Ghost Diaries 1_Gigi's Guardian_Paranormal Romance

by Michele McGrath

  8th December 1967, Friday evening, London.

  Gigi is still cringing at the thought of James. He phoned the hostel three times, but Jane or Adele took his calls and told him Gigi was out. The last call came two days ago. Gigi doesn’t know whether to be happy or sad he’s stopped trying.

  She went out with Finn tonight as she promised; the first time she’s gone anywhere except to work. The dance was being held at the LSE Students’ Union. They met at the pub for a couple of drinks.

  “Do you want to talk or would you rather forget everything for this evening?” he asked her immediately. He's been practising the words.

  “I’d rather forget.”

  “Okay. Let’s forget the whole world except us.”

  Finn was in a soaring mood. He wanted to be there for Gigi, but responding properly to her troubles would have been hard. His exams had gone well, although he crossed his fingers at the thought of the results.

  “I didn’t make a complete ass of myself so I might be able to qualify this summer,” he told her.

  Gigi sighed, feeling down again for a moment. When he qualified, he would be going home and she’d miss him. With an effort, she pulled herself together. Many things might change before then.

  Finn did as he promised. He told jokes, laughed, even sang a few songs as they walked down the road. He did manage to make Gigi forget her troubles for a while.

  “So good she's laughing again,” I remarked to Thelma. “She hasn’t laughed since the night they found out about James.”

  “According to my schedule, he’s going to do more than make her laugh very soon now.” Thelma smiled. “But, first, we’ve got to stop either of them knowing the correct time.”

  “How?”

  “Watch, if you forgive the pun.” Thelma pointed a finger at Finn’s wristwatch, which gave a sudden shudder and stopped. Gigi doesn’t own one any more. She took it off at work and she’s never been able to find it again. As Finn and Gigi walked down Houghton Street, a sweet, sickly odour filled the air, becoming stronger and stronger.

  “What’s that?” Gigi asked.

  “Pot. You have led a sheltered life!”

  “What a reek! Do none of the police have noses?”

  “They keep away from this sort of place, unless they’re expecting trouble. Not enough room in the jails to lock up everybody who smokes the stuff.”

  “What's it like?”

  “Frankly, I get more kick from alcohol.”

  “You would, you’re Irish.”

  “True. Do you want to try some?”

  “What happens?”

  “You become limp and sleepy and you have vivid dreams.”

  “I don’t want to fall asleep!” Gigi’s afraid to close her eyes at the moment. She thinks she’ll dream about James. She won’t, she needs sex to dream at all, but she hasn’t twigged to that fact yet. I wonder if she ever will.

  “Smoking’s not obligatory, you know.”

  “It seems like it!”

  The building was a large, square concrete block. You could hear the music right down the street – deafening! Psychedelic lights flashed over a seething crowd of dancers, jiving to the pounding beat. Gigi was glad to do something active. You couldn’t think in the feverish atmosphere. They danced and danced until they were tired. Finn was quite happy, but Gigi began to get hot. She was losing the high from the alcohol and her head pounded.

  “Please, can we go somewhere quieter?” she asked as the song finished. “I think I’m going to fall over if I don’t get some fresh air.”

  They went outside and strolled around, looking in the shop windows. Gigi told Finn about the ‘castles in the clouds’ and imagined buying furniture for her dream home. Thelma and I walked ahead of them, covering up all the clocks. Not that either of them were looking for the time; they had much better things to think about.

  The cool air cleared Gigi’s head eventually. “Let’s go back in now,” she suggested. “I want to dance again.” She had no idea of how long they’d been walking. They reached the Students’ Union as the last few people were leaving and the porters were locking up.

  “I didn’t realise it was so late.” Finn peered at his watch in dismay. The fingers still stood at half past ten, when Thelma had zapped it. He shook it and groaned. “My watch has stopped.”

  “What's the time?” he asked one of the porters.

  “Quarter to one.”

  “Good Lord!” Gigi exclaimed. “I won’t get back before the doors are locked. They close them at half one and don’t open them ’til 6 in the morning.”

  “Well. You can’t stay out all night. Do you want to come to my place? I promise I’ll be good.” Finn spoke carefully. Gigi hadn’t told him anything more about James. She’d avoided the subject and he hadn’t asked.

  “I might not hold you to that.”

  “Oh? Even better.” Finn's not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.

  “Told you this would work.” Thelma sounded smug. “Simple things are usually best.”

  “I’ll remember,” I said gratefully.

  Gigi went back to Finn’s bedsit. He made coffee and found some music on the radio. They lay on his bed, arms wrapped around each other, listening quietly for a while. Gigi felt warm and comfortable, for the first time in days. She nestled into Finn’s shoulder. He kissed her and Gigi kissed him back properly. She never has before. She slid her hands up under his sweater and caressed his bare skin.

  “Are you sure you want to do this?” Finn asked her.

  “Yes,” Gigi murmured, “If I ever see that creep, James, again, I’m going to run in the opposite direction. Kiss me, please.”

  “I told you he was a lovely lad,” Thelma whispered to me. “He’d have put her off if he’d rushed.”

  “Thank God she’s being sensible at last,” I agreed, hugging myself.

  Slowly, carefully, Finn began to undress her. Thelma and I crept out of the room and sat down beside a roaring fire, watching the stars. Despite the cold wind, the flames, the rum punch and hot roasted chestnuts made us as warm as toast.

  “Thanks,” I murmured to her, biting into a chestnut. “I’m so happy tonight. Things seem to be working out at last.”

  “Step one anyway. I knew they would, if we gave them enough time.”

  “You were right, although I have some niggles left. Why does she still think of Finn as a friend? When will she get over James? She’s thinking about him even now, in the back of her mind.”

  “You forget how young she is and the era she’s living in. In some ways this time period was more innocent, than yours. The world seemed to be a wonderful place. For a few years anyway, people believed anything could happen if they wanted it to. Kennedy began it with his ‘passing a torch to a new generation of Americans’ speech. He founded the Peace Corps and started the race to the moon - unheard of adventures. Gigi’s a child of her times with this romantic idea of love. She truly expects to find her Prince Charming, if she searches for him hard enough. She’s always fancied tall, dark, sophisticated men like James. In appearance, he's her ideal and he’s treated her reasonably well, except for the night at the opera. Now her dreams have been smashed to pieces. She’s struggling to come to terms with the fact that James destroyed them. Everything they shared seems false and she’s hurt.”

  “Finn is certainly nothing like James to look at.” Flaming red hair and a straggly beard aren’t to my taste or Gigi’s, apparently.

  “That’s why she thinks of him as a friend. She doesn’t realise close friends often make the best marriages. You can become so wrapped up in a person you judge everybody else by him. The whole thing gets turned inside out.”

  “We always talk about ‘marriages’, shouldn’t we say ‘relationships’?”

  Thelma smiled. “I’m afraid I'm not politically correct. The concept hadn’t been invented when I was young, or even when I was old. I think in terms of marriage and Gigi’s been brought up in the same way. She hopes to marry someone a
nd be with him forever.”

  “She will be, if she marries Finn.”

  “Finn’s another dreamer. Together, they won’t lose their ideals, although they’ll never be rich.”

  “Do you think money matters to them?”

  “No. The pair of them will be happy enough just making do. If you want to make their dreams come true, though, you’d better get busy right now. Don’t forget your most important job tonight.”

  “I won't. Are they asleep yet?”

  “I can hear Finn snoring.”

  “I’ll go right now.”

  I tiptoed into the bedroom, took Gigi’s pills from her handbag and hid them under the rug. Finn’s not good at cleaning, so they should be lost for long enough to serve my purpose. The two of them looked quite sweet, curled around each other. Gigi’s dreams were full of colour again, but fuzzy. I couldn’t decipher the images and I didn’t want to linger, in case I spoiled something. I decided to leave things alone for now.

  Finn and Gigi spent the next morning in bed. Finn’s an even better lover than James, if Gigi’s grin is anything to go by. She’s certainly been lucky - were all men so considerate in the Sixties? How brilliant if they were.

  Gigi reluctantly dragged herself back to the hostel late the following afternoon and her pills remained under the mat. Finn only found them on Tuesday morning. He rang and told her they would need to take precautions for the rest of the month. He didn’t tell her the damage might already be done. He’s crossing his fingers her period comes on time and he’s wondering whether he should ask her when she's due. He hasn’t so far, because he doesn’t want to worry her. He’s decided to let Gigi tell him if she has any problems. Good. Everything is going exactly as planned.

  16th December 1967, Saturday, London.

  “Where did you get to last night?” Adele asked Gigi, with a knowing smile on her face.

  “Finn’s,” Gigi smiled. Her eyes went all gooey.

  “Oh?” Adele laughed. “Good for you - replacing the dreaded James. Well done.”

  “Yeah, but I feel a bit guilty. Things changed so quickly.”

  “Sauce for the goose...”

  “I suppose I haven’t let go yet.”

  “You will. Everyone needs time to bounce back from a broken love affair and Finn’s around when you need him. Why not relax and enjoy him?”

  “He isn’t James.”

  “Good thing too. I’ve never understood what you saw in James. After all, he’s humiliated and lied to you.”

  “I can’t explain it myself. I keep wondering if I should ring him up. Perhaps there is another explanation for Oxford.”

  “Why would he bother to lie to you, if everything was innocent? I saw them and innocent isn't the word I'd use.”

  “I don’t know.”

  “You weren’t engaged to him. From his point of view, why shouldn’t he date someone else as well?”

  “If he cared for me, he wouldn’t want to.”

  “True. He didn't say he loved you, did he?”

  “No. I never told him either.”

  “He’ll keep trying to make contact, if he really wants to be with you, Gigi. If he doesn’t, he won’t bother any more. He's tried several times, remember?”

  “Why didn't I take the call and ask him point blank why he lied?”

  “Why didn’t you?”

  “I couldn't think of what to say to him; I was too angry and hurt. How could I even tell him I knew about the girl in Oxford? Can you imagine the explosion if he found out we’d followed him?”

  “The right words don't exist, but why are you blaming yourself still?”

  “I should have tried harder.”

  “The trouble with you, Gigi, is that you are expecting Mr. Right to come waltzing into your life. You'll fall in love and he'll whisk you away to live happily ever after. Unfortunately those things only happen in fairytales.”

  “I thought James was Mr. Right.”

  “Perhaps we need to invent him for ourselves.”

  Gigi’s voice became wistful, “If you could create your ideal man, what would he be like?”

  “A lot like Ralph, only younger, unmarried and hopelessly in love with me.”

  Gigi went over and hugged her. “I’m sorry. I was thoughtless.”

  “Don’t be. All sorts of things remind me of Ralph at the moment, but I’ll get over him. I always do. We’ve both got to be practical. Life goes on.”

  “And you never know what’s round the corner.”

  “India in my case.”

  “You’re really going?”

  Adele nodded. “I should have saved enough money by the summer.”

  “Wonderful!”

  “So Gigi hasn’t stopped thinking about James,” Maude commented to me, “despite the other girl in his life.”

  “Do you remember how long you took to get over your own first love?” I asked. I realised, with a shock, the thought of Michael didn’t hurt me any more.

  “About thirty seconds.” Maude grinned. “I was nine and madly in love with the butcher’s boy. Barney wore shoes and had a moderately clean face. I used to run after him, when he made his rounds. He was a couple of years older than me and far too grand to notice my existence. One day, I lifted a man’s purse, just as Barney came round the corner. He spotted me and raised the hue and cry. I nearly got caught. If I had been, they would have hanged me. I never felt the same about him afterwards.”

  “I’m not surprised.”

  “Oh, I paid him back. He became the prime target for me and my gang. Robbing him was a game and we ate better than we ever had before. Even Mum was impressed. I still wonder how I managed to get to Heaven.”

  “Did you repent?”

  “No, I paid the penance for my sins on Earth, or rather in Australia. What was your first love like?”

  “Mine was Michael, the one I told you about.”

  “Sorry, mate. They’re all rotters, first loves, aren’t they?”

  “Except Tommy maybe.”

  “Tommy isn't Jane’s first love. Remember the boy she mentioned, the one she went out with for a few weeks? He was hers, but he fell for someone else and dumped her. Jane was so miserable her parents let her go to London for training. At home, she couldn’t avoid bumping into him all the time. Tommy’s not her first, but hopefully he’s going to be her last love.”

  “Let’s hope our last loves are better than our first ones then,” I said, thinking of Ivan.

  “They have to be. Otherwise it’s celibacy for us and I don’t fancy that, do you?”

  “Not my style.”

  “Mine neither.”

  23rd December 1967, Saturday, London.

  “Promise me not to open them ’til Christmas.” Jane handed Gigi and Adele the two gaily wrapped parcels.

  “Are you off now?” Gigi asked.

  “Yes. I promised to make Tommy a proper Christmas dinner with all the trimmings.”

  “I didn’t realise you could cook.”

  “I can’t. I’ve got the stuff ready made from Marks and Sparks. I'm going to hide the labels, so he won’t find out, and heat it up. His mother taught him to cook and he usually does the cooking.”

  “No wonder you want to marry him.”

  “Sex isn’t the only reason. Mind you, the sex...” Jane giggled.

  “We don’t want to know!”

  “What did your parents say, when they found out you weren’t coming home for Christmas?” Gigi asked.

  “One thing about nursing is I have a good excuse. We’re all on duty and I won’t get off until late when there’s no trains running. No problem.”

  Adele opened her wardrobe and produced a small package. “You’d better take this with you. It isn’t much but I hope you like it.”

  “You shouldn’t have got me anything; you’re saving so hard.”

  “Christmas only comes once and we're unlikely to be here this time next year. Take it.”

  “Here is mine too.” Gigi handed over he
r present. “How strange, I was just thinking the same thing. I wonder where we will all be next Christmas.”

  “I hope I’ll be with Tommy.” Jane looked anxious for a moment.

  “I’ll be in India and Gigi will be somewhere fabulous with her Prince Charming.”

  “I wish.”

  “Anyway, girls, it would be too much to hope we’ll still be together, so let’s enjoy it while we can.”

  “Good point.”

  “Merry Christmas, Jane.”

  Jane left and Leilani went with her, loaded down with her own presents. I had filled a crystal bottle with ‘The pelting spray of ocean’ to remind her of home. I don’t know what Maude had given her. Neither of us has seen our gifts yet, because we all solemnly swore not to open them until Christmas morning. A shame Leilani can’t be with us, but duty comes first. We’re going to celebrate properly when she returns. In the meanwhile, I expected to spend most of Christmas on my own. Thelma asked me if I’d mind keeping my eye on Finn, while she went to visit her family. Of course I agreed, but I felt a bit blue, remembering all the good times we’d had in the past. I didn’t appreciate those Christmases as much as I should. I’m going to see Pam and my grandparents when Thelma gets back, but I kept thinking about my parents and sister – this was their first Christmas without me. I could check on them in the portal, but I was reluctant to do so. I didn’t want to see them horribly sad. On the other hand, what if they weren’t? I’m such a coward. I told myself that all my family would be together again, one day, and the good times will return.

  After Jane had left, Adele turned to Gigi and said, “I do wonder what 1968 will bring. I think this year is going to be a turning point for all of us. I’ve got this strange feeling.”

  “Don’t! You’re making my skin crawl. I never liked ghost stories, even at Christmas.”

  Maude and I dissolved into giggles. “If she only knew her room is full of ghosts...”

  Gigi propped her Christmas card up on the windowsill. Then she asked the question she had wanted to ask all morning, “Where are you going to spend Christmas Day?”