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PandoraHearts ~Caucus Race~, Vol. 1

Page 6

by Shinobu Wakamiya


  “—”

  The longer he talked to this brother of his, the more bogged down he’d get. Knowing this, Gilbert let his silence answer for him and got to work choosing formal clothes.

  Dahlia had said that, if he didn’t mind, she would prefer to meet in town. As a general rule, when two noble houses were involved, it was normal to begin by greeting each other properly at one family’s house. However, Gilbert appreciated the lack of formality, and he’d had no objections.

  In addition, she’d said that she’d rather meet casually, without trying to put up a front for each other. The thought that, in that case, his ordinary clothes might be good enough had crossed Gilbert’s mind, but the roughness of those ordinary clothes had made him reconsider.

  Casual is good, but… I really am meeting her, huh…?

  At first, he’d thought about turning her down through a letter or something and ending it that way.

  He couldn’t even consider seeing a lady socially, and Gilbert didn’t care two pins for the House of Nightray’s reputation. In that case, a letter would be the simplest way to do things, and it would also be the easiest on his nerves.

  However, Gilbert had decided to meet her properly and turn her down. This had been partly due to his own serious nature, but even more to one of Oz’s teachings that he’d taken to heart:

  “Always treat women with kindness and sincerity!”

  As he thought back over this and that and grabbed a random suit:

  “Shall I help you pick out clothes?”

  Gilbert turned down Vincent’s teasing offer with a brusque “No need.”

  As he absently chose clothes, he thought about Dahlia. Had she spoken to him at a party? He didn’t remember it. Still, if she had, the fact that he’d forgotten it was rude in and of itself. On top of that, Gilbert had already made up his mind to turn her down.

  This is depressing…

  Gilbert didn’t understand women.

  That said, he was fairly sure that any woman would be hurt if she requested permission to formally socialize and was turned down.

  He did know that much. And tomorrow, he’d be doing exactly that.

  Even as he slipped into a gloomy mood with a fair measure of guilt mixed in, Gilbert roused himself.

  I’ll do it. I can do that much on my own now…!

  He’d already run several mental simulations since leaving Oz and Break at Pandora. After making such a dramatic declaration, he had to do it, no matter what. He told himself that letting those two get involved would make the situation much, much worse, so it was easier to tackle it himself. Gilbert seemed quite busy: depressed, head hanging, a black suit in hand, then muttering to himself, then looking up and rousing himself to action. Through it all, Vincent watched him lovingly.

  “Later, Vince.”

  Having calmed down, Gilbert was on his way out of the dressing room. Vincent yawned and lazily fluttered a hand at him.

  “Oh, that’s right. Gil…”

  Vincent spoke to Gilbert’s back. Gilbert didn’t turn.

  “What?”

  “Take care you don’t get eaten…”

  “???”

  “—All women are venemous spiders, you know.”

  “‘All’ is going too far.”

  With that reproving retort, Gilbert left the dressing room. As he walked down the corridor, his face cold and expressionless, questions swirled through his head.

  Why had his little brother said a thing like that? That all women were “venemous spiders.” …That they all had venom.

  No doubt some women were like that, Gilbert thought, but there were also women who weren’t. He knew one. A woman made entirely of kindness, cheer, and grace.

  A woman who was worlds apart from “venom.”

  Ada-sama—

  As he silently called her name, his heart grew warm. That wasn’t venom. On the contrary, it was medicine.

  That aside, because he was walking while absorbed in thought…

  Gilbert, who knew the Nightray manor like the back of his hand, got lost.

  “—Your precious Ada-sama is no exception, Gil.”

  Back in the dressing room, dozing, engulfed in drowsiness, Vincent murmured to himself.

  “…But don’t worry. I’ll get rid of any flies that come buzzing around you…”

  Just as he’d always done.

  A smile of dark joy crept over Vincent’s face. …But, he thought. From what Echo’s report had told him, this particular fly seemed a bit different from the flies that had come before it. In that case, it might be interesting to watch the situation play out, at least for a little while.

  As he thought, Vincent fell asleep.

  …And, finally…

  Echo, who’d entered the dressing room in search of her master, gazed at his peaceful, sleeping, smiling face. In a very, very small voice, she muttered:

  “……He looks evil when he sleeps.”

  5

  “I’m sorry. I’m afraid I’m not very good with formalities.”

  That was the first thing Dahlia said to Gilbert when they met the following day, at noon, in the park they’d designated as their meeting place.

  In person, Dahlia’s quiet air was even more pronounced than her photograph had suggested.

  When she stood, she seemed like a slender, shade-blooming flower that could be plucked easily by hand.

  To Gilbert, she seemed to stand quietly, self-effacingly, unfurling delicate petals in secret.

  When he thought back, comparing them, most of the women who’d made earlier requests to socialize had actively approached Gilbert. Even if they hadn’t, they’d eyed him appreciatively with bold, sticky stares. Both types had made Gilbert utterly miserable.

  Dahlia wasn’t like either.

  After she apologized, she didn’t seem to have anything to say. She looked down, turning her gaze from Gilbert, and fell silent.

  In its own way, this bewildered Gilbert.

  “…” Silent Dahlia.

  Maintaining a superficial calm, Gilbert kept his mouth shut.

  I-I have no idea how to deal with this!

  It was beginning to make him feel dizzy.

  On a weekday, at noon, in a corner of a sparsely populated park, an aristocratic couple sat facing each other in silence.

  Silence.

  Silence.

  Silence.

  A fresh breeze blew through the park, caressing the trees and setting the leaves rustling. But the two of them were—

  Silent.

  Silent.

  ……Silent.

  What am I supposed to do?! Is it all right to start turning her down now?! Gilbert asked himself.

  If anyone who’d known him for a long time and knew him well were to see him now—

  His face was pale, his mouth was drawn, and his internal confusion was gushing out all over the place.

  If this was how it was going to be, Gilbert thought, it was better to broach the subject right away and get it over with. He opened his mouth.

  “Um, listen—”

  “Gilbert-sama.”

  “……?! Wh-what is it?” She’d gotten the jump on him in a matter-of-fact voice, and he felt his heart jump guiltily.

  “Shall we stroll for a bit?”

  Dahlia looked up, smiling faintly. Bewildered, Gilbert could only nod.

  True, endlessly facing each other in silence this way was strange. Side by side, the two of them started down a footpath that wove through the wide park.

  However, once they’d started walking, Dahlia fell silent again. For his part, Gilbert was badly flustered, and the words wouldn’t come. As they walked, they kept a subtle distance between them, a space just large enough for a child. What in the world is this? Gilbert thought.

  Not good…

  He thought desperately. He thought, but:

  I…have no idea how to get started!

  Gilbert’s mind was a small boat tossed by raging waves.

  Two people, st
rolling along in silence.

  “I’m sorry, Gilbert-sama. —Have I inconvenienced you?”

  “Huh?”

  Dahlia had spoken rather abruptly, but Gilbert somehow managed to keep his voice from cracking when he responded.

  “My father…decided the matter for me. I didn’t know what to do, either.”

  Dahlia’s words reached Gilbert’s ears, then slowly sank into his heart.

  At Gilbert’s sudden unresponsiveness, Dahlia tilted her head slightly, perplexed.

  Finally, on a sigh, Gilbert said, “—I see.” As far as his actual feelings were concerned, those words had brought him relief so potent that he very nearly sank to the ground.

  This sort of thing wasn’t uncommon in aristocratic society. Women in particular often found themselves in marriages that had been orchestrated without regard for their wishes.

  Unlike the previous cases, Dahlia hadn’t asked for permission to see Gilbert of her own accord.

  That alone made Gilbert feel as if he’d been rescued.

  “That is what happened…”

  At Gilbert’s murmur, Dahlia glanced at him.

  “So you’d settled on your answer from the beginning.”

  “Huh?”

  “You seem terribly relieved.”

  “Erg.” Busted.

  “You were thinking of how to turn me down without hurting me, weren’t you?”

  Was it that obvious?! Gilbert thought in disbelief.

  This was awful. He’d wavered and agonized, and on top of that, instead of saying it himself, he’d made the other party pick up on his intent and say it for him.

  Gilbert wasn’t at all quick on the uptake where relations between the sexes were concerned, but he did know just how unmanly and pathetic that had been. It depressed him so much he felt like falling to his hands and knees.

  But before he collapsed into depression, there was one thing he had to do. Gilbert stopped in his tracks.

  A moment later, Dahlia also stopped and looked at him. “Gilbert-sama?”

  “…I’m sorry.”

  He made a heartfelt apology. At his words, Dahlia shook her head.

  “Please don’t apologize, Gilbert-sama.”

  “No, I’ve been terribly rude to you.”

  Conscientiously, Gilbert bowed his head low.

  This gentlemanly, chivalrous attitude seemed to startle Dahlia. Her eyes widened slightly.

  Then, wondering a bit, she said, “You don’t quite seem like a man from one of the great noble families, Gilbert-sama.”

  “Yes, I know. See, I wasn’t always— I-I mean, I have not always been—”

  “…Please don’t worry about it.”

  “???”

  “You don’t have to be formal with me.”

  Dahlia giggled as she spoke. There was something friendly and a bit childlike about her smile.

  “Okay.”

  Still a bit bewildered, Gilbert responded with a wry smile. He felt very apologetic toward Dahlia.

  Lying in bed the night before, he’d run through all sorts of ways to turn her down. He’d felt compelled to get rid of Dahlia as soon as possible, treating her as if she were some sort of contaminant.

  Gilbert was ashamed of himself. At the same time, he remembered his brother’s words: All women are venemous spiders.

  The thought that he’d been right, that there really were women who weren’t, warmed his heart.

  Even though it hadn’t been very long since he’d met her in person, Gilbert was fully convinced of that.

  “Only… Do you think you could spend just a bit longer with me?”

  Dahlia sounded apologetic.

  “If I go home too readily, Father will scold me…”

  “…Ah, I see.”

  It all made sense to Gilbert now. In aristocratic society, when parents arranged for socialization and marriage, it was usually done with strategic intent. Dahlia probably couldn’t just say, “Oh, that’s all right,” and go home simply because Gilbert wasn’t keen on the idea. Besides, it was easy enough to give her what she needed.

  “If you’re sure I’ll do,” Gilbert said. Dahlia smiled and nodded.

  “Thank you very much. …That really is more like you, Gilbert-sama.”

  When Gilbert looked perplexed:

  “Being casual,” Dahlia said, pleasantly.

  “It’s a bit of a walk, but there’s a lovely fountain up ahead, with benches beside it.”

  Dahlia pointed down the footpath as she spoke, and the two of them set off again.

  Apparently this was the first time Dahlia had been to this park, but she’d investigated it beforehand.

  If possible, she’d told Gilbert, she’d like to sit and use up a bit more time talking. Her hesitant tone made Gilbert realize that she was being painstakingly considerate of him, and that made him feel even more apologetic.

  Still, he thought, …somehow, I did manage to settle this on my own.

  True, he’d been saved by Dahlia’s perceptiveness, but at least he hadn’t borrowed help from anyone.

  He was a little proud of that.

  Walking beside Gilbert, Dahlia spoke, looking up at the trees that lined the footpath.

  “I don’t often leave the house, you see. This all feels very new to me.”

  “Yes, you do seem like a bit of a homebody— Uh, I mean… Sorry.”

  “No, you’re right. My father worries that I’ll never get myself married off… Oh no, I’m sorry.”

  Having both said a bit too much, they both apologized, both smiling uncomfortably.

  As they walked, Gilbert mentioned that he was living on his own, and Dahlia’s eyes went wide. Apparently the idea of a member of one of the four great dukedoms living alone in a lower-class neighborhood really was startling. As she looked at Gilbert, Dahlia seemed impressed.

  “You’re really amazing, Gilbert-sama. Living without help from anyone…”

  “No, it was just too uncomfortable to stay in that house.”

  Once the words were out, he realized he might have said a bit too much again. He’d never told anyone he wasn’t very close to his true feelings on that subject. He wished it hadn’t come up. Telling her the reason would only make the atmosphere more awkward.

  Dahlia was watching Gilbert, her mouth closed. Gilbert worried she suspected him of something.

  However, Dahlia said, “I see…” Then she smiled gently. “If you live alone, does that mean you cook for yourself, too?”

  “Huh? …Oh, yeah. A bit.”

  “That’s wonderful. I’ve never even set foot in a kitchen.”

  She must have sensed that he hadn’t wanted her to ask. Gilbert was secretly moved by the way Dahlia had changed the subject for him. What a nice person, he thought.

  Gilbert had completely relaxed. He and Dahlia chatted. Unless he was with someone he was close to, Gilbert tended to be taciturn, but now, unusually for him, he talked about this and that. Since he wasn’t able to talk about Pandora activities, they mostly discussed trivial, everyday things.

  During the conversation, Oz’s name came up.

  “Oz…sama?” Dahlia repeated the name.

  Oops, Gilbert thought.

  As far as the general public was concerned, Oz—Oz Vessalius, of the House of Vessalius—had died ten years ago.

  Only a few aristocrats with ties to Pandora knew that Oz had returned from the Abyss.

  For that reason, Gilbert had to pretend he’d meant someone else with the same name.

  “Yes— He’s a…friend,” he explained, awkwardly.

  Oz was his master. Ordinarily, he’d never dream of calling him a friend, even in jest. He wanted to declare “Oz is my master” to everyone, at all times, with pride and confidence. He wanted to boast about it.

  Gilbert’s heart was leaden with guilt and remorse.

  As Gilbert answered painfully, his eyebrows drawn together, Dahlia looked a bit puzzled, but she responded, “I see. What sort of person is he?”


  At her casual question, Gilbert fell silent. How could he describe Oz to a third party?

  I’m proud to call him my master. The words were on the tip of his tongue.

  He desperately swallowed them back down, searching for some other, harmless expression.

  He thought, and thought, and…

  “…He’s…hard on the heart, in all sorts of ways.”

  “Is he!”

  Then Gilbert told her about how Oz kept him scrambling on a daily basis. He hadn’t intended it to sound particularly funny, but at each little anecdote, Dahlia giggled merrily.

  He felt as if she was probably laughing at the way Oz had him twisted around his little finger, but somehow it didn’t bother him.

  Once he’d more or less finished talking, Dahlia said, “You really treasure this Oz-sama, don’t you.”

  Gilbert, who hadn’t expected to hear that, responded with a startled “Huh?”

  “Hee-hee! I can tell. When you talk about him, it’s as plain as day, Gilbert-sama.”

  Even as he felt a mild jolt at the idea that he was so easy to read, he had no choice but to acknowledge it.

  “…Is that right,” Gilbert answered, simply.

  Talking about himself and Oz had begun to feel awkward, and Gilbert changed the subject.

  This time, it was Gilbert’s turn to ask Dahlia how she spent her days. However, Dahlia told him she spent all day reading, and that her routine seldom varied. It seemed to Gilbert, though, that this sort of quiet life did not particularly suit her.

  After that, they talked of all sorts of things: the books Dahlia liked and things that had happened to Gilbert while he was living on his own.

  The air around them was soft and warm.

  This isn’t a bad way to relax, once in a while, Gilbert thought.

  Of course—

  He knew there was really no place for him in a world this gentle.

  Somehow…just being with this woman is really calming, Gilbert thought.

  At length, as they walked down the footpath, Gilbert caught sight of two women up ahead.

  The women were crouched down with their backs to him.

  By the look of things, they seemed to be in some sort of trouble. This park drew many lower-class visitors, and the flamboyant dresses the ladies wore stood out rather sharply. Dahlia also noticed the pair; sounding a bit worried, she asked, “Have they fallen, do you think?”

 

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