when this whole apocalypse started. All the way back a
t the beginning.
He dropped to his knees, knowing this was it. “Lord! Why?” He cried out. He thought about everything he had been through. All the trials and tribulations it took for him to get to this moment, just blocks away from his wife. Was this his punishment for what happened to Luke and the others? Was this for what he did to Sherry?
Paxton looked up at the sun. That wasn’t the God he knew. He was loving and forgiving. Then he thought about it. Stacey had to be dead. That was it. There was no way he could have come this far just to be stopped now. This was a mercy killing.
Tears rolled down Paxton’s face, finally at peace with his fate. His faith was restored in the Lord, letting him have the drive to get here, but not wanting him to suffer any longer. He was finally seeing the bigger picture that God had laid out for him. He was sad, but also happy. It was all going to be okay. It had to be.
A scream echoed down the street, over the horde and filled Paxton’s ears. It was so familiar. As the horde swarmed around him, he tried to understand where it was coming from. It was difficult to decipher it over the moving, wandering bodies. Their lips smacking and teeth chomping. The moans and groans from the dead covered almost everything. But then it came again. This time a little more distinct. A little more familiar.
It was Stacey.
Stacey was alive? This was his sign? This moment? After he had been broken and ready to die? He looked up from his tear-filled eyes and saw no out. It didn’t matter to him anymore. Stacey was alive, and he was going to get to her, or he was going to be eaten while trying, but he wasn’t giving up.
Once on his feet, he grabbed the nearest soulless, her hair long but clotted with mud. He had no idea what her story was and didn’t give two shits about it. He pushed her into the crowd of soulless behind her, creating a large opening into the crowd. Her mouth was chomping, but he kept his hands at her throat, much like he had done to Sherry. He quickly pushed that thought from his mind and focused on the horde.