by P. M. Briede
When Wesley looked over and saw me crying, everything about him broke. “Charlotte, God please don’t, I didn’t lie to you…”
“Fine Wesley, but you did actively hide the truth.” I spat the words at him, finally succumbing to the emotional eruption I’d forced dormant in order to get through this ordeal. “How could you do that, she’s our best friend! She needed your support not your…” I couldn’t say it. The pain was too much. I knew it was unfair to judge him so harshly, especially since I’d been so calm and forgiving with Olivier and Paige. But Wesley was different. He claimed to love me so his lies hurt me the most. I’d always thought he was better than the rest of us, more noble. Now I was finding out he wasn’t. My skin throbbed, my tears stung, and my heart broke. I could hear the heart monitor’s rhythm escalate but I didn’t care. The nurse couldn’t get there fast enough with my desired medications.
Tears were streaming down his cheeks and his voice was desperate. “Charlotte, please,” he begged, “calm down. We shouldn’t be having this discussion now, you need rest.” He knelt beside me, gently stroked my hand, and tried to soothe me.
“How am I supposed to rest when all I can focus on is how the people I love, that I trust most in this world, have lied to me about some of the biggest facets of their lives? How Wesley, you tell me how, because I am desperate to know how to stop second guessing everything you’ve ever said to me? I’m anxious to stop the intense pain that isn’t from my burned skin. I thought I knew you. Now I know nothing.”
This wasn’t fair, but once the pot of my emotions boiled over, I couldn’t stop myself from taking out the anger and contempt I held for all of them out on him. A tempest was about to take over my life, and I’d done nothing to deserve it, but I was going to get swept up all the same because of two infernal men.
“Everything alright, Mrs. Charlotte?” Nurse Janison entered the room and when she saw the two of us her eyes hardened on Wesley. “Sir, I distinctly remember telling you not to upset her. This isn’t going to help her recovery. I think it’s time for you to leave.”
“Give me a minute,” he gruffly begged without looking at her. She peeked around him to lock eyes with me and I acquiesced. When the door closed again, I continued to look at it and not his tear-stained, grief-stricken face. “Charlotte please, you do know us. We’re still the same people and we all still love you. We can get through this but I need you to get better first.”
Empty and exhausted, I closed my eyes and realized he was right. Not about getting through us, I honestly still didn’t know about that yet. But he was right that before I dealt with my relationships with any of them, Olivier, Paige, or Wesley, I needed to get better first. “Thank you for the truth, Wesley.” The finality of our talk seeped from my words.
“Cha…”
“You need to go, now please.” I needed to be alone and cut him off with a command, not request, I knew he’d hear.
He stood and stumbled to the door as if in a haze. As he opened it he turned back to me. “Charlotte, I was wrong and I know that. I will never forgive myself and therefore have no right to ask for yours. If you find it in your heart to forgive me, to keep loving me, you know how to find me. I’ll never stop loving you and no matter what, I’ll keep my promise to you.”
“What promise?” I asked. I had no idea what he was referring to.
“You will never lose me, even though I may have just lost you.” With that he walked out, closing the door behind him. Through the window I saw his violently shaking shoulders, as he was overcome with a devastation that rivaled my own flood of despair.
Chapter 3
I refused to see any of them the rest of my time in the hospital. The time alone allowed me to sort through my emotions, focus on healing, and make decisions about how to protect them and myself. As my doctor weaned me off my meds, I realized my anger at Wesley stemmed more from withdrawals than my own real emotions.
The nightmares also didn’t help. Now familiar with the experience of burning alive, my mind continuously focused on the pain of that damn green fire of judgment, the ignes iudicii. The searing, shocking pain that even falling into a fountain hadn’t quelled. But in truth, they weren’t the worst of it. No the worst was her voice. That booming, ominous, sinister voice, railing in my head about death and failure and getting back control.
I was released from the hospital only to be filled with sadness when, for the second time since dating Wesley, I came home to an empty house in the Garden District, early the Wednesday morning after the fire. There were floral arrangements and cards littering my kitchen. I picked up the phone and called Paige. “Do you know where Wesley is?” I asked after her effusions about being so glad I’d finally called and offers to get me whatever I needed.
Silence answered me and remained longer than I would have thought. “Charlotte, he left.” He’d what?! I’d basically told him too and chastised myself for thinking he wouldn’t. “Before you freak out, he’s scheduled to be back tomorrow. He’s just in Alabama with the campaign. He said you told him to take the job. Charlotte, why, with everything that’s going on, would you tell him to do that?”
“I didn’t tell him to take it; I just didn’t tell him not to. Olivier’s right, if we do anything to alter his decisions then it’s going to put us all in danger. If the exiles have been watching and working on him since we were fourteen they’re going to know him as well as you and I do.” I started going through the cards and arrangements, and of course the largest arrangement, full of calla lilies, my favorite, was from Wesley. I smelled them and asked Paige if she’d call Olivier to come by in about half an hour. I needed to talk to them.
I dialed Wesley’s number as I spread the flowers throughout my home. He didn’t answer so I left him a message. While listening to mine, again more condolences and well wishes, my doorbell rang.
“Olivier!” I exclaimed as I opened the door. He stepped across my threshold, uninvited, and crushed me to him. Given that I was only one week past having become a crispy critter, I was stunned when the embrace didn’t hurt at all so I wrapped my arms around him. When he released me, I pulled back to look into his eyes and saw the flames dancing in his irises. That fire which burned inside him and clued me into what he really was erupted in his eyes. My skin tingled, but it wasn’t painful anymore.
“Why did you remove us all from the visitor lists?” Olivier charged. “Do you know how worried I’ve been? How worried we’ve all been?” His emotions were raw and etched all over his face. This new, open Olivier was going to take some getting used to.
“You were all right,” I answered, “my primary focus needed to be on me. Dealing with everything, I was developing a dependency on the painkillers, since the pain from my injuries wasn’t the only thing they numbed. After my raging emotional state during my visit from Wesley, I realized I needed to deal with the pain from my injuries and all the lies, medication free, or I wouldn’t be able to be rational about anything that’s about to come.” I took a breath and Olivier nodded his acceptance of my explanation. “How’d you get here so fast? I only got off the phone with Paige maybe ten minutes ago.”
Chagrinned, he turned away from me. “Yeah, about that. I, uh, I live around the corner.”
“You what?!” That was a surprise. “For how long?”
He walked into the den, like he owned it, and sat down on the couch. He patted the spot next to him and ignored my question. I arched an eyebrow at him. The scared Olivier was packed away and the over-confident man I’d gotten to know over the last five months re-emerged. “Dare to sit next to me, my dear?”
Laughing at his jest, I answered the phone as I sat. “Hello?”
“Charlotte! You sound good?” It was Wesley and hearing me laugh seemed to put him off balance. “Um, so you’re home and it seems everything is okay.”
I’d planned on answering him and apologizing for my behavior in the hospital, but Olivier had gently taken my arm and was undoing the bandage. “What exactly are you doing
?” I covered the mouthpiece of the phone and whispered at Olivier while trying to pull my arm back. “The hospital just changed those.”
A mischievous smile pulled up the corners of Olivier’s mouth as his eyes met mine. He didn’t stop unraveling the bandage though. His sensual “trust me” slid past his lips at the same time Wesley’s challenging, “Charlotte, are you still there?” wailed out of the phone.
With a roll of my eyes I left Olivier to his soothing ministrations to refocus my attention on Wesley. “Sorry, yes, I’m still here. Paige says you’re in Alabama but you’re due back tomorrow.”
“Uh, yes,” Wesley’s unsteady voice answered. “I’m in Alabama, but I should be back in about six hours. I left when I got your message saying you were home. Would it be alright for me to stop by tonight instead of tomorrow?”
I heard what Wesley said but was unable to answer. Olivier had again distracted me when he started scattering passionate kisses along the skin of my hand. “Holy crap!” I yelped, dropping the phone. “How the hell did you do that?” I’d pulled my hand away when I’d realized what he was doing, but it wasn’t his kisses that had caused my reaction. The skin his lips had caressed was no longer blistered and taut. Now it appeared as if the burn had been a minor second degree burn, where the blisters had popped and the raw, red skin underneath was exposed.
Olivier just shrugged and smiled at me, but Wesley’s panicked cries were screaming through the phone. I aimed a pointed look at Olivier and instructed him to stay put while I grabbed the phone and went to my bedroom. “I’m here, Wesley,” I said when I was safely behind the door. “Sorry, I should have excused myself from my company earlier.”
Wesley’s panic didn’t subside with my confirmation that I wasn’t alone. “Who’s there with you? Is it Paige?”
He wasn’t going to like the answer but I refused to lie to him. “It’s Olivier. I didn’t want my parents hovering. I called Paige and him because I’m not supposed to be alone. He just got here first.”
Wesley’s voice was hollow as he spoke. “So the two of you are there alone,” he paused before continuing. “I guess that’s what you wanted to talk to me about.”
“Wesley Breaux, don’t you dare take that tone with me.” I wasn’t going to stand for his jealousy. Olivier was going to be a subject of the conversation I needed to have with Wesley, but not in the way he was currently assuming. “Olivier has proven himself to be a good friend to me, and if you claim to love me, I’ll not allow you to deny me access to my friends, darling.” I purposely drawled my pet name for Wesley in an effort to diffuse his misery and jealousy.
I could hear him struggle to regain control of his emotions and regulate his breathing. Finally, his relieved voice poured out the receiver. “Darling, you said darling. Does that mean we’re okay?”
This time I was the one who needed the breath before answering. “We’re not okay, but before you panic, we’re not not okay either. I have a proposition for you, a second chance if you will.” When I paused to let Wesley answer the doorbell rang. Olivier answered it, letting Paige in. It surprised me when Wesley didn’t have anything to say. In the past he’d always been teeming with agreement to anything I wanted in order to repair his perceived affronts. Now, we actually were facing difficulties and he was quiet. “Wesley?”
“I’m here, love,” he whispered. “I just can’t believe that we’re going to be alright. Whatever you need, I’m in.” Ah, there’s the man I fell in love with.
“Look, we have a lot to talk about, but Paige just got here and since you’re on your way home I should probably let you go for now.” I did really want to talk to Wesley over Paige and Olivier, but Olivier’s ability to improve the present state of my hand sent my curiosity into overdrive and I wanted answers. “I love you.”
For the first time since the ball he sounded like his old self. “I love you too, and just so I’m clear, your home?”
Smiling, I gave Wesley the answer he was looking for. “Our home.” For now it was still that.
We hung up and I dashed down the stairs. “Hey, Paige,” I called. I only spared her a moment before turning my back on her, plopping down on her lap, and looking at Olivier. I’d undone the bandage on my other arm on the way down and thrust my bare, blistered hand in his face. “Do it again,” I ordered. Olivier’s charming and sly grin overtook his face. The fire ignited in his eyes as he gently took my hand and brought it to his lips. My arm was immediately engulfed in a heat wave. But the gasp that escaped my lips had nothing to do with arousal. It had everything to do with how my skin changed under his erotic caress.
By this time, Paige had wormed her way out from under me. With my eyes locked on Olivier’s, I didn’t see her reaction but the astonishment that flew out her mouth was enough that I could imagine it. “Charlotte Grace, why exactly is this man kissing his way up your burned arm, and in front of me? I thought you were going to patch thin…” When she stopped I tore my eyes from Olivier. Yup, she saw how his kisses healed me. “Holy shit!” she bellowed.
Unfortunately, she wasn’t gentle when she snatched my arm from him to examine the changes in my condition. “Ow!” I yelped.
She immediately dropped my hand and I instantly explored the damage. “Oh my God! I’m so sorry. I completely forgot,” Paige rambled. Something else caught her eye and her hand darted to grip Olivier by the jaw, turning his face towards hers. “What the hell is happening with your eyes?”
My head snapped to her. “You see it too?!” I removed her hand and turned Olivier’s face back to mine, confirming the flames were still dancing in his eyes. “Finally!” I exclaimed. “Someone else sees them! I thought I was the only one.”
“Ladies,” Olivier apprehensively addressed us, “I appreciate all the attention; really I do. Honestly, I think this was an exact dream I’ve had.” He chuckled uncomfortably, which was understandable with us scrutinizing his face. Hell, I was practically in his lap and Paige had knelt down and wiggled herself between his legs. “What exactly are you talking about?” he asked.
“Your eyes, Olivier,” I answered. “They’re on fire. I’m assuming the ignes iudicii type.” After delivering the truth my skin tingled as the flames erupted, making his eyes shimmer. He made to get up and away from us, but it was impossible to do without potentially hurting me severely. He froze when I grimaced. “They always seem to do it with me, but Paige is the first person I’ve known to notice it too.”
He shifted awkwardly as Paige and I glanced at each other, both deciding not to move. Instead we leaned in closer, determined not to miss any part of his answer. “How long have you noticed this, Charlotte?” he asked skittishly, his wary gaze settling on me.
I closed my eyes to focus my thoughts. It had been happening for so long it was hard to pinpoint when it began. “I believe I noticed it for the first time at the end of our date.” This could actually be confusing since we’d had many “dates” so I clarified by motioning my arm between the two of us as I opened my eyes.
He closed his and rested his head on the back of the couch. It was the only escape option he had to somewhat get away from Paige and me. “That long? I’d worried it might happen, but I didn’t realize it already had.”
Confusion raged through me. So his eyes flamed? He’d said the fire was a weapon all angels possessed. It had to be stored somewhere, right? “What might happen?” I asked as I gently wrapped my hand around the back of his neck, pulling his head back up so I could hold his gaze.
“It’s a sure fire way to identify an angel, no pun intended,” he explained. His eyes opened and were no longer burning, well not with the ignes iudicii anyway. As he continued his voice took on a rough edge and we were nose to nose. “Remember when you asked if I’d shown you my true form?” When I inclined my head to nod, he met me halfway, resting his forehead against mine. “Well, you’ve now seen everything, except for my wings which no human ever sees. Typically, it’s something we hide since it’s an open advertisement that we’re d
ifferent. I guess with you, I must have subconsciously wanted you to know the real me. So I left you breadcrumbs all over the place, ensuring that I’d have to admit the truth at some point.”
My hand had made its way to his face and was slowing grazing back and forth along his jaw line. Paige reminded us both that she was still present by clearing her throat. How had I forgotten she was here? “So that explains why Charlotte sees the flames,” she piped up. “Do I now get to stare longingly into your eyes and have you whisper sweet nothings to me as an explanation?”
Olivier and I both blushed with embarrassment and I pulled away from him. I didn’t get far since his arm had slipped around me. When he turned his attention to Paige, I put my head on his shoulder, comforted by his embrace. “Sorry, but I have no endearments for you,” he admitted. “My best guess, since I told you what I am, you can now see it.”
“I’ll buy that. This Ulysses fire is that erased from existence fire you mentioned at the hospital, right?” she inquired. Olivier and I nodded in response. Paige paused while she thought. “Since we’re all friends here, I just want to put you both on notice.” She’d pulled away and was now standing above us, set in her very Paige-like stance. “Olivier, I still stand beside what I said at Mardi Gras. Can you protect Charlotte from yourself?” This statement caused his grip to grow lax around me. “And Charlotte, if you’ve actually chosen Wesley, you need to stop toying with Olivier. Otherwise this whole thing is going to blow up in all of our faces.” The words she’d directed at me lifted my head from his shoulder. “Never thought I’d have to chaperone my own friends to keep them from making out,” she muttered as she went and sat in the chair across from us, crossing her arms against her chest. “Now, how about you tell us why your kisses reduce the severity of her burns.”
Unashamedly, Olivier took my hand in his and brought it to his lips, kissing a spot he’d missed earlier. “I can choose to heal those I have a deep connection with,” he explained. “It doesn’t work on just anyone and I have to want to. It’s actually very draining for me and if I get hurt within a day of doing so, I can’t immediately heal myself.”