She was addicted, and he was already replacing the wall between them that she’d come to hate. This time she didn’t get angry or feel the hot wash of tears burning her eyes; there was nothing left in her for that. Turning, she walked away from him before he could do it to her. She didn’t look at him again as he walked beside her to the hotel.
Chapter Thirteen
Abby stared around the club, her body instinctively swaying to the brisk beat of the music. This was a human club, the kind she was used to, but there were far more vampires here than she was accustomed to in Boston. Between the thrilling vibe of the city and the easy prey found in the bars and clubs, New York was a draw for vamps.
Beside her, Brian scanned the crowd, searching for someone he might know or someone who could be useful. She’d resorted to not speaking to him, as it was easier that way. For the past five days, they’d been snippy and irritated with each other. After what had happened in the park today, she found she had no snippiness left in her. She didn’t have much of anything left in her anymore.
Her heart ached for her sister. Every day, she debated calling her family then decided against it, but if they didn’t find Vicky in the next couple of days, she would be calling Isabelle. At this point, she didn’t have much of a choice. Vicky would be pissed at her for involving their family, but she was running out of options.
What had Vicky become mixed up in, and why couldn’t they find her? The vampire in that drug house in Boston had said no one comes back from where they go. Had it just been the drugs talking or had he actually meant something by that? And where do they go and who are they? Had Vicky gone with them willingly or had they taken her? And why would anyone take her sister? Every day brought more and more questions but no answers.
She tried to maintain calm about it all, but sometimes she couldn’t help but wonder if her sister had become mixed up in drugs and taken off. If maybe no one came back from where they went because they didn’t want to.
Not Vicky, she decided firmly. This unending search for her sister was rattling her resolve a little, but she knew Vicky wouldn’t be mixed up in drugs, and she never would have taken off, at least not without calling her first. She may have quit school and been partying more, but Vicky would never abandon her in such a way.
Brian glanced at Abby by his side. He disliked the pallor of her skin and the firm set of her lips as she surveyed the crowd. Her fingers were pulled into the sleeves of her V-neck, form-fitting black sweater. The color of the sweater enhanced the paleness of her hair and the vibrant green of her eyes.
He could stare at her for hours and never get bored as she wore her emotions on her face, and he loved to watch them playing across her delicate features. She frowned in consternation when someone danced too close to her, then smiled when the song switched to one she began swaying along to. It was all noise to him but she enjoyed it.
He’d thought he’d welcome her silence as a buffer between the two of them, but he found he resented it. He’d hated the bickering between them these past five days; he’d gladly welcome it back, if she would only talk to him again.
Be grateful. This is for the best. He couldn’t be grateful when all he wanted to do was take her back to the hotel and finish what they’d started in the park. He recalled Declan’s words about his progressing insanity. That was exactly the way he’d begun to feel, like he was unraveling a little bit at a time until there would be nothing left but this maddening urge to possess her in every way.
Then what would happen? Would he give into this insanity, take her by force, or succeed in pulling away from her? None of those options was any good, but he felt like he was losing his mind.
That kiss today was the first time he hadn’t felt guilt over kissing a woman since Vivian’s death. Granted, it had only been a kiss, but he desired her more than he had desired anyone else before her, including the wife he’d loved so much. Such a realization would have had guilt eating away at his insides with any other woman, but with Abby he only wanted more.
He rubbed his hand over his face, scratching at the stubble shadowing his jaw. Abby stepped onto the dance floor and wound her way through the crowd. He watched the sway of her hips with a burgeoning hard-on before striding forward to catch up with her. He pushed aside anyone who dared to get too close to her. She didn’t notice, or at least she never acknowledged him, as she made her way to the bar and settled onto a stool.
The bartender hurried to her, drawn by her inherent vampire ability to lure others in and her amazing vitality. Life didn’t radiate from her right now as vibrantly as it normally did. Exhaustion, stress, and fear were beating her down, but she was still surrounded by an aura of warmth. An aura that had him reaching out to brush her hair aside before he could stop himself as he sought to soothe her in some way.
Abby shied away from his touch. She was so unbelievably tired of this back and forth game they played. A game that was gradually shredding away pieces of her soul. “Don’t.”
His hand fell away as frustration and anger warred within him. He turned toward the bartender and barked out a drink order before resuming his search of the crowd. She’d shrank away from his touch, told him not to touch her. He should be happy; instead, he found himself fighting against tearing everyone in this room to shreds.
Turning back to her, he almost seized hold of her shoulders and dragged her against him. Who was she to deny him what was rightfully his? And if they were mates, then she was his. That possessive impulse swelled in his chest, causing him to step closer to her while she glared at him as if he was the worst form of life. He could feel the madness slithering through his mind, the insanity swelling forth as he fought against taking possession of her.
“I’m not playing this game with you anymore,” she spat. “Back away from me, now.”
“I’m not playing games, Abby.”
“But you are,” she replied, and smiled at the bartender when he handed her the Rum Runner she’d ordered.
She grabbed hold of her straw and took a sip of her drink, refusing to acknowledge the seething vampire standing at her side. She understood his frustration, understood the draw between the two of them, but she refused to give into it again when he was acting like a thirteen-year-old girl who couldn’t decide which outfit to wear when it came to her. There was no way she was going to be tried on and tossed aside again by Mr. Can’t-Make-Up-His-Mind because he had commitment issues.
Because he’s committed to his dead wife. Yep, that reminder made her resolve settle more firmly into place. Grabbing her drink, she spun to face the crowd. “Do you see anyone you know?” she asked him.
She could feel his eyes boring into her, but she didn’t look at him again. Finally, he focused on the crowd, and after a few minutes, he nodded. “I do.”
“Maybe you should see what he knows.”
Brian wasn’t used to being dismissed or ordered around. “This isn’t done, Abby.”
She glanced at him from under the sweeping fringe of her blonde lashes. “But it is.”
He banged his fist onto the bar before spinning away and storming into the crowd. The people eagerly parted to allow him to pass.
“It’s none of my business, miss, but are you okay?”
She turned and smiled at the human male who had eagerly slid into Brian’s empty spot. “Fine,” she assured him. “Thank you.”
His eyes latched onto her mouth when she took hold of her straw again. Ugh. Just what she needed, an oversexed human who believed her to be vulnerable at the moment, or maybe he assumed she was in an abusive relationship and he could rescue her. Who knew what the human was thinking, and she didn’t care to find out, as she was perfectly capable of rescuing herself.
She watched Brian as he stopped before a young woman with brown hair dangling against her waist. Not a he and not a vampire, Abby realized.
A stab of jealousy hit her so fiercely she nearly crushed the glass in her hand when the woman squealed and threw her arms around his neck. Abby’s f
angs sprang free, her teeth gritted as she fought the killing impulse trying to take her over.
She’d never felt this way before, never been so close to this very treacherous precipice of losing all control as the woman leaned back to smile at him. Her arms remained wrapped around his neck; his arm was around her waist as they swayed to the music. Their movements were extremely far off the rapid beat filling the room as they moved slowly back and forth, laughing and talking.
The woman was stunning, so dark compared to his lightness. They made such a striking couple, and he wasn’t pushing the woman away, wasn’t jerking her this way then that way, as he constantly did with her. A lump lodged in her throat as the glass in her hand cracked.
“Apparently he’s found someone new,” the human commented as he leaned closer to her.
Abby shot him a look, and her eyes fell to the vein in his neck as she fought the impulse to lean over the bar and sink her fangs into him, to tear his throat out and ease some of the jealousy festering within her like an infected cut. The human’s heartbeat picked up, but he didn’t move away from her.
This idiot didn’t realize how close he was to death, but if she didn’t get away from him, he would. She placed her leaking glass on the bar with far more calm than she felt. Another glance at Brian and the woman revealed they were still deep in conversation as they danced close together. She wouldn’t be able to get a slip of paper between their bodies, she realized in disgust.
The woman stood on her tiptoes, her breasts flattening against his chest. Brian’s head bent so that her lips rested against his ear. He smiled as she spoke.
That was it, the final straw.
Abby leapt from her chair. The human grabbed her arm, but she waved him away as she fought against the impulse to take him into a back corner and feed on him. She had to do something to help curb the bloodlust growing within her, and she had a feeling that even though Brian was occupied with the human, it would piss him off to find her feeding on someone else. She would love to piss him off right now, but with the way she was feeling, she may end up accidentally killing the human if she did feed from him.
Throwing back her shoulders, she slipped into the crowd and made her way toward the door. She had to get out of here, had to get away from Brian before he drove her to kill someone, something she’d vowed never to do. She’d never be able to live with herself if she killed an innocent, could never live with the shame of her family knowing what she’d done, and they would know. There was no way to mask the scent of a vampire who had killed from any of her siblings.
Shame jolted through her. Her sister was missing, and she was falling apart. Vicky was counting on her. Vicky’s not counting on you. Vicky left you behind, you idiot. She doesn’t want to be found.
Tears burned her eyes as she studiously avoided going within a fifty-foot radius of Brian and the woman. She tried to tell herself that Vicky hadn’t left her behind, something had to be wrong, but she was feeling like a kicked puppy right now.
Finally making it to the front of the club, she grabbed her coat from the coat check girl and fled into the bright lights of the city that had dazzled her before. Now all she felt was hollow as she hurried to the curb and flagged down the first cab she saw. Before she could rethink what she was doing, she flung open the door, slid inside, and closed it behind her.
“Where to?” the cabby inquired.
Abby contemplated that for a second. Where was she supposed to go now? She’d fled the only vampire she knew in this city, and she hoped never to see him again. Shuddering, she wrapped her arms around her stomach as she fought the urge to start sobbing and never stop. The cabby looked at her like he regretted pulling over for her and was contemplating tossing her back onto the street.
Before he could do that, Abby gave him the name of the hotel where she was staying, and he pulled away from the curb. She should leave this city, return to her life, and let Vicky do whatever she chose to do. Her sister was an adult; she was capable of making her own decisions, but the idea of not knowing what happened to her twin caused something inside her to wither and die.
Vicky may not want her, but Abby wanted her sister. Maybe it was selfish, but she wasn’t ready to give up, not yet. She had to get away from Brian though. She couldn’t do this anymore with him. Every day their constant push and pull was destroying her a little more. He loved a dead woman; she was an idiot. It didn’t matter if they actually were mates or not, all that mattered was she was losing herself in this mess, and she couldn’t allow that to happen.
Abby threw the cabby some cash and leapt out of the car when he stopped at the hotel. She wouldn’t have much time before Brian realized she’d left. If he chose to come after her, she had to be far from here by then. He may have followed her scent to the park, but he wouldn’t be able to trail her through an entire city filled with scents and people.
* * *
Marissa played with the hair at his neck as she swayed against him. Brian gritted his teeth against the feel of the woman. At one time, he may have contemplated bedding her, it had been seven years after all, but now he found himself repulsed by the feel of her. He forced himself to smile as Marissa chattered on about her ex-boyfriend’s drug connections.
“Then the asshole actually tried to get me to do some, can you believe that?” she inquired.
“Fool,” Brian said.
He glanced at Abby as a young man leaned toward her. Brian’s eyes narrowed on them, but Abby remained as aloof with the human as she’d been with him. She believed he was playing games; he believed he was playing with fire. At this point, he’d welcome being seared by her heat if it meant finally having some kind of release from this unending torment.
“Have you heard anything about some underground clubs and raves that are moving about, ones involving the vampire world?” Brian asked Marissa.
Marissa was a Feeder, a human who knew of their existence and allowed vampires to feed from her in the hopes of one day being turned by one. She kept the secret of their existence in exchange for the possibility of immortality. Also, the first vamp who had brought her into their fold had planted it in her mind that she could never reveal their existence to a human without excruciating pain followed by certain death.
Marissa nodded in response to his question as she rubbed her breasts against his chest. The erection Abby could so easily bring to life softened with Marissa. He couldn’t wait to be free of her.
“I have,” she whispered in his ear. “But I’ve been told not to talk about it.”
His curiosity was piqued as he turned his head into her ear. “You’re not to talk of it with humans or with vamps?” he inquired.
“With anyone else.”
“Was this implanted in your head by a vamp?”
She leaned back. “Yes.”
Shit! Just as she could never reveal their existence without death, she’d never be able to tell him anything. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. True regret shimmered in her hazel eyes.
He may be able to get into her mind to undo the command, but it would take a while and a lot of patience. There was also a chance his probing may trigger something in her mind that could kill her anyway.
“Would I be able to talk to your ex about this?” Brian inquired.
Her mouth pursed as she deliberated her next words. “If you would like to talk to Garth, I can always give you his number.” Her breath froze, she braced herself for intense pain but after a minute, her shoulders sagged and a smile spread across her mouth when she remained the same. “Let me see your phone.”
He handed his phone over to her and watched as her fingers flew across it. “There’s both of his numbers,” she said.
Stepping against him again, she slid the phone into his pocket. Her hand brushed against his shaft as she maneuvered the phone in his pants. His dick shrank away from her touch as surely as it would shrink in the Arctic Ocean. She didn’t notice as she gave him an inviting smile and pressed her hips against his.
�
�I could make you happy,” she murmured, and batted her lashes invitingly.
He grabbed hold of her hand when she tried to stroke him and pulled it away. “’Fraid not tonight.”
She pouted prettily, but it only made his revulsion increase when she ground her hips against him again. He managed to keep himself from throwing her hand away. She’d risked her life to help them, and he couldn’t repay her with callousness now. He also may need her help in the future, and a pissed off woman was one who tended not to be so willing to talk.
“Come on,” she purred. “It looks like your date has left anyway.”
Brian stiffened as his eyes flew to the bar and Abby’s now-empty seat. He blinked once before his gaze flew around the crowd surrounding him. He didn’t see her anywhere amid the dancing couples, didn’t feel the pulse of her aura within the confines of the club. She wouldn’t have been so reckless as to leave here on her own; she couldn’t have left him.
He stalked through the crowd, shoving people and vamps out of his way to arrive at the bar in mere seconds. His gaze fell on the puddle of liquid spreading beneath her nearly empty, cracked glass. His heart sank and his gut twisted as he spun toward the human who had been talking with her.
“Where did she go?” he snarled.
“If she was smart, far from you,” the human replied. When Brian took a step toward him, the human blanched and moved closer to a group of humans behind him.
Running a hand through his hair, Brian tugged at it as he spun to face the crowd. Panic threatened to engulf him when he scanned the crowd once more. Easy. You can find her. Remain calm.
He could find her, but would it be too late? There were so many dangers out there. Abby was strong, but so were the vampires who killed and fed on others. A pureblood vampire, with her looks and vitality, would be a prime target for someone seeking to increase their power, much like he had increased his power on the blood of others. If any of his enemies had seen the two of them together over the past week, they would eagerly drain her dry.
The Vampire Awakenings Bundle: Books 1-5 Page 126