The sound of sneakers squeaked off the court and music blared from the outdoor speakers. There were couples by the pool making out and one in particular caught my attention. Geoff was lying with a woman on his lap. And she wasn’t wearing bottoms.
My mouth fell open as I examined their bodies. My face burst into flames.
“What’s wrong?”
I looked up at Wreck approaching and then pointed at his friend. “He’s having sex with her. In public,” I added, like it was exactly the all-out scandal it felt like to me.
But they both looked over and then back at me like I was the weird one. “So?” Wreck said, sinking down beside Ryder and me, making one screwed up triangle. He handed me an ice-cold can of diet root beer and two slices of combination pizza. “Rip can do what he wants with his own dick. And that’s probably the highlight of her life. Who am I to ruin their fun?”
I didn’t know who disgusted me more. Them or his blasé attitude. “You’ve done that? Had sex in front of everyone?”
He leaned back on his hands, stretching his long legs out. His lips twitched, like he was trying not to laugh at me. “Shit happens, Hallie. It’s not like I can bring girls back here and do them. If she doesn’t mind, neither do I.”
Ryder glanced at me with an amused glint in his dark eyes. “You going to eat all that?” He nodded at my pizza.
“Get your own fucking pizza, Storm,” Wreck growled, making the hair on my arms rise.
But Ryder just shrugged and got up, taking off to presumably do that. Rip changed positions and I caught a glimpse of boob. I knew I should look away, but it was strangely fascinating. She put her hands on his shoulders as he lifted his hips into her.
“Eat your pizza, Hallie.”
I met Wreck’s amused gaze and blushed, rolling my eyes and opening my soda. “I can’t believe they’re just doing it in front of everyone.”
“It’s actually invigorating. Knowing people are watching your pleasure. Witnessing something that’s supposed to be happening in private. It’s lying to everyone’s face for the sake of telling the truth.”
I took a bite just as she orgasmed, tossing her head back and gasping. It was like watching someone skydive. I’d never do it, but I could understand why they did it. To be free within their cage. “Is she a junior?” I didn’t recognize her.
“Nah, senior. I think she’s new. Her grandfather invented some kind of self-cleaning outhouse or something.”
“Rich as shit, huh?” I winked at him, licking sauce from my finger.
He rolled his eyes at my joke. “Kind of smart business. My old man invested a chunk into his company, so I guess he’s Charmant approved now.”
“Oh goody. We should send him our condolences.”
He crossed his feet over his ankles and leaned further back on his elbows. He looked so long in the grass, eyes trained on the side of my face. My own did their best not to look at the couple getting dressed by the pool or the man stretched out in front of me. Or the fact that I had to figure out a way to keep this going with Wreck.
“I don’t think he’s aware that he walked into a beautifully lavish trap,” he mumbled. “Let’s not wreck it for him. He only saw the money, so that’s all he’ll have someday.”
I wiped my mouth off and then ran my fingers across his grass, setting the empty plate on the court. On his back, Wreck drank a fresh beer. I moved to lie on my back beside him, putting my arms behind my head.
“Are you seeing anyone?” I asked. “Seriously.” There seemed to be a tenuous line of understanding between us right now. Like our fathers were crossing paths and so were we, but our backs were turned, and I wasn’t sure where exactly to look.
“No,” he said simply. “You?” But he sounded like he already knew the answer.
I snorted. “What for? So my dad could throw him over the cliff in the backyard?” In seconds, I was pissed and afraid again. I couldn’t do this without him. “Wreck?” I looked around carefully. The group beside us was a way down, and they weren’t looking over. “Can I talk to you about something?” I rolled onto my side, lining my body with his and putting our faces close together.
“Has he done that before?” His eyes were on the stars.
Not me. “He didn’t throw him over the cliff, but yeah.”
His eyes closed. His breathing deepened. I felt his rage a second after seeing it unfold over his entire body, coiling his muscles like a rubber band ready to snap. “Again,” he said, like he was finally understanding something. “Who?” he demanded suddenly, dropping his beer and moving for me so fast I fell back. His hand shot out to grab my face. “Who were you in love with, Hallie?” He cradled my face between his hands tenderly and possessively, crazed and protectively. “Who?” he shouted into my face.
I flinched away, but he held me in place. This was bad. People would talk. My dad would find out. He’d destroy Illa. So, I kissed him. I pressed my lips to his so everyone would forget his anger and only see this. His enraged eyes became shock, and then they shifted into feral understanding.
He moved to lie between my legs, resting his full weight on top of my body, and then he kissed me intensely, his eyes fluttering closed. My hands came to rest on his back. His lips were so perfectly warm and soft. I hadn’t expected them to feel so silky warm. I heard myself moan against his lips and my fingers dug into his back, fisting the fabric of his shirt as his kiss turned rough, angry. And though his anger should have made the kiss unappealing, it starved me. It made me want it rougher, angrier. Real. I kissed him back harder, losing myself in the impassioned fury burning in his lips. His hands touched my face, moving into my hair and holding on to me so tenderly it belied his rough kiss.
He pulled away first, growling into my neck. “I’m sorry,” he huffed, but he didn’t sound sorry at all, and I wasn’t sure what exactly he was apologizing for. Screaming at me or kissing me back.
I couldn’t think right. My lungs were trying to breathe after he stole my breath. He was still on top of me, so much larger, heavier, smelling like him. The musk of beer that had been on his lips were now on mine. I wanted a beer suddenly. To taste like Wreck.
Something pressed into my thigh below his belt. The heat of his erection was searing, burning where it touched me. It felt like we were breaking some kind of rule. Wreck wouldn’t have done it if we were, but I wanted something that felt that good to be against the rules. I would break them anyway.
“My father’s going to fire Illa and take her retirement away if I don’t… I don’t know exactly what he wants, but he wants me to do it with you.” I pressed my forehead to his, our heavy breaths continuing to kiss. Tears burned in my eyes. “He already took Tristan from me. Illa is the only person I have left in this world that I love. I need your help, Wreck. This doesn’t have to be real. You can keep hooking up with whoever you want, just as long as my father doesn’t find out. But he has to think it’s real. I can’t lose the last thing I love. If that happens, I’ll be his. I don’t want to be his. I want to be mine.”
He eased his body off mine and fell to his back. “I have to do what you want, Hallie.”
“Why?” I rolled onto my side again and touched his face, waiting for him to look at me. “Why, Wreck?”
“Maybe I have someone to lose as well.” His sadness was so sharp, I felt it stab my sad parts. “You want to put on a show? I’ll be your lead. But you have to know what you’re doing right now. You have to know.”
No, I didn’t. I never knew why my father did what he did, but I understood why he did it, and that he had methods to rearrange my threshold for understanding. “I know what I have to do.”
“My little star,” he whispered, touching my earrings for some reason. “You have no idea how bright you could really shine.”
Cage was kind of killing me right now. Wreck flipped me off, and Cage was too gentle to ever consider doing so. It reminded me of myself, of the Hallie inside of me who made out with him on the grass, and the me who blushed at his comm
ent.
“Will you help me?”
His eyes moved from my ears to my eyes. “You really love Illa. You never loved Tristan. Tell me I’m right and I’ll help you.”
“I did love him.”
“No, you didn’t. You let your father get in the way. You didn’t have a choice, we both know that, and you probably don’t have a choice now, but you’re not going to let it stop you. You let your father stop you then. Tell me you never loved him, tell me you made a mistake ever letting him fucking touch you, and I’ll lay it on so thick, your father won’t ever think about taking what you love again. Say it, Hallie.”
I didn’t like that he wanted me to lie to him, but I really didn’t like that he needed to hear the lie in the first place. Why would Wreck care who I loved? But he was right, unfortunately, in a humiliating way. I let Father push Tristian away, but it wasn’t like I had a choice. His life and wellbeing were more important than his kiss and touch. I felt the hollow places Tristan left behind flare in pain. The hollow places Illa would leave behind, however, would never heal.
“I never loved Tristan. And I never should have let him touch me.”
He nodded firmly. “May I share something with you?” He kissed my lips so softly, I barely felt his heat. “My father is going to ruin me if I don’t get you on my side. I need this lie just as much as you.”
“What’s their problem? Forcing people together? Making people go away? They can’t keep doing this.”
“But they will.” His eyes mirrored mine. We were stuck. We could fight, and maybe one day nothing would end up mattering, but right now it did, and fighting would only take it all away that much sooner. “It’s kind of simple. You and me. As long as we both know what’s going on, we can keep them happy, you can keep Illa, and I can keep my… investments protected.”
This was about money for him? I should have known. Once a Wreckmond, always a Wreckmond. “So, we’re dating, then?” I made air quotes.
He nodded once, pressing another kiss to my lips. “We’re dating.”
Where were his air quotes?
I kissed him too, but only because for the past ten or so minutes, he was all I saw. It felt good to be able to share my bindings with someone who understood. “What does this relationship entail?”
“This?” His lips brushed across mine. “This?” He grabbed my hand that was on his chest, interlocking our fingers together. “This?” He pulled me close and urged his erection between us and against my thigh.
“You’re still hard?”
He grinned, and this close up, his smile was its own kind of trap. He took my hand and placed it over his hardness. “This?”
I should have said no.
I should have said hell no.
I shouldn’t have splayed my palm across the top of the raised mound on his jeans. And I damn sure shouldn’t have buried my face against his chest. By the time I pulled my hand free, it was too late. Obviously, it would be that kind of fake relationship.
“Look at me,” he ordered softly, lifting my head. “You control this. You want something, you get it. You don’t want it, neither do I. And if you do want something, you don’t have to be ashamed of it. Hell, Hallie, when’s the last time you wanted anything from someone else and took it? Take it from me. Trust me, it’s probably already yours anyway.”
I ignored the flutter in my stomach. I couldn’t let this façade get comfortable. Even if I felt extremely content in that moment, sharing the same breath and the same body heat with him, no pretenses, a touch that wouldn’t be wrenched from me tomorrow.
“Say something.”
I made air quotes instead.
8. BRIGHT SPOT
Wreck
My self-control was a crutch.
I had so much because I ultimately had no real temptation around me. I could have what I wanted and the things I barely desired were already mine.
My self-control was crumbling right before my eyes. I wanted to take Hallie to my bedroom and peel those tight ass jeans down her legs. Sink between them and spend hours inside of her. She wanted that too. She may not want me, but she wanted what I could do.
I had to get up, breathe in something else other than her. It felt criminal letting her go. Her eyes went so well with the night, so dark against the dark, so bright against the bright. But her eyes were also fearful and red.
Something happened with her father. She assumed she knew what was happening. I could have told her I knew too, but then she’d have to make a choice, and then she’d have to learn that what she and I wanted had nothing to do with what would happen.
If she wanted it, she’d get it.
But that’s it.
She wanted me to help her. She had no idea she was helping me too. Or that her father had just made this atrocity ten times more atrocious playing with her love.
I moved away from her touch and got to my feet. For eighteen years, my father had dropped hints. Put me in Hallie’s path. Dangled her in front of me like bait, and then he starved me, made me so desperate for the bait that I wouldn’t know what to do if I had it. But I knew that I would. I’d have what I hungered for, but I’d know that the bait never wanted to be caught.
“Damn it, Hallie.” I plunged both hands through my hair and tugged, releasing my fists when I felt my skull pound. Everything was wrong. It was coming for me at all angles. I didn’t know which one would attack first, or how my fight would go. Not all battles required physical force.
The only thing that made sense was keeping Hallie happy and keeping my father’s nails from digging further into her back.
The purpose of our existences was fodder. We weren’t born to live. We were born to serve. We’d known that but hadn’t picked it. And this fight was so much harder when you didn’t pick the weapons.
My phone vibrated in my pocket. I opened the text from Storm. W’s ready to go. Shit. I hadn’t anticipated Hallie would stay this long.
“What’s wrong?” she asked softly, touching my arm.
Her touch was both heavy and lightening. A storm in the midst of salvation. “I’ve got something to do for a few minutes. You want to hang out until I come back?”
She bit her lip and stared around her, her face flushing bright pink. I followed her gaze to see that most of everyone outside was staring at us. At me. Even Rip looked confused.
“What did we do?” she whispered, terrified.
“Nothing. I think that’s the point.” Good. They’d gossip. Wreck and Hallie Goodford were rolling around on his lawn. I leaned to press a kiss to her cheek. “Smile.”
She did, and even though it was fake, it was nice. Pink heart-shaped lips spreading over her teeth. “I think I’ll go home now.”
“You don’t have to.” I was still starving. I’d push my bait away, but that didn’t mean I wanted it gone.
“I have to.” She sighed and hugged herself. “I’ll walk myself out.”
Did she want me to get killed? I took her hand and led her through the party. Heads turned, eyes widened. It would have been comical if I weren’t so reliant on their gossip. I steered her around the yard gate, walking across the stone driveway for her Audi parked by the guard stand. I slipped him a hundred to take a shift-long lunch break. After she’d unlocked and opened her door, she turned to me.
“What? No goodbye kiss for your fake girlfriend?” She nodded to something over my shoulder.
I didn’t have to look to know people were watching. I tapped her chin and she lifted it, bringing my lips down on hers. The heat of her mouth was instantaneously addictive. My hand shot out to hold her face in place in case she decided I’d had enough. There was never enough. I backed her up against her car and gave her nothing but truth in this kiss.
Every kiss I ever shared with a girl felt like shaking hands with a stranger. Cool, obligatory, emotionally empty.
Hallie was barely contained flames. She was looking for a reason to explode. I’d stand in her way, let her fire burn me to nothing. I’d breathe h
er flames in and wade through the heat to never feel cold again. There was no denying it, not to her, not to myself. I had my bait in my arms and I wanted to shove it down my throat, swallow her whole.
It was pure unadulterated torture to want what you would ultimately destroy.
She’d never want me past self-preservation. She’d have me because she had no choice.
She was starving, but I wasn’t her bait. I was her reason for hunger.
Watching her drive away, I put my hands in my pockets as my heart raced.
She’d better wear her fucking earrings.
Storm was in my room when I made it up there. He was sitting at my desk tapping on the keyboard.
“I’m waiting on you to make the transfer. The server can only be down for seven seconds. They sweep it every ten, but it takes 1.5 seconds for the last sweep to click over, and vice versa. It’ll give us a three second cushion. Once we deposit this money, we’ll be into the fund. I’ll backtrack the offshore depositing route and when we come out on the other side, we’ll take everything with us.”
“When?”
“When you say so.”
“I don’t know when that will be.”
He shrugged. “As long as we keep depositing money, we’re in. They’re boosting investments by 3% a week. They take what they’ve ripped off, and give to their investors, taking dirty money and making it not clean, but far less liable to be questioned. No cut, just a constant influx of dirty and clean money. It’s insane.” He sounded amazed.
I wasn’t impressed. Greed made for a desire for more. My father’s bait was money, and he was gorged. “What do you think they’ll do with it?” I asked, staring at the numbers and letters on the screen in confusion. I wasn’t a hacker, Storm was.
“6.2 billion dollars unaccounted for? What couldn’t you do? It feels like a cushion to me though. They either anticipated something that never happened, or they’re preparing.”
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