by J. M. Walker
“The baby, silly.” She laughed, patting my hand. “I understand you’ve been busy. It’s okay. I forgive you for forgetting.”
“Forgetting what?” I asked but I knew. Fuck me, I knew.
Her eyes welled, her smile widening even more. “I’m pregnant.”
I paused. Pregnant.
Claire was fucking pregnant. I didn’t need to do the math to know that it was mine. I wasn’t stupid. Claire may have had her issues but even she wouldn’t have lied about that. She wanted me. In every way she could have me.
“We’re going to be a happy family—”
“No.” I shot to my feet, glaring down at her. “Listen to me good.”
“No.” She jumped from the couch and shoved me back.
I raised an eyebrow, surprised at her sudden strength.
“You listen to me good, Brett.” She pointed at me. “I love you. I’ve loved you while you fuck that little slut. I loved you while her brother was deep inside of me. Does that make you jealous? Knowing that another man got to me?”
“No,” I said matter-of-factly.
She flinched.
“Are you sure the baby isn’t Ethan’s?”
Her brows narrowed. “I wouldn’t be here if it was.”
Fuck my life. “What the hell do you want from me then? Money? A place to stay? Tell me.”
“I want you to leave her.” Claire sat back down, placing a hand on her lower stomach.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me. Why the hell would I do that?”
“Because I’ll go to the media and tell them you raped me and now I’m pregnant.” She shrugged, like it was no big deal. “Maybe I’ll show them the pictures I took of the bruises you left on my body too.”
My world fell from beneath my feet. This was not happening. Not now. Not after Evvie and were finally moving in the right direction. My heart raced. My blood pounded in my ears. “Why?” It was all I could ask.
“Because I love you. We’re meant to be together.”
“You could have anyone.” As much as I hated her, she was an attractive woman. She could have men lining up at her feet if she opened herself to them but instead, she latched her claws into my soul.
“I know.” She stood from the couch. “But I want you.”
She said it like that was it, that I should just agree and be done with Evvie. But I couldn’t.
“I’m not leaving her,” I said, heading to the bar at the other end of my office.
“I didn’t think you would agree willingly.”
I stopped in my tracks, turning to her.
“That’s why I had this drawn up.” Claire pulled a piece of paper from her bag and handed it to me. “If you don’t agree to leave Evvie, I will make sure this gets published,” she said, walking toward me and handing me the paper.
It was a typed up letter to our local newspaper accusing me of shit I had never done. Rape. Beating her. Forcing her to do things that bordered on harmful to her and to me. I never raped her but the others, I couldn’t deny it because she asked for it. She made me hurt her. Our sex was dark. Too dark. And it scared the shit out of me that she wanted it that way, so things needed to end.
But this…this was too much.
“You can’t do this,” I muttered, slumping onto the couch.
“I can. I’ve been in contact with my lawyer. If you don’t leave Evvie, he’s been instructed to alert every media outlet in the country. Your name and face will be blasted everywhere as a sex offender. You will go to jail. If you don’t leave her. But if you do—” she smiled. “—Then everything will be as it should be and we can live as one happy family. Until then.” She blew me a kiss and headed to the door. “I have eyes watching. I will know if you don’t leave her, Brett. I love you.” And with that, she left.
Shit. Shit shit shit.
What the fuck was I going to do?
Grabbing my keys, I did the only thing I could. I sent Ian a quick text, letting him know the situation. Besides him being my manager, he had become a fast friend and I knew I could count on him to hold things down at the club while I ended the happiness that I didn’t deserve.
Driving over to Evvie’s didn’t take as long as I would have liked. I parked in the parking lot, gripping the steering wheel. How could I let this happen?
Finally mustering up the courage, I pulled myself from the vehicle and made my way to Evvie’s apartment. I slipped in through the door as someone came out, the lack of security still pissing me off, even though I should have been used to it by now.
Taking the elevator, I thought of all the things I would say to her but I knew it wouldn’t come out right. I didn’t know what else to do. This was it. It was the only way. It was all that made sense.
Once I reached her floor, I took a deep breath and trudged down the hall to her door. Not bothering to knock, I let myself in and headed to her room.
Kane and Ethan had been sitting on the couch with Evvie. I was sure they would have questions but, right now, I couldn’t deal with them.
I started pacing back and forth.
“Brett?”
I slipped my hands into my pockets, my body stiff.
“Brett?” Evvie repeated, her voice gentle.
I glanced her way that time.
She chewed her bottom lip, her brows set in a deep frown.
Before I knew what I was doing, I was across the room and crushed my mouth to hers. The kiss was hard, bruising, as I shoved my tongue between her lips.
She wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me tight against her.
Breaking the kiss, I leaned my forehead against hers, taking deep shallow breaths.
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s my fault,” I mumbled. “My fucking fault.”
“What’s your fault?”
I shook my head. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
“Why are you sorry?” she asked, her voice cracking.
I grabbed her hands, kissed her knuckles and then her mouth. “Just know that I’m sorry.” My stomach twisted.
“Talk to me,” she pleaded.
“I love you. I will always love you. I love every piece of you. You are the best fucking thing that’s ever happened to me.” I couldn’t meet her gaze. I couldn’t see the pain in her eyes, so I just continued kissing her knuckles.
“Why does this sound like goodbye?”
I looked at her that time and cupped her face. My eyes moved back and forth over her features, memorizing her. Engraining her in my damn soul.
“You’re scaring me.” She grasped my wrists. “What happened?”
I took a deep breath before placing a hard kiss on her mouth. “I’m breaking up with you.”
She gasped, shoving away from me. “Excuse me?”
I let go of her that time and headed to the door.
Evvie stepped in front of me, blocking me from running.
“Move,” I said, my voice firm.
“No.” She gripped my shirt. “What the hell is going on, Brett?”
I looked away. “I think we should see other people.”
“Why? I love you. You love me. Why would we see other people?”
I let out a heavy breath before pinning her with a hard stare. “I cheated on you.” I didn’t like the taste of those words on my tongue. “Those pictures? They were recent. I fucked Claire while being with you.” My voice came out monotonously. Lies. So many damn lies.
“I don’t believe you.”
Something inside of me snapped. I slammed Evvie up against the door and leaned into her face. “I don’t want to be with you.”
“You’re a fucking liar,” she gritted out. “Why are you doing this? What happened? We can work through—”
“No,” I yelled, punching a fist against the wall beside her head. “Forget about me. Move on.” You deserve better. “I’m not worth it.”
“Yes, you are,” she cried, pushing me. “You are worth it. I need you. You said you would fight for me. Are we not worth
fighting for anymore?”
My jaw clenched. “No.”
Her eyes welled, her mouth opening and closing.
What I would give to take away her pain but this was for the best. It was to protect her. She didn’t want to be with someone who had demons. Who went to bed every night wishing the darkness would swallow him whole so the nightmares would stop.
“What happened?” she finally asked.
“I decided I’m not ready for a relationship.” I was going to hell. I took a step back and walked to her dresser, fingering a photo of the two of us in a small picture frame. Evvie had a huge smile on her face and I was kissing her cheek. I remembered that moment like it had just happened the day before. Evvie had drank too much wine and took a picture of us. We were happy.
“You are ready,” she insisted. “We’re both ready. We’re ready for us.” She walked up behind me and placed a hand on my back.
I spun on her, grabbing her wrist. “No,” I snarled. “I am not fucking ready. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll forget me. Forget everything.”
“If you’re not going to fight, then I will.” She pushed me back against her dresser.
My dick twitched. Her dominance surprisingly turned me on.
“I love you. I’ve always loved you. Yes, we have our issues but no relationship is perfect, Brett. I don’t know why you’re lying but I need you.”
“I’m not fucking lying. Get it through your head, Evvie. I cheated on you. I don’t want to be with you. I’m not a one-woman man.”
“We were fine last night.” She gripped my shirt tight in her hands. “What happened?”
I chuckled. I actually fucking laughed. I was losing my ever-loving mind. “You obviously don’t know me that well.”
“You’re a coward.”
“I’m not a fucking coward.” I glared at her. Even though it was the truth, I still didn’t like being called one.
“No? You’re using any excuse to get out of our relationship but you’re not telling me why. I don’t understand.” Her chin trembled.
“You don’t have to.” I pushed past her.
Evvie grabbed my arm.
“Let go of me,” I demanded, my voice filled with warning. If she didn’t, this wouldn’t end well for either of us.
“I don’t know what happened but I’m here for you. We can work through this together—”
Suddenly, I was on her. I pulled her against me and crushed my mouth to hers, slamming her against her dresser. Items crashed to the floor, my hands and body were all over her. This wasn’t how it should be. Evvie wasn’t the type of woman who deserved to be fucked like an animal all because I was a pussy and didn’t know how to think with anything but my dick.
She cupped my nape, digging her nails into my skin like she was trying to claw her way beneath it.
This was it. This was goodbye. And as I fucked her against her dresser, the only thing I cared about was leaving my mark on her soul.
“YOU’RE A PUSSY . A motherfucking asshole who’s lucky I don’t bury him right now.”
I looked up at Kane glaring down at me. The guy was huge and even he made me a little nervous. He and Evvie were best friends, so I let him have it. I deserved it.
“What the hell happened?” he demanded. “One moment you were fine, Evvie was walking around with a huge smile on her face and you were actually nice for once, and then suddenly that stopped. Why?”
Claire motherfucking Morgan. That was why. After I left Evvie’s a week ago, I got drunk off my ass and passed out in bed. The night was fuzzy and I couldn’t remember shit.
“I respect the fact that you’re best friends with Evvie, but that’s between her and I.” I wasn’t in the mood for this and I didn’t want to have to hit Kane. He was a large fucker.
“Not when I hear her crying herself to sleep every damn night it’s not.” He pointed at me. “Tell me what the fuck happened.”
Rubbing the back of my neck, I tried massaging out some of the tension. The pain sliced through me.
“I fucked up,” was all I said.
I had seen Claire earlier that morning. She had a shit-eating grin on her face knowing she got what she wanted, but I still refused to actually be with her. Take care of the baby? My baby? I would cherish him or her and give them the life I never had, but it didn’t mean I had to be with their mother.
“You need to talk to Evvie.”
“And say what?” I stood from my chair and headed to the bar. Pouring myself a tumbler of whiskey, I shot it back. The amber liquid burned its way down my throat and settled deep in the pits of my stomach. Pouring myself another drink, I turned to Kane. “What should I tell Evvie? That I love her? That I miss her? That I fucked up and no matter how hard I tried pushing Claire away, it didn’t do shit?” I scoffed, taking a sip. “She already knows all of that.”
“You have to do something,” Kane insisted. “She’s been in her room for a week. She hasn’t left since you came over.”
“She works tonight. She has to leave her room at some point.” I turned away from him, pretending I didn’t care when really it gutted me.
“Brett.” Kane let out a heavy sigh. “Listen, I like you. I respect you but, right now, you’re being a dick. Evvie comes first. She loves you. I hate to butt my nose in—”
“Then don’t,” I snapped at him, slamming back another shot.
“I hope you know what you gave up.”
The door closed, the sound piercing my heart.
“Fuck,” I yelled, throwing the glass across the room. It shattered, the pieces falling to the floor much like the life I had worked so hard at building.
As much as I wanted to wallow in my own self-pity, I couldn’t. Kane was right and I sure as hell knew what I gave up, but I didn’t know how to fix it.
A soft knock sounded on the door, interrupting the noise in my head.
“Yeah?” I called out, grabbing a broom and dust pan from the closet.
“Hey, Brett.”
My head whipped around. “Keisha.” Throwing the items on the floor, I was across the room in three strides and picked my sister up in a bear hug.
She laughed, hugging me back. “I guess you missed me.”
“Fuck yeah, I’ve missed you.” I hugged her small frame even tighter. It had been months since I’d last seen her. Picking her up, I spun her around.
“Brett,” she squealed. “Put me down you ass.”
I laughed, doing as I was told. “What are you doing here?”
“I was in town.” She hooked her arm in mine. “Is this a bad time?”
“No.” I kissed her forehead. “It’s perfect timing.”
Her smile grew. “Good. I missed you, big brother.”
“I missed you too.” I pulled her to the couch. “How’s Garrith?” Garrith Jamison had been my best friend growing up until recently when I stopped staying in touch.
“He’s good.” Keisha turned to me. “How are you doing? I hear there’s a lady in your life.”
I raised an eyebrow. “How the hell could you hear that?”
She tapped her temple. “Women’s intuition.” She pointed to the pile of glass on the floor. “I also know you didn’t throw that at the wall because you won the lottery.”
I huffed, sitting back against the couch and crossed my arms under my chest. “Is it that obvious?”
She mirrored my pose. “Nah. I just know you.” She looked up at me, her dark brown eyes staring back at me with concern. “Want to talk about it?”
“You didn’t come here to listen to my doom and gloom shit.” But talking to someone who was unbiased would be nice.
“I’m your sister. Someone you haven’t seen in forever.” She gently shouldered me. “Tell me what’s going on. Maybe I can help.”
Before I could stop myself, the words tumbled from my lips. I told her everything. Even down to the nitty gritty with Claire. When I was done, I paused, half expecting her to look at me with judgment.
“You
need to talk to her,” Keisha said instead.
“That’s what I’ve been told,” I muttered.
“Listen.” She placed a hand gently on my arm. “Relationships are hard. I sure as hell know that.” She smiled softly, rubbing her stomach. “But if you love each other like you say you do, you can work through this. But I really want to kick Claire’s ass.”
“You don’t need that shit on your…wait…are you…”
Keisha winked.
I pulled her into my arms. “That’s fucking amazing. It’s about time Garrith manned up and put a baby in you.”
She laughed. “You men and wanting to fill us with babies. Garrith is already talking about a second one and the first one isn’t even out yet.”
“He’s a good man.” I released her, cupping her face. “I’m happy for you.”
“Thank you.” She covered my hand. “Now talk to her. For me?”
“Fine.” I took a deep breath. “I will.”
***
Once I made sure my sister was seated at a table with a meal in front of her, I got ready to confront Evvie.
“You’ll be fine.” Keisha patted my hand, shoving a forkful of steak into her mouth. “God, if I wasn’t taken, I’d marry your cook.” She moaned.
I chuckled, shaking my head, and left her to her meal. My heart felt lighter, my back not as stiff as before. Seeing my sister did that. Although we were only stepbrother and stepsister, it didn’t put any hindrance on our relationship. She had been there for me through it all.
Making my way to the bar, I noticed how the staff glanced my way every so often. I had heard the whispers. The rumors. If I cared, I would have fired everyone and hired new staff just to prove a point, but I didn’t. I was tired and I needed to talk to Evvie. I wasn’t sure what I would say but I had to make this better. Easier.
When I approached the bar, Evvie was placing her phone in her back pocket. She let out a heavy sigh, her chin trembling.
“Evvie, what’s wrong?” I asked, my first instinct was to go to her and pull her into my arms. But I didn’t. I couldn’t for fear that she would only shove me away.
She jumped, glancing my way. “Nothing.”
My eyes narrowed, noting the piece of paper in her hand, and snatched it from her. It had a room number and a hospital name. “I’ll take you.”