by Bella Jewel
I snort angrily. “Don’t flatter yourself, Axel. I already know a heart like yours can’t be warmed.”
His face changes at my statement, and he almost looks offended by my words, however he quickly wipes the look and replaces it with that empty, blank look he carries around each day. I shake my head, proving to myself that Axel isn’t going to break. He’s managed to gather some kind of darkness in his soul, and he’s not willing to let it go.
He rocks back on his heels after a moment, and gives me another empty smirk. “You got some sort of hero in your life that’s goin’ to come and foolishly try to rescue you?”
I lift my eyes, and meet his. I know my expression is hard. “Heroes are for the weak, Axel. If I escape, it will be all on me.”
His eyes sparkle with challenge. “Well, you’ll need all the luck you can muster up if you think you’re getting out of here.”
“I don’t need luck,” I say, sitting up and crossing my legs.
“So confident, aren’t you?” he murmurs, still kneeling in front of me, rubbing his big hands together.
“What happened to you when you went missing for all those months?” I blurt suddenly, and then cringe at how forward I’m being.
I’ve never seen someone’s body stiffen so quickly in my entire life. It’s almost as if he jerks, he stiffens that intensely. His eyes seem to glaze over, going off into a different place. His breathing deepens, and his hands form fists. I narrow my eyes, watching him closer, taking in every movement on his face as he goes through the motions. When his eyes finally lift to meet mine, they’re wild with rage.
“What happens in my life,” he snarls, baring his teeth, “is none of your motherfuckin’ business.”
“You made it my business when you killed the only person I had left in my life. You made this my business when you decided to make me run across the country!” I protest angrily.
His eyes widen for a split second, showing his shock. But in true Axel form, he covers it quickly.
“You’re walking a fine line, Cricket,” he says, baring his teeth.
“Before all of this, before you killed my father and I was sent running, there was something between you and I. A connection. An understanding. Hell, a friendship. Now, though, you’re empty. Something eats at you, and the person I knew has been replaced with this...shell.”
“I’ve changed, and you’re pushing me over a very, very weak line right now,” he rumbles, and I catch a glimpse of his trembling hands.
“People don’t change, Axel, they simply take paths that lead them down roads which are sometimes damaging. It doesn’t change who they are, it merely adds to it. You’re there, somewhere, past all that darkness and brooding.”
“The man you knew is gone,” he says, so firmly, so icily, that I shudder.
“I don’t believe that.”
He gets to his feet, staring down at me. “Believing something is just a way of trying to convince yourself that something you so desperately want is real. You can’t make something real just by believing in it, Cricket. This,” he says, pointing to his chest, “is damaged, and there ain’t no glue in the world that can put it back the way it was.”
Then he turns, and he leaves the room, leaving me to stare at the empty door with burning eyes and an aching heart.
~*~*~*~
AXEL
I slam my fist over and over into the punching bag in the garage. They burn and ache, but I can’t stop the rage. I drive my fists into the hard leather until they’re busted and bleeding, then I slump down onto the ground, gripping my head and smothering the angry roar that’s creeping up my throat.
I need to regain my control. I need to put her back in her place.
She’s trying to fuck with my head, and no one, no one fucks with my head. I drive my fist into the bag again, and my knuckles split, sending bright-red blood down over my wrist. I snarl and hit it once more, sending a delicious burn up my arm. I won’t back down now. I’ll give her a reason to hate me, and I have the perfect way to do that.
My feet move, and I find myself heading out into the main room.
When I see Cobra, I do the only thing I can. The only thing to put a distance between us. The only thing that will stop her looking at me like she can fix me.
“Cobra,” I rasp. “It’s time to scare her into giving me the location of that USB. Prepare her. We’re going to the local bridge.”
CHAPTER 7
MEADOW
Capture my heart, lock me in the dark.
I open my eyes when I hear the sounds of boots squeaking across the polished wooden floor. I see one of Axel’s men, Cobra, I believe, edging towards me. His eyes give me nothing. He’s staring at me as if I’m no more than a pathetic toy his boss is playing with. It’s a shame too; he’s an extremely sexy man. He’s got this longish blonde hair that falls over his forehead, and his eyes are a piercing blue. He’s got lip rings, and an eyebrow ring. All this combined gives him a dangerous look.
I see a set of handcuffs in his hands, and my entire body stiffens. What is he doing with those?
He leans down, unchaining me. He’s an idiot. There’s no other way to put it. The moment my feet are unchained, I lunge forward, punching him in the groin. With a bellow, he stumbles backward and roars in pain. I don’t wait around. I leap to my feet, and I run out the door. I get to a long hall, and I skid quickly to the left. Hearing the sounds of voices, I tuck myself into a room, breathing hard and fast.
“Yeah, I’m hearing you,” a female voice says. “He’s in a mood all right.”
“Fuck him,” another female says as they fade into the distance.
I peer around the door, and I hear Cobra bellow out Axel’s name, and something about escaping. Shit. I run back out into the hall, skid around a corner, and come crashing into Axel. His hands instantly curl around my upper arms, so tightly I’m sure I’ll bruise. He turns and slams me against a nearby wall. His eyes are wild with rage, and he’s panting. I guess he heard Cobra’s yelling.
“You just don’t fucking give up, do you?” he roars.
“No,” I snarl, bringing my knee up and hitting him in the groin. He bellows in pain and stumbles backwards. I duck around him to keep running but he lunges at me, using the power of his body to drop me and crush me against the floor.
I don’t stop fighting. I grip the carpet with my fingers, digging my nails in, and I pull myself forward, all the while kicking and twisting furiously. Axel’s body is heavy, and solid, and there’s no escaping it. He reaches up, gripping my wrists and bringing them back forcefully behind my back. I wail in pain, and snarl curses at him as I continue to twist.
“Hand me the fuckin’ cuffs,” he growls.
A moment later, the cool cuffs are snapped onto my wrists. Axel moves his body off mine and reaches down, taking hold of me and hurling me up so hard a sharp, shooting pain radiates through my back. I scream and kick out again, hitting him in the shins. He spins me, slamming me against the wall, and leaning in close.
“You’re goin’ to fuckin’ regret that.”
“Bring it on,” I spit.
His eyes grow wide with something, I don’t know if it’s hate or desire, but I’m almost sure I just made the wrong move challenging him like that.
~*~*~*~
My lips are trembling, and I can’t breathe. I want to open my mouth and scream, but nothing comes out. Even if I wanted to speak, I couldn’t. My words are caught in my throat, no doubt trapped behind the protests. Axel has me pushed against the railing of the biggest bridge he could find that wasn’t in a public place. I can see the water below. I can hear it splashing against the rocks along the side.
“Didn’t wanna have to do this, but you’re not understanding me, Cricket. I need that USB, and I need it now. If I have to toss you off this bridge a hundred times to get it, I will.”
I open my mouth to beg, but nothing comes out. I’m frozen with shock and fear. My entire body is stiff, and tingling all over. My heart feels like it
’s going to launch out of my chest, and my stomach is coiling tightly. Desperation fills my body, and I want to beg frantically, anything to stop Axel from putting me over this bridge. But I can’t speak. I’m trying. I can’t.
“Answer me, goddammit,” he snarls.
I close my eyes, and angry tears slide down my cheeks. You’re stronger than this, Meadow. You can beat this fear. You can swim now. Let him throw you over the edge...let him...my eyes snap open...if he throws me over, I can swim to the side and run...I can escape. My heart rate picks up, and my body fills with that familiar adrenalin.
“Last chance. Answer me, or I toss you over.”
I clamp my mouth shut, fighting with fear and terror, fighting with my own head. This might be my only chance. I focus on trying to breathe as I feel Axel grip my shirt, shoving me forward. I swallow a scream, and my hands clench together. You can do this. You can swim now. It’s going to be fine. It’s all okay. You’re stronger, braver, better...
“Fine, have it your way,” Axel hisses, and then he shoves my body forward and I fall over the side of the bridge with a scream so loud it echoes through the night sky.
I land in the water with an almighty crack. My skin burns angrily as I struggle to resurface. It isn’t easy when I’m cuffed, but I manage to. I blink furiously, kicking my legs and using my combined fist to shove the water from my eyes. I see Axel’s men standing at the left and right sides of the bank. They’re watching me with smirks on their faces. I scream help, and begin flailing around, pretending I can’t swim. Then I take a deep breath and go under the water, heading straight under the bridge and out the other side. I ignore the tingling all over my body, and the slap-like pain that’s radiating off my thighs.
I reach the bank, and I can hear Axel’s men yelling and cursing at each other. They probably think I’ve drowned. At least, I hope they have. That was the point. I launch myself out, hitting a bunch of thick, spikey shrubs. I scramble, struggling to get to my feet without the use of my hands. My body is filled with a strange kind of power, and the fear of jumping from that bridge is gone. Instead, it’s given me a sense of strength.
I duck down, and I shove through the trees. I have no idea where I am, or if I’m going to end up over the side of a cliff running into the night like this, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take. I can’t hear Axel, and I wonder if he’s still making his way off the bridge. That, or he’s slowly murdering his men for being so stupid.
When I get past the shrubs, I begin running gently, cuffed arms out in front of me to navigate my way through the trees. I glimpse a light to my left, and my heart leaps into my throat. Seconds. Seconds. I turn to the right, pushing on, distancing myself from the light as much as I can. I can hear voices yelling in the distance somewhere, but I don’t want to stop and hear what they’re saying.
I hit what feels like pavement, and I almost sigh in relief. A road. I peer left and right, and the lights of the cars begin appearing both ways, burning my eyes. I squint and take a step back, debating which way to run. The road was behind the bridge, I believe, so I’ll go left, the way that leads away from him.
With bare feet, I start making my way down the road in a light jog. My legs are aching, and an awful tingly feeling is creeping its way up my body. My body is stiff and sore, and my head is pounding, but I don’t stop. Nothing can make me give up right now.
I don’t even want to consider how close Axel might be. I didn’t hear him yell. Maybe he thinks I didn’t surface.
Then I hear the rumbling of a Harley-Davidson, and my body stiffens. I slowly turn, and see one single light hammering toward me. With a scream, I leap off the road and begin running through the trees again, hitting them and scratching my body with their twigs. I see a light flash, and then I hear the sound of boots crunching. I pick up my pace, and end up running directly into a large, thick tree. I am launched backward with a scream, and blood spurts from my nose. I cry out loudly as I feel my body sink to the ground in shock.
Then I feel arms, wrapping around me and dragging me back out through the trees.
“Let me go,” I scream.
“That was fuckin’ stupid, but smart. You’re fuckin’ clever, you little shit,” Axel growls.
“My...n-n-n-nose...” I choke out, pressing my hands over it as Axel drags me.
When we step onto the road, Axel lets me go and flashes the light across my face.
“The fuck did you do?” he asks.
“I ran into a tree trying to escape you, you stupid fuck!”
He snorts, and then turns to his bike, opening the side panniers to get an old, oily slither of material. He lets me go for a split second, so I turn and attempt to launch my body back toward the shrubs. If I can run further, maybe a car will see me with blood all over my face, and stop.
Axel growls and runs after me, his boots crunching loudly on the gravel. He reaches me before I even have the chance to get fifty meters down the road.
My body is exhausted.
I’m exhausted.
His fingers curl around my arm, and he spins me towards him with a feral hiss. “Fight as you may, you will not escape me. I’m not going to be making such a stupid mistake again. You’re cluey, girl. Smarter than I’d thought. Your dad would be real proud.”
“How dare you?” I seethe, tugging my hands, but he’s got them firmly clasped in his.
He steps back, keeping one hand on the chain of my cuffs. He takes his shirt, and pulls it up, unhooking one arm before switching hands and unhooking the other. My eyes widen in shock at the sight of his excessively large, muscled body. Jesus. He walks toward me, and curls his fingers around the back of my head, pressing his shirt to my nose. I’m grateful he decided not to use the scrap of material, but the pain of him pressing it against my face has me crying out in agony.
“Stop fuckin’ movin’,” he orders. “I have to hold this here until the bleeding stops, because clearly you can’t hold it.”
He rattles my handcuffs, and I want to cock-punch him.
“You fucker,” I growl, but it comes out as a muffled sound that even I can’t understand.
“I can’t understand you,” Axel says, and his tone is amused. “But by all means, keep cursing me. I imagine that’s what you’re doing behind my shirt right now.”
Asshole.
He stands there for a solid ten minutes, neither of us speaking. When he’s satisfied the bleeding has stopped, he pulls the shirt away and tucks it into his jeans.
“On the bike. We’re goin’ back.”
“I hate you,” I mutter, gripping the bike seat and throwing my leg over it.
“If you gave me what I wanted, we wouldn’t be going through this constant ‘me cat you mouse’ bullshit.”
“I’m not giving you anything until you tell me everything,” I say defiantly.
“Ain’t nothin’ to tell.”
“That’s a lie, Axel, and you know it.”
He glares at me, but takes a helmet and shoves it toward me. I’m thankful, in that moment, that it’s an open-face helmet and not a closed-face one, or I’d be in a world of pain right now. I shiver as a gust of wind whips past me, causing my damp clothes to feel cool against my skin. Axel climbs on the bike in front of me, and then turns back, uncuffing my wrists and pulling them around his waist. Then he cuffs them again. He’s not stupid. Then, without warning, he pulls out onto the road.
I close my eyes, unable to stop myself, and breath in the fresh, crisp air. Being on a bike is like being free. There are no words to describe the intense feeling of joy that swells in your chest as you soar through the wind, nothing surrounding you, nothing holding you down. It’s just you and the bike. Or, in my case, you, the bike, and the biker. I concentrate on the moment of freedom, instead of focusing on the way my lips are trembling from the cold, or the fact that I’m cuffed to a man that despises me.
Worse I’m trying to ignore the feeling of his warm, hard skin against my hands.
By the time we get back to
Axel’s compound, my nose is pounding, and my head feels heavy. Axel helps me off the bike, and leads me directly to his room where he spins me around and uncuffs me before taking the hem of my shirt, beginning to raise it. I screech loudly, and he snaps his hand back.
“What the fuck?” he growls.
“Don’t touch me!”
He narrows his eyes. “You want to stay here, in wet fuckin’ clothes?”
“No, but I don’t want you touching me.”
“Fine, I’ll go and get Cobra to do it. He did enjoy it last time.”
My mouth drops open, and I clench my fists. He knows he’s giving me a choice, and he knows I can’t refuse him. I’m cold, I’m wet, I don’t want to be in these clothes all night, and I certainly don’t want Cobra taking my clothes off again. God only knows what he did last time. Lowering my eyes, and clenching my jaw, I lift my arms.
Axel rolls his eyes angrily, as if my hesitation was stupid, and then he takes my shirt, lifting it over my head. I keep my eyes downturned as he moves his large body down mine, and grips my pants, lowering them too. I don’t want to look at him, or recognize that my body is having some sort of reaction to him being so close. My feelings for Axel confuse me, and I don’t know that I’ll ever begin to understand them.
When I’m in my underwear, he stands and tosses me a shirt. I pull it on, and it goes all the way down to my knees. It’s one of his. My heart stammers, and again, it makes no sense to me. He’s a monster to me, and yet my body is reacting every time he’s this near. I stand still as he chains me back up on the floor, and then he turns and I hear him ruffling around. A hand is shoved in front of my face a minute later, and I see he’s got some painkillers and a power bar. Shock fills my body as I reach out, and shakily take them.
Then he leaves the room without a word.
Just for something different.
~*~*~*~
The next few days are spent going over the same bullshit. He asks for the USB, I deny him, we get into an argument, and he storms out. By day four, I’m tired of the same crap. I’ve contemplated just giving it to him and leaving this place, but I’m not entirely convinced Axel will let me go once he gets what he wants. He’s a whole other person now. Someone I don’t know.