Too Near the Edge

by Lynn Osterkamp

  Oops. Now I needed to give her a reason for being anxious to hear from her. I didn’t want to get into the whole Erik thing over the phone. Given her feelings about Erik, it would be a tricky conversation. I preferred to have it in person. Then I remembered the computer, so I said, “I have Adam’s computer at my office.”

  “The police found it?”

  “No—believe it or not, Natalie brought it to me.”

  “What? I can’t believe it! She stole Adam’s computer? Do you know why?”

  “She said she didn’t steal it, that someone else took it and then gave it to her later. She wouldn’t give me any details—just a lot of nonsense about negative energy connected to it.”

  “You can’t believe anything she says,” Sharon said in an exasperated tone. “I told you she’s a total liar. I bet you anything she stole it herself.”

  “But then why would she give it back? And she said no one was able to boot it up, so they didn’t do anything to it.”

  “Did you tell the police? I’d love to see Natalie arrested.”

  “No, because I figured they’d take the computer, and we might not get it back for who knows how long.”

  “Good point. But I have a mountain of laundry and stuff to do tonight, so I really can’t come get it now. Anyway, we can’t get into it without Erik, and he’s going to Denver to meet with some people who might invest in his business. So how about I get it tomorrow when I come for my contact session?”

  I was relieved to hear Erik would be otherwise occupied. I wanted to keep him away from Sharon and Nathan, and from Adam’s computer—but I hadn’t yet decided what I would tell Sharon about him. I needed some time to think without distractions. So I took her suggestion with enthusiasm. “Tomorrow is good for me. But let’s look at the computer after your contact session, so it’s not a distraction.”

  “Okay. I’m dropping Nathan off at a friend’s at 1:00, so I’ll be there by 1:30 with no problem.”

  “Great. Don’t forget to bring Adam’s shirt and a picture.”

  Chapter 34

  I called Pablo to let him know Sharon and Nathan were safely home. Got his voice mail and left a message. I couldn’t reach Joel either, so I left a message on his cell. I finished at my office, had a good workout at the gym, and picked up a grilled chicken burrito at Illegal Pete’s to enjoy on my patio with a cold beer. Sitting out there, where Grampa and I had had so many deep discussions, I tried to access some of his wisdom. How could I best warn Sharon away from Erik, without telling things I promised Harry I wouldn’t tell? And how dangerous was Erik? When Pablo got back should I tell him everything Harry told me, and let him decide what to do, or was information from a family member useless as he had implied?

  “Hey Cleo, do you have any more of that beer?” I almost fell out of my chair. It was Erik. My heart thumped. Where had he come from? The sun had sunk behind the mountain while I ruminated, so I didn’t notice him until he was right in front of me. Come to think of it, I hadn’t heard a car either, so he must not have parked in my driveway.

  “Erik! What are you doing here?” My voice sounded shrill. I knew I needed to stay calm so he didn’t pick up my fear and exploit it. So I took a couple of slow deep breaths before I went on. “I thought you were in Denver talking to investors.”

  “Can I grab myself a beer out of the refrigerator?” Erik flashed his usual winsome smile, but after my meeting with Harry, I was forewarned.

  I tried to take control of the conversation, speaking in an even no-nonsense voice. “No, Erik, you can’t. I’m not in the mood for guests tonight, and I don’t appreciate you showing up uninvited like this.”

  He scowled. “You’re in a nasty mood, Cleo. What’s going on?”

  I was so exhausted and overwhelmed and so fed up with Erik that I lost my cool. My emotions bubbled up—my anger at his manipulative behavior, my anxiety for Sharon and Nathan, my outrage about Jenny’s death. Almost as if my voice came from outside my body I heard myself blurt out, “I think I’m the one who should be asking what’s going on, Erik. Or should I say Horace?”

  Erik stared at me sharply, amazed I had uncovered his lies. “Why have you been spying on me? You have no right to pry into my business.” His face contorted in anger. “You’d better not be telling Sharon a bunch of lies about me, or I promise you, you’ll regret it.” I could feel waves of rage rolling off him in my direction.

  I jumped up and hastily backed away to put a little distance between us. “Don’t threaten me, Erik. I’m not as easy to get rid of as Jenny was.” At least I hoped I wasn’t.

  Erik went limp and sank into a chair. He hung his head as if in defeat. “Okay, Cleo, let’s talk. Come on. Sit down.”

  More of his fake quick-change behavior? I didn’t want him to think he could manipulate me at will, but I did want some answers. Like Harry said, the police can never pin anything on Erik. But I wanted him to have to pay for at least some of his evil deeds. I thought I at least had a chance to get some incriminating details out of him, so I decided to let him go on a little longer. I sat in a chair facing him, but about five feet away. I kept my hand on my cell phone in my pocket. “Okay, you have the floor.”

  He leaned forward in my direction. “Cleo, you don’t know anything about my relationship with Jenny. You hardly even knew her. Don’t make judgments about a situation when you don’t know the facts.”

  “Okay, I’m listening.” Calm voice again. “What are the facts?”

  “Jenny had problems. She took a lot of drugs that she got from Dr. Ahmed. I knew she shouldn’t have been taking all that stuff, but it helped her in some ways, so I didn’t complain. She was pretty crazy, so I figured, whatever worked. Even with the drugs, she was a bitch to live with.”

  Now I was shocked as well as angry. No longer cool, I lashed out like a three-year-old. “So you stood by while she died from her asthma attack on that camping trip?”

  “Jumping to conclusions again, Cleo. And even if you were right, you could never prove it. Your reputation around town isn’t so favorable that people will be likely to believe your accusations. You’re just a small-time therapist who figured out a way to trick people into believing you can contact dead people. Anyway, what business is it of yours?”

  Those words stung! He knew exactly how to zing in to my most vulnerable spot. Even so, if I’d been thinking straight, I would have dropped it right there. Knowing what I knew about Erik, why push him, especially when we were alone in a fairly secluded area. But like my namesake, Cleopatra VII, I don’t take kindly to being put down, and I will stand up for what I believe even when the personal consequences may be dire. So I plunged ahead. “It’s my business what happens to Sharon, and I don’t think she’s safe with you. I’m thinking Adam had discovered your lies, which was what had him so worried. Did he know, or guess too much? Did you find a way to eliminate him like you did Jenny? Is that why you’re so against Sharon contacting Adam?” I stopped for a breath.

  Erik seemed strangely calm. Or maybe he was getting ready to smash me. I couldn’t tell. He sat there saying nothing, just staring at me for maybe two minutes. As a therapist, I’ve learned to wait for people to speak, and I had vented most of my pent-up emotions by then, so I sat quietly.

  Finally Erik said, “It wasn’t me Adam was worried about. It was Sharon’s dad, Donald Waycroft.”

  Wow—yet another story? “I thought you said Adam was stressed out from losing money on internet gambling.”

  Erik shrugged. “I said that to shut you up. I didn’t want to upset Sharon by bringing up problems involving her dad.”

  “Oh come on, Erik. Do you expect me to believe you now, after you’ve lied about everything including your name?”

  “Look, you wanted to know the truth. I’m telling you the truth. If you don’t want to believe me, that’s your problem.”

  “No, Erik, it’s your problem. Because I’m not going to give up until we contact Adam, and find out what really happened.”

 
; “Who exactly do you think will believe the testimony of a dead man that you supposedly contacted? Think about it, Cleo. You already have a reputation as a flake. You even have a complaint filed against you as a fraud. How far do you want to push this?”

  Who was calling who a fraud? I couldn’t let that go by. It came over me like road rage. “You’re the expert fraud artist, from what I’ve heard—Horace. What about all this nutrition nonsense? You’re no nutritionist.” I heard myself shouting this out, at the same time I thought I needed to back off before things got any more ugly.

  Erik jumped up from his chair, heading in my direction. In my rush to get up before he got any closer, I turned over my chair. But he walked right by me toward the side of the house.

  “Don’t panic, Cleo. In spite of what you think, I’m not a killer. You’re safe with me, and so is Sharon.” With that Erik disappeared into the dusk, leaving me trembling like Aspen leaves in the wind.

  I pulled myself together, took my dishes inside, locked the doors and sat down to figure out my next move. The wind picked up outside and clouds rolled in heralding an early-evening thunderstorm. I was jumpy, startling at every little sound. What if Erik decided to come back? Pablo was on a plane to Oregon by now. I thought about calling the Boulder police, but what could I tell them that would get them to do anything about Erik? I had no proof he’d hurt anyone and he hadn’t even threatened me.

  I considered going out, just to be around other people, but I was worn out from my trip the day before, plus all the emotional energy I had expended worrying about Sharon and confronting Erik. Finally I took a bath and went to bed early. I slept fitfully dreaming about someone chasing me down a long dark trail.

  Chapter 35

  On Friday, I was still stewing about Erik when Sharon arrived for her session at 1:30. But I didn’t want to distract her by talking about anything other than Adam, so I didn’t mention Erik or the camping trip.

  It was sunny and a bit breezy as we took our soothing stroll along Boulder Creek to help Sharon clear her mind and focus on Adam. I tuned in to the sounds of the rushing water, trying to clear my own mind, hoping to get some fresh insights. I found myself thinking about Adam’s computer, which I wanted to get into without Erik’s help. But I had no idea how to do that.

  We got back to my office about 2:30. After I got Sharon settled in the apparition chamber, I sat down at my desk to finish my letter to the Colorado Mental Health Department of Regulatory Agencies in response to the complaint Waycroft had filed against me. Ten of the twenty days they had given me to reply had already gone by and I’d promised Bruce I’d respond in a timely way, so I wanted to get my letter into the mail.

  I thought about the criticisms of spiritualists like John Edward and Rosemary Altea, who supposedly use their psychic abilities to bring messages to the living from the spirit realm. Investigators say these psychic mediums only pretend to get information from spirits, but in fact cleverly collect material from their subjects and offer it up as a mystical revelation. I was sure Waycroft saw me as just one more charlatan who pretended to be in contact with someone’s dead loved one, but was actually feeding back information obtained from the living.

  I am quite prepared for people to doubt me and the contact process. Which is why I’m so selective about who I take into the project, why I don’t promote it or publicize it, and why I don’t participate in events like Narmada’s psychic fair. In fact, I mainly offer the contact opportunity to people whose grief is complicated or severe, and who I think will benefit from handling their grief in a more direct way. Sometimes they can make peace with the dead person, tie up loose ends or get answers to questions—all of which promotes healing.

  I was so completely immersed in making these points in my letter, that I didn’t notice how much time had gone by until the chamber door opened. It was nearly 4:00. Sharon stood in the hall, tears streaming down her face, but smiling at the same time—like a rainbow in a summer afternoon storm.

  “Adam,” she sobbed. “I saw him. We talked. It was amazing.”

  I led her slowly to the sofa in the counseling room, handed her a box of tissues, put a tall glass of water on the table next to her, and sat down in the armchair. Sharon sat wide-eyed staring off into space for several minutes, then turned to face me. “He was just like he always was,” she said in astonishment. “It was like he’d never left.”

  “I’m so happy for you, Sharon,” I said softly.

  “He walked out of the mirror and was right there in the room with me. We talked. He said he’s sorry to have left me and Nathan, and wishes it could be easier for us, but he’s okay where he is. He put his arms around me and hugged me. It felt so soft and loving. It was wonderful—I needed that so much!”

  “What about your questions? Did he say anything about how he died?”

  “He said he was walking on the trail and someone pushed him from behind. He didn’t see who it was.”

  “Did he say who he thinks it might have been?”

  Sharon took a long drink of water and sighed. “No. He wanted to talk about other times, times we had together, times with Nathan. The question of who pushed him didn’t seem to matter to him at all.”

  “Did he tell you what he was so worried about?”

  “Not really. I asked him if it was Erik he was worried about, and he said, ‘Get the money from Erik. You need the money.’ I tried to get him to explain that but he didn’t. Then he said not to trust my dad with Nathan. I told him I’d already stopped the point-system thing Dad was doing. I have no idea how he knew about that.”

  “Did you ask him about his computer?”

  “I did, but I forgot to ask until he began fading away. Then, when I asked about it, he said, ‘Don’t trust customers to pay on time.’ I told him that we need the password to get into the computer, but he just kept saying, ‘Don’t trust customers to pay on time.’ He seems mostly worried that Nathan and I won’t have enough money. Maybe there are some invoices on his computer from customers who owe him money.”

  I decided to take the plunge. “Sharon, I’m thinking we should find a way to get into that computer without Erik’s help. After what Adam said about getting the money from Erik, I’m wondering whether there might be something on the computer about that. And, I have to tell you, Erik isn’t exactly who he seems to be.”

  I had been focusing intently on how to phrase this because of my worry that any criticism of Erik would not sit well with Sharon. When she didn’t respond at all, I was afraid I had gone too far. But I noticed she had fallen asleep right there on the couch. She looked so relaxed and peaceful, I decided not to wake her. I hoped she was dreaming of Adam, maybe reliving their reunion.

  About fifteen minutes later, Sharon woke with a start. “Wait! Now I’ve got it! That’s the password. Don’t trust customers to pay on time—that’s the password. Give me a pen and a piece of paper.”

  I handed her the pen and paper. She grabbed it and wrote “Dtc2Pot.” Then she jumped up and said, “Where’s my watch? What time is it? I’m supposed to be home for Nathan to be dropped off at 5:00.”

  “It’s 4:30,” I said, handing Sharon her watch. “Maybe you could go ahead, and I’ll put Adam’s computer in my car and bring it over. We can try the password at your house.”

  “Great! Thanks, Cleo. I’ll see you in a few minutes.” Sharon picked up her purse and dashed out.

  Chapter 36

  I loaded up Adam’s computer, locked my office, and took Broadway across town to Sharon’s house on Ash. When I turned into her driveway, I noticed smoke coming from Adam’s office in the back. I dashed around the house to see what was going on. Sharon, Nathan and another boy who looked to be about his age were standing on the stone patio between the house and the office. As I ran over to them, I could see Nathan’s face was streaked with soot and tears. Both he and his friend were filthy and dripping wet. Sharon talked intently to them.

  As I walked up, she paused, looking to the boys for a response. “
But Mom, I need to talk to Dad as much as you do,” Nathan sobbed. “You wouldn’t let me go with you to Cleo’s, so how was I supposed to reach him?”

  Sharon turned to me. “Nathan and Brad snuck over here this afternoon when Brad’s mom thought they were at Martin Park near Brad’s house. They tried to hold a séance to reach Adam—used a bunch of candles and managed to set Adam’s office on fire. They got a hose to put out the fire, soaked themselves, the office and everything in it.” Sharon sounded beyond exasperated.

  “How did you learn about séances anyway, Nathan?” she went on.

  “Brad and me watched a movie on TV about ghosts, where this woman had people sit around a table and light candles. They closed their eyes, and the ghosts came and talked to them. I thought we could do it to talk to Dad.”

  “I know how much you miss Dad, Nathan. We need to talk more about that,” Sharon said, giving him a hug. “But you and Brad could have gotten hurt doing this. Right now, I’m going inside to call Brad’s mother. I want you two to stay right here with Cleo until I get back.” She walked over to the door into the kitchen and went inside.

  “Cleo, my dad didn’t come,” Nathan said sadly. “Why didn’t he? We had the séance in his office because that’s where he mostly hung out. We turned out the lights and used a lot of candles just like in the movie, but he never came. We even tipped the table and banged on it like in the movie. That’s when the fire started. Some candles fell off onto a bunch of papers. Then we had to stop and put out the fire. Do you think Dad didn’t want to talk to me?”

  “No, Nathan, I don’t think it was because he didn’t want to talk to you,” I said, as I scrambled to think of a way to discuss this with a eight-year-old. “Um…the thing is, Nathan, spirits or ghosts or whatever can’t just show up whenever someone calls them—even if they want to. It’s really hard for them to talk to us, I think. It’s like they’re really far away and there’s no phone and no easy way for them to get here.”