Gansett Island Boxed Set, Books 1-16

by Force, Marie

  “I don’t know.” Paul kicked at the dirt, frustration beating through him like an extra heartbeat. “I just feel like if he was here, it wouldn’t feel so chaotic and out of control. He’d know what to do.”

  “No, he wouldn’t. He’d be so heartbroken to see her this way. He wouldn’t have the first clue how to cope with it. Maybe this is why he died first. You ever think of that?”

  It had never crossed Paul’s mind that his supremely competent father would’ve been unable to cope. “No.”

  “We’ve elevated him to god status in our minds,” Alex said. “But in fact, he was just a man who loved his wife, and this would’ve killed him. It would kill me to see Jenny this way someday. I hope to God that never happens, because it would wreck me.”

  Alex had certainly given him something to think about other than the fact that his father would be disappointed in them.

  “You know what you need?” Alex asked.

  “I can hardly wait to hear this.”

  “A few days away from it all. Take Mom to the mainland and then go somewhere while she’s in the hospital. Do something fun. Hell, take Hope with you. She could use a break, too.”

  Paul was immediately hit with the unreasonable fear that Alex knew he’d kissed Hope. But how could he possibly know that? He’d been asleep when it happened. And it wasn’t like it was going to happen again, so what did it matter?

  Except… the idea of a few days away from it all with Hope as his companion had his mind racing with all sort of inappropriate images. That, right there, was dangerous thinking, so he shook it off.

  “I gotta get to it. See you at home later.”

  “Hey, Paul?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Don’t be too hard on yourself. We’re both doing the best we can in an awful situation. No one is judging us, least of all Dad. If anything, he’s watching over us and making sure we don’t lose our own minds.”

  “Probably.” It was a far better scenario than some he’d entertained recently. “Let me ask you something else…” He’d debated whether he should say anything about what Ethan had told him. On the one hand, he felt disloyal to Hope for telling anyone, but he was more loyal to his brother and mother.

  “Sure.”

  “Yesterday, Ethan told me his dad is in jail.”

  “What? Seriously? What for?”

  “He didn’t say, and I didn’t ask. I didn’t want to make a big thing of it with him, but it’s got me wondering.”

  “There was nothing about a spouse in jail on the background check we had done.”

  “Which leads me to more wondering.”

  “Wow.” Alex leaned against the handle of the rake he’d been using, seeming to need the support. “So what does this mean?”

  “It means that we have a fantastic nurse helping us with our mom who has a past that she doesn’t want anyone to know about.”

  “Maybe he went to jail after they split up.”

  “Maybe.”

  “Should we ask her about it?” Alex asked.

  “I really don’t want to do that.”

  “Neither do I. Are we taking chances with Mom’s safety by not looking into this further?”

  “I don’t think so. I trust Hope, and the guy’s in jail so it’s not like he’s about to come after her or anything.”

  “We need to keep a close eye on things.”

  “Agree.”

  “Let me know what you hear from David.”

  “I will.”

  “Could I ask you something?” Alex asked, seeming weary all of a sudden.

  “Of course,” Paul said, becoming resigned to getting nothing done that day.

  “Have you noticed anything…different…about Jenny lately?”

  “Different how?”

  “She’s quiet and withdrawn, which isn’t like her.”

  “I know it’s hard to sneak in conversation when you’re having constant sex, but have you asked her?”

  Alex grunted out a laugh. “That’s not all we do, and yes, I’ve asked her. Several times.”

  “And?”

  “She says everything’s fine, and that’s all she says. I don’t know what to do. I’m starting to wonder if she’s having second thoughts about the wedding and everything.”

  Incredulous, Paul shook his head. “No… No way. For some strange reason, she’s crazy about you. That much I know for sure.”

  “I thought I knew that for sure, too. But now… I don’t know anymore.”

  “For what it’s worth, I live with you two, and I haven’t sensed any sign of discontent in her. I’m not paying the same level of attention that you are, so I could’ve missed it, but all I see is happy and crazy in love. Is it possible you’re seeing trouble where there isn’t any?”

  “I’ve asked myself that same question, but I keep coming back to how glum she is every time we have to deal with the wedding.”

  “Try to find a way to get her to tell you why. It would suck to get to the big day thinking she has doubts about something.”

  “Yeah, I know. She’s due here soon. We’re meeting with Lizzie to go over final details.”

  “Sounds like a good opportunity to figure things out.”

  “Hope so.”

  “Try not to worry too much. Could just be wedding jitters.”

  Alex nodded. “I’ll see you at home.”

  “See you then.” Worried now about Alex, too, Paul returned to his truck and headed to the other side of the island to do a fall cleanup for a regular client. The mindless work gave him far too much time to think. He could only hope the situation with Jenny didn’t turn into a big disappointment for his brother. They had enough on their plates without more turmoil.

  Though he’d never wish his mother’s illness on anyone, least of all himself, sometimes he wondered what it would be like to be free from the routine worries of everyday life. He’d like to have a switch he could flip when he didn’t want to think about dementia or taxes or all the paperwork he’d let pile up in the office or the new equipment he needed to purchase before the spring.

  He’d like to be able to flip the switch and not think about how long it had been since he’d had sex or how much he’d liked kissing the lovely nurse who worked for them. He’d like to stop thinking about that, and he really wished he didn’t want to know so badly why Ethan’s father was in jail.

  After Paul left, Alex continued to work in the garden while trying not to slip into total panic mode over what was going on with Jenny. Other than the short time they spent apart at the start of their relationship, things between them had been remarkably easy. The connection they’d shared from the first minute they met had carried them through some rough times.

  He was well aware that theirs was her first significant relationship since she lost her fiancé in the 9/11 attacks on New York City. He’d tried to be respectful of her memories and to give her space to grieve on Toby’s birthday, their anniversary and the date of his death. At the same time, she’d stood by his side as his mother’s condition worsened, her support never wavering no matter how awful it got.

  And at the end of every long, trying day, he had her in his bed, and nothing in his life could compare to the sublime pleasure he found in her arms. He couldn’t get enough of her, and until recently, he’d thought the feeling was entirely mutual. Now he wasn’t so sure—and that scared him more than anything ever had.

  The crunch of tires on the driveway drew him out of the secret garden in the hedges that had been Mrs. Chesterfield’s pride and joy and was now his special project. Jenny brought her car to a stop in the circular driveway.

  Alex put down his rake, wiped his hands on his pants and went to meet her. She wore jeans that did great things for her ass and a denim shirt with the Martinez Lawn & Garden logo embroidered over the breast pocket. She’d turned their retail store into a profitable business and simplified his life and Paul’s with her organizational skills and management abilities.

  He’d be lost witho
ut her in every corner of his life, which was why he felt such an urgent need to know what was troubling her. More than anything, it frightened him that she was clearly keeping something from him, which was also unlike her. When he reached her car, he opened the door to help her out.

  “Hi there,” he said.

  “Hey. How’s your day going?”

  “It just got a whole lot better.”

  She smiled at him, but her eyes were sad.

  His heart ached at the thought of her being sad about something and not being able or willing to talk to him about it for whatever reason. “Ready for this?”

  “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

  “Everything all right, hon?”

  “Sure.” She hooked her hand into the crook of his elbow and let him lead her inside, where Lizzie James waited for them in the foyer. She looked glamorous in a navy suit and three-inch heels.

  Lizzie greeted them both with hugs and kisses.

  “Don’t get too close,” Alex said. “I’m dirty.”

  “You’re fine,” she said. “I’m so glad you’re here. I have so many new things to show you. Come in. Come in. Champagne?”

  “Not for me,” Alex said. He’d be asleep by two if he drank at noon.

  “I’ll have some,” Jenny said.

  They followed Lizzie into the room she used as an office, where a conference table was laden with flowers, mini cakes, place settings and other things he couldn’t easily identify. Chick stuff, he thought, keeping the sexist commentary to himself.

  Jenny took a close look at all of it, and he was relieved to see her taking an interest in the wedding they’d been anticipating for more than a year now. Hell, Lizzie’s husband, Jared, had bought this place and turned it into a wedding venue primarily because he and Jenny couldn’t find a place on the island to hold their wedding. Jared had taken their distress and turned it into yet another gold mine.

  Lizzie led them through every detail, from the ceremony that would be held on the back veranda overlooking the water to the pictures that would be taken in various locations around the estate, including their secret garden, to the reception that would be held in the downstairs rooms and on the back porch. It was a beautiful spot, and as Lizzie ran through the particulars, Alex could almost see it in his mind as it would unfold in three short weeks.

  That didn’t give him much time to figure out what was troubling his bride-to-be, a thought that filled him with an urgent need for answers. Once they’d dealt with all of Lizzie’s questions and taken a taste of the cake they’d chosen to make sure they still loved it, Lizzie declared them finished.

  “We’re in great shape with plenty of time for last-minute tweaks if you think of anything you’d like to change,” Lizzie said as she walked them out.

  “Thanks for everything,” Alex said.

  “Yes,” Jenny added, “thanks, Lizzie. You’ve made this so much easier than it would’ve been otherwise.”

  “Happy to help and can’t wait for your big day. Jared and I are looking forward to it.”

  “We’re still getting together this weekend, right?” Jenny asked her.

  “Wouldn’t miss it. We’ll see you then.”

  Chapter 4

  Jenny and Alex walked outside, and the bright sunshine had Alex reaching for the shades he’d pushed to the top of his head while they were inside. “Let’s go home for lunch.”

  She looked up at him. “How come?”

  “Because I want some time alone with my fiancée.”

  “We’re both working today.”

  “So? Are we too busy for lunch?”

  “Your mom and Hope are there and—”

  “I want to go to our home.”

  “Oh. Okay.”

  “Go on ahead. I’ll grab some food and meet you there.” He bent to kiss her and once again noted the slight hesitation before she returned his kiss. By the time this afternoon was over, he was going to get to the bottom of what was going on with her. If she told him she didn’t want to get married anymore—

  No, he thought, as he got into his truck and followed her out of the Chesterfield driveway. She couldn’t have changed her mind. If she told him she didn’t want to get married, he wasn’t sure how he would cope. After the incredible year they’d spent together, he’d never be able to face a future without her. Alex was fully prepared to fight for her, no matter what it took.

  He stopped at the grocery store and picked up sandwiches as well as a bottle of the iced tea she loved and headed for home. As he passed the retail store, he slowed to take a look at the activity, more out of habit than actual interest. The only thing he was interested in at the moment was Jenny.

  Behind the retail store, he hung a left onto a new dirt lane that had been created by the construction vehicles that had traversed the property while their house was being built. It was down to finish work now, and he was doing most of that himself. They were on schedule to move in before the wedding, and until recently, he’d been under the impression that she was looking forward to the next month as much as he was. Now he wasn’t so sure.

  Jenny was sitting on the front stairs waiting for him when he pulled up and shut off the truck. The two-story shingled colonial had four bedrooms, plenty of space for the family they hoped to have. He grabbed the bag from the store and got out to walk over to her. “Inside or out here?”

  “It’s so pretty outside today.”

  “Outside it is.”

  “Is it me or is the air different this month?”

  “It’s not you. Happens every September. The humidity disappears, the days are clear, and the nights are chilly. I love it.”

  “I do, too.” She accepted the turkey wrap he’d gotten for her and smiled at him when he produced the iced tea. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  They ate in silence, which had Alex’s roast beef sandwich landing like a brick in his stomach. His Jenny wasn’t quiet or withdrawn, especially not with him. He couldn’t take it anymore. He had to know what was bothering her. “We need to talk, babe.”

  She glanced at him, the trepidation in her expression tugging at his heart. “What’s wrong?”

  “That’s what I’d like to know.”

  “I’m not sure what you mean.”

  He had to force himself to say the words, to ask the question that had to be asked, even if the answer had the power to devastate him. “Do you still want to get married?”

  She gasped. “Why would you ask me that? Do you not want to?”

  “Jenny, God, all I want is to be married to you, but lately, you seem so…so sad and like you’re forcing yourself through the motions with the wedding.”

  To his dismay, she began to cry.

  Alex put his arm around her and gathered her in close to him, fortified by her reaction to his initial question. “Baby, whatever is wrong, we can fix it, but I can’t help if I don’t know what’s bothering you. Is it me? Did I do something?”

  She shook her head vigorously but was crying too hard to speak.

  “Jenny, sweetheart, I love you so much. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to make you happy. If you’d rather wait a while longer before we get married—”

  “No, that’s n-not what I want.”

  “Then what is it? Please tell me so I can help.”

  She buried her face in her hands as he continued to caress her back.

  “Talk to me. Whatever it is, I want to know.”

  Lifting her head and looking at him, she said, “I’m so sorry you thought I didn’t want to marry you. That’s not it. I swear. I love you, and I can’t wait to marry you.”

  Relieved to hear her say that so forcefully, he said, “Then why do you seem so unhappy? Is it the wedding itself?”

  Shaking her head, she sighed. “I know what you’re going to say. It seems ridiculous to me, but I can’t seem to help it.”

  “What can’t you help?”

  She wiped the tears from her face and looked at him. “I’ve been ri
ght here before, right where we are now. Less than a month until my wedding…”

  And then he knew exactly what was bothering her and felt terrible that he hadn’t realized it sooner. “Nothing’s going to happen, sweetheart.” He took hold of her hand. “I promise you. Nothing will happen. Not this time.”

  “You don’t know that. Every time you leave me, I’m afraid, and I hate myself for feeling that way.”

  “Then I won’t leave you again until after we say ‘I do.’”

  Smiling even as tears rolled down her cheeks, she shook her head. “That’s very sweet of you, but we both have work to do, and we can’t spend every minute together for the next three weeks.”

  “Yes, we can. If it means you’ll relax and stop worrying that something bad is going to happen, we can absolutely do that.”

  “It’s not necessary. You’re busy. I’m busy. I’m just being foolish.”

  “No, you’re not. I can’t bear the thought of you being afraid every minute that we’re apart for weeks. But you know what was even worse than that?”

  “What?”

  “Thinking you’d changed your mind about us. About me.”

  “Not for one second. I’m so sorry I made you worry about that.” She leaned her head on his shoulder. “I’m also thinking a lot about seeing Toby’s parents at the wedding and how that’ll feel for me—and for them. It’s been a while since I’ve seen them.”

  “You know they’re happy for you. They said so when you called to tell them we were engaged.”

  “Still… For them to see me marry someone else…” She raised her head to meet his gaze. “I want that day to be about you and me and no one else, but it’s not just about us.”

  “It’s never been just about us. Toby is part of us. Remember what I said when I proposed about how I wanted to honor him and his memory and what he meant to you?”

  “I could never forget that.”

  “We need to find a way to do that on our wedding day.”

  “We don’t have to—”

  “I know we don’t have to, but I want to. We should.”

  She blinked rapidly, trying to contain more tears. “What do you have in mind?”

  “You know how we’re doing the unity candle thing during the ceremony?”