The Vampire Awakenings Bundle: Books 1-5

by Davies, Brenda K.

  She stared at him, crying silently as her hands shook in her lap. He walked over to the window and stared out the blinds as he gathered his strength before turning to face her again. "If you decide to leave, I won't blame you, but no matter what you cannot reveal to anyone what I am going to tell you. If you do, I don't know if I can protect you. I don't think I could stop them from coming after you. They would kill me to get to you. Do you understand me?"

  "I don't want anything to happen to you," she whispered tremulously.

  "Are you worried about me?" he asked incredulously.

  "Yes."

  He closed his eyes and turned back to the window. Anguish filled him, and a love greater than he ever thought he could experience engulfed him. "You know," he said. "I never thought I could love anyone like I love you. I never thought I would meet a person like you. I didn't believe they existed."

  "Liam—"

  "No one is going to harm me, Sera. You just need to promise me you won't tell anyone, please."

  "I won't tell anyone anything you don't want me to."

  He felt as if his skin was flayed away and his soul bared as he turned back to her. "I'm a vampire."

  The words hung heavy in the air as she stared at him. Then, she began to laugh. Hitching in a deep breath, she managed to stifle her laughter as she stood. Her eyes blazed with fury, and her jaw clenched as she turned to him. "You know, there is something wrong with you. I've had it. If you don't want to tell me the truth, then don't. But don't pull this bull with me. I'm going to the police!"

  "Sera—"

  "No!" she shouted. "You have done nothing but lie to me. I've had it. I've had it with you! You've won whatever game you were playing. You've won! You can run around and tell everyone you made a fool of me; I don't care!" She turned and stormed toward the door. "You rotten bastard!"

  He moved swiftly across the room. He was ahead of her before her hand stretched for the knob. She froze, unable to believe he’d moved so fast. Suddenly, her mind flashed back to the red in his eyes, and the killing rage radiating from him last night. The lack of blood on Jacob, on her sheets. For a moment, she wanted to believe him. For a moment, she did.

  Then her mind snapped back into place, back into reality. There was no such thing as vampires. They did not exist. He had done nothing but lie to her from the beginning. She couldn't believe this insanity. It was impossible. Lifting her chin, she glared at him, her eyes full of a ferocity that rocked him.

  "You can't go to the police. I'm not lying," he said coldly.

  "Get out of my way!" she spat as her hands clenched at her sides.

  He stared at her as he took a step closer. "Sera..."

  She took a couple of steps back. Her annoyance vanished as despair washed over her. She'd had too much. She simply couldn't take anymore. "Stop, please," she begged. "Just stop it. I can't take this anymore. Do you have any idea how much you've hurt me? All I wanted was the truth. Even though you killed him, I didn't care! I would have helped you. I would have done anything for you! Just leave me alone, let me go."

  She stood with her head in her hands as her shoulders shook with her sobs. He grabbed hold of her hands and forced them away from her face. "I'm not lying to you," he growled.

  She lifted her eyes and froze. His eyes were a scarlet shade of red. His beautiful face twisted into something unrecognizable, something unreal and horrifying. His long, inhuman teeth hung over his bottom lip. They looked deadlier and sharper than any lion's teeth.

  Her eyes widened, her jaw dropped, and then she screamed. He slammed his hand over her mouth, silencing her before she could make much of a sound. Liam wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her flush against his chest. She clawed at his hand and kicked backward with such frenzy he almost lost his hold.

  Tightening his grip, he lifted her off the floor. Her body shook and heaved as she dug into his skin. "Sera, stop it," he grated in her ear. "Stop."

  She continued to scream against his hand as her chest heaved with her inhalations. He hissed as her teeth sank into his palm. "Damn it!"

  He dropped her onto the bed. She bounced back up and scrambled to get away. He grabbed hold of her ankle and pulled her back as she cried out. "No!"

  He clamped his hand over her mouth again. Her small fists beat impotently against his chest as he straddled her. Seizing hold of her wrists, he clamped them firmly together against her stomach. Her muffled cries became softer as tears spilled down her face.

  She stopped fighting and went still beneath him. Her nostrils flared as she watched him through terrified eyes. He kept his hand over her mouth while he tried to steady his breathing and the pounding of his heart. This was not the way he wanted this to go.

  "I'm going to take my hand away. Don't scream, Sera. I mean it."

  She nodded, and he eased his hand from her mouth. She inhaled deeply; a tremor raced through her as she shivered beneath him. Blood stained the corners of her lips, his blood. He wiped it away gently. She winced and turned her head from his touch.

  His head bent in defeat. Of course, she would be repulsed by him. He was a monster. But he hoped maybe, just maybe, she would accept him. He knew now she wouldn't. The knowledge ripped his soul to shreds.

  "You're the one who wanted the truth!" he spat.

  She flinched as his words tore at her. Yes, she wanted the truth, but who in their right mind could ever imagine this was it? That he was a monster and a killer. No one could. No one who was sane anyway, and right now she wasn't entirely sure she still was.

  She couldn't stop the mind-numbing horror filling her. "You're hurting me," she croaked out.

  His grip on her wrists eased, but he didn't release her. "Look at me, Sera."

  She bit her bottom lip as she took another shuddery breath. She forced herself to turn her head, open her eyes, and look at him. The monster was gone. It was Liam hovering over her, his green eyes haunted with turmoil. His jaw clenched so firmly a muscle in his cheek jumped wildly. Even though the creature was gone, he was still deadly.

  Another tremor raced through her. She had seen the ferocity in his vivid red eyes, the snarl twisting his features into something inhuman, something she didn't recognize. He could kill her in the space of a heartbeat. Rip her throat out and drain the blood from her before she even had a chance to scream, let alone struggle.

  He made no move to attack her.

  The realization gradually sank in and eased the tension in her muscles. Warmth, and love, suddenly flashed through his eyes, melting the coldness in them, making him more human. A sob broke from her. She bit her lip to try and stifle it. The coldness settled back over his gaze and instantly shut out any warmth.

  "Now, are you going to listen to me?" He waited for her to nod her acknowledgment. "Good, because not only does my life revolve around this, but so does yours, and so do four others I care about. Do you understand?" She could only manage another weak nod. "You can walk out of my life, Sera; I will understand if you do, but you cannot breathe a word of this to anyone. Do you hear me?"

  She took a deep breath and nodded. She would have told him anything he wanted to hear. If there was any chance of her being able to escape, then she would do whatever it took.

  "Good. Because if you do, I don't know if I can protect you."

  "You'd kill me?" she breathed.

  The wrath emanating from his eyes caused her to recoil. Instinctive terror surged through her, and she began to thrash in his grasp. His hands tightened on her wrists as he held her in place. Pain shot down her arms; she cried out as tears sprang to her eyes. His grasp instantly loosened.

  "Sera, stop it. I don't want to hurt you." His words sank slowly in, and her resistance ceased. She lay, panting beneath him, as she met his sincere gaze. "I told you I would protect you no matter what, and I meant it. But there are others. I can't stop them all. I can't let you go if you're going to tell anyone."

  Sera laughed as she shook her head. "Who would believe me anyway, Liam? They would lock me i
n a nuthouse if I started talking about a vampire boyfriend in a frat house."

  "Believe it or not, some people would believe you. We can't afford to have that happen, okay?"

  "Yes."

  "Do I have your promise you're not going to say anything?"

  "If I say no, what will you do to me?"

  His eyes reflected his torment. "Take you away from here, keep you away from people. I would hate to do it, Sera, but I can't risk our lives. You may grow to hate me for it, you probably hate me now, but it's something I'm willing to live with. As long as you stay alive and safe, then nothing else matters."

  There were no lies within his eyes. There was only a desperate need for her to understand and concede to his will. She couldn’t believe he would let her leave this room if she gave him her word not to say anything. What kind of monster would do that?

  Eventually, she realized he wasn't a monster. He was still her Liam. He could have killed her many times already, but he hadn't. He didn't have to let her go. He could make her do whatever he wanted. He was ten times stronger than she was, and she was certain she hadn't even seen a hint of what he was truly capable of doing. She didn't hate him; she didn't think she could ever hate him. She was terrified of him right now, as she had every right to be, but she didn't hate him.

  "Do you promise Sera?"

  "Yes," she whispered.

  His head bent as he took a deep, shuddery breath. He released his hold on her and sat back. She levered her arms beneath her and scooted back on the bed as he stood and walked away. Rubbing her tender, bruised wrists, she watched him in disbelief. He was going to let her go.

  "You can leave."

  His back was rigid as he stood by the desk. He didn't turn as she climbed unsteadily to her trembling legs. She looked at the door and then back over to him. "You're letting me go?" she asked in disbelief.

  Liam closed his eyes as pain seared through his entire body. "Yes," he grated. "I don't expect you to stay with me, Sera. I know what I am, what I can never give you."

  "And what is that?" she whispered.

  He couldn't look at her; she was the only bright thing in his entire joyless life. When she left, she would take all the light with her, and leave him to drown in the dark. But he couldn't expect her to stay. He was a demon. He survived on blood. He could destroy her with a single flick of his wrist. He had nothing but blood and death to offer her.

  "A life, Sera, I can never offer you a life. I won't age; I won't die. I can offer you nothing. Now go, before I change my mind and decide I don't care about anything, but keeping you with me no matter what it means, no matter how you feel about it."

  Sera's gaze traveled back to the door. Her heart was ripping to shreds in her chest. She had never known such physically emotional suffering in her life. She couldn't breathe through the constriction in her chest; she could barely see through the tears burning her eyes. If she walked out of this room and left him, then a part of her would cease to be. But, if she stayed, then she gave up her hopes of a family, of children. She would grow old and die. He would stay young and alive.

  She could always join him. Horror shuddered through her at the thought of drinking blood, and her mind instantly shut out the possibility. She couldn't do that, no matter what, she couldn't do that. She had to give him up. She had to. Tears streaked her face as she took a stumbling step forward and halted.

  "Go, Sera," he muttered. "Leave."

  She sobbed as she fell against the door. "Liam," she whispered.

  He didn't turn to her. He kept his eyes firmly shut as he waited for her to leave. It took every ounce of strength he possessed not to grab her and keep her from leaving him. It took all he had not to grab her and force the memories from her mind. But he could not, would not, do that to her, to himself. It was better to end it now, to let her leave, instead of having to give her up in five years, ten years, when he loved her even more.

  The touch on his arm caused his eyes to fly open. Immersed in his grief, he hadn't heard her approach. "Sera," he managed to choke out.

  "I don't want to leave," she whispered.

  He fought back the hope threatening to choke him. "I can offer you nothing."

  "You can offer me you. I just want you."

  He was frozen as his conscience waged war with his heart. His heart won out. With a groan, he pulled her snugly against him. "I hope you understand what this means," he said hoarsely.

  "Yes."

  "I'm never going to let you go now. Do you understand that?"

  "I don't want you to."

  His heart contracted as his hands convulsed around her. He buried his head in her fragrant hair. He had never done anything to deserve her. He didn't understand how she could love him so willingly, so freely, and so openly. She clung to him, her head buried in his chest, completely vulnerable, and giving.

  He held her for a long time, unwilling to release her. She yawned, and he took a small step back. He lifted her and crossed the room in three long strides to lay her down on the bed. "Lay with me," she whispered.

  He climbed in beside her. She nuzzled closer to him as she savored in his strength and warmth. He held her in his arms, clinging to her as if he was a drowning man and she was his life raft. Which, she was.

  Chapter Eleven

  Liam's back was pressed firmly against the wall; he had one leg drawn up, and his arm draped over it. Mike sat across from him in the easy chair, which he'd turned sideways in, so his long legs dangled casually over the side. He was smoking a cigarette; the ashes drifted to the floor as he ignored the ashtray in his hand.

  "Well," Mike said. "I'll take care of Jacob's body."

  "Thanks."

  "No problem. What about her?"

  "She'll be all right."

  "You said she was pretty shaken up. Great way to tell her too. I mean, you drop a bombshell on her and then transform yourself into a monster. That's not easy to take."

  "She wouldn't believe me."

  "Did you honestly expect her to?"

  Mike took a long drag of his cigarette. The smoke curled out of his nose as he finally remembered the ashtray and snubbed it out. "I don't know what I expected."

  Mike snorted, pulled out another cigarette, and lit it. "Well, I guess you had to tell her."

  "Yes."

  "I don't know what to say to you, Liam."

  "Then don't say anything."

  "You know this goes against all of our rules."

  "Of course I know it. I made the rules!" he barked.

  Mike took another drag and flicked an ash to the floor. "Yeah, I guess you did."

  Liam rubbed at his throbbing temples. "You'll understand one day."

  Mike chuckled. "I don't think I will. As long as you think it'll be all right, then I won't argue with you. But, I don't like it. I don't want to see either one of you get hurt."

  "She won't be hurt."

  "I hope you won't be either."

  "I won't."

  "Yeah well, I'll stand by you no matter what."

  "Thanks."

  Sera stirred slightly, and he looked down at her. His hand ran through her hair as she rolled over and buried her head in his lap. She opened her eyes and looked dazedly up at him. She sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

  "Hi, Sera," Mike greeted.

  She started, and her hands fell to her sides as she turned to look at him. He appeared casual in the chair, but there was an air of tension around him that belied his demeanor. Her heartbeat kicked up a notch as she suddenly understood why he had been there last night. "Hello, Mike," she greeted.

  He smiled as he flicked an ash to the floor and swung his legs leisurely back and forth. "How are you doing today?"

  Her eyes jumped to Liam, and then back to Mike. "Sera," Liam said as he clasped her hand.

  Mike's eyes were an intense blue as they burned into her. He snuffed his cigarette out and dropped the ashtray to the floor. "I suppose you've figured out I am too."

  Sera's gaze flew back
to Liam's. He squeezed her hand, willing her to be okay. For a minute, she stared at him. Then her eyes sparkled, and a smile curved the corners of her full mouth. She turned back to Mike. "I have."

  Liam pulled her into his arms, nestling her against his chest as he met Mike's gaze above her head. Mike stared back at him as he lit another cigarette and took a long drag. He looked down at Sera, his brow furrowed in puzzlement as he studied her carefully.

  "I didn't know you smoked," Sera mumbled.

  He blew a small smoke ring. "Only once in a while."

  Liam was glad Mike refrained from telling her he only smoked when he was agitated and troubled. "Good thing you don't have to be concerned about lung cancer."

  Mike's eyebrows shot up; he grinned as he took another long drag. "Yep."

  "So who are the other three?"

  "What?" Mike asked.

  Sera lifted her eyes to Liam. "You said four others needed to be protected. Obviously, Mike is one, but who are the other three?"

  Liam's hands tightened on her. They had never exposed themselves before. Mike's eyes focused on him and narrowed pointedly. Liam silently dared Mike to make any objection, but he didn't. Instead, he took another long drag of his cigarette and stubbed it out.

  "You haven't met David. He's going to college in Pennsylvania," Liam said.

  "And the other two?"

  "Doug and Jack," Mike answered. Sera felt as if someone punched her, but she didn't say anything. "Look, you're obviously taking this rather well, but..."

  "You don't trust me."

  "No, I don't."

  Sera bit her bottom lip as she lowered her eyes from his intense stare. Liam's arms were warm and secure around her. Liam trusted her, he would keep her safe, but she wasn't sure it would be enough. He said he couldn’t protect her from all of them. If they decided she was a threat, they would kill her, and Liam, to get to her.

  She lifted her head to gaze at him. His eyes were turbulent, but the love in them was unmistakable. "Do you trust Liam?" she inquired.