by Emma Easter
She saw a guy seated at the back of the building waving his hand at her. She sighed with relief when she saw it was Jude, but nervousness replaced her concern. Taking a deep breath, she told herself to calm down. She squared her shoulders and walked over to his table.
He smiled broadly as she reached him and stood up quickly to pull a chair out for her. She sat down, amused. She was pretty certain that most people here did not pull out chairs for ladies. But she had to admit to herself that she was impressed. That was another point for him. He was handsome and now she knew he was also a gentleman. Or maybe he was just trying to impress her because of what he wanted from her. Hopefully, he would not expect the same from her.
A waitress dressed in a bright green outfit came to take their order. Sofia was in no mood to eat, especially not in a fast food restaurant with all the grease and fat.
“Do you have a salad?” she asked.
“What kind of salad?”
“The healthy kind!” she said, and then decided not to be rude. The waitress didn’t deserve that. “Sorry. Any kind of salad you have will do.”
The waitress scribbled on her pad and looked at Jude. A bright smile appeared on her face, and there was a glint in her eyes. Sofia smiled, slightly amused. This waitress liked Jude. Sofia could see it in the girl’s eyes. She turned to study Jude as he reeled out his order to the waitress. He had short cropped jet-black hair and a chin strap beard, very neatly trimmed. His dark brown skin shone, and his lips were so full that, for a brief moment, she imagined kissing them. She immediately brushed away the image from her mind and forced a smile when he turned back to her.
“So, Sofia, it’s great to see you again,” he said in a foreign accent that sounded like he was singing in his deep baritone rather than talking. She smiled slightly as he continued. “I know this arrangement is strange, but even if it’s just a business arrangement as you reminded me two days ago, it would be great if we could both try to give it our best shot.”
She sighed and said, “Definitely.” Two days ago, when they’d first met, she’d been trying hard not to freak out. It was after the meeting was over that she realized she’d been rude, but it had taken everything in her to come out to Edith’s living room and meet him. Now, she had mostly decided to go through with this process and, just as he’d said, give it her best shot. It wasn’t like she had any other choice.
“I am glad,” he said. “We will go our separate ways once this is all over, but it doesn’t mean we can’t try to be friends… or at least friendly.” He smiled. “Especially since we need to get to know each other really well.”
She nodded. “I’m open to getting to know you better,” she said. “I know your name is Jude, but what is your last name? I hope it’s a good last name if I’m going to be taking it… at least temporarily.”
Jude’s mouth fell open, and he did not speak for a long moment. She pressed her lips together so as not to laugh. He finally spoke. “You’re going to take my surname?”
“I might. Just to make the marriage more convincing to the immigration agents during our time together.”
He smiled again. “Well, I don’t know if you’ll be able to pronounce it, but it’s Shadamaraciah.”
“What?” She stared at him.
He laughed out loud. “Okay, that’s not my surname. I just wanted to see what your reaction would be. It’s a boring English surname. Daniels.”
“Daniels is easy enough.” She smiled.
He laughed at her reaction. “Many people in my country have English surnames, and first names as well. Mostly biblical names.” He tilted his head toward her. “So, what’s yours?” He looked away from her when the waitress arrived with their food. They both began to eat, and then he looked at her again. “You still haven’t told me what your last name is,” he said, taking a bite of his cheeseburger.
She couldn’t help studying him as he ate. When he raised his brows quizzically, she said, “Ross.”
“Ross,” he repeated in his deep accented voice. Her heart skipped a beat, and she frowned in confusion. She quickly put her away her emotions and said, “What country are you from, Jude?”
“Bakali,” he said to her.
She shook her head. “I’ve never heard of that country before.”
“It’s a really small African country. I’m not surprised you haven’t heard of it. Many people haven’t. What actually surprised me was that when I first came to America, I found out that many Americans did not know some of the more well-known African countries. I have come across people here who think that Africa is a country.”
He laughed again, and she chuckled. “Well at least I know that it is a continent.”
He began to tell her about his country, and the more he did, the more she felt sorry for him. When he told her about the escalating violence there, she almost took his hand just to comfort him. She had never really looked past her small world. Yes, she and George had gone on multiple trips abroad, but it was usually to exotic locations. Even when they’d gone to any developing nations, they’d stayed in the best hotels and resorts.
He told her about his father, who had been somewhat well off and had sent him to school in America for his Masters degree. He had paid the tuition fees, but unfortunately, he’d passed away in Jude’s final year.
“I’m so sorry,” she said to him. “It must have been hard when he died.”
“Yes. I had to get a work permit so I could meet my daily needs. Thankfully, I had paid for my tuition. The plan was for me to go back to my country immediately after my Masters program, but when all the killings in my country started, my father, who was a spiritual adviser to some of the government officials there, got caught up in all of it and was shot.”
She winced. “I’m so sorry, Jude.”
He sighed loudly. “I was devastated when I heard about it, but I have learned to just go on.”
“And what about your mother?” she asked.
“She died when I was just eight.”
“My mum passed away when I was around that age as well,” Sofia said. “After that, I was left alone with my dad, who treated me as though I was not there. I think he just wanted to be single and without any responsibilities. I had to raise myself because he was usually absent. I left the house and the small town I grew up in once I got into college, and I have never looked back.”
“I guess we have some things in common,” he said.
“So, I guess that’s why you don’t want to go back to your country,” she said. “You can’t because of the violence there and because your parents are gone. You are an only child, aren’t you?”
“Yes. Just like you.” He put down the fries he was eating, and for a few seconds he stared at the table. She could tell from the look on his face that there was something weighing on his mind. It was probably something about his country and his migrant status.
He looked up at her and said, “The violence in my country and the death of my dad are not the only reasons why I don’t want to go back to my country.”
She searched his face but said nothing.
“Before I left for America, I was engaged to my ‘high school sweetheart,’ as people here in America would say. We loved each other dearly, or at least I loved her dearly. I thought she loved me as much as I loved her.” He turned his head to gaze out the window and then faced Sofia again. “Her favorite topic when we were in high school was coming to live in America one day. I didn’t know how strong that desire was until a week or so before our wedding, when she broke up with me and the wedding had to be called off.”
Sofia covered her mouth with her hand. “Oh, Jude, I’m really sorry. That must have been rough for you.”
“Yes, it was,” he said. “I was heartbroken. She was the girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. We had talked about getting married for so long, it came as a shock to me when she broke our engagement. I later found out that she had met an American man online and had somehow found a way to come to America on his
invitation. The last thing I heard about her was that she had married him and was living in America with him.”
Sofia shook her head, feeling really sorry for him. He looked incredibly sad. She wanted to reach out and take his hand to comfort him, but that would not be a good idea.
He continued. “When my dad suggested that I come to America for my Masters degree, I immediately agreed. I told him the standard of education here would be much better than the one I would get in our country, but I think the main reason why I wanted to come here was because of Keziah, my ex. It’s funny to think about now, but I actually had an irrational belief that I would somehow run into her, in a country of over three hundred million people.” He laughed harshly.
“You still love her?” Sofia asked.
Jude looked up with a thoughtful expression on his face and then looked at her again. “I don’t really know. I miss her terribly. That I know. I wish I could just forget about her after what she did, breaking off our engagement two weeks before our wedding, but it’s not so easy. It’s been two years since she broke up with me, but I still think about her almost every day.”
Sofia smiled sadly and touched his hand. And then she quickly withdrew it. She thought about telling him about George and, for a moment, she fought herself, not totally prepared to tell him so much about herself. But then she decided to. He had poured out his heart to her even though it was clearly painful for him to do so.
She said to him, “I understand how you feel, Jude. I broke up with a guy I thought I would spend the rest of my life with not too long ago.”
She thought of telling him about her suicide attempt but held back on that. There was enough sadness to go around right now. She didn’t want to compound it, and it was too early to tell him something so heavy.
“Your friend was talking about a guy called George the other day,” Jude said. “Was he the one you broke up with?”
Sofia sighed. “Yes. He actually broke up with me. I also thought I was meant to spend the rest of my life with him. In fact, the day we broke up, I thought he was coming to my house to propose.”
“I’m really sorry,” Jude said.
Her heart felt heavy, and she remembered everything that had happened the day George had told her their relationship was over and kicked her out of his life and her apartment. She considered telling Jude about the fact that George’s wife had come with him to throw her out of the apartment, but she decided not to. Maybe he would judge her the way most people did when they found out she’d been dating a married man. She was not in the mood for that. “In spite of everything, if George came back now, I would take him right back,” she said.
He gave her a soft smile. “I would take Keziah back in a heartbeat if I saw her again as well.” He shook his head. “This is the first time I am admitting it.”
She looked down at her plate and then began to eat again.
Silence reigned between them, but it was not an awkward silence like the first day they’d met. It was a thoughtful silence. She was sure that, like her, he was thinking about the fact that if either of their exes came back into their lives right now, this arrangement between them would be over immediately, and what the consequences of that would be. If George came back to her, she would end it. Jude would be the one to suffer the consequences if that happened. He would be deported out of the country if he couldn’t find someone else. But even knowing that, she would still go back to George if he decided he wanted to mend their relationship and marry her. She felt slightly disgusted with herself over it, but it changed nothing about the way she felt.
She looked at Jude as he ate, while his eyes glanced around the restaurant. If in some crazy way his ex came back into his life, he had said he would take her back. That meant he would also end this arrangement, and she would be the one to lose. She would be kicked out of Edith’s by Flynn and then where would she go? Who knew when she would be able to get a job and make enough money to get a decent apartment? She might end up having to sleep in a shelter or something.
She blinked when Jude suddenly turned to her and their eyes met. He gave her a smile that warmed her heart. “What were you just thinking about?” he asked. “You looked like you were somewhere else.”
She told him.
He looked sober as he nodded. “Would you hate me if I prayed that your ex doesn’t come back?” he asked with a smile in his voice.
She raised her brows. “I didn’t know you believed in prayer? I have a friend who talks constantly about praying to God and all that nonsense.” She thought briefly about Lily and then focused fully on Jude.
“Like I told you, my father was a pastor. I grew up in a very religious home, and I believed in prayer and all of that for a long time… until I stopped.”
“You stopped believing in God?”
He shrugged. “Not really. I know God exists, but I don’t think he cares one way or the other about us or if we pray or not. I don’t believe that prayer makes any difference in our lives.”
“Just try to tell my friend, Lily, that.” Sofia sighed. “I miss that girl. She gets really exasperated with me sometimes, but I know she loves me.” Sofia sighed once more, missing Lily. “I don’t even know when I’ll see her again.”
“She sounds like a really good friend,” Jude said.
“She is,” Sofia said. “I have known her for only a short time, but she is now the closest person to me. The one person that I trust completely.” Sofia smiled at him. “I think you came to America believing that somehow you would find your ex again even though it’s almost impossible to. I think that is kinda sweet. In a way, I hope you do find her again. That is, after you have gotten your Green card and we’ve gone our separate ways.”
He smiled widely. “You’re right about it being impossible to find my ex. I don’t even want to think about it. The mind is a strange thing. If I start to think there is a possibility of seeing her again, I will start to build my hopes up when I know it will probably never happen. I would wish the same for you, that you will get back with your ex, but somehow I just don’t think he’s for you. I don’t think he deserves a girl like you.”
Jude’s eyes swept her face, and she felt herself blushing. Settle down, Sofia. What is wrong with you?
They soon changed the subject and began to talk about what they liked to do for fun. She told him that she enjoyed traveling the world above every other thing. Thinking about the many trips she’d taken with George brought an ache to her heart, but she pushed away the painful feeling. She listened as he talked about the many parties he’d thrown with his friend at their off-campus apartment. “It all sounds like a blast,” she said, laughing as he told her one joke after the other about the parties.
His smile soon melted off his face, and he said, “The truth is that sometimes I just want to be alone, even when those parties are going on. Many times, I feel like going to the bedroom, sitting in the dark, and crying for my parents and my country.”
This time she took his hand on the table and squeezed it. “I don’t know what to say to make you feel better, except to say that in time it will get better.” She smiled widely. “And also we need to hurry up this process so you can get your Green card and remain in this country.” She blinked in surprise after she had spoken. She sounded eager to marry him, and in her heart the repulsion she had felt when she’d first heard the idea of marrying someone she didn’t know in order to get him a Green card had mostly disappeared. She looked at Jude; really looked at him. She actually liked him and even felt comfortable with him. It would not be so bad, this proposed marriage. She felt much better now that she had gotten to know him more.
They continued to talk and laugh about their past. They talked a bit more about how she had come to Arizona and then about her old job. She still, however, didn’t tell Jude that George was a married man.
Sometime later, she glanced at her wristwatch and gasped in surprise. “It’s getting late, Jude. I have to go. It’s already nine o’clock. We’ve been here
for hours.”
He stared incredulously at her and then glanced at his wristwatch. His eyes widened, and he looked up at her. “Wow! Nine p.m. It doesn’t feel as if we have been here that long,” he said.
She giggled at the expression on his face. “You look like a teenager who has gone past his curfew,” she said.
He laughed. “In a way it feels like it.”
They both stood up after they had paid for their meal and left the fast-food restaurant together. Outside the restaurant, she turned to him and said, “I had a great time.”
“I did, too,” he said, smiling at her. “Can we do this again? In two days’ time?” he looked apologetic, and she tilted her head to study his face. “Normally I would ask to see a girl again for a second date days or even a week after our first, but this situation between us is different.”
She smiled. “I understand. You don’t have to apologize. We’re in this together, Jude.”
He looked surprised. “So you will go on another date with me… the day after tomorrow?”
“Of course,” she said. “This time, though, I’ll choose the place.”
He looked back at the restaurant and laughed. “I’m sorry, Sofia. I knew from the first time I met you that this,” he pointed at the fast food place, “would not be your scene. But I thought it might be a nice change for you.” He gave her a sheepish grin. “And it was all I could afford for now.”
“No, stop, Jude. I didn’t mind coming here at all. And you were right. It was a nice change for me.” She returned his smile. “But I have a better idea for a date.”
He gave her another heart-warming smile. “What idea is that?”
“I won’t tell you now,” she said. She reached out to give him a brief hug, but he folded her into his arms and held her for a moment longer than she would normally allow for a first date. She did not pull away, however. Just as he’d mentioned a minute ago, their situation was different.
He pulled back and gave her another smile. “I’ll call you tomorrow?”